"dispare" poems
Your kind is ancient, your skill is an art
The belief of your existence
Is of which most have part
At the sight of dust, there's a smile on your face
For the darkness brings the urge for a particular taste
You lurk in the shadows,
Awaiting your next victim
This exotic taste is the fuel found within
You sit at his right hand
An feet or two, maybe three, no further
For he is ruler, king and also your father
His voice echoes through the walls of the covernant
With only a glance, he killed dozens of tyrant
The days are so beautiful,
Yet you are in dispare
For where the sun shines
You can never go near
A creature of perfection in every single way
Yet your beauty shines its radiance most at night than day
With skin so soft, the rays of light burns
And as is tradation,
To dust you'll turn
La Vida Love
Oct 7, 2016
Oct 7, 2016 at 9:24 AM UTC
In the motherland amongst the wind of the north
Under the shadow of the great fallout
Memories blow around in dispare
Ghosts of fathers past wander
Looking for lost time
And hearts that no longer feel
Never to touch or hold again
Is the price they now have to pay
Tears no longer fall anymore
As silence keeps them close
Nov 26, 2015
Nov 26, 2015 at 1:39 PM UTC
would it really be a crime,
for you and i to stand side by side?
would it truely bring dispare
for you and i to share
would it bring joy
for you and i to enjoy,
this soft embrace
just one time?
a kiss as soft as snow
a subtle touch of hands,
oh darling,
would it truely enrage the land
for us to just hold hands?
Jul 15, 2019
Jul 15, 2019 at 7:17 AM UTC
When I saw you it was winter
for my life was bare and cold,
and ice had covered both my hands
that no others ever hold.
When you smiled it was spring time
as the image warmed my soul,
and you came to me and led me
and taught me to be whole.
When you kissed me it was summer
and my body burned so pure,
as the perfume of your beauty
gave to me my life once more.
When you gave yourself came autumn
as you shed your outer layer,
and gave my soul the sustenance
of your love born of dispare.
When you left me it was winter
and the earth mourned just as I,
for if I said I'll always love you
then my love would be a lie.
For without there's no season
in which I wish to live,
so my love Ive come to join you
prayer my weakness please forgive.
May 29, 2012
May 29, 2012 at 8:54 AM UTC
The underworld,
hidden from the heavens,
so deep down,
that no-one hears your screams.
Traps you from the light,
turns you into a living corpse.
Leaves you in depression,
giving you no reason for life!
The underworld,
a black pit of dispare,
taking all hopes, crushing all dreams,
leaving you with a darkened heart.
The underworld,the place where life ends,
the place I rule and where I wear the loyal reef.
May 14, 2013
May 14, 2013 at 12:21 PM UTC
Darkness, a chill in the air, unexpected sorrow overwelming, she's dead.
Hope is gone and left. Emptyness is at the door creeping in like death himself. Death came quckly that night,passing right over my brother and decided to take another.
No one. Knew untill halfway throught the night, in the silance, at the time of change. He stood over her and let a silent tears flow from his eyes. Her pain was gone, her soul resting etirnialy with God.
His pain just beginning. His life was reset, everything changeing because she was dead.
The comprehension of death is and will remain imposable. It's the second thing that unites humanity. And it's the first thing we come to fear naturaly. It's a fear not learned or over come.
Death is the crul irony of life bringing relife and stress at the same time. Death is the end to what we are a custom to and a beginning to a new life.
Death had changed him.,had made him take on new struggles had made him some how stronger. Death had taken his skin and made it impenatable, only two things could harm him and he avoided the one with out hesatation.
He came to think that with love came more pain and death himself couldn't even bare it . So thus with out love he could live forever and could concur death.
Darkness, a chill in the air, unexpected sorrow overwelming, he's dead.
Hope is gone and left. Emptyness is at the door creeping in like death himself. Death came quckly that night,passing right over to my brother. Oh how I wish he could have claimed another.
Death has become my friend and my enamy leaveing dispare in his wake but like a snake I can avoid him.
For Death is the crul irony of life bringing relife and stress at the same time. Death is the end to what we are a custom to and a beginning to a new life.
Jan 11, 2011
Jan 11, 2011 at 11:40 AM UTC
Go ahead...
taunt Me
I no longer matter in the
doings of Your day to day
Go ahead
distance Me
seperated by hurts
which seep into Our tomorrow
Go ahead
keep moving
I can no longer catch up to
Your love so far away
Go ahead
painful, this place
of isolation and dispare
In hopes that you might care
Go ahead
As I waited
You chose a different way
A path not ment for us to share
Go ahead
I need to fathom
This loneliness that
I can no longer bear
Go ahead
without Me
I am no longer safe
In the Company of Your Heart
~MoonFlower~Fluer de Luna~
Copyright © 2015 Christi Michaels.
All Rights Reserved.
May 29, 2015
May 29, 2015 at 12:40 AM UTC
The blanket of sorrow lay over me.
I’m comfortable here.
As I lay my head on the pillow of dispare,
I’m comfortable here.
Wrapped in the sheets of loss.
I’m comfortable here.
My bed has been made.
Here I will rest.
Jul 28, 2023
Jul 28, 2023 at 7:34 PM UTC
Liars, liars everywhere
Liars, liars no one cares
I'm dying inside, but no one sees
Oh my goodness I just want to sleep
Tears an fears
Death and dispare
All just things to keep you here
Don't go with the flow
Dying more each day
Trying to be strong
So still you move on
Suffering this pain
If you survive no one has to know
No one had to know of your fight
But if you lose
There is no where to hide
So don't even try
Be proud of the death
That sets you free
They all will feel pain
Not seeing your misery
That is there fee
Dec 3, 2014
Dec 3, 2014 at 1:56 PM UTC
I swear I've seen you twice
Once was on a train
You sat next to me and asked me my name
You told a man to take his feet off the seat
You were considerate of others and very sweet
You gave me a pin in the shape of an Angel
You said it would keep me safe and that they would follow me wherever I go
You were an old woman
But you're expression was bright
Your ora gave off a luminous light
You were beautiful
You filled my heart with joy
My day had been long
And I had been coy
I saw you again on a mountain
I was night hiking alone
I had to get away
Like the last time you saw me, I'd had a bad day
I went to the mountain praying for death
I cried to the heavens with all the energy I had left
I said to God, set me free, for I have no more faith in me
I was in an open field and across the way I saw something move
It was an animal in the light of the moon
I'm not sure what animal you were
But it looked at me from a distance, that I'm sure
We glared at eachother
I looked you in your glowing eye
And for some reason I no longer wanted to cry
The hole in my heart had somehow been filled
A helper of the Lord had been revealed
I wanted to walk toward you
But I was afraid
I felt death would be a mistake I could have made
I walked the other way
That I regret
You weren't afraid of me
You didn't fret
I believe in you
I know you believe in me
You are beautiful
You brought out the beauty I now see
The world is cruel
Growing up is intense
When you saw me last I was sitting on the fence
Life or death
Hope or dispare
You rescued me
I know you were there.
Nov 7, 2013
Nov 7, 2013 at 5:06 PM UTC
I bought my happiness at the dollar store; ninety nine cents, plus tax.
I threw the wrapping in the trash inside,
Before I'd even left the store.
I wore it then, the whole way home,
to dinner and to bed.
I even wore it in my dream,
The best sleep I'd ever had.
When I woke in the morning, with great dispare, my happiness was gone.
So here I stand in line again,
With ninety nine cents in hand.
Sep 29, 2014
Sep 29, 2014 at 6:56 AM UTC
Black pain,
Corrupting me,
Killing me,
Sends,
Me falling down.
The Well
Leading to the greatest of dispare.
STOP
The switch has been flipped.
Sky rocketing, floating high
Happy as can be
Strong
Confident
Successful
Achieving
Loving life
STOP
Then it all comes crashing down.
Jumping from the black to the white
The dark to the light
Wishing I could steady out
Not knowing how long
Either will ever last
Feb 17, 2017
Feb 17, 2017 at 4:32 PM UTC
I pity you because you"ll never truly know the feelings you evoke
Searching for the perfect words and overcoming all my nerves
Finally mustered up the courage but to you I'm nothing but a joke
To you a few seconds worth of thought is all a man deserves
Invite me with your eyes until I finally make my move
Then you act surprised with your ego"s point to prove
Or else she's interested, engaged, polite, and very nice
But ladies please listen close to this next piece of advice
Instead of leading us all on and wasting both our valuable time
Would it be so hard to just say no, would that really be a crime
Tell me you have a boyfriend, I don't even care if its a lie
And give me credit for the courage that it even took to try
Take it as a complement and just for a second wear my shoes
All that we could be was dreamt and I woke up with the blues
You burned the blueprints, a beautiful skyscraper was to be built
I looked for clues and hints, now I pray you can deal with the guilt
I envy you, so lucky to be blessed with the ability to ignore
Sweep us under the filthy rug and strike us deep at our core
To be thrown into the junkyard that any man would abhor
You forgot we're also human beings, so I really must implore
Give us a fake number at least it will make us laugh
At least our glass will still be close to holding half
I understand your point of view, I know it must be hard
So many offers every day, always keeping up your guard
Deciding which ones to let in and which ones to discard
All while trying your best to not get emotionally scarred
But believe it or not we have feelings too and hope is like a drug
So stop our digging right away before we have our own grave dug
So I'll say a prayer for you if you truly lack the empathy to really care
Seconds of unnecessary negligence multiply into years of utter dispare
Quite an extensive list of backups just in case your heart begins to tear
The next life we'll all be roadrunners and you a coyote, karma's only fair
Apr 9, 2013
Apr 9, 2013 at 3:50 PM UTC
Silently crying while waiting on dying
My life as a zombie with grey all that i see
A lifeless corpse filled with remorse
A heart made of stone, feeling unknown
Endless life going on without living
No purpose or meaning ever been given
Feeling no peace whether dead or living
A graveyard would serve as a home
Tired, so tired yet never inspired
But pain, feeling better than joy
Has taken my company, residing within me
It also can't go on alone.
A lifetime passes. A year, or a day
By this time I can no longer tell
But i see a small spark, a faint glow in the dark
And i feel such a warmth on my skin
Though first out of fear, my distance i keep
Not wishing to widen the gap
I soon find myself in the same company
And at last my Light I have met
The closer I get to this Brilliant Flame
The lesser and greater my mind numbing pain
It seems all the time I spent in the dark
Had frozen my small rocky heart
I soon felt an ache so terrible and great
In the place I kept calm reserve
And naught but in fright of that Blinding Hot Light
I attacked that for which I had yearned
To my great dispare and no great delight
My anguish had now been passed on to my Light
I have learned through my fight
I must cherish my Light
I now spend my days while at work or at play
Remembering, dreaming of that special day
When my Light pleged to me, her life away
And I cherish each moment I have
Aug 28, 2016
Aug 28, 2016 at 2:56 PM UTC
The greatest pleasures in life are simple
The things you search for and never find
Happiness is my only goal
Moving through life unknowing of what the future may hold
The never ending journey through life is amazing
Even without you by my side
I will conquer my faults nd become a lively soul once again
To walk down the unbeaten path
Ill make my own way with out help from a soul
I have turn from my evil ways and walk in to the light becoming new once agian
Excited for my future
My life was a tragedy day after day page after page
But the rest of my pages are blank so lets turn it in to a comedy
Sealing chapters one through eighteen in my past
Live everyday for today and maybe alittle for tomorrow
Roll with what comes my way
Blind and bind myself from evil
Help every soul possible
Make something of myself
The new me will never be forgotten
The old me is locked away never to return
Good will always prevail
In every-ones heart they know this
Is the world ready for this are they ready for the revolution of me
I want to help everyone know what i know just be happy never turn back to dispare, heartache and misery
Never give in to the evil within
Jan 21, 2010
Jan 21, 2010 at 6:32 AM UTC
When you feel empty it gets harder to write
Or to find motivation in the broad light
You just sit there breathing in air
Rocking back and forth in my hammock thinking about pleasure and dispare
Papers are due but I don't seem to panic
Knowing if I don't do them my grades will sink like the Titanic
I want my feelings to come back because I feel empty inside
At least there's no pain withering in side
For once this emptiness has put up a stride by demolishing the thoughts of suicide that were slowly trying to take over inside
Apr 25, 2015
Apr 25, 2015 at 7:25 AM UTC
Whenever I See You,
I Always Ask What's Wrong,
You Say I Don't Have A Clue,
I Know You're Strong,
But I'm Afraid I'll Lose You,
Of That One Dark Temptation,
I've Stopped You Before,
But How Long Will It Be,
Before You Do It Once More?
You Asked Me,
If I Runaway Would You Come With
I Know How Badly You Wish To Be Free,
But I Said Yes Pretending It Was A Myth,
I Wish I Could Save You,
From The Depths Of Dispare,
If I Did,
What Else Would Be Lurking There?
You Told Me Half The Story,
But What Does That Do?
You Told Me,
If I Told You, You Might Want To Help
The Only One Who Can Help,
Is Yourself
Sep 2, 2012
Sep 2, 2012 at 9:01 PM UTC
With eyes wide shut, my mind paints a vivid picture of the girl I love.
Everything from her frizzy hair, to her weird thumbs, and her amazing mind.
Her laugh makes me weak.
The energy in her spirit causes me to question everything
I ever denied of angels and God.
For if He exist, she is His prized possession.
Your wild antics keep me on my toes.
Your seducing smile sends chills down my spine, cooling the passion burning feverishly in my soul..
But this is a dellusion of the conscience.
When I flip my eyelids you are there,
but not subjected to my love.
You are free of the burdens I place on my chest.
You are only my best friend and I fear that's all you will ever be.
You are my angel that will shine a righteous light and awaken my cold vessel to traquil affection.
Haha, I can only dream..
I stopped believing in fairy tales long ago,
but I will never stop believing in you,
I will never stop listening to you,
I will never stop trusting you,
I will never stop being the rock
you need when the earth beneath you becomes quicksand.
When the world tries to drown you in dispare I will be there to give you life.
I will care for you, feel what you feel because we are one.
You are my better half and
I can't survive withut you.
I wish I could tell you how I feel.
To tell you I love you more
than life itself and I will profess that everywhere anywhere no matter what.
I am proud an grateful for you and all that you have taught me.
Thank you for being my outlet from the hell I suffered through and in
return I was there for you.
I was there to wipe your tears away.
I was there when you thought of taking your life.
I was there when you wanted to go: leave America, marry in Africa, honeymoon in Paris, and grow old in India.
I have been there and I always will.
I am yours..
I wish I didn't neglect you when I did.
I wish I didn't deny my feelings for you, but I am afraid.
It scares me how serious I am about you.
I have cried and ached in your absence.
It hurts, but what's worse is that you don't know.
You may never know.
I never thought that I would be in love with my best friend.
I could only have dreamt it, but when I open my eyes, my feelings applify and I spend the rest of the day lying and repressing them until I slumber and my true reality is born, in which I am together forever with the girl of my dreams..
Aug 12, 2015
Aug 12, 2015 at 6:13 PM UTC
My internal world does not match the exterior
I open my eyes and the flourishing trees
Are bare and shivering
Your face has grown old, years of pain,
Yet I did not see it change.
Your prickly chin now rest above my head
Now hung in dispare, trying to disconnect the past;
My present
The pain you bring is the pain I create
The tides don't pull when I'm not by the sea
The rain doesn't fall when I can't feel the tears of the sky
The wind doesn't sing when I don't feel the rush
The sun doesn't shine when I'm locked in the dark
And my heart doesn't best when it does not belong to you.
Dec 12, 2013
Dec 12, 2013 at 12:58 PM UTC
She holds my heart
For reasons i don't know
But she holds my heart
Don't ask me how
I can't remember
Whether i gave it freely
Or out of dispare and anger
Maybe she persuaded kindly
Or forced my hand
Maybe i lost a bet
Then it's on me
Yet she holds my heart
And she says for keeps
I don't mind really
I wish she'd hold it forever
Cause i have hers
And that's all that matter
Aug 22, 2017
Aug 22, 2017 at 6:28 PM UTC
The sky brightens,
Clouds disperse,
The sun shines,
Then the it stops the sun dips behind a dark cloud,
The land covered in darkness,
There is one who shines,
Standing for all to see carrying the light with them,
Casting back the shadows of dispare,
And revealing the life that can be.
All we have to do is jump.
Take a chance,
Take the leap at a better life,
Take the chance no matter the consequences.
There is always a lighter brighter path you just have to take it.
Feb 6, 2016
Feb 6, 2016 at 3:28 PM UTC
Your always on my mind.
It feels like your changing things from wrong to right.
I think about you day and night.
I feel you by my side.
You come to me with your arms open wide.
You've never failed me before.
Even when my knees hit the floor.
I clasp my hands to talk to you.
And close my eyes to see a knew view.
My thoughts they travel far away.
But it doesn't matter cause your hear to stay.
By my side when I sleep.
Your love for me will always be deep.
I can't think of anything except for being with you.
But my time here is not over.
I hear a voice and look over my shoulder.
I can't see you but I know your there.
Watching me while I'm in dispare.
As times get tough I here your call.
Even when I fall.
Every where I look I see a little bit of you.
The cloudy sky with specs of blue.
The green grass.
The clear glass.
The falling leaves.
The the screaming seas.
Your always on my mind.
It feels like your changing things from wrong to right.
Sep 16, 2015
Sep 16, 2015 at 4:31 PM UTC
Im confused.
I can not allow myself to be happy,
To feel loved.
And when it is expressed to me,
I brush it off my shoulder.
As though it ment nothing.
And that's the problem.
It does mean something,
But im not sure what.
Maybe smiles,
Laughter,
Squinted eyes,
And rosy cheeks.
Those memories
And good feelings I give you,
You are now trying to express back to me.
But maybe you have different memories.
You do see the laughter and smiles,
But maybe a pretty girl,
With bright eyes
Appeared first.
A warm, cozy feeling wraps you,
As it did for me.
Or maybe you think nothing.
And these over analyzing of thoughts,
Leads me down a dark road.
A lonely memory,
An old way of life
Flashes back.
Dispare,
Awkwardness,
Shyness,
Agravation,
Self- loathing feelings
Raindown apon me.
So I can't think of the positve you see in me.
Even when you tell me to love you,
And show me with open arms
That it's okay,
I just can't.
I'm broken.
Maybe you can't see,
But I cannot accept-
The love that i so desperately want,
The friendship that I need to establish,
Affection,
Attention,
That I crave with every fiber of my being.
But I can't show it.
So I've built an invisible bulletproof wall.
You, my friend may not see it,
But I can tell you sense it's presence.
And that fact alone,
Kills me.
I so desparatley want to tear it down,
Too feel your warm presence,
But it's for your own good,
my own good.
Because if I show my friendship,
And express my love,
And give you everything I've been holding back
For so long,
...
It's simply too much.
Im too much for you to bare.
For anyone to bare.
So I'd rather go completely numb to the world,
Than loose sight of you.
And that is already in progress.
I know I'm just another,
But I'm different.
And thar's why I'm confused.
I train myself to think like everyone else,
But I have a different perspective.
So I keep my distance,
Which slowly breaks our bond,
Along with my weary heart.
But it 's for the best.
I'd rather be eased off into loneliness,
than having the whole world one day,
And loosing it the next.
Because that has happened.
And I can not go on if history repeat itself.
So here I sit.
In the corner,
Watching everyone dance to the music.
And then I think,
Maybe your confused too.
Feb 25, 2014
Feb 25, 2014 at 10:00 PM UTC
Running through the crystal rain
Stunning blues in two full brains
I took an unmarked train
to watch the skyline drain away
i have to say
if yesterday
is here to stay
i'll find a way
to be ok
This time
what was in my mind
left behind to find
after my eyes
were blind from cries
lay resting in depressions
of the body I call mine
this rind too kind
to be pressing in the lesson
i keep testing this thought so fine
my shadow was fined for the sigh that tried to hide
the sad know that the lines are signs that shine
too bright to see inside
and my death that's still hiding there
beats my breath and grows my hair
til what's left is budding bare
bursts like nighttime solar flares
and I don't care about my dispare
because it's me and it's only fair
because it sees what none will dare
because the key was always there
and it's the door that's out of place
i implore that it's not a race
so please take some space
to find your face
to see your grace
in the case left unlocked
just stop
Dec 20, 2010
Dec 20, 2010 at 12:17 PM UTC