......
It starts young
When they’re supposed to be having fun
But instead they cry
Not understanding why everyone lies
Or why everything hurts all the time
......

When he had rushed home from school
Walking through the house all alone
To feed his fish from the fair
Only to find it floating upside down,
Death was there.

When she had stared out her window
Glued to her binoculars for a good half hour
Just watching the animals outside the cabin
Only to see a bird ****** up and gobble on a hare,
Death was there

......
Surrounded by cruelty
Wondering who they’re supposed to be.
Growing up in a world
Where pain is constantly unfurled
Where nothing saves the doves
And everyone feels unloved
You live long enough one way
And soon there’s nothing else you can see or say.
......

When he had smiled softly
Knowing soon his heart would fill with glee.
For now bones creak and ache
All this life does is take
Watching the world around him
Knowing he’ll never be like them.
Aiming for the bottom of the building
Jumping down hoping
Knowing nothing is fair
And Death is there.

When she had been sobbing
So hard she ended up coughing
Staring at the bottle
Knowing she wouldn’t make it to the hospital
She swallowed a handful of pills
Before death she’d get her thrills.
In her final moments
Trudging through the thoughts and slowness
Knowing this world is full of despair
And Death is there.

You taught me to be like this
to be physically here and mentally there
You taught me to disappear from the face of the earth when i felt like it
to leave if that's what it takes
To retain my sanity.

You taught me to reflect
on the state of life mid-conversation
To never apologise because reflection
is not a sin and you'd be here
when i came back ready to hear
that I've changed my mind about
everything except you because
i can't bear
To be the intolerant type of person
that subscribes to labels and promotes
fear of love that comes in different shapes, forms and colours.

You taught me to be like this
You taught me to be ever-present but never-visible
You taught me it's okay to feel like this
Like i was shrouded in magic because i was so **** invisible
To everyone else except you because
"My love, this us-thing is not so simple", you said right after the i-love-you or at least i think so
I don't know. I zoned out for a while there but I'm sure you said so.

You taught be like this.
You taught me to hide in the spotlight
Because they can never come for me there.
You taught me to use the bright lights
as a distraction and they would never know that I'm gone you taught me to that dreaming is not only for the night
you said i could do it with my eyes wide open in the broad daylight in the middle of a demanding crowd.

You taught me to leave the way you did you left, but you called it reflection
Of the way things were things are things should be of perception of the way humans are humans should strive to be to be honest i felt like a distraction. Like you were meantfor bigger things than me but i didn't leave because you were a manifestation of everything life should be plus you said it was only "reflection".
And i could do it too because you'd be here when i got back
But you are not here
Why are you not here?
You're not here
Did i not hear you properly?
I'm sure i did.
You're not here and i can't hear the sound of your voice anymore so I'm always absent trying to reach you over there, in my mind.
But don't fault me you showed me this
You taught me to leave and you called it reflection because that's how you saw it i still see it as education
Because you taught me this.

I didn't want it to be this way
So I played safe and hid away

Those feelings deep down that I ignored
are now guests at my front door

Guess you could say that this is my fault
I just thought that this is how I'd adult

Doing what I please, saying "***** it, why not"
lead me to this day; it was a lesson to be taught.

please don't go
I was just getting used to you
simplicity and organic just isn't what I'm used to
it was so perfect not to worry about
when, where, or why
we just let it happen, no need to check time
I know you have to do this
and no looking back
I won't hold you captive, there's no sense in that
Just promise me this:
you'll never forget me
because you were the one who taught me to be me

often tough times taught us to write.






© pax

Images and instances from past
A few glimpses from past
As of now,
while in present,
everything in life is about what was taught in past keeping in mind a cause.
Time now to perform with regards to same.

Competition is a part of  life and will remain in life as long as life remains
No one is indispensible
Hence never take anything for granted because tomorrow might never come

In life's journey, we can all  be taught,
I am tolerant, more than I ought,
I always aim for some rapport,
Whether it makes one a doormat, or
Someone kind and reliable, what's more,
People pleasing is a bottomless pit,
I've done a great job, no time for hypocrites,
I am tolerant, more than I ought,
In life's journey, we can all be taught.....

You told me you'll be real,
You told me you're here to heal,

You told me you'll never lie,
You told me the truth is you're mine,
Its a lie.

You told me you'll always be by my side,
You told me not to fear anything, you told me you're with me in this ride,
You lied.