By Arcassin Burnham


Screaming from the shadows hoping somebody hears ya,
Even though nobody cares to notice ya,
Mindful eyes get left dry but they fall down on ya,
There's no secret to your flaws cause they're exposing ya,
I see the fire in your eyes , you're a tough one,
The cookies don't crumble here but others try to persuade the weak,
Reavaluating life choices and separating the good friends from
The bad friends knowing they all despise ya,
Here! You help me with this one thing and I'll promise you won't
Ever have to see me again , talking with everybody,
So you don't have to live with so much selfhate and doubt in ya,
You're strong,
I'm proud of ya,
You usually don't talk too much,
But out of these wannabes, you're a different breed,
With situations in life that'll make you hang yourself then kick over
The chair if you need,
But don't do that please.

By Arcassin Burnham

You'll be blinded by the social scene in corners of your
Brain is shutting off right as we speak,
I'm looking at the t.v. and every lie that's spoken on
The news its what we don't get to see,
Record every moment spent with your family declaring
As an alpha, you will make decisions wisely, for the kids,
Cause they will see better days,
But get them pass these flashing screens ,
Away from the evils , away from the insane,
Won't make you a better parent than me, not being cocky,
For I prepare for every contengency,
I'll never be like the family that was birthing before me,
Carrying around secrecy like it's a sport,
I promise you all I never will come up short,
I'm still on the rise,
While you sit and just scrutinize,
I swear I will have no time,
For the ignorance that you possess,
See the fire in my eyes.

You
You drive me nuts
All I can do is think of you
And how you so easily control me

I pride myself on being independent
But all you do is look at me
And craving your control
I become yours

Craving your hand on my throat
Your marks on my body
The immobility from your control
Your body pressed against me

I must feel your bite on my skin
You pulling my hair
Your hands roaming my body
Your breath on my chest

I must hear you say "mine"
The quit sound of undoing my bra
Your sigh of approval as you look at me
Your breathing next to my ear

I must see you smile at me
The pride in your face for having me
The relaxed version of you
The controlling you

You make me crazy
But I'm addicted
I must have more
You

By Arcassin Burnham


I've watched you your whole life,
I want you to do right , that's what God would say..
I've watched you your whole life,
I want you to **** up, that's what the devil would say..
Depression that eats you up , anxiety humiliates,
But in any case,
Some dark parts of my soul need to be cleaned out and
I'm willing to wait,

In this darkness , in this darkness,
Wondering where has my mind gone..
In this darkness , in this darkness,
I just wanna be all alone...
In this darkness , in this darkness,
Unusual to be home grown,
In this darkness , in this darkness,
Lord please just take me home...

You don't know where you're going,
but you don't know where you've been,
trying not to remember...
You don't know where you're going,
in these dark days ahead,
you better find yourself a new...
In this darkness , in this darkness,
I better have a light shine down,
I've watched my whole reputation crumble to little pieces under
My feet , it always got me down,
In this darkness  , in this darkness,
You don't know where you're going,
There's nobody else around,

In this darkness , in this darkness,
Wondering where has my mind gone..
In this darkness , in this darkness,
I just wanna be all alone...
In this darkness , in this darkness,
Unusual to be home grown,
In this darkness , in this darkness,
Lord please just take me home...

A painting of men,
tangled in a web of flesh.
Drifting into hell.

Drifting into sleep,
I put on your mix CD
to rinse my eyes clean.

I would pray for you.
Writing it gives me chills and
I might wash my hands.

I yearn for your arms,
and exhale daydreams of love.
Pretending to breathe.

I want you to breathe.
I choke you as we **** and
say something nasty.

You know, John Cage said,
"In the dark, all cats are black."
Maybe that's why we

close our eyes to kiss,
or sleep in each others arms;
We don't fear our night.

By Arcassin Burnham


Showing kindness in an speechless manner to make
Anybody wanna resent you even more than they already have,
Dipping toes in the lake below having a fresh calmness in
The world you don't wanna really be in,
Wondering,

Where does the after life go when the lights dim in a four wall room
Without a door to open,
Loss of breath,
No hand to hold in times of discomfort,
Don't make it sound more depressing than it has to be , just learn,
Be vigilant to everything and everyone around making moves like
It's black Friday with fists flying,

You are a symbol for what kindness is and kindness is what
Everyone should have,
It's apparent that everything that has happened will be for reason
And not for a cause but improving the change,
You came along way young one.

By Arcassin Burnham


A young boy training to be a fully grown man is practical,
I was thinking about my step dad and how he was an *******,
Remember all the times when I would wanna send my soul
Off to heaven,
Getting ready for a lucky 97,
Birth years are overrated anyway when people struggle just to
Love The one they dream but knowing half the people would
Rather see you crumble just to make themselves so noticeable
In a situation you could not hold your own any longer,
Just to save your life,
Playing all the cards , don't mean it's right,
Sitting at the red light , waiting for the green to take me
Home with a 40 ounce can and mind full of doubts hoping I just
Make it through this life somehow,
If you didn't know then , your about to know now,
Tried to **** myself 6 times without making a sound.

To 2016:
I'd love to say that I hated you, but to be honest, you made me grow.
You gave me direction. You pulled me out of a 4 month long rock bottom depression, showed me what I wanted to do in my life and sent me on my way.
You gave me two semesters of college, and a decision.
You gave me my first teaching experience, and you taught me the true value of patience.
You brought some new friends into my life and reunited me with old ones. You also got rid of a few, but I trust that's for the best.
You explained to me how easily I can be used.
You showed me that relationships don't define me, and that even if I think I am in love, life goes on and that I am an independent woman.
You blessed me with a baby, and then you took it away. But within that you gave me hope.
You sent me through hookups, drunken texts, hospital trips, gallons of tears and two D&Cs.;
You helped me on my wavering journey in my walk with God. You led me to being Baptized and you gave me the one chance in my life to feel that I was my family's priority.  
You taught me that it's okay to not always have the answer to everything, including the question of "who are you?".
You taught me to accept the word queer and make it my own. Like a beautiful pair of glasses, this is how I see the world.
You taught me the value of family after my dads accident, and then again after the baby.
And even after all the drama, fights, murders, and injustices, 2016, you taught me that a bad year isn't always a bad as we make it seem, and that even on our darkest days, there is a lesson to be learned.
And to 2016: Thank you.