Why create me?
Do you love me
or hate me.
Whats the purpose?
I feel fckng worthless.
Why so serious?
This addiction has me feeling delirious.
This seems so wrong
For I don't belong
Hopeless traveler
Ruthless scavenger
Lonely warrior
Fruitful courier
Im at the end
cant comprehend
im a fake
i pretend
to be a man
just a phony
faux
spec of dust
grain of sand.
But yet....
i understand.

Close eyes,
deep breath
Sweaty palms,
expanded chest
Racing thoughts,
desperate to move on  
Rugged past
that is contiuously touched upon  

You see im stuck
Or maybe out of luck
I can see the beauty in the distance
Yet there's a trend of "I missed it"
Happiness is one more step foward
However, the threshold has lowered
Hanging on to this feeling to explore
Running to the idea that I can reach that door
Drop my suitcase of memories
Befriend my dishonorable enemies
Escape the sinking quicksand
Grab on to your helping hand

The more you struggle
the more you sink

Its sad that its even difficult
for me to think
Think clearly
sooooooo cloudy
My visionss aaarrrreee soo clllooudyy

yuor lllossinnggnn cotnrolll  
DONT LET IT TAKE YOU
you can make it
be strong  
you need to go
before your gone  
Run with this and fight
The more you think its wrong
the more youll understand its right  
chase the stars you analyze at night
they are beautiful
and so are you
Deep inside you've always stayed true
Please, I beg
One more try
You need to understanding living
Before you die

A strange sensation crawls beneath my skin, it's not something I've known before.
A claustrophobia that equates to a 1 by 1 concrete box. No windows.
A paranoia as vicious as a horror-movie induced glance around a familiar room.

Fire-breathing dragons soar through my nights, setting ablaze our days.
Our perfect, storybook romance, too perfect.

Flesh wounds that never healed.
Septic bandages tight around my ears.

Imprisoning his poison dripping words inside my head, like the parasitic maggot he was, they bore deeper into my sanity.

His monsters in my head won't let you in. Their screams drown out the reality of your safety.

How I feel is on the tip of my tongue, cowering behind heaving ribs.
Vulnerable.

I watched a rarity across the street,
Walking like an endangered species
On his way to school, alone.
Don't his parents realize,
As ours did,
That single men live on his way,
Looking out windows
With coffee and cigarette;
Married couples are household occupied,
Labourers, professionals and unemployed
Are behind closed, locked doors,
Busily preparing for another day.
Cars drive by, one slows behind him,
To ensure her carrier pigeon fledges along.
The lad in question pays no attention,
Playing catch-up with his shadow.

lately it feels like i'm not real
all i am is a set of sleepy eyes and an airy mind
spectating and thinking
my body floats when i walk
the only thing weighing me down are my thoughts
i hold the flame up to my bony wrist
sear my skin
leave a rusty mark
that reminds me of how
i can't feel anything anymore

It's built to last, it's built to last!
Built to stand against the years.
Built to hide us with ourselves,
Against the wreck of all our fears.

Who built it we no longer know.
Who made the walls so tall and grey?
To keep us safe, to keep 'them' out,
Though who remembers who is 'they'?

We shall not leave it; we must not!
For terrors surely lie in wait
To catch us when we drop our guard.
We must not venture past the gate!

No prisons built by foreign hands
Will keep our children or our wives.
For in our fortress they are safe
To live protected, watchful lives.