if i don’t think about it,
did it happen?
if i don’t mention it,
is it real?
if i shut it out,
does it still live?

I see you everyday
I can hear my heart beat fast
I can tell i'm smiling when I saw you
I can tell when I feel hurt because your with her
I blush red when your near
I lought when your name pops up
I wish you saw how I felt about you
I wish you...could see that we could be more then friends
But your with her
And you look happy
You look like she is everyhting
You look at her, like she is the only thing in the world
Like it's just you and her and no one else
Maybe that could be me and you
But.....You blong with her
And I know that
She is everything
That I will never be

we humans have such a need to be loved
afraid of being
alone
abandoned
left for granted

and i am no different
i want to feel the rush
butterflies in my stomach
wing against my hair
hands against his heart
heart intertwined with my soul

you may ask why
am i so enamoured with this
idea of love

perhaps it is so i do not feel lonely
for i have been (lonely) for a while now
even when i am surrounded by people
there is no one
not really
not anyone who connects with my soul

or perhaps  i just want to feel more put together
after all
everyone thinks you’re so much happier when you have a significant other

or perhaps i just want someone to hold hands with
someone to kiss
embrace
****

oh
ah
oh
i’m not fooling anyone, am i?
the reason i am so enamoured with the idea of love
is because i am obsessed with the notion that someone else can fix me up
heal the void in my heart
clear the window to my soul

If ever you happen to lose your faith
Look to fate
Like love at first sight
Or the miracle of life
To rejuvenate
If ever you happen to lose your way
Then close your eyes
And let your heart guide
You through life’s maze
If ever you happen to need a friend
Turn to someone willing to lend
A shoulder...a ear......a hand
To help you through your circumstance
It takes a lot of pride to do it yourself
But even more in courage to ask for help
And a bigger person to lend yourself
Regardless of whether we help
Or are being helped
Because the perseverance of life
Is the greatest accumulation of wealth

- Diangelo Tyler

I ignored the universe
when it
showered me with signs
over and over

I changed paths
took detours
redrew a map

But at the end of it all
looks up
Hi.
Again.

we have been taught
to color inside the lines
since we were little kids,

so explain to me how do we
continue to stay inside the lines
when life is everything but that.

no wonder we always
find ourselves
close to the edge,

but never really willing to cross
because we fear what would happen
if we did what they told us not to.
-*CPM