Missing you more
than you can imagine ok.
It’s been hard trying
to avoid these feelings
these past few days.
I don’t know if you
feel the same or even moved
on with someone else
but I just want you back,
fight for you.
You matter so much to me.
Im not asking to start
where we left off, just
continue to build this relationship.
You felt hurt & triggered
I honestly had no idea
So I take accountability for that.
I been trying to get this off my chest
for awhile now, because I really like you.
I don’t wanna wait
for another day to go by
without talking & trying.

Dear Jesus,

Happy birthday once again king! I am so proud & thrilled to celebrate your day + happy to be alive to enjoy it with my own family. It’s not a day that goes by when I think about what you have done for us.
So this year, we will be thankful as our attention is on you.
Today we will sing your name
Today we will glorify your presence
Today we will honor your love

Since today’s your day,
I just have to ask…
What would you like this year for your birthday?

December 25, 2021

only good deeds
stay at ease
we’re in control of this destiny
try to make it pro so desperately
get recognize around the world & the big leagues
only one plan there’s nothing else
win multiple rewards to prove one’s self
I know we can make it
this chance we can take it
Lord, Lord, Lord

I’m your partner; I’m your bestie;
bounce with me, on a daily

I’m your supporter; when you’re angry;
shoot your shot; express though feelings

you know me; ya main friend;
ball is life, til the end

I’m your master plan…
I’m your master plan…

Dear God,

I remember the day I sat down with my high school coach who’s like a father to me, tell me a story about his father sitting him down about the afterlife.
His father said, “You really don’t know what’s going to happen after death. At the end of the day one group is right, and a whole lot of people are wrong. Better hope your group right.” - then me & coach both laughed.
After I laughed, I started to really think who’s right & who’s wrong.
Because of the unknown, that’s why I have faith.

November 20, 1977

Dear God,

When is enough “enough” for you?
We (your creation) have sinned, cast stones, apologize for our actions, been forgiven, felt good, then repeated the same cycles for centuries to come.
So again I ask, when is enough “enough” for you?
Or you love us that much, hoping we’ll finally get the message.


February 14, 1989

Dear God,

When I die
I want my day to be celebrated.
No pain, no sorrows, no regrets, no sadness.
Just a big party full of fun living, breathing, healthy people who enjoy the company of genuine people.
That I be remembered as a goofy, silly, different type of unique being that has enjoyed his time on earth.
Because I can honestly say I lived & learned in this world.
And I did it all thanks to you.

October 26, 2038

Dear God,

Thank you for waking me up this morning. Forgive me for my sins & unknown sins each and everyday.

June 20, 1994

Dear God,

I’m mad.
Sometimes I wish you would come down here & stop the madness that goes on around here. The killing, stealing, disrespect. I wish that you would stop these bad people from harming others for their own desires.

But at the same time, how can I be mad at you? You gave us free will. You gave us everything we needed and it was certain individuals own fault that caused all of these issues to occur.
It’s s not your fault that we don’t know how to behave. I guess I’m upset because I want you to do something about it.
I’m sorry. Forgive my ignorance.

Sometimes I just wish you controlled these situations.

March 9, 1988

Dear God,

I have days where I wish I was with you in heaven. No, I’m not suicidal. I just think about you taking my soul away as I spend all eternity with you.
But then I start to think, “How selfish of me would that be when I haven’t even fulfilled my purpose on earth yet”, you know?
I haven’t tried to change my life around. Given myself time to find out who I am or what makes me, “me”. Nor realize how it would affect family / friends to see me gone in an instant.

So thank you for not taking me away just yet. I will fulfill your request. I promise

But what is my purpose?

July 8, 1974

Dear God,

I don’t know if you saw, but the other day, I saved someone’s life with my words. They told me they were cutting themselves to the point where they **** near killed themselves. But I came into their lives right on time, sharing my story that was very identical to theirs.
The difference between us was that I kept fighting for my life. Then I showed them how to fight for theirs so they survive.
I honestly didn’t know I had something like this in me. I mean I was just writing down how I felt.
Yet, to hear them say I saved theirs life made me cry with them happily.

Looks like you have another angel coming your way.

April 14, 2020

Dear God,

Tonight, after having this difficult conversation with my woman.
I pray that you continue to guide us both on the right path. We ask the right questions. We take care of each other regardless. And that things will be revealed to us to know if we are ready for marriage or not.
But most of all, if we belong to one another under your will.

September 1, 2006

Dear God,

Lately I’ve been feeling attacked by family. More than often, and don’t understand why?
I pray, I stay out of trouble for the most part, read the Bible from time to time, and because of you I finally found one of my callings. Poetry. I know I haven’t been around or talked much. I’m invested into my craft. My energy/ attitude never changed. I’m still the same strong spirit, will minded, giving child you created for this world.
Back then they said - “ Put God in the center, be anything you want, pay no attention to stupidity.”  
Now it’s, “Go get a good job with benefits, why aren’t you back in school, I don’t think this is what God intended for you.”
I don’t get it.
I’m just trying to obey your orders and demonstrate it to the family, best way I know how.
I just don’t understand.

So why me????

December 6, 2004

Dear God,

Random questions:
What is it like to be God? To see over everyone and everything you created. To watch things on earth fade away like certain animals going extinct as new ones be replaced. Is the work difficult sometimes or easy?

How strong are you?
Like seriously. I want to know how strong you  are. I think it would be so cool to see you in action demonstrating your power.

What exactly do you look like? I know you tell us we’re made in your image and all but I must see what you look like if possible.

Lastly, have you ever been embarrassed or embarrassed yourself before? For example-
Person “A” is talking to person “B” right. And all of sudden, person “A” pass gas in front of “B” because “A” thought it was going to be silent.
Something silly like that.

May 16, 1984

Dear God,

Do you ever crack jokes?
Every time I read the Bible, I only read about you blessing people, causing wrath due to disobedience, or telling someone what to do in order to receive what they desire most and be thankful.
But one thing the Bible never talks about is you laughing.
Unless I’m not reading in between the lines and you actually are from time to time.

I would definitely love to see that one day.

January 4, 2010

Dear God,

So, if we are grown at a certain age…
But are considered a child of God…
Shouldn’t we stay in a child’s place???

June 23, 2021

Dear God,

How do we have all of these religions in the world.
But we have similar devil(s)???

March 13, 1950

Dear God,

The signs you are making me see, what do those exactly mean? Is this what the future would possibly look like for me if I continue down this path?

August 9, 1999

Dear God,

Out of the 10 commandments: My biggest sin is adultery.
I love ***. Especially as much as the next person, you know. But I do have it under control for the most part.
I don’t know why but these urges keep coming. Like today, the only thing that was on my mind was eating and sleeping because I didn’t get enough rest last night. As I awake, I immediately start having intense energy for ***. I am strong to say “NO” or stop myself from time to time. I have common sense not to spread my seeds around town. But it’s hard man.
I’m smart & humble.
I’m not perfect but I try.

So I’m asking you this evening to help me control my urges. Because as a man, I tend to want *** a lot; however, I am trying my hardest to control it the best way I know how.

December 25, 2008

Dear God,

Today I pray for mental health and for those who can not fight for themselves. That consistently need help on a day in/out.
It’s sad to see an individual you love go through what they go through, knowing they have to learn how to fight for themselves when they feel like they can’t. They feel like they don’t have enough will power to overcome their own situation.

April 23, 2001

Dear God,

No weapon shall prosper against me for my list:

Continue to make me stronger mentally, physically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually.

Allow my mistakes / sins to be lessons and vanish. Let my wisdom/ faith bloom for others.

Forgive me and my family as I am the head of the household, not the tail.

Grant my future wife the meaning of being “submissive”. Godly ways, not earthly flesh ways.

I need my wife to be rich in mental health, in her own goals, her gains, and pockets.
Let her cup be full of joy & wonders with mine.

Allow our children, she will have to bare, to come out healthy as she to makes a 100% full recovery.

Allow my children to lean on you Lord. Open their hearts, mind, and study your words. In the Bible, 2 Corinthians, have them “preach the word of God with sincerity and with Christ authority, knowing that God is watching.”

Let me teach my children to wear the shield of armor at all times so they may protect their self-image.

Help my children to become stable & calm under pressure when times get tough. Keep their minds focus on the prize they seek with good deeds.

No weapon shall prosper against me for my list:

October 17, 2015

Dear God,

The other day I learned that I was not ready for marriage yet. I still have a few old doors that need to be closed in order to fulfill my promise. Not many, just a handful. I need to get my finances in check, as well as receive a better job. Work on my brand so I can quit my 9-5. (Boy I can’t wait for that day.)
Secondly, I need to continue to speak with you and my partner about us moving forward together. That this is not only what we both want, but what you want from us. That you approve our marriage or not.

November 2, 1990

Dear God,

I cried joy creating these books.
Simply because now I have something to leave behind for people to read. They can revert back to knowing they weren’t the only one going through joy & pain / sunshine & rain.
Giving back to those who lost their way or forgotten why it’s important to live.
To show that when you start an idea, you keep going. You may feel the “want” to give up. However; you must remember why you wanted to start your idea in the first place.
Take passion & creativity to another level to make it exist.
That being said,
I am leaving behind a legacy of who I am.
My art work, ideas, craft, identity.
All will bare witness to this blessing.
This is my story to tell. That’s my poetry.  

May 15, 2020