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"andi" poems
Andi Balise combined a half page of a short story, “Thanks Going Without Saying” by Liz Balise, with half a page of an essay by Klee, “On Modern Art”, from a book called Modern Artists on Art, 10 Unabridged Essays, edited by Robert L. Herbert. With some small edits and line-breaks comes this miracle of a poem: Painting a Function Different I peek out over the railing of reality’s magic Beyond the porch-floor Minerva hangs her wash making the invisible visible Eighty two and three quarters deaf she doesn’t notice   But this is, in fact, reality Has always been this way— Bent and bird-like existence   Balanced on two twigs—always busy— Her task, is the *********** of space   Cutting coupons, crushing aluminum cans, ironing The three phenomena which I must.... Things no one notices— climbing on the abstract surface of a picture Switching the curtains   God! I wish from the infinity of space..she wouldn’t…! It figures that— Rusty, her cat, is weaving in fortune or misfortune   I try to fix them— Her ankles now And she curses at accidental quality from the corner of her mouth which has only one form Clothespin or cigarette?   Long johns and animals and men in heaven and bureau scarf and sheets—all, non-infinite deities surround us translucent, contained    I decide what to get for her birthday— We are good friends through painting a function different For me? Predestined necessity. Minerva? forgets her manners and eats like a survivor— Thanks going without saying.
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Oct 7, 2017
Oct 7, 2017 at 2:12 PM UTC
Painting a Function Different
Andi Balise combined a half page of a short story, “Thanks Going Without Saying” by Liz Balise, with half a page of an essay by Klee, “On Modern Art”, from a book called Modern Artists on Art, 10 Unabridged Essays, edited by Robert L. Herbert. With some small edits and line-breaks comes this miracle of a poem: Painting a Function Different I peek out over the railing of reality’s magic Beyond the porch-floor Minerva hangs her wash making the invisible visible Eighty two and three quarters deaf she doesn’t notice   But this is, in fact, reality Has always been this way— Bent and bird-like existence   Balanced on two twigs—always busy— Her task, is the *********** of space   Cutting coupons, crushing aluminum cans, ironing The three phenomena which I must.... Things no one notices— climbing on the abstract surface of a picture Switching the curtains   God! I wish from the infinity of space..she wouldn’t…! It figures that— Rusty, her cat, is weaving in fortune or misfortune   I try to fix them— Her ankles now And she curses at accidental quality from the corner of her mouth which has only one form Clothespin or cigarette?   Long johns and animals and men in heaven and bureau scarf and sheets—all, non-infinite deities surround us translucent, contained    I decide what to get for her birthday— We are good friends through painting a function different For me? Predestined necessity. Minerva? forgets her manners and eats like a survivor— Thanks going without saying.
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Ik gal kaha. Menu 2016 to hi yakeen ja ** gea c Ki thuhade lai menu bhulna bada easy c Bcz us time jado thuhade viah di gal chali c Tuci menu ik war bi nai c dasea Nd us bhenchod nu pyar kar bethe c tuci Yaar me kade kisi hor nu pyar nai kita, na hi kade kar paya. Beshak me hor bada kuj kita. Bhawe oh kudi baji c ya nasha. Par kisi hor nu kade pyar nai kr sakea. Menu sala ehi samj nai a reha Ki me thuhanu yaad karna band kr dawa Ya ewe hi yaad krda raha Me badi try kr reha ki yaad na kara. Par is baar gal kuj hor he 2016 wich me bhul gea c u nu But etki, gaand fati hoi a meri Bus ik mar nai sakda Baki bahro kush rehna penda Kini war dekh chukea me thuhanu lal rang de choore wich Sali iko dua nikdi ki maut a jawe menu Bcz me khud mar nai sakda *** bi ro reha Yaad a ik wari, jado apa park wicho di ja rahe c Te ik munda park wich ro reha c Te me us time Keha c ki sala Kinna pagal he Munda ewe kiwe ro sakda Aj oh munde di yaad andi menu Te meri kahi gal Aj samj anda ki sala rona ki hunda Bhen di lun hoi bi meri life di Sala kite bi dil nI lagda mera I know u nu mazak hi lag reha hona Ha me kita bi mazak hi c thuhade naal Te aj usdi saza bhugat reha ha Ena jyada tadap reha ha Pata ik ta banda ro ke mann halka kr lenda Ik banda andro ronda Jeda sala andro rona, te usda mann bi halka nai hunda Bada ikha hunda Fat jandi he Rooh kamb jandi he Sala jad bi kade wife nu patiala chad ke anda Ta sad song laganda. Badi myshkil naal sad song sunan nu milde Te bus sara rasta ronda anda me Sach kaha ohi ik time hunda jad me ro sakda ha te apna mann halka karda ha Cheeka marda ha, chest te mukke marda ha Thapad tak marda ha apne aap nu Sala sochda ki isi bahane kuch dil halka ** jawe Par kithe. Nai hunda. Heena jj, menu pata ki mera *** koi hak nai reha. Par metho ik haq na khona Oh thuhanu dekhan da. Me kade life wich interfair nai krda Bus menu dekhan to na rokna kade. Me tadfna chanda ha Rona chanda ha Apni galtia krke Ameen
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Jun 30, 2018
Jun 30, 2018 at 10:50 AM UTC
Tadpna
Ik gal kaha. Menu 2016 to hi yakeen ja ** gea c Ki thuhade lai menu bhulna bada easy c Bcz us time jado thuhade viah di gal chali c Tuci menu ik war bi nai c dasea Nd us bhenchod nu pyar kar bethe c tuci Yaar me kade kisi hor nu pyar nai kita, na hi kade kar paya. Beshak me hor bada kuj kita. Bhawe oh kudi baji c ya nasha. Par kisi hor nu kade pyar nai kr sakea. Menu sala ehi samj nai a reha Ki me thuhanu yaad karna band kr dawa Ya ewe hi yaad krda raha Me badi try kr reha ki yaad na kara. Par is baar gal kuj hor he 2016 wich me bhul gea c u nu But etki, gaand fati hoi a meri Bus ik mar nai sakda Baki bahro kush rehna penda Kini war dekh chukea me thuhanu lal rang de choore wich Sali iko dua nikdi ki maut a jawe menu Bcz me khud mar nai sakda *** bi ro reha Yaad a ik wari, jado apa park wicho di ja rahe c Te ik munda park wich ro reha c Te me us time Keha c ki sala Kinna pagal he Munda ewe kiwe ro sakda Aj oh munde di yaad andi menu Te meri kahi gal Aj samj anda ki sala rona ki hunda Bhen di lun hoi bi meri life di Sala kite bi dil nI lagda mera I know u nu mazak hi lag reha hona Ha me kita bi mazak hi c thuhade naal Te aj usdi saza bhugat reha ha Ena jyada tadap reha ha Pata ik ta banda ro ke mann halka kr lenda Ik banda andro ronda Jeda sala andro rona, te usda mann bi halka nai hunda Bada ikha hunda Fat jandi he Rooh kamb jandi he Sala jad bi kade wife nu patiala chad ke anda Ta sad song laganda. Badi myshkil naal sad song sunan nu milde Te bus sara rasta ronda anda me Sach kaha ohi ik time hunda jad me ro sakda ha te apna mann halka karda ha Cheeka marda ha, chest te mukke marda ha Thapad tak marda ha apne aap nu Sala sochda ki isi bahane kuch dil halka ** jawe Par kithe. Nai hunda. Heena jj, menu pata ki mera *** koi hak nai reha. Par metho ik haq na khona Oh thuhanu dekhan da. Me kade life wich interfair nai krda Bus menu dekhan to na rokna kade. Me tadfna chanda ha Rona chanda ha Apni galtia krke Ameen
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Snow plows beeping Reverse whine and scrape Swirling blizzard of waking—Strange in this place where boredom banks both snow and cold Are my eyes running? After all there's a stiff wind, and it’s 18 below.... Pictures and phone calls make up my family Stray cats eat suet I leave for the birds who make names for themselves in sunlit bushes Love these more than... my hearse of a job where that ice cream vat—slipped smashed my sodden dish-doin’ fingers    against     sink Pain mounts its insurrection! Ambushed! from every direction Fainting in steam Squeezing my eyes     till the blood shuts my brain-failing Down my wrist all over the front of this rubber apron.... Someone hates me somewhere Someone found me more tenacious than a road-kill skunk! I eat    I drink    I work    I sleep between these vicious icicles   -18F = -28 C
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Feb 10, 2017
Feb 10, 2017 at 3:55 PM UTC
Phoebe Will Call. Andi Will Write Letters
#       ***'You said,        "Someday I'm gonna break your heart",       the first time that we met--      Were you warning me..      ..or just seeing how close I'd get?'*** *If you didn't want to exist  in the heart of a man like me, then you shouldn't have allowed your scrapper little spirit       to write the way you do. And I was so naughty--  so very intentioned   in all of my obscenely-truthful lies.. I told you it was all your  fault         that you got in so quickly*          --and   it  was. *I got you back, though I knew it the moment you let on that you had fallen  deeply  in love..   not with me.. but with the love that had so deeply  fallen for every-thing about you And so,  it increased..  but at such a strange distance. But even then,  the years only perfected      and strengthened..    until lately..                         until lately..*      ***'We lay down in a lover's sigh      As a million years of time rolled by      How can I be hoping that it's not over yet?'***      I wasn't done, young Andi..      no..   no..   far from it You see.. there's this shame-thing I wanted to flood  with light. I'm getting so close  to finding the words      that have never been heard        in this world before     (And now.. and now.. and now..)      ***'I can't hold on to the night      Things change, ain't nothin' ever stays the same      You're gone as far as I can see      If you feel like letting go      Honey, I don't wanna be the last to know     ( I wanna hold on tight to the sweet memory         of you loving  me)'*** #
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May 7, 2023
May 7, 2023 at 8:31 PM UTC
Raggedy Andi
#       ***'You said,        "Someday I'm gonna break your heart",       the first time that we met--      Were you warning me..      ..or just seeing how close I'd get?'*** *If you didn't want to exist  in the heart of a man like me, then you shouldn't have allowed your scrapper little spirit       to write the way you do. And I was so naughty--  so very intentioned   in all of my obscenely-truthful lies.. I told you it was all your  fault         that you got in so quickly*          --and   it  was. *I got you back, though I knew it the moment you let on that you had fallen  deeply  in love..   not with me.. but with the love that had so deeply  fallen for every-thing about you And so,  it increased..  but at such a strange distance. But even then,  the years only perfected      and strengthened..    until lately..                         until lately..*      ***'We lay down in a lover's sigh      As a million years of time rolled by      How can I be hoping that it's not over yet?'***      I wasn't done, young Andi..      no..   no..   far from it You see.. there's this shame-thing I wanted to flood  with light. I'm getting so close  to finding the words      that have never been heard        in this world before     (And now.. and now.. and now..)      ***'I can't hold on to the night      Things change, ain't nothin' ever stays the same      You're gone as far as I can see      If you feel like letting go      Honey, I don't wanna be the last to know     ( I wanna hold on tight to the sweet memory         of you loving  me)'*** #
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i just wanna say i miss you but you can't talk to me i'm such a big problem in your life i wish i could just let you go but i cant, i cant just not talk to someone whom i love so ******* much! but i've made so many problems andi'm not even worth it i should just let it be like you did long ago...
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Sep 15, 2014
Sep 15, 2014 at 2:31 PM UTC
how can you let go so easily
( Knock, knock. ) Hey, can I come in? Hello, yes of course. Would you like any tea or water? No thanks. Ok. So how was your week? Fine, I suppose. Actually now that I think about 60/40 on the ****** scale. Explain. I don't know, I've been dating this girl for a while now and it doesn't feel like it's going anywhere. Andi? (Cough.) Yeah. Hmm, I thought things were going well with her. Can you explain your feelings a little bit more? I guess I'm feeling like she likes me, just not enough. What do mean not enough? I mean she likes me but it feels like i'm just somebody to occupy her time until finds someone who is what she really wants. And I'm not sure if she's what I want either... I don't know. Hmm, that sounds frustrating. Are you sure your not just misreading her? I mean, everybody has a different dating style. That could be that i'm just reading into it too much but she's kinda flakey and if you ask me, thats a good way to tell how much they like someone. Not always, but I understand how you feel. Maybe you should consider asking her how she feels? I don't think I'm at that point yet. The thing is, sometimes we have a lot fun. I guess i'm just confused. Dating is hard. It takes a lot of courage. I suppose. I just want to find someone that makes me as good as willa used to. I know, but I don't think it does you any good to focus your past relationships. Yeah... I know. Can we talk about something else? End
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Sep 11, 2013
Sep 11, 2013 at 1:48 AM UTC
Conversations with my therapist #2
so guess what, one day I found a key (to a closet (in the church.)) and it was very dark and dusty in there & the ladder nailed to the wall was only wide enough for one foot at-a time, so, it’s lucky that I’m skinny enough to wri-i-iggle my shoulders up and through the hole in the closet’s web-trailing ceiling. I clambered up there and into this black forest. Plants were sprouting up in big rills and clumps-- stalks thin as my finger and pipes wider than my waist, some fading up into the ceiling’s darkness... others squatting low, and glaring up at me with One. black. eye. they were all deathly still. Then, the creaking boards, the black forest, the cramped path of unmarked dust that winds between the pipes, all that just SIGHED and VIBRATED, and with a hisssing hoarsse !shhhhhhhh... breathed! and my heart just stops!!! BAM! {cricket} and i feel ****** into a dark mouth! i am caught and trapped by this black closet’s maw andI’mwaitingfor Godknowswhat tocomewrigglingfromthepipes-- ! --! and then guess what?: !b’URsting up its throat is a SONG! slowlyand Suddenly, a blaring, screaming, golden !EAgle of a chord that s(oa)rs and c’RASHES into anotherand another one all rising and falling, champing at the bit until One Thousand hhums and shhivers fill each pipe. and it feels like holding ten coins in a stack and making them jump-clink-clickity-HOP together-- oh, it feels like pushing your fingertips into a bucket of cold paint it feels like the moment after jumping off of a tall tree it feels like un-rippling your braided hair with both hands like a songbird’s claws curling about your finger, like closing your eyes in a hot summer-sun and falling asleep in a hammock it feels like holding a blacksnake that curls and struggles strong against your wrists, that’s what this church ***** feels like. I’m gonna **** the genius that started playing while I was in there.
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Apr 25, 2013
Apr 25, 2013 at 10:47 PM UTC
The Closet (a scary story)
so guess what, one day I found a key (to a closet (in the church.)) and it was very dark and dusty in there & the ladder nailed to the wall was only wide enough for one foot at-a time, so, it’s lucky that I’m skinny enough to wri-i-iggle my shoulders up and through the hole in the closet’s web-trailing ceiling. I clambered up there and into this black forest. Plants were sprouting up in big rills and clumps-- stalks thin as my finger and pipes wider than my waist, some fading up into the ceiling’s darkness... others squatting low, and glaring up at me with One. black. eye. they were all deathly still. Then, the creaking boards, the black forest, the cramped path of unmarked dust that winds between the pipes, all that just SIGHED and VIBRATED, and with a hisssing hoarsse !shhhhhhhh... breathed! and my heart just stops!!! BAM! {cricket} and i feel ****** into a dark mouth! i am caught and trapped by this black closet’s maw andI’mwaitingfor Godknowswhat tocomewrigglingfromthepipes-- ! --! and then guess what?: !b’URsting up its throat is a SONG! slowlyand Suddenly, a blaring, screaming, golden !EAgle of a chord that s(oa)rs and c’RASHES into anotherand another one all rising and falling, champing at the bit until One Thousand hhums and shhivers fill each pipe. and it feels like holding ten coins in a stack and making them jump-clink-clickity-HOP together-- oh, it feels like pushing your fingertips into a bucket of cold paint it feels like the moment after jumping off of a tall tree it feels like un-rippling your braided hair with both hands like a songbird’s claws curling about your finger, like closing your eyes in a hot summer-sun and falling asleep in a hammock it feels like holding a blacksnake that curls and struggles strong against your wrists, that’s what this church ***** feels like. I’m gonna **** the genius that started playing while I was in there.
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i don't know what it's like to not have a dad to wake up every morning to feel as if something's missing some part of your life some distant memories of a man you called daddy and your mommy called love only to one day disappear and be someone else's love and someone else's daddy i don't know what it's like to be you but i know i'd do anything to make you smile and make you feel loved i know that one day you'll look back on life with bright eyes for the future you are capable you are not y o u r p a s t this is only temporary smile because the world is so big and there's so much you haven't learned yet one day you'll be someone's princess ANDI'LLKNOWIWATCHEDYOUGROWUP please don't forget me if i'm living i'm living for you i don't need to be another person in your life that left you're so young so pure DONTFORGETWHOYOUARE BEYOURSELF BELIEVEINYOURSELFTOO I W I LL ALWAYS BE HERE FOR YOU call me anytime
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Jul 30, 2014
Jul 30, 2014 at 2:01 AM UTC
ONE DAY YOU'LL GROW UP
She takes creamand I sugarwe lie in dreamsof can we? could ya?but outside in the midnight cloudshe's all I ever wantedwe take long walks with the dogchrist, she exhausts me-we're down lanes and up hillsand when I catch her at the topeach kiss seems to change herI don't know this womanwe are just so intimate,I'd love to see into her heartbut maybe I already did andI'm just too dumb to tell wood from treesI know it hurts when she's not thereI have cream, and all this sugarand those dreams I mentioned?Get outta' here-I'd never dare tell her about all that.
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Feb 23, 2010
Feb 23, 2010 at 12:44 PM UTC
She Cream, Me Sugar
I feel too much; emotionally/mentally I'm constantly thinking about nothing and everything all at once Why was I born with this blessing? Why was I born with this curse? Why am I like this? I feel feelings that don't exist and I fall in love with everything and I'm constantly breaking my own heart I feel like no one understands me andI don't know how I should Feel about that I just have all these thoughts and emotions inside of me That I can only release onto paper and It makes me feel alone and trapped and Yet I push away everyone in my life So they don't see this beautiful mess I've created Of both happiness and sadness I'm still trying to solve myself Because I'm a Mystery
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Jul 27, 2015
Jul 27, 2015 at 7:13 PM UTC
July 27th '15 // Thought Consumption
*** tak ta tuci pregnant bi ** gaye hone thuhanu kuj ni pata ehna thoughts naal kini fatdi he dil daily karda he ki thuhdae office de samne aawa te ake dekha u nu but control kr lenda ha kisi na kisi tarah daily raat nu 2 mint kharar bus stand te ruk ke janda ha, ki thuhade ghar wal nu jawa ya na jawa. dil ena krda ki shyad chatt te tuci khade howe te me dekh lawa but fer dimag kenda chad rehn de dilla. kyu tang krna us nu oh kushi kushi apni life spend kr rahi he ta usdi life kyu spoil krni Yaar I want to see you. fati hoi a meri thuhanu bilkul bi fikar ni andi? ki kiwe reh reha hona me? daily ronda ha daily yaad andi he thuhadi. But serioulsy u r stone heart kash me bi ban jawa dubara ewe da pehla changa bhalwa ban gea c jado jalandhar to bad breakup hoea c *** sala pata nai ki ** gea us time bi 6-8 months lagge c recovery lai but is time sala ** hi nai reha menu bi dasdo ewe da ki kara me ki bhul jawa u nu jiwe tuci bhul gaye @@ ! ! ! !
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Aug 2, 2018
Aug 2, 2018 at 2:10 AM UTC
Untitled
I don’t believe in a god But I have faith that she can make the sun shine brighter when it’s tangled in her hair She is inexplicable I don’t know if she exists because evolution isn’t perfect and God doesn’t happen She shouldn’t be happening But those are her fingers and her palms I could memorize every line And rewrite every vein in her body because our hearts don’t beat together and I try not to look at her that way But it still happens andI have to catch myself from falling for her
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Oct 16, 2014
Oct 16, 2014 at 8:02 PM UTC
A Slightly Hypothetical Love Poem
I. Hides beneath A Bench billboard; Andi Manzano's Bogus whitening cream Shadowing a River of tar— Sawdust dancing along an Ailing surface of Black film. Quiet, perhaps even Serene. But very much Sick And gray And dark. II. At the heart of the river Is a lone Brown woman With Gloved hands and Old, wooden net. Fishing under the heat of The sun.
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May 12, 2014
May 12, 2014 at 11:09 AM UTC
Hope:
she's wearing a sun hat my shirt her favorite pair of ******* she's dancing around the room frank ocean singing to her out of the speakers on her laptop everything frank ocean says she sings back to me with every word she says and every step she takes around the room i fall more and more in love with the beauty of who she is when she's herself, the beautiful girl dancing around the room in a sun hat and my shirt and her favorite *******
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Aug 26, 2015
Aug 26, 2015 at 6:38 PM UTC
andi
violent You are like a biggest sound cloyingly honeyed on my mound of massed and singing chords (you are a rose most thorned and beautiful i clutch idiosyncratically strangled scarlet petals bursting a foal i;ve nursed with tremoring pits of bold gangling and accurate stench violent you're a tedium a lush and decaying growth so lightly cancering my cell and I breath your daily blood and i whimper first glowering fist my hand to take that penitent shape and i"ll whisper it to their chins: they who art most a mortal folly as to wade in my quaking presence andi ' ;ll sleeep them quickly rushing rushing oBliviOn)
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Dec 9, 2010
Dec 9, 2010 at 11:00 AM UTC
Untitled
I sit there like a balloon, fit to burst, and no one even turns their head. I've been pushed, and pushed, and pushed and pushed andI'mjustsogoddamntiredofitallandIjustwanttoscream. How can they not have noticed? I mean, it's not like I'm trying to hide it, I'm long past that. Do I really mean that little to them that they never noticed me before? Have I always looked as depressed on the outside as I am on the inside? I know they care - I know they do. I just need them to notice me for once. notice me when I need them most. I don't know what will set me off, or how explosive I'll be when it does; Once I start, I'm never really sure that I can stop. Will it be the picture of upset, my hands linked behind my head, legs drawn close, unable to stop the tears from spilling out of my painfully red eyes - uncontrollable sadness. Or will it be screaming anxiety, my claws finding their usual tearing spots in my scalp, my body trembling with the effort of not screaming at the top of my lungs and falling to literal pieces on the polished floors. Or will it be like last-time; small, silent self-pitying. unnoticeable. The kind that come out of no-where and takes you by surprise, that you cant do anything about or someone will see, the kind that you hide with your hands whilst pretending that you're getting on with your work and not wishing that you were dead. you never know with me - it's just one of the many flaws of my mind. so please - please - just notice me now.
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Nov 12, 2017
Nov 12, 2017 at 12:03 PM UTC
Notice me.
My life for your life I'd rather die for you Than live without you
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Mar 9, 2014
Mar 9, 2014 at 1:31 AM UTC
Words for Andi
MY VIEW OF ANIMAL CIRCUSES YA SEE I AM IN FAVOUR OF ANIMAL CIRCUSES CAUSE IF THE ANIMAL IS TREATED OK, I AM FINE WITH IT THESE WEIRD ANIMAL LIBERATIONISTS, NEED TO BE TAUGHT HOW TO HAVE FUN, CAUSE, IN ZOOS THE ANIMALS ARE IN CAGES AND IN HORSE RACING ANIMALS ARE IN CAGES AND AS LONG AS THERE ISN’T ANY HUMAN DOING HARM TO ANIMALS IN CAGES WE SHOULD ALLOW IT IN CANBERRA CAUSE IN MY PREVIOUS LIFE AS ALBERT TOPSY WAKDRON, I TAMED A LION ANDI WORE A SKIRT, YEAH A MAN WEARING A SKIRT NOWADAYS PEOPLE ARE TOO SCARED TO PLAY DRESSUPS BECAUSE, THEY ARE TOO WORRIED ABOUT PEOPLE WHO TEASE TEASE ME, TEASING NOTHING, BUT I LIKE PLAYING DRESSUPS FOR YOUTUBE YA SEE I REMEMBER DRESSING UP IN A SKIRT TAMING A LION THAT IS FUN, AND ANIMAL LIBERATIONISTS NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT NOT EVERYONE WHO LIKES ANIMAL CIRCUSES ARE BAD PEOPLE THEY DO CARE, THEY DO CARE THEY DO CARE I DRESS UP AS A GIRL AND YEAH, I WHIP THEM LIKE YOU WHIP HORSES I HAVE NO IDEA, BUT IT’S A TAD HYPOCRITICAL CAUSE I NEVER WHIPPED A LION, I TAMED A LION AS TOPSY WALDRON IN MY PREVIOUS LIFE I AM AN OLD TIMER TO THESE ANIMAL LIBERATIONISTS CAUSE, I NEVER LET THE WHIP HIT THE ANIMAL I AGREE WITH ANIMAL CIRCUSES, CAUSE THEY DON’T HARM THE ANIMALS CALL ME A BIG GIRL, BUT I WANNA BRING BACK MY TOPSY, WALDRON CHARACTER TO SHOW I AM IN FAVOUR OF ANIMAL ENTERTAINMENT LIKE SOME ANIMALS COULD BE OLD TIME ENTERTAINERS CHARLIE CHAPLIN IS PROBABLY NOW AN ANIMAL I AM A BUDDHIST ENTERTAINER WRITER AND ARTIST, WITH A LOVE FOR YOUTUBE AND A LOVE FOR CLEANCUT ANIMAL ENTERTAINMENT THINK OF PREVIOUS LIVES, YOUTUBE CLEARLY STATES THAT SOME ANIMALS LIKE THE ATTENTION THEY GET MY LION I TAMED, I KNOW HE DID
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Jan 6, 2015
Jan 6, 2015 at 4:52 PM UTC
MY VIEW ON ANIMAL CIRCUSES
MY VIEW OF ANIMAL CIRCUSES YA SEE I AM IN FAVOUR OF ANIMAL CIRCUSES CAUSE IF THE ANIMAL IS TREATED OK, I AM FINE WITH IT THESE WEIRD ANIMAL LIBERATIONISTS, NEED TO BE TAUGHT HOW TO HAVE FUN, CAUSE, IN ZOOS THE ANIMALS ARE IN CAGES AND IN HORSE RACING ANIMALS ARE IN CAGES AND AS LONG AS THERE ISN’T ANY HUMAN DOING HARM TO ANIMALS IN CAGES WE SHOULD ALLOW IT IN CANBERRA CAUSE IN MY PREVIOUS LIFE AS ALBERT TOPSY WAKDRON, I TAMED A LION ANDI WORE A SKIRT, YEAH A MAN WEARING A SKIRT NOWADAYS PEOPLE ARE TOO SCARED TO PLAY DRESSUPS BECAUSE, THEY ARE TOO WORRIED ABOUT PEOPLE WHO TEASE TEASE ME, TEASING NOTHING, BUT I LIKE PLAYING DRESSUPS FOR YOUTUBE YA SEE I REMEMBER DRESSING UP IN A SKIRT TAMING A LION THAT IS FUN, AND ANIMAL LIBERATIONISTS NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT NOT EVERYONE WHO LIKES ANIMAL CIRCUSES ARE BAD PEOPLE THEY DO CARE, THEY DO CARE THEY DO CARE I DRESS UP AS A GIRL AND YEAH, I WHIP THEM LIKE YOU WHIP HORSES I HAVE NO IDEA, BUT IT’S A TAD HYPOCRITICAL CAUSE I NEVER WHIPPED A LION, I TAMED A LION AS TOPSY WALDRON IN MY PREVIOUS LIFE I AM AN OLD TIMER TO THESE ANIMAL LIBERATIONISTS CAUSE, I NEVER LET THE WHIP HIT THE ANIMAL I AGREE WITH ANIMAL CIRCUSES, CAUSE THEY DON’T HARM THE ANIMALS CALL ME A BIG GIRL, BUT I WANNA BRING BACK MY TOPSY, WALDRON CHARACTER TO SHOW I AM IN FAVOUR OF ANIMAL ENTERTAINMENT LIKE SOME ANIMALS COULD BE OLD TIME ENTERTAINERS CHARLIE CHAPLIN IS PROBABLY NOW AN ANIMAL I AM A BUDDHIST ENTERTAINER WRITER AND ARTIST, WITH A LOVE FOR YOUTUBE AND A LOVE FOR CLEANCUT ANIMAL ENTERTAINMENT THINK OF PREVIOUS LIVES, YOUTUBE CLEARLY STATES THAT SOME ANIMALS LIKE THE ATTENTION THEY GET MY LION I TAMED, I KNOW HE DID
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My dear love, in you andI there is more than just a boy and a girl There are lovers who love more than they are loved, and souls who see what is not visible. I am loved, as are you, and together we see that.
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Oct 12, 2016
Oct 12, 2016 at 10:26 AM UTC
My Dear Love
**I found myself rocking on the floor again today But I don't know how I got down there or how I felt so calm. As you screamed at me trapped in the bathroom I felt a smile slowly creep on my face As I imagined myself taking my razor out of my pocket and using it to slice your face open. It looked so beautiful covered in blood With your jaw hanging open And hearing you scream at me to stop. I did like you for a while When you cried it made me feel better because now you can know how it feels to constantly be in agony Writhing and clenching your stomach Coughing blood Every. Single. NIGHT!!!!! And as your voice got louder and louder I began to laugh Because your anger was so intriguing. When you threaten to **** me It gets me so high I feel like a kid on Christmas day. Im not suicidal but if you put the gun to my head I'll do whatever I can to get You to pull the trigger If you held a knife to my throat I'd step just a little closer to feel the Stony ice blade against my already freezing skin. I'm psychotic mommy I can feel it deep inside. I can feel it in the clouds And see the tent in the sky.... The tent.... It makes me think of him Andi stop laughing for the tender spot that hinders... The roses start to wither And the air gets thicker... I breathe in blood and I noticed I've sliced my throat But I feel fine I feel bliss. If I were a god just for a day If I had the power to just pick off people one by one Or take them by the plenty... Whisk them off of this filthy Filthy ******* ******** you** Call a ******* earth. I'm so pathetic. So pathetic!!!!!! IM A HORRIBLE ******* ***** Mommy???? Mommy?? Why do you lock my bedroom door at night when I'm sleeping? I said I was sorry And I never wanted to hurt you again. You said Daddy died but why is he standing above you?? Mommy please don't go. I'll try to be a better child. Why do you hate me?? YOU STUPIDFUCKING ***** ANSWER ME!!!! I love you..
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Jun 14, 2016
Jun 14, 2016 at 1:17 PM UTC
~The Tick @9:26~
**I found myself rocking on the floor again today But I don't know how I got down there or how I felt so calm. As you screamed at me trapped in the bathroom I felt a smile slowly creep on my face As I imagined myself taking my razor out of my pocket and using it to slice your face open. It looked so beautiful covered in blood With your jaw hanging open And hearing you scream at me to stop. I did like you for a while When you cried it made me feel better because now you can know how it feels to constantly be in agony Writhing and clenching your stomach Coughing blood Every. Single. NIGHT!!!!! And as your voice got louder and louder I began to laugh Because your anger was so intriguing. When you threaten to **** me It gets me so high I feel like a kid on Christmas day. Im not suicidal but if you put the gun to my head I'll do whatever I can to get You to pull the trigger If you held a knife to my throat I'd step just a little closer to feel the Stony ice blade against my already freezing skin. I'm psychotic mommy I can feel it deep inside. I can feel it in the clouds And see the tent in the sky.... The tent.... It makes me think of him Andi stop laughing for the tender spot that hinders... The roses start to wither And the air gets thicker... I breathe in blood and I noticed I've sliced my throat But I feel fine I feel bliss. If I were a god just for a day If I had the power to just pick off people one by one Or take them by the plenty... Whisk them off of this filthy Filthy ******* ******** you** Call a ******* earth. I'm so pathetic. So pathetic!!!!!! IM A HORRIBLE ******* ***** Mommy???? Mommy?? Why do you lock my bedroom door at night when I'm sleeping? I said I was sorry And I never wanted to hurt you again. You said Daddy died but why is he standing above you?? Mommy please don't go. I'll try to be a better child. Why do you hate me?? YOU STUPIDFUCKING ***** ANSWER ME!!!! I love you..
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57
I think of you three daily My heart aches to say hi I'm sorry Whish I could be your mom again Tears flow like a waterfall I'm sorry Please forgive me Please call Keep living your amazing Andi love you three
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Oct 9, 2014
Oct 9, 2014 at 12:03 PM UTC
missing you
wash it wash out wash it wash out let it turn hoot and a holler bottled up all day and like bubbly bottles burst take my toll fierce, almost fictional but never hostile transcend your barriers and let your impulses take you towards the next side of the room and then back again its over and over and over hear the trumpet whail its sorrow circling, round, round, round love, a mist, love to die for unseen unconditionl surrender ooohohohoaoh e,njoy a gin and tonic, and ,dress that ,was fash,ionable at ,som, e point b,ut is in deeper,ate ne,ed of ,recur ,,, , , , rence the glasses are thick and so is t he smoke that lingers above conv,eras,--------tions and weaves be d,, tween the textu--------res of the deep green trees and their abundant philosophical relatab======le language and you fall into their ro000000000ots, you drUUUUUug their holes and youuuuuu lOOOOOve the earth the same way you love a compliment Ahhh yeahhh!!!,you're looking the best you have in your life there is a melody somewhere in the background but your attention is on the person in from of you, the enthusiasm in their voice, and how quickly you are able to agree with them anticipate like disneyt, tpoets businesses, bartenders, bar menders, cleansers inspectors interpreters judgmenters allocate the spenders reaching out for new vendeor whose the best the lesser?? LET ME GOOOOOOOOO its warm man, you have a smoke? swomen, lights, some monument sky high lithe buddah lights little u[p with orange with luck on straight spinnings what was that? take another drink, hey whats your name? I'm from california you like surfing politics I odn'tk know I need to meet my friend fix fix fix do I need to finish that paper? fixixixifiixx what will my mother say???? you met another guy who is dancing with a girl and he is cool and he is gesturing towards you with his glass of champagne and you tilt up ystaree he cbottole of beer, but his kindness lingers as you stare into your glass andI smile when? wrong time go away fog forward gly He cracks a really funny joke about your smile HAHAHHAHAAH The movie, the movie, those time when I am removed from things and the My mind balloons and its... delicious
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Jan 24, 2015
Jan 24, 2015 at 6:27 PM UTC
That one night.......______ YEYAHHHHHHH
wash it wash out wash it wash out let it turn hoot and a holler bottled up all day and like bubbly bottles burst take my toll fierce, almost fictional but never hostile transcend your barriers and let your impulses take you towards the next side of the room and then back again its over and over and over hear the trumpet whail its sorrow circling, round, round, round love, a mist, love to die for unseen unconditionl surrender ooohohohoaoh e,njoy a gin and tonic, and ,dress that ,was fash,ionable at ,som, e point b,ut is in deeper,ate ne,ed of ,recur ,,, , , , rence the glasses are thick and so is t he smoke that lingers above conv,eras,--------tions and weaves be d,, tween the textu--------res of the deep green trees and their abundant philosophical relatab======le language and you fall into their ro000000000ots, you drUUUUUug their holes and youuuuuu lOOOOOve the earth the same way you love a compliment Ahhh yeahhh!!!,you're looking the best you have in your life there is a melody somewhere in the background but your attention is on the person in from of you, the enthusiasm in their voice, and how quickly you are able to agree with them anticipate like disneyt, tpoets businesses, bartenders, bar menders, cleansers inspectors interpreters judgmenters allocate the spenders reaching out for new vendeor whose the best the lesser?? LET ME GOOOOOOOOO its warm man, you have a smoke? swomen, lights, some monument sky high lithe buddah lights little u[p with orange with luck on straight spinnings what was that? take another drink, hey whats your name? I'm from california you like surfing politics I odn'tk know I need to meet my friend fix fix fix do I need to finish that paper? fixixixifiixx what will my mother say???? you met another guy who is dancing with a girl and he is cool and he is gesturing towards you with his glass of champagne and you tilt up ystaree he cbottole of beer, but his kindness lingers as you stare into your glass andI smile when? wrong time go away fog forward gly He cracks a really funny joke about your smile HAHAHHAHAAH The movie, the movie, those time when I am removed from things and the My mind balloons and its... delicious
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I know ki bada kuj change ** gea he thuhadi life wich *** mere lai thuhadi life wich koi jagah nai he heena ji par is baar kuj alag he apna breakup pehla bi hoea kai baar hoea viah thuhda pehla bi fix hoea c us time ena nai c feel hoea jina is baar ** reha fati pai he meri paralysis da attack tak hoea thuhade viah to agle din 4 din hospital admit reha ha meri kidney ne kam band kr dita c over drinking krke. me kade drink ni kiti but is baar kiti rajj ke drink kiti heena me lakh bura ha par pata ni is baar bahut kuj alag he daily ro reha ha raat 2 nu waje son reha ha bcz u r coming in my thoughts te neend nai andi swere 4 waje akh khu jandi he te bcz u di yaad a jandi i know ki *** kuj ni ** sakda bcz me kita bura u naal par pachta reha ha mar reha ha maut bi nai a rahi menu sali kiwe seh paunga eh dukh sari jindagi samj ni anda sala
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Mar 9, 2018
Mar 9, 2018 at 3:13 AM UTC
Untitled
the sun burned my eyes andi dug my head into my pillow my socks almost fell off and my shirt twisted around my body the hair that rested upon my head was messy as hell, i hopped out of bed and saw the snow melting as i drank my coffee i felt cool down my body i thought to myself as i drank it "what a **** lovely day!" walked out with a smile and lost my head in the clouds and fell in love with thoughts of what i'll be doing for the rest of the day Came back home and hopped on my bed the sun was out and the moon came on and i thought to myself "what a **** lovely day today!" and fell asleep with the foggy air
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Nov 9, 2013
Nov 9, 2013 at 9:14 PM UTC
Coffee thought
the words are allpilingupagain I andi'm not sure he understands how much talking saved me from myself but he stopped and now the words are everywhere, in my chest and in my hair anddrainingfrom my fingertips, with no where else to go and they never leave through tears, the thing that leaves the most
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Apr 17, 2013
Apr 17, 2013 at 8:25 PM UTC
Implode but never show.