i'm barely even a teen
you can't expect me to fall
that isn't fair
i know most people assume
only the damaged and broken
keep themselves
from falling
but they aren't the only ones
because i'm here
and i'm neither
but i refuse to fall
maybe i'm scared
of welcoming something
foreign that not even my mother can make me understand
love cannot be taught, is what i'm told
maybe i just don't want to have something just to lose it

For two years hands were held and lips were pressed together.
For two years we held hands and held eachothers hearts.
For two years I was there for you every hour of the day and night.
For two years we were best friends, boyfriends, inseparable.
For two years all I gave you was love.
For two years all you did was play me and sleep with others behind my back.
For two years I wasted my time loving someone who was incapable of loving me.

I'm sorry,
i can't love you.
i'm sorry,
you never said something sooner.
i'm sorry,
but this isn't going to work.
i'm sorry,
but we are not for each other.
i'm sorry,
i don't long to talk to you.
i'm sorry,
i find your swearing so unattractive.
i'm sorry,
i hope you find someone else.
i'm sorry,
but what i have to give is not for you.
i'm sorry,
i don't want to share it with you.
i'm sorry,
but i'll help you along the way.
i'm sorry,
for you & your sad life.

breathe
breathe
you just have to breathe
its simple, even babies can do it
so why cant you?
a string tightens around your neck
heart racing,
breath scarce
you dart your hands up
to reieve the pain
yet, where is the rope?
there is none
for it is your own mind
tightening your hair round your neck
yet your hair is draped across your shoulders
not a piece misplaced
your throat on fire
spine tingling
head spinning
trying to just
breathe

open your mouth
call for help
and water spills in
yet your nowhere near water
your mind, its playing even more games
your mind is an assassin
plotting against you
trying to **** you
you let your hands rest
the fingers far beyond numb
and the worst happens:
someone sees you, drowning in air
comes up to you
asks the three words you dread the most
"are you okay?"

you swallow, seeing stars
faintly shake your head
eyes fuzzy, in and out of focus
but somehow
as your hair tightens its grip
and the water trickles into your lungs
you mutter, stutter
"i'm fine" and mannage
with blue lips
purple skin
and red, tear filled eyes
to give a smile
full toothed
praying for this to convince them
that you infact are
even though your drowning

the person nods, patting a shoulder
flashing a smile
and moves on
so you can drown in peace
struggling to breathe
your lungs full of water
throat on fire
tighter than ever
you can feel your hands now
you look down and see your shaking
hands clenched
knuckles white
palms bleeding
but you keep your head up
smile on
your pretty purple face
beautiful blue lips in all
and keep walking
as you turn from dying to dead
a walking corpse.

I have a crush on someone I know.
He’s been a friend for 4 years, I guess.
I never thought that I’d ever like him
‘cause he’s bossy and snob,
and is always frowning.
But I’ve seen him smile and I got to like him,
I heard him speak and I think I’m in love. Err.
This actually feels weird, awkward and crazy
but gee, I feel giddy each time that I see him.
He wears a pair of glasses, into his ears,
I think it’s a shade of silver..
He likes to joke, to tickle and cackle.
Oh, how I wish that one day he’ll know
I have a crush on someone like him.

Who needs a relationship when you can have
*SUSHI