I’ll just paint a smile on my face, I’ll keep myself busy
I’ll play make believe that I’m okay,
I’m breaking under the weight, of being not okay!
I feel myself fading away.

I feel like I’ve been gone for a long time now,
My body is present, but I seem to be lost inside.
I used to love feeling everything I ever could.
But now I feel like I’m fading away.

It hurts me to say that I am not okay.
Letting everyone down hurts me more than they know.
It’s been tearing me apart,
The fact that I will never be all that they want me to be.

I know that I can’t keep living this way,
I know what will come if I do not make a change.
I’m buried under the weight of all the shame I’ve brought upon myself
And I know there’s no one to blame but me.

I fear I’ve faded away.

match lit,
flickering,
growing,
swaying,
dancing,
glowing,
melting,
melting,
melting,
fading,
subsiding,
snuffed out.

I was starving,
yet I couldn't eat.
Little did I know,
I was deprived of happiness,
and that was just the start.
I had been hiding,
in work, food and lies.
Telling myself I just needed a nap.
I need happiness, I need to speak,
I have to write.




slowly

                  my
                                 hunger





                                                     ­                 f       a          d      e          s

i am the moon
you are the sun
crossing paths
but always fading away