Tall, slender, and beautiful.
Running free in the forest.
Flashes of brown, and green
appear as you run by.
Rare, but common.
The Moose

NO.
We are not simply
'together'
Because we are friends.

NO.
We are not
'dating'
Because I am female and he is male.

NO.*
Also, even if we *were.
Why is it your business?
Let's just say.
We happen to date.
Why,
In the name of god,
Do you care?
You are not him.
You are not me.
So stop wasting your words on us,
When you could find someone for yourself.

I don't know why
I just feel I'm better off
Staying in the same room I was born in
I look outside
And see a whole world better off
Without me in it trying to transform it

You are out of my mind,
You aren't seeing my side,
You waste all this time trying to get to me
But you are out of my mind

Listen, I know
This one's a contradiction because of how happy it sounds
But the lyrics are so down
It's okay though
Because it represents, wait, better yet it is
Who I feel I am right now

You are out of my mind, ooh
You aren't seeing my side, ooh
You waste all of this time trying to get to me
But you are out of my mind

Heard you say
Not today
Tore the curtains down
Windows open, now make a sound
Heard your voice
There's no choice
Tore the curtains down
Windows open, now make a noise

Oh, don't you test me, no
Just because I play the piano
Doesn't mean not
I'm not willing to take you down
I'm sorry

I'm, I'm out of my mind,
I'm, I'm not seeing things right,
I waste all this time trying to run from you
But I'm, I'm out of my mind

Heard you say
Not today
Tore the curtains down
Windows open, now make a sound
Heard your voice
There's no choice
Tore the curtains down
Windows open, now make a noise

You are out of my mind
You aren't seeing my side
You waste all of this time trying to get to me
But you are out of my mind

Heard you say
Not today
Tore the curtains down
Windows open, now make a sound
Heard your voice
There's no choice
Tore the curtains down
Windows open, now make a noise.

my poems
with feeling
i guess
are no longer
considered
good.

what do you want
me to write
do you want things
that don't make sense
or things that
are off topic

the only thing
i can write
is feeling.

and those poems
seem to
be
out of season.

a sweeping overload of emotion
that takes me and chains
my ankles and wrists the ground
and takes my soul from me

They want a perfect child.

Someone who likes sports.
A girl who gets good grades.
Friendly.
Funny.
Innocent.
Someone who pleases them.

I'm not a perfect child.

I don't like sports.
I don't get good grades.
I'm not very friendly.
I'm not funny.
I'm not innocent.
I don't please them.

Still, they want a perfect child.

They're not going to get one.
At least, not out of me.

I'm still not a perfect child.

I'm not a child anymore.

I'm broken.
I'm bent.
I'm destroyed.

the single idea of that perfect moment that holds that perfect person
that prosperity of the idea
where i am no longer alive, no longer dead.
the single idea of that perfect place, of the perfect me, of the perfect outfit.
how about this, world?
**That idea? It's a ******* lie.

Did it?
May I ask?
Oh, the questions I have.

The shadows faded into corners,
as I pulled the light
towards me.

I hoped, pulling up my scared lip
They didn't notice the hope and light
Supporting me gently

I'm not drowning anymore.
*I'm treading.

The thickness of it all
Chocked her.

They asked, How long?
She turned. Indefinitely.
So, her dreams faded to ash.

The smoke grappled for control
As it crawled through her lungs
She fought softly
The smoke retreated
Alone into the darkness of it all

**A unfair fight, so I am guessing.

I smoked the plants
I cut down the trees
Letting life pour through me

Closing my eyes
dropping to the dirt

A owl
it sang a sound

I knew this sound.
i got up, dripping in the sound's voice

See, there?
the owl sits, waiting to let out the song
that saved us.

It happened to me.

Statistics.
That is me now.
I scream and I cry
Into the depths of my pillow.

I had not been wearing something that showed me.
I screamed and thrashed.
I am now a
Statistic.*

Help me.
Rid me of the memories
That play across my eyelids
Whenever my eyes close.

I regret every second
Of that tortured night.
And just when I thought it stopped
and the pain was gone
The real pain
Hadn't even started.

([<+>])
i'm stuck.
([<+>])

Nails on my skin
you pull me back
the only thing keeping me from death
you whisper,
don't go..
But you let go
my arm falling limply to my side
I shake my head slightly
and you nod
Tears streak down your red face
but you know
that I have to go

I remember,
looking up
I could see the shining stars
twinkling happily
out my old bedroom window
If only I could be as happy as them
Clouds cover the stars tonight
coating the world in a navy slur
But I hold this knife now
taken from my kitchen
hidden in my sock drawer
And I stand here
feeling stronger than ever
hidden so no one will find me
I can't deal with this
I don't care about the abuse
I know you won't miss me
I write this to inform you
that I was never happy on this earth
I might be on the next
No one will know
No one will care
So today I draw my knife
and I press it to my chest
as one for the billions
No one will miss me
My hand shakes
droplets of blood fall
mixing with tears
I have to
Don't worry about me,

**I'll be fine

Looking down, I sigh.
Looking up, I smile.
Happily I climb
The mountain of
Separation.

I reach your side.
I hold your hand
I smile at you.
Finally,
We are
One.

The magical feeling that
Swarms me,
Executes my Sadness
And brings forth
The feeling
Of
Solitude.

We banished the mountain
Sure, we harmed a few
Wrecking *****.
But,
To see your green eyes again,
It was
Worth It.

I let the
Love into my heart.
It made me grow
It made me light up.
That stupid Mountain of Separation
Is utterly destroyed
Into
Pieces of imagination.

A consideration for the smallest things.

pebbles, sand, birds.

I look down at the smallest things,
and try to express the sudden urge of gratitude
that lays a blanket on me.

fire, sun, warmth.

Yes, they are small.
Yes, most people overlook them.
Yes, most people take them for granted.

water, ice, snow.

The smallest things
Are the things that change us.

See, a few days ago,
I was standing outside in the pouring rain.
A child walks up to me.
She says,
"Miss, are you alright?"
I say,
"I think I am now."

So the smallest things
Are the things that change us.

When I meet someone new,
They ask,
"Hey, how are you?"

Why do you ask?
I mean,
I can say,
"I'm good, how about you?"
Or, I can say,
"I'm dying inside with the deathly feeling of the solitude that has become my life, and slowly withering into small pieces from the constant harming words that now dominate my life. But then again."

"You don't care."

"So go ahead and spill your life story. The ups and downs. The amazing and mysterious dilemmas that have appeared in your life. So talk to me. I will listen. Or try to cut in, and try to enter. But. But."

**"You won't listen."

I wipe tears from my eyes.
[**** it this is hard]
I cloak myself in darkness.
[i guess it can hide me]
My eyes are rimmed in red so I hide them.
[blah, bah. she says to look like i'm okay]
Chin up, head high.
[but i don't want to lie. i'm not alright.]
No more tears.
But I'm sobbing still inside.
*I never stopped.