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"flagellation" poems
1. Nymphomaniac-addicts, Overweight bisexual vegetarians Climbing trees to stay fit and eating 80’s fried chicken ******* 2. just imagine Aquarians full of class valedictorians Swimming on display for graduation ceremony… reverse-symbolism of how Moolch drowned His ***** 3. Better yet, just imagine Holy wars, Beautiful words written to describe the burning pains Of holocaust...the Kristallnacht nights Under the mistletoe, Watching Hall of fame ball hawks on pivot toes Driving through hoes After the whistle blows 4 College Literacy classes teaching basic: Ideas that good questions leads to good answers, Reading reminders Free association conceptual constructions 5. But ************ professor: free association **** shticks misfires, false alarms are all art, too, Like sticking a dagger into an apple, Not the edible, but the technology. 6. Go head, deconstruct the philosophy Of oral cute-tification, according to the Tautology of Leviticus, With the same three half truths, pogroms against biological deviant... FLAGS! 7. Cryptic gospels of a ************ Where three F.F.F’s Stands for six six six Like how 1mg of juxtaposition And a dose of metamorphosis is the repertoire of a king of curmudgeon ‘cause even the Holy Ghost drinks from the cup of Christ’s blood. 8. Reading, Self-flagellation gospel-manual of Pope John Paul II, At shrink sessions under the daze of heron Piper methysticum blunts With sweet phat butts like lit lickerish that droop eyes Like the psalm of Valeriana officinalis root extract.
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Feb 12, 2012
Feb 12, 2012 at 12:46 PM UTC
Phrenology of SAMO (from 1.Amativeness to 8. Acquisitiveness)
1. Nymphomaniac-addicts, Overweight bisexual vegetarians Climbing trees to stay fit and eating 80’s fried chicken ******* 2. just imagine Aquarians full of class valedictorians Swimming on display for graduation ceremony… reverse-symbolism of how Moolch drowned His ***** 3. Better yet, just imagine Holy wars, Beautiful words written to describe the burning pains Of holocaust...the Kristallnacht nights Under the mistletoe, Watching Hall of fame ball hawks on pivot toes Driving through hoes After the whistle blows 4 College Literacy classes teaching basic: Ideas that good questions leads to good answers, Reading reminders Free association conceptual constructions 5. But ************ professor: free association **** shticks misfires, false alarms are all art, too, Like sticking a dagger into an apple, Not the edible, but the technology. 6. Go head, deconstruct the philosophy Of oral cute-tification, according to the Tautology of Leviticus, With the same three half truths, pogroms against biological deviant... FLAGS! 7. Cryptic gospels of a ************ Where three F.F.F’s Stands for six six six Like how 1mg of juxtaposition And a dose of metamorphosis is the repertoire of a king of curmudgeon ‘cause even the Holy Ghost drinks from the cup of Christ’s blood. 8. Reading, Self-flagellation gospel-manual of Pope John Paul II, At shrink sessions under the daze of heron Piper methysticum blunts With sweet phat butts like lit lickerish that droop eyes Like the psalm of Valeriana officinalis root extract.
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52
Acts of love save. They save from evil from envy from suffering from disturbing memories. Only acts of love save. From the nightmarish and stagnant life. From anxieties from unnecessary tears. Acts of love save. From words that hurts from the fiend of insomnia. From self-flagellation. From monotony and emptiness. Only love saves you from sadness lagoon from yourself.
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Sep 24, 2018
Sep 24, 2018 at 1:07 AM UTC
Monologue
I'm an idiot, idi-fool, Idiot, idiot, idi-tool,   Idiot, idi-lump,   Idiot, idi-chump, Idiot, idiot, most uncool. I'm an idiot, idi-goon, Idiot, idiot, idi-loon,   Idiot, idi-berk,   Idiot, idi-jerk, Idiot, idiot; a buffoon. I'm an idiot, idi-plum, Idiot, idiot, and so dumb,   Idiot, idi-pratt,   Idiot, getting fat, Idiot, idiot, feeling glum.
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Jun 14, 2010
Jun 14, 2010 at 9:00 PM UTC
Self-Flagellation
The alarm clock rings and once again the rooster sings the morning new. Slumbering flowers lift their petals to drink the drops of dew.   Reliable Sun vanquishes the darkness as he lightens the sky.   I see an honored guest is in the garden, his tiny nametag reads... butterfly.        But on the other side of town        someone struggles with        addiction.  Habits grab hard, break will powers  in two. The will becomes won't and the power is all through. Satiated, temporaneously satisfied. only till the next time the habit has to be gratified. The victim moves on trying to reassemble his day Avoid a crooked roaded relapse, along the way. Oh ghost of the host why must repitition repeat the most and feel so good in its continuation? Why must familiarity breed the need for more familiar feelings? To the point of killing control, sealing a fate, dealing defeat, stifle healing.      If your out there guardian soul, spirit helper, what's your roll, your goal?   Guiding with helping hand or let stand the habitualized habit man. Isn't there  a self preservation station within? A gland or impulse control button to switch from sin to win? Even Edgar Allan Poe stubbed his toe on a ten step program trying to get in the door. Ill-begotten and craven, drunken and unshaven cried the raven...never more. Guiding spirit it ends here!          No more slave to the crave or impulse picking from the addiction tree. The need to repeat and repeat the pattern becomes a self fulfilling prophesy. Back to normalacy, complacency, it's a moderation that one seeks. To enjoy the ****** of bells, hallalulah wails, a babies dimpled cheeks. Can you do that Spirit helper, please. Let sing the bodies vibration.  No more internal damnation. No more self flagellation. Allow to draw power from these words. Think of this all as an intervention!
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Jun 25, 2018
Jun 25, 2018 at 6:52 PM UTC
Addicted to Habit
The alarm clock rings and once again the rooster sings the morning new. Slumbering flowers lift their petals to drink the drops of dew.   Reliable Sun vanquishes the darkness as he lightens the sky.   I see an honored guest is in the garden, his tiny nametag reads... butterfly.        But on the other side of town        someone struggles with        addiction.  Habits grab hard, break will powers  in two. The will becomes won't and the power is all through. Satiated, temporaneously satisfied. only till the next time the habit has to be gratified. The victim moves on trying to reassemble his day Avoid a crooked roaded relapse, along the way. Oh ghost of the host why must repitition repeat the most and feel so good in its continuation? Why must familiarity breed the need for more familiar feelings? To the point of killing control, sealing a fate, dealing defeat, stifle healing.      If your out there guardian soul, spirit helper, what's your roll, your goal?   Guiding with helping hand or let stand the habitualized habit man. Isn't there  a self preservation station within? A gland or impulse control button to switch from sin to win? Even Edgar Allan Poe stubbed his toe on a ten step program trying to get in the door. Ill-begotten and craven, drunken and unshaven cried the raven...never more. Guiding spirit it ends here!          No more slave to the crave or impulse picking from the addiction tree. The need to repeat and repeat the pattern becomes a self fulfilling prophesy. Back to normalacy, complacency, it's a moderation that one seeks. To enjoy the ****** of bells, hallalulah wails, a babies dimpled cheeks. Can you do that Spirit helper, please. Let sing the bodies vibration.  No more internal damnation. No more self flagellation. Allow to draw power from these words. Think of this all as an intervention!
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56
Nag, nagging, Finger wagging, Shoulders sagging, Victim slagging. Oh beration, Flagellation, Irritating Castigation. Cutting hemlock, On her chopping block, Innuendoes Spawning ad hoc. Super-intending, Condescending, Never ending, Insult fending. Pointless rounds Of empty double-talk, Wife, your name is Self-styled wise hawk.
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Oct 11, 2018
Oct 11, 2018 at 6:33 AM UTC
Ode to Trouble 'n Strife
Fresh wounds Begin to fester Tearing inward Scars  deepen Transported from flesh To the soul of a victim, Specific pain Catered to the controller An intimate bond of blood to emotion Crimson Consumption Pristine Flagellation Perfect Punishment With each step My youth deteriorates Enticing me deeper into the void To which I am held captive l.v.s and z.w.b
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Jan 26, 2017
Jan 26, 2017 at 2:56 AM UTC
Fresh Wounds (Collab with Zachary)
she was the first to act as though she wanted to be my beretta, to hold a holster to my thigh and accept the badge of partner in crime. she spoke without shelter. pool days of marination in monsters and taurus, a kiss for pity as i'd yet to be corrupted, and she stole some joy in taking what wasn't hers. she was bigger than me. she showed me how shattered touch screens can look like dried petals, but cut like cold ******* and when you're in a field of dandelions how they come in handy. she wrote the book on flagellation. she promised it was all for me; calloused fingertips from loving me with lighter fluid, scratches for feral adoration, and the damocles' above my head or rather hers, and hers to drop on a whim. she wrote a chapter on manipulation. i wasn't ready the first time she pushed passed denim and plaid as easily as she waived my concern, nor the second -- nor the third. she had daddy issues. i still didn't know how tampons worked, or vaginas for that matter, and so to be forcefully and viscerally introduced to both behind a tree in Henessey ****** up my brain a little. she called it "mad week." ear bud cables became garrotes around my neck in the suspended movement of a pulse through my aorta; and as every day with her, i felt she crossed a line, and as every day before, i never called foul.
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May 2, 2013
May 2, 2013 at 2:07 AM UTC
her name was trauma (2)
And the rivulets spun through tapestries of golden guilt, aligning themselves with the magnetic regrets of my life path. There’s a rage in me from everything that hasn’t worked out. A tendency toward pity and self-flagellation. A poor, little wretch who has come to believe that he deserves life’s beatings. But I’m a nice guy, so instead of directing that anger outward, I direct it at myself—a victim-martyr caught in a loop of self-punishment to save the world from myself. I want to wake up and feel love and purpose, but instead I just feel like I’m surviving—clawing my way back to feeling lost and uncertain only to fall back asleep and do it all over again. The child in me is scared. He’s crying in a dark room clutching his knees to his chest. I guess I’m waiting. Waiting for that fabled moment of clarity. Waiting for a beautiful woman to save me. Waiting for the path to reveal itself. Waiting for something outside of myself to make the choice for me. Waiting for life to happen instead of choosing it. I’m scared too. Scared I’ll make the wrong choice. Scared I’ll always be alone. Scared I’ll go the wrong way. But I’m more scared of waiting here forever and never knowing who I could’ve become. Yes, there are burdens in my life, pressures and darkness, but they are not the end—they are the forging. Without them I would never reach, I would never become something more. So I bless these days of darkness, these challenges in my life for blessing me with strength, wisdom and the opportunity for immense growth. Thank you.
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Sep 1, 2025
Sep 1, 2025 at 10:16 AM UTC
the diamond under the mountain
And the rivulets spun through tapestries of golden guilt, aligning themselves with the magnetic regrets of my life path. There’s a rage in me from everything that hasn’t worked out. A tendency toward pity and self-flagellation. A poor, little wretch who has come to believe that he deserves life’s beatings. But I’m a nice guy, so instead of directing that anger outward, I direct it at myself—a victim-martyr caught in a loop of self-punishment to save the world from myself. I want to wake up and feel love and purpose, but instead I just feel like I’m surviving—clawing my way back to feeling lost and uncertain only to fall back asleep and do it all over again. The child in me is scared. He’s crying in a dark room clutching his knees to his chest. I guess I’m waiting. Waiting for that fabled moment of clarity. Waiting for a beautiful woman to save me. Waiting for the path to reveal itself. Waiting for something outside of myself to make the choice for me. Waiting for life to happen instead of choosing it. I’m scared too. Scared I’ll make the wrong choice. Scared I’ll always be alone. Scared I’ll go the wrong way. But I’m more scared of waiting here forever and never knowing who I could’ve become. Yes, there are burdens in my life, pressures and darkness, but they are not the end—they are the forging. Without them I would never reach, I would never become something more. So I bless these days of darkness, these challenges in my life for blessing me with strength, wisdom and the opportunity for immense growth. Thank you.
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1
" i always wondered if fish drooled ? "  she said... and left it there like a cartoon tumbleweed, caked in glitter and sprite phlegm. she stood across an ocean on an island of outlandish abandonment, where all the mirrors crack.  her passing quakes the stain off her daily betrothal to a toothless bigot in the land of freedom's end in the hovel of her heart's fall from appointed grace. a place of a thousand cuts and no car. waaaay out in the country of her diminished affections, her eyes could be seen wandering the burnt out villa of her lost love, where she recalls the fairy rings piercing her lips and the trembling of her youth, finding a slow hand to explore the wet *** without peril, soaring with her palm, plastered to a feathered bed in a guest room, in a time-share. grampa sleep. and bird's nest pitch black. " i always wondered if fish drooled ? " she said... she slept through it... on to the next disconnect  to get intimate with. she left me there, like a chocolate mint resting on a pillow made of shards of habitual flagellation by candle light and instinct; resting on a bed of nails rusting in the flood plain of her fondest wish. she left me there to conspire with her better demons, to witness - the benign desperation of her frenzied exploration of actual actualization... to watch her ****** from the jaws of a dire wolf, her bleeding heart and her ransom. with her bare teeth and a naked Truth. you should have seen her face. i tattooed her secrets on the iris of a blind ghost, i swore it " abide in her broken heart like an open door with a cool breeze slinking through the fetid air of her self defeat and stale bread bumble bees. and to abide by her rules when she finds them... then to ghostly fall upon his ghost sword by midnight with a smile that tells hell it cannot claim what rises. a smile that spat at the devil and pitied his children. a ghost smile that stole a book from a museum and never told his other books why.
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May 12, 2013
May 12, 2013 at 5:07 AM UTC
" i always wondered if fish drooled ? " she said...
" i always wondered if fish drooled ? "  she said... and left it there like a cartoon tumbleweed, caked in glitter and sprite phlegm. she stood across an ocean on an island of outlandish abandonment, where all the mirrors crack.  her passing quakes the stain off her daily betrothal to a toothless bigot in the land of freedom's end in the hovel of her heart's fall from appointed grace. a place of a thousand cuts and no car. waaaay out in the country of her diminished affections, her eyes could be seen wandering the burnt out villa of her lost love, where she recalls the fairy rings piercing her lips and the trembling of her youth, finding a slow hand to explore the wet *** without peril, soaring with her palm, plastered to a feathered bed in a guest room, in a time-share. grampa sleep. and bird's nest pitch black. " i always wondered if fish drooled ? " she said... she slept through it... on to the next disconnect  to get intimate with. she left me there, like a chocolate mint resting on a pillow made of shards of habitual flagellation by candle light and instinct; resting on a bed of nails rusting in the flood plain of her fondest wish. she left me there to conspire with her better demons, to witness - the benign desperation of her frenzied exploration of actual actualization... to watch her ****** from the jaws of a dire wolf, her bleeding heart and her ransom. with her bare teeth and a naked Truth. you should have seen her face. i tattooed her secrets on the iris of a blind ghost, i swore it " abide in her broken heart like an open door with a cool breeze slinking through the fetid air of her self defeat and stale bread bumble bees. and to abide by her rules when she finds them... then to ghostly fall upon his ghost sword by midnight with a smile that tells hell it cannot claim what rises. a smile that spat at the devil and pitied his children. a ghost smile that stole a book from a museum and never told his other books why.
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21
Drinking *** to reminisce about fun times drinking *** and talking about dumb lines where a sociologist posed as an astronomer and took the moniker to heart claiming forbidden foolish nonsense of black holes and super novas and the Goddess that is Neptune. But he also forbade the odes of the old testament, he nicked the hold on my head and soul and feet until I couldn’t walk because I was too busy kicking my *** and licking my teeth with thoughts of dinner stolen from the solemn souls in the coral reefs – those that Neptune created and nurtured with nursing fingers and eyes that hid cruel truth from the water, the creatures that didn’t suffer the bite that God’s daughter took so long ago, but the flow of the current never ceases it never reaches the bleeding feet connecting repeatedly with the bottom that serves me to sit and think or **** about the gospel spilling from the hostel of the professor’s mouth. And I doubt the drought that lifted my spirits out of the well with the spout of Neptune’s ***** These days I’m on it with a sense of self-flagellation that only makes sense in the dimension of my imagination pondering the nation of the brotherhood of stars and heavenly bodies that weigh so heavy on Mars with the clingy core dragging desperate attention from divine inventions of intervention with rats and cradles. Neptune, who’s cradled in fables and left to such imaginations as those. Invention allows the suspension of disbelief and spite if one might rest in humility in face of such things as humanity where miracles are mistreated and under-recognized and falsely advertised as products of greedy eyes that lie in wait to shake the foundation and tune it to the stellar station or broadcast populated by the whispers of holy apparitions misconstrued as static. Jacob is the heathen with reason to grasp his brother’s heel and deceive him. The treason to sit up to stand down to kiss the hem of the gown of whatever clown performs a pretty act while he’s in town. The frowns expound and expand for the man whose body spans the sand of the holy land.
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Sep 5, 2012
Sep 5, 2012 at 11:34 PM UTC
Academic Nonslaught
Drinking *** to reminisce about fun times drinking *** and talking about dumb lines where a sociologist posed as an astronomer and took the moniker to heart claiming forbidden foolish nonsense of black holes and super novas and the Goddess that is Neptune. But he also forbade the odes of the old testament, he nicked the hold on my head and soul and feet until I couldn’t walk because I was too busy kicking my *** and licking my teeth with thoughts of dinner stolen from the solemn souls in the coral reefs – those that Neptune created and nurtured with nursing fingers and eyes that hid cruel truth from the water, the creatures that didn’t suffer the bite that God’s daughter took so long ago, but the flow of the current never ceases it never reaches the bleeding feet connecting repeatedly with the bottom that serves me to sit and think or **** about the gospel spilling from the hostel of the professor’s mouth. And I doubt the drought that lifted my spirits out of the well with the spout of Neptune’s ***** These days I’m on it with a sense of self-flagellation that only makes sense in the dimension of my imagination pondering the nation of the brotherhood of stars and heavenly bodies that weigh so heavy on Mars with the clingy core dragging desperate attention from divine inventions of intervention with rats and cradles. Neptune, who’s cradled in fables and left to such imaginations as those. Invention allows the suspension of disbelief and spite if one might rest in humility in face of such things as humanity where miracles are mistreated and under-recognized and falsely advertised as products of greedy eyes that lie in wait to shake the foundation and tune it to the stellar station or broadcast populated by the whispers of holy apparitions misconstrued as static. Jacob is the heathen with reason to grasp his brother’s heel and deceive him. The treason to sit up to stand down to kiss the hem of the gown of whatever clown performs a pretty act while he’s in town. The frowns expound and expand for the man whose body spans the sand of the holy land.
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2
GO FOR JEUNE! - darts for charcoal. Jeune boy is compassionate, secure, loving. What more could a girl want? Charcoal. Charcoal boy is mad. Boy, is he unhealthy, inconsiderate, hurtful, hateful. Full of everything but love for me Choose wisely. Self-flagellation anyone? Because I can suffocate and choke myself on charcoal, I push jeune away in a bout of responsibility.
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Jan 27, 2019
Jan 27, 2019 at 7:58 PM UTC
Everytime a choice: Jeune or Charcoal.
Upside down is my right side up With too-thin skin, splayed legs and lips ****** of substance, I lie quietly on rumpled sheets. a word some say that I've said too much: s-o-r-r-y sorry sorry sorry It loses sincerity when uttered often, but I am sorry, I haven't said it enough. is my chagrin charming? is my self-deprecation darling? (no response) I'm told (insert compliment). I believe it, I have heard. I both love and loathe myself. ************ and flagellation, brought on by the same hand penance, paid; insatiable, still Just sit, ****** and watch a martyr at work.
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May 1, 2013
May 1, 2013 at 1:29 AM UTC
Cross of St. Peter
Sketch me, draw me in your mind, project me onto your canvas. colour me, releasing the unquiet, make me your, unprecedented piece, an ongoing life work, perfecting all impurities, eradicate all self-flagellation, espouse a new desire, akin to Basil's obsession, The Picture of Dorian Gray, infatuation lends to disillusion, pursuing, hedonistic pleasures, soul baring to all sin, intentions to please, exonerate myself entirely, you promised redemption, not further damnation, I'm Narcissus trapped, between, painted reflections of self, dying a thousand times, devoted & absconded trust, pulling it out, hand in chest, blood,            *poured                     poured                                                    poured*                         as Lector serves, killings, you feasted on my heart, with the same delight. © Sia Jane
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May 18, 2014
May 18, 2014 at 4:29 PM UTC
Cannibal
Soot and ashes are the platter from which I dine, the pool of my flagellation is the outpouring Merlot. I forget to breathe through the lash, rending the sackcloth until my nakedness is set before you. The bells harken, the pendulum keeps time, my requiem is set by your pulse. DO NOT dismiss me, DO NOT neglect to render my salvation in parcels. Level after level of purgatory the holy grail I imbibe and drink in ruin. As the shredding of my skin with filaments of rope, dislplay a journey of persecutions selfless ardor. Crouching I beseech, I grovel, forming steepled hands. Oh, humble penance slips my parched tongue and crippled lips. Sweet King, Soveriegn Lord, Merciful Master, I cower in my nothingness, wrapped in the robes of bleak shame. STILL I PRESS FORTH, through decadent chambers, in filth for a glimpse of your being. For the simple gesture of uttering your name. Does your crown sweat with the bulk of my sobs? To wipe your brow, smear your worries on my bodice. Enticing you from your throne to love... a slave.
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Sep 7, 2012
Sep 7, 2012 at 9:47 AM UTC
A Moment of Devotion
It always starts in the head lay face down on the bed my cover pulled over my head dissecting myself every mistake Distrust runs riot all ego led patterning plans my wings clipped; they deem me a flight risk Self flagellation my own whipping boy mortifying flesh; *Lord, forgive me for my sins* My body pays penance mauled; flesh laid bare and, I trace with fingers tram lines of forgiveness Overly thinking, all inside my mind is unfocused war zones of clambering disasters Guilt further fed; satiated by stealing my breaths from cushions that smoother I can't breathe There is a deep, resounding stillness a calm before the storm inside & outside landscapes swirl as I, fight to unpin myself from that to which I'm so tightly woven. © Sia Jane
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Feb 4, 2015
Feb 4, 2015 at 9:17 PM UTC
The Crawl
They call it guilt, John. That's what the voice in the dark of the night, would always whisper upon me. But I was deaf, so I would never hear it. Oh, it's just what they'll all say, "It's not your fault", That your brother died, That you're a broken husk of a man. Worry not, worry not, fair snakeskin, fair caterpillar, surely you, too, will shed your skin and fly, fly away. But he doesn't get to fly now does he? No all he exists is, as a sad, cold face, dead, under the refraction of light, that pool's death gleams. Hmm, but you enjoy this don't you, John, the voice said to me. The tragic backstory, the shameless reason. For such gleeful ecstasy, surerly, The small price of the lie called brother, of innocence, of life, of something you never really had, something you never really lose, what an even sacrifice, John, what a fair toll, in fact how favored are you, to so enjoy, self-flagellation. I won't tell if you won't, she says, whispered. Why always a she and who? It finishes anyways; whether I want it to... Spencer died, So I can have, my whip in hand. That is my truth.
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Mar 21, 2017
Mar 21, 2017 at 12:03 PM UTC
Whip In Hand
I ravaged the vaults and came back empty Nothing shall worry me today Yes, i even looked for troubles and woes No, nothing shall worry me today Self flagellation used to be the norm But not today, surprisingly Self doubt evaporated, steam it became Yes today, surprisingly It feels grand to be renewed, vigor and strong Into tomorrow this truth shall be And every face that kept me dark and weak No place it has, in tomorrow as the new truth shall be He, she, and they, can forget i ever cared Inconsequential beings of yesterday And let them rot as i ascend, high and bright over Inconsequential beings of many yesterdays
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May 23, 2015
May 23, 2015 at 8:37 AM UTC
No place in my tomorrow
i'm unwinding my head on honey moon belly ******* carnivorous lozenges falling in love with glazed eye ball devils hypnotic stare destination a tunnel of fiendish odysseys blood drooling eel vomits gush white daddy long leg threads in honeys wet cage to wither writhing spit hot in fat muscle and bone headless head first like a mindless falcon after scattered mice i feel her teeth tearing syringes of ecstasy ransacking swollen motion spirals and ***** like bronz buckaroos at a fancy pool party crimson *** macabre ****** roast bon bon fire licking her lump of desire a rousing boogyman sermon speaks in incinerating tongues swallowing a hideous parfait **** growl girl squat **** **** mint julip throat choke symphony abducting lascivious pollinated gulps take me in like reckless bull sap through your red dada warp land pit of the brain undulant flesh landscape of shapeless ovule spume mouthing night blows Incised flagellation's devour buffet spread maiden derelict arched and trembling drunk and drugged like a buttermilk sky groaning hysterical in feral muck stained beds of puce and slime ochre pigments stunned umbra a famished deep veined jutting peninsula longing for princess ***** dynasties with vast thighs radiating inferno hearths and rolling hill **** hieroglyphics decipher rug pugilist lap songs my goddess i long for your bruised fruit crawling like the dead of night on pitch vanta shadows where love becomes a savage
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Aug 23, 2019
Aug 23, 2019 at 1:26 PM UTC
DAda Warp Land ...Ero **** Poetry
you’ll never feel the bite of pain that tears the skin from bone nor the aching loneliness that scares the heart from home the absoluteness that leaves a hole where nothing is able to hide while driven by the loathing birthing a life to the love inside no matter what the circumstance you can’t negate the absolute horror of wanting what is begged for there is no returning the honor I’ll whip my self unmercifully until the end of a perfect day even while you subjugate me my scars upon myself just say how much you intended to deny me all twisted parts upon me are a whole crisscrossed upon my body are the marks that give you access to my soul
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Mar 3, 2012
Mar 3, 2012 at 7:05 AM UTC
self flagellation
when i begin to free-wheel and shudder with contempt i take comfort in the thought that we are mostly born to fail. honey-slow days are steeped in loss, marinated in missed opportunities sweetly whistling tunes that pipe "all is well because all will be, regardless." my life might have no payoff to the meandering silk i weave and death could prove a hostel, relief from what i was born to carry. effort always looks to me like a lack of priorities while i jealously guard potential and covet their delusions. i'm a coward gently born to soft beds and microchips and indulgence of my worst self when i am too afraid to move. i am worried i am a narcissist for wanting to keep breathing soon picnics and parties become noble acts proof of love through self-flagellation. i've heard that poets see farther but i don't even know metric units so how can i tell anyone how far ahead the beginning begins and the end ends?
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May 24, 2013
May 24, 2013 at 5:09 AM UTC
all will be, regardless
Holding on to anger Is like self flagellation A tirade against peace Depriving the soul A dose of tranquility Leaving deep gashes within Bleeds in silence Overflowing the system Incarcerated heart Sitting on burning embers There’s a raging fire Burning down the peace Only ashes shall remain Smeared over the Remnants, of what life was
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Feb 6, 2015
Feb 6, 2015 at 11:34 AM UTC
Vexing Matter
"I should" a solemn voice in the head is all grumble, dutiful with condemnation, a heavy oppression. desirous flight is persuaded to stay afoot by what it should: a culturally defined, mental- artifact, of what one supposedly must, oft devoid of one can- will, but won't, out of fear. doubt, like chains on dreams, easily persuades the mind into mundane plains of guilt ridden sorrows, cut out by knives of shame, choking the present tense of what shall, strapped in and unfulfilled, hollow and holding, like an anchor in a reservoir of regretful undertakings, sticky with ought, fierce like flagellation lashing, imprisoning visions: victimized       by expectations,                 negations of choice:                              stomping on the souls good will,                              starving the free heart,                              shackling the mind. operations from a place complacent with banality and viciousness in some quiet take over          some woe of status-quo       waging with shaky scaffolding    and the numbing    dumb         timber of nothing a dull aching noise . enough.   turn off:    the over beaten       dead skull             thumping   with outside pressure                 be silent               to hear                                 there is an inner music more in tune with life than anything you've been told by the force of should or should not.
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Mar 22, 2014
Mar 22, 2014 at 2:42 AM UTC
the battle of should
"I should" a solemn voice in the head is all grumble, dutiful with condemnation, a heavy oppression. desirous flight is persuaded to stay afoot by what it should: a culturally defined, mental- artifact, of what one supposedly must, oft devoid of one can- will, but won't, out of fear. doubt, like chains on dreams, easily persuades the mind into mundane plains of guilt ridden sorrows, cut out by knives of shame, choking the present tense of what shall, strapped in and unfulfilled, hollow and holding, like an anchor in a reservoir of regretful undertakings, sticky with ought, fierce like flagellation lashing, imprisoning visions: victimized       by expectations,                 negations of choice:                              stomping on the souls good will,                              starving the free heart,                              shackling the mind. operations from a place complacent with banality and viciousness in some quiet take over          some woe of status-quo       waging with shaky scaffolding    and the numbing    dumb         timber of nothing a dull aching noise . enough.   turn off:    the over beaten       dead skull             thumping   with outside pressure                 be silent               to hear                                 there is an inner music more in tune with life than anything you've been told by the force of should or should not.
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74
As I maintain the whip, As I kneel upon the ground, I strike myself, not in sin, But as eternal man profound, - I grip the cat’o’nine-tails, Ever it has been sharper, I bless my back in welts and wails, Until I feel no longer. - Fifty lashes strong now, No sin had been committed, The longing to feel just something, For love to find, be fitted, - O’er and o’er I feel the sting O’er and o’er I’m branded, For the darkness inside of me, For the sorrow I’ve commanded. - Ninety lashes, still not feeling, Swelling, my tongue I’ve bitten, Until the hopelessness in my heart… Is dead and long be ridden. - Adrenaline coursing and still no pain, I’ve conquered all but you, The questions in my heart are somber, Your face in my mind is glued. - One hundred and twenty strokes now, And forever still seems far away, Overcoming this paradox, To curse this mental pain away. - I strive for physical touch of blade, For emotionally I am torn, I’ve felt nothing until you, Since the day I was born. - A wretched sense of memory, Caresses my cheek and I Rip apart myself with malice, For this nastalgia defied. - I wrap the shroud around me, The thin linnen to my flesh fuses, I tear it quickly without flinching Off my gashes and bruises. - Still nothing has fluttered, In the pain recepters, I wonder how my life could, Ever be this disevered. - It aches and moans with cracks and groans, My whip, serrated, ne’er faulters, My robe in flagellation, Lays down my blood at aulter. - One hundred and fifty after the shroud, I confess I could strike harder, Perhaps it decidedly best, If I think myself of fodder. - Nightmares are but where I dream, Yet dream of this, I don’t. If I were spied upon, I guess, They’d beg me stop, I won’t. - The shroud now soaked with blood and flesh And false hopes of years of rot, This punishment is not what it seems, It is not one to be fought. - The outline cry for oil dipped rope, Has not this pain be stopped, Moreso however I do fear, That your love for me has dropped.
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Jan 19, 2013
Jan 19, 2013 at 11:35 PM UTC
As I Maintain The Whip.
As I maintain the whip, As I kneel upon the ground, I strike myself, not in sin, But as eternal man profound, - I grip the cat’o’nine-tails, Ever it has been sharper, I bless my back in welts and wails, Until I feel no longer. - Fifty lashes strong now, No sin had been committed, The longing to feel just something, For love to find, be fitted, - O’er and o’er I feel the sting O’er and o’er I’m branded, For the darkness inside of me, For the sorrow I’ve commanded. - Ninety lashes, still not feeling, Swelling, my tongue I’ve bitten, Until the hopelessness in my heart… Is dead and long be ridden. - Adrenaline coursing and still no pain, I’ve conquered all but you, The questions in my heart are somber, Your face in my mind is glued. - One hundred and twenty strokes now, And forever still seems far away, Overcoming this paradox, To curse this mental pain away. - I strive for physical touch of blade, For emotionally I am torn, I’ve felt nothing until you, Since the day I was born. - A wretched sense of memory, Caresses my cheek and I Rip apart myself with malice, For this nastalgia defied. - I wrap the shroud around me, The thin linnen to my flesh fuses, I tear it quickly without flinching Off my gashes and bruises. - Still nothing has fluttered, In the pain recepters, I wonder how my life could, Ever be this disevered. - It aches and moans with cracks and groans, My whip, serrated, ne’er faulters, My robe in flagellation, Lays down my blood at aulter. - One hundred and fifty after the shroud, I confess I could strike harder, Perhaps it decidedly best, If I think myself of fodder. - Nightmares are but where I dream, Yet dream of this, I don’t. If I were spied upon, I guess, They’d beg me stop, I won’t. - The shroud now soaked with blood and flesh And false hopes of years of rot, This punishment is not what it seems, It is not one to be fought. - The outline cry for oil dipped rope, Has not this pain be stopped, Moreso however I do fear, That your love for me has dropped.
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