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Sehar 3d
i know what love is
love is pain.


love is handing them the knife to slash at your chains
but hoping they
don't stab you in
the back.


love is disappointment

it is waiting up for messages never sent
hoping someone remembers
to remember you.


Love is a word over spent
very seldom meant
its the arrow of Cupid that kills you.
its an emotion that disappears
after it catches you unaware
its the want not the need that fills you
both elixir and poison
the apocalypse in the horizon
the fear of the loss that thrills you.
the walls not the bridges
the cuts not the stitches
the fire and the thirst that wills you.
love just is.
I'm Aurianna.
I'm so many things actually, it all depends on who you ask.
To myself... at times I am destruction.
My emotions destroy.
I am hurt.
I am only 18, who did you want me to be?
You abused me.
You destroyed me for a time, and yet still all the time.
I want to be free.
Did I build these chains link by link or did you help me?
You beat me physically while she beat me mentally.
The perfect destructive team you two made.
All without realizing.
All without each other.
Yet at times I am strong, I stand tall to protect others.
Although a single person can raise their voice to me and I shatter into a million little pieces.
I never amount to other peoples expectations of me, so in return, I am looked down upon.
My whole life really.
The secret abuse that led to many failures.
I have so many problems that I cannot fathom enough to put into words.
I fail at expressing how I feel because I don't know how.
You never taught me how.
They ask me whose fault it is that I am like this.
I say it's mine.
Why?
Because I'm eighteen.
In the eyes of the law, I am officially an adult.
Responsible for only myself.
Am I falling apart yet again?
Or have I never actually been quite pieced together?
Do I accept your screaming, dehumanizing comments and threats for the hope that someday, just someday I will be granted parental affection?
Or do I not deserve that either?
Do I deserve better?
Because I really don't know.
You're sorry... that I know.
You have said it many times before.
Only to turn around and do the same things you've already apologized for.
Feeling is what makes me human, but too much of anything is cancer to the heart.
Your words hurt me.
They always have.
Worse than any beating I have and will endure.
Your words are my cancer.
I am fighting for my freedom.
With or without you.
For I have always been alone.
I have found my strength in that.
Because I am me.
Breaking chains, drenched in the rain.

I’m Sitting
Waiting
Thinking
Drinking
Decaying
Breaking
Shaking
Unshackling
A step
Two more
Bright
Open sky
Cloudy
Smells like
Lilac, lavender
metallic Feast
Flowers
The scent
Intoxicating
Tormenting
Corroding
Blackening
Darker
Hiding now
Colors
Fading
I’m losing
Hiding in Crates
Dying, Empty
Emotionless
Instinct... Animalistic
How basic
How human like,
Cowering in the sight of
Ones reflection
How sad,
How detestable
Grotesque
I’ve become what I fear
“Myself.”
Matt Sol Jan 20
Had I been there
never lately
everything is
ever changing
everything is
over rated
a unique sense
of desperation
nothing less could
satiate this
nothing less could
alleviate us
Irina BBota Jan 23
Don't want any songs of a gun,
don't want to hurt anyone,
don't want any endless run
no more. I've had enough. I'm done.

No more indomitable tease,
no more spirits in chains like these,
no more falling on our knees,
don't want any war, no more, please.

Don't want any debt to the danger,
don't want a family picture with me as a stranger,
don't want to be haunted down by a ranger
no more. This is major.

No more unreasonable favours,
no more not knowing the food's flavours,
no more fighting with the neighbours,
don't want any more bodies arranged in layers.

Don't want any legion just for feeding my pride,
don't want any more crossroads inside,
don't want my happiness to be denied
no more. Too many people had died.
Johnny walker Jan 16
If only Helen could lay her hands upon me now she'd
take my pain of heartache
away
So my soul could be set free from the chains that weigh me down the chains of the everyday struggles of life
Those chains I've dragged around with me all my
life but never seem able to break free the chains of all my wrongs In
life
that have dragged me so low, or Is It I'm cursed to carry these chain for the rest of my days but each day they get
heavier
If she could lay her hands on me now she would free my soul and take the pain of heartache away
Marwa Jan 14
I can’t take this pain
they tell me to not complain
you are here to entertain
I am just a woman whose trapped in chains.
My whole world is pouring rain
guess I can’t differentiate raindrops from tears
my mind is unclear,
tell me, am I going insane?
It’s not easy to explain
why I keep feeling this way
again,
and again,
and again.
Astral Dec 2018
I hate being held down,
Or someone thinking they have control over me.
It makes my knuckles twinge,
And my face burn.

Why would someone else control me,
Want to tell me what to do,
I don't even control me.
So who, in fact, are you?

You aren't my mother,
You aren't my father,
You're merely a friend.
But don't get me wrong, I don't want our friendship to end.

But it feels like you're smothering me,
Trying to chain me down,
Rip off my wings,
Or ****** down my crown.

But I won't let that happen,
So I'll cut the chains you've tried to use,
And I'll keep my wings above your reach,
And I will hold my head high,
And I will guard my crown.
Always try to remember to do the last two lines, hold your head high and gaurd your crown.
Quotedbykayla Dec 2018
Yearned is thy cheerfulness to wax
a particle within thee,
however,
stuck be not
Quotedbykayla Dec 2018
She sharpened blades,
turning her head as she engraved
thou blistered name
into her delicate flesh
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