so we keep on searching..

It cost her heart.
Revised old poem.

Between stupid and stuck.

Will you walk towards me??

That one stare and you know that there is an instant connection..

Raw. First draft. I don't know where it should go.. i just feel the urge to write this.

Only you will understand.

I had my second hike last Saturday. And yes, it was so fulfilling. Nature is so stunning, breathtaking. God is the true creator.

Now you go please.
Wednesday night musing.

youre in cloudnine
so happy that you wouldn't want to lose it
then suddenly it's suffocating
so you asked for a little space
then you became so accustomed to the space
so now you told me to go
and leave you in your **** spacious world

for Lola, now my angel
.
So far, it was the longest days I’ve stayed (home) since you were gone. I guess I have to get used to you being ‘gone’. And when I say “gone” it’s not just being physically absent. It’s not just some word for the emptiness. It’s not just the vacuum.
.
‘Gone’ is the untouched lipstick, not knowing it can’t never be used again. ‘Gone’ is the pair of slippers under your bed, I wonder when was the last time you wore them. ‘Gone’ is realising your armchair is vacant. ‘Gone’ is the unfinished skirt you were trying to sew. ‘Gone’ is the deck of cards left on your cupboard, nobody won’t ever play them again. ‘Gone’ are the half empty medicine containers. ‘Gone’ is the space beside my bed.
.
When we lose someone we scan our mind and heart. We search for memories, those striking and meaningful. We ache for that sentimental and big memories that we often overlooked the simple moments in between. As I stay here in “our” bed, I wish so much that I could just watch you as you play solitaire or as you take your medicines- such ordinary things that I took for granted but would **** to experience one more time when it’s all over.
.
Look at it, there should be no understated days. Seize each moment with your love ones, those tiny little moments are what stitches together our very existence. Appreciate each moment before it becomes a memory. Embrace them, squeeze them tight in your heart because one day, unknown to you, it will be the last time you’ll ever experience them.
.
Oh, how I would defy everything just to hug you one more time. Until we meet again **
.
words on write up inspired by some fb post which i read long ago, can’t remember where i saw it.

Another write about suicide. Are they weak for losing the battle? Or are they strong enough to end it all?

letters to belle,
read, in case you forgot

Happy Holidays Hello Poetry ❤️

thanks for the word!
sneaking some writing amidst the busy schedule

Home-less..

Sad thing about being away, is when you do not have a pen. I miss writing and reading!

Sorry I talked nonsense. I mean "fall" in a very broad sense in there. Lost in thoughts and words. Lost in this world I am. Drowning in my own blood of miseries. I just want to let it all out. Oh LIFE.

The story of us.

I maybe be alone most of the times, but I don't always feel lonely..

The path is muddy and bumpy
but the summit is all glory
the mountain is never lonely

Yep yep. Random words fresh from the mountain haha! Looking forward to more mountains to climb!

Today, I finally decided to continue the battle. Got an iron will today.

Just a random write.
Overheard on the bus, a guy was telling his friend that he dreamt of an angel. I don't know, it really caught my attention. I don't even remember if I ever had a dream about an angel.

Raw, first draft. Just need to write this down before the idea fades away. What about a love that comes back and stays? Sounds better? I don't know. Just another cheesy not cheesy 5minute poem because I am too tired to sleep.

01302019

Random. Maybe it was my subconscious.

you’ll probably go to hell
i’ll drag you
with me

I always come back, but always not for good..

How I miss reading and writing. Sorry for the poor poem, it's my first write after what seems a very long time!

I saw it </3

Finally finished this one, after being stucked in my drafts for a long time.
Yep, up for some stories.

Work in progress.
Been so out of character lately.

I'd rather be burn with your love
Can't we lit the fire again?

4/30/19

Good Morning Friday ;) Stay positive!

There you go, for those who kept on asking, yes that's my name.. But still, you will never know my story.

But nothing came out. "Okay" was the only word I uttered. I walk away. It wasn't numbness, it's more like, I was empty and I can't describe it. Well, maybe that's how I broke my heart and maybe that's my definition of painful.

7/16/18

violet for you

So yeah, I've got nothing for today.

In dreams and reality..



When you are at work but this thought comes to your mind and you badly need to write it down so you sneak from work to get it done

I know nothing.

The point is you never did.

it ends with us..

Atleast to me.

Long ago in my drafts. Finally decided to end it this way. Gone into a vacation and I feel like I have a lot to say, but no words would come out, ughhh.