Am I good enough?
I'm no longer certain
I think I'm becoming a beast of burden

Am I rough enough
Am I tough enough
I'm too blind to see
I know I have feelings but I can barely stand
The weight of them upon my shoulders
and bring broken... again and again

Am I likable... loveable even?
I keep asking myself this
All of my relationships keep turning into something onto which a camel wouldn't spit

Am I worth it?
Am I hurting?
Am I breaking?

I swear I've been asking myself this all day...

I swear my mind goes into some strange places
Especially when I know I'm not feeling aces
Just When I'm alone I get to overthinking my life
I mean stressing over things that really aren't my problem
I keep stressing over someone else's burdens, wondering how I can solve them

It's strange that I let my brain get not enraged but engaged with others pain
It's like I'm outside with an umbrella and it's sunny but I just have to find someone's rain
It's driving me insane because I don't like overthinking
Things that aren't my concern but it burns
for me to learn that my musings weren't correct...

it's Things like this that make remember my earlier says as a reject

Maybe I don't sleep with anything with a pulse
maybe I don't 15 kids in the vault
maybe I'm not what people expect me to be
maybe I'm different... isn't that crazy?
Maybe I'm not for a one night stand
maybe I want to around my girl build plans
maybe I want to take long walks on the beach
build sand castles, sit around and snuggle while we watch movies

Maybe I'm sorry, I'm a helpless romantic
I want to do this for someone and it drives me almost pedantic
I mean I'm the yin to an jerkoffs yang
maybe I just need to get out more
come back to my house smelling like *** and regret, or just become a manwhore
I mean the nice guy act may have been good 5 or ten years ago...

Maybe I have to be an ***, that's the only way to go

Theres a rose in the garden that's been through a storm
Its hurt and small now but it seems so worn
Its gone through the wringer but still it stands
Exciting no one it makes no demands but it
Amazes me how to this day
One little rose can turn no one away.

He's isolated on a distant world
Far away from what we know
He's gone and left his favorite girl
He's marooned just to show

How life can curve and twist away
To bend and shaped and shift
Though some would have life the same always
To avoid an emotional rift

Between me and you what we both hold
Dear to us and hpw we are the same
Though shooting stars may break the mold
Our hearts aren't to blame

For hurting when we hurt, crying when we cry
Breaking when we break and lifting us up high
For changing when we change for holding us in check
And for when we are nervous jumping up to our necks

An uncut diamond is like a person,
The have more flaws than things that
Draw them to other people but
Much a diamond all of us need a jeweler to
Cut away these flaws so we can be seen
For the priceless gems that we are
Here to add beauty to a dark and depressing
World in flames where almost nothing stays the same
But true love and friendships and even thoughs
Are questionable at best

Belly oF the Beast
if you don’t know my story you’ll be eaten like a Christmas feast but sometimes life is like walking straight into a hideous ugly beast
you swallow the fear that builds in your throat then you Swallow so much you start to ******* choke You wipes those little beads of sweat from your brow
As you walk inside the mind of something that’s trying to find the weakness you have to hide This is what drives us to make crazy choices amnd even though you don’t want to you keep hearing voices and noises that no one else hears
Until the torment has ended and you lie on your face stone cold scavengers now interested in your remains you once had a future but now it’s plain to see so goodbye oh and at your funeral enjoy watching your friends and loved ones cry

Hello ladies and gentlemen
This is Blitzen calling for the world to hear
It seems like Santa won't be making the trip this year
But you'll still get your gifts, of that you don't need to have fear

Now you may be asking, what's causing this delay
Well that's where Mrs. Claus Comes into play
Every year he makes the trip and at home she stays
So this year she changed things up, yesterday she wore Santa's favorite outfit
And laid on their bed
she called for her husband like she was trying to raise the dead
He came into the room and with a great surprise
She was wet and willing with a ***** look in her eyes,
She jumped on her man as if she were insane
and began slurping on his candy cane

So sorry people of earth, especially kids with frowns
But some pretty nasty stuff is going down
So don't worry kids when Santa gets out of bed
he'll bring all the presents so don't you fret!

I'm grateful for my family in ink I think that I'd be insane in the brain I was a lyrical lame now I found I can spit bars with the best they pushed me to the brink beyond my limits I'm in this for life Drs Joke, Midnight Writer, Blue Star with the heart and Cashby, Natasha, Mandy Nothing could tear my poetic family apart we argue and have our issues but it's solved within so we can continue to become stronger as people and as lyricists while I split heads as the poetic mafia axe murderer I'll serve ya like a platter cut your *** like class and watch ya brains splatter all other emcees better scatter poetic blades out and slice and dice like vanilla ices career ending faster like the flash while we make a splash in poetic pools of blood it's like we opened up a dam with a creative flood

Let me start off with a story that's pretty easy to tell

Boy Meets Girl
Boy and girl talk
Boy and girl become friends
Girl is already dating someone but it's fine
Girl gets heartbroken
Boy sticks by her and cheers her up
Girl is thankful for support
Boy develops crush
Boy is confused, he has feelings but doesn't want to hurt the friendship
Boy finally decides to tell girl how he feels
Girl responds with "I like you but not like that"
Boy, naturally hurt, decides to stay around, thinking he'll have a chance with her.
Girl dates another guy.. gets heartbroken
Boy plays crying shoulder again
The cycle repeats himself
Boy finally gives up on girl and moves on.
Boy Meets another girl, Girl he had crush on realizes that he would've been husband material had she seen it
Boy and girl never speak, wondering what would've been.

So ladies take a small lesson from this story
If you're looking for someone to appreciate all your glory
If you want someone to appreciate the happiness in your space
most of the time, what you're looking for
is right in front of your face.

Is Justice Really Blind?
Or can she truly see
My skin tone, my ***** hair
what makes me.. really me?

Is the fact that I'm black
Is my every single action an act
of violence or hatred for my fellow man
or can that statement I retract?

Can I fit outside
a created stereotype
can I be myself and remember my roots
can my race and the world, call a truce

My skin may be different but my organs the same
I didn't pick my ancestry, so choice isn't too blame
Can I turn back time... can I change my race
just do in this world I can have a chance.. a better place?

I've been aching for some action
a lot not just a fraction
my ****** desires are all pent up
I try to ignore it but they won't let up

I wanna watch you strip your clothes off
or maybe wear some lingerie
Maybe take a long silk robe off
whatever you want to wear today

I've been craving your sweet body
your curves so angelic and voluptuous
God how I want to devour your sweet sweet hole
it must taste so scrumptious

It's been driving me crazy
the thought of you beside me in bed
Me right on top of you
thrusting until I'm spent

Me pounding on your lady parts
like they're late on the tent
Bending you over and taking you from behind
your *****, so soft and wet

You laying me beside the fireplace
wearing that long silk robe again
you bouncing on me until you release
just keep going, until you can no longer stand

Oh how I've been aching
to let these desires play out
like I said it's been driving me crazy
it's like I'm living in a virginity induced drought

what are you truly afraid of. don't be shy spit it out
we all have fear, that's not in any doubt
Are you afraid, of heights, snakes or dogs, cats maybe? bugs? or the occasional frog?
what about tight spaces, lonely areas or clown faces?
come along son I haven't got all day,
drop your guard and let's play
you won't get anywhere if alone your burdens you bear
what are you fearing right now... I won't judge you I swear.

What am I afraid of? that's an interesting question
And I thank you for asking in this interview session
Not to many things cause me to shake in fright
I dislike tight spaces but they don't give me the shakes
I'm creeping out by clowns but not just the face
I guess the only things on this earth I'm truly afraid of
Are loving with no purpose, just being someone's favorite doll
The only other fear that I care to mention
Is if one of these writings of my invention
doesn't touch someone, in some way shape or form
I'd hate too write for no reason, it's like not facing a Dawn

I Can barely put up with this ****** frustration
that can't be cured any longer, with furious *******
it's like every one but me across this great nation
has known the flesh of another, it's like mental castration
to not know the taste of a woman's flesh
To caress her body while fondling her ample *******
To drunkenly sup from her womanly cup
Am I going to die alone? is that my plan from above?

Now I know that my body is supposed to be sacred
But I can just barely, just barely take it
That primal instinct, that feeling deep in my bones
to finally live out the ****** desires of my own
The stigma that's with a guy who's the age of 18
"Ohh you're still a ******? get out there and drink lean!"

I'd be lying if I said I didn't still have feelings for you but maybe not on the level that I did

TBH there's a lot between us that we kept hidden and I expressed what I could through what was written you took it the wrong way and with your heart it seemed like I played you did the same to my feelings that same day

I'd be lying if I said I didn't still want an us

TBH I got the shaft from love and fate maybe that's what kept it from happening between us I wasn't in love or lust but that bind we had between it seems is what drove me to my feelings.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't attached

TBH it ate me up but I hid it well we weren't a couple so I tried to be cool when you said another dude near you explored your body warm and supple but it broke my heart in half because I wanted that title but no matter how I tried you couldn't see what I contained inside for you


boy it feels good confessing my feelings and sins
it's nowhere near healthy keeping this bottled up within

I swear I'm dateable!
well that's debatable
because I'm a complete nerd with a bad record, yeah that's relatable

Anyway I might as well put my cards on the table
I'm a poet but you know this but I'm currently available
I'm unswayable, once I'm yours I'm yours
I **** at making first moves but I'll gladly open doors

Texts every morning? you got that
Want food? I'll go out of my way to buy that
Bad day? on my chest you can lay or in between your legs My tounge can play while I get rid of that headache
Need to cry? I'll be by your side
Cramping? heating pads n chocolate I'll provide...

Now ladies you may wonder... why have all my choices been so rotten?
Speaking for guys like me.. we don't get out too often.

NERDS!

Now if there's one thing i hate about society
it's that they're always saying what we should try to be
To me life is more than trying to make money
profits shouldn't control everything,  but they do, i find that funny.

What happened to just loving yourself and others
What happened to respecting our sisters and brothers
If skin tones weren't an issue, imagine how the world would be
if your beliefs didn't cause hysteria and conflict, where would we all be?

Well, I'm simply a poet, but I can at least dream of this
A world where we live for love...that's my greatest wish :)

To my ladies with a little extra meat on your bones
There's no reason you should cry or think you'll forever be alone!
If you don't have a Barbie doll waist
and if you have a bit more jelly in every place
You know what that means, you have a whole lot more ****, and when you were built to contain
All of the love, passion, and ****! that's what you were built to maintain!

Now to quote the late great Freddie Mercury
His music is something I hold very dear to me
And this is dedicated to my thick women with style by the pound
and I quote, "Fat Bottomed Girls you make the rockin world go round!"

The bell rings
The inner fire sings
Burning hotter than ever
If you're around me I wouldn't recommend a sweater
I was stuck for a long time, I needed a doctor
My brethren in Ink stood by me, like an exam procter

So for all the crying and whining I put you guys through
thank you, for sticking by me when I didn't know what to do.
No more depression, no more pain.
I can't promise all Sunshine, I know there will be rain

But NeroameeAlucard, the true me is returning once again
I'm standing taller than ever, Prouder, stronger, because, well I've been down to the bottom.

I'M BACK!

Hello, I'm nobody
I wish I could become someone
but I guess that won't happen
my minds exploded
damaged or dead making repair
Almost impossible

Again, like I said I'm nobody
so I guess no one will notice
If I take  myself away.
Not ending myself but shutting down
never Again to know the light of day

I said before I wish I was someone
people cared about
But I said before, I'm nobody
and that no one will ever doubt

Sometime special
you'll meet someone worth your mettle
that makes your heart whistle and Boil like a hot kettle

Someone special
that causes a physical pain without
that when the rains around they're your drought
It took me a while to figure this out

That daytime could be more than worth seeing
dreaming out every single day you'll be meeting
Loving every second of their company
aching when they're away

yes.. only someone truly special can make you feel this way

I'm not letting this friendship die
for anything, I was hurt but those tears have cried
I'm not losing my best friend
to something that didn't need to happen
you wanted someone else, if I was mature I would've accepted that
but I had to be a spoiled brat and make you feel like crap

If you hate me that's fine. I can't say that I blame you
I still care about you and I never want to defame you
I bared parts of my soul to squeeze
to you that no one would ever hope to see
I told you everything, the good and the bad
You were the one thing that kept me from being sad but glad to go forth and keep going like a rolling stone painted black another day

so please please, don't go away.

Hmm... tonight I'm feeling frisky
and we wanna do something risky
How about you pick the room this time?

Kitchen, Stairway, The basement
the backyard, Maybe even the closet
Our even outside the house, it's your night to call it

We could go to the restaurant, and I could eat you under the table
Or Maybe even the library, we could reenact Aphrodite's fable

Or Maybe even the local coffee shop
we can sip our tea and then you could go down on me
Or even at the botanical garden
we could explore our passion in the roses
While your legs I spread apart and
then we could lie in the flowers strikingly naked
So come on babe, pick the room, so we can explore
I mean we've had *** before
so we might as well try something more

Thank you very much
for teaching me feelings are a crutch
for educating me to how my dreams will get crushed

Thank you for enlightening me
to get rid of my heart you see!
It's simply nothing more than a tool
others use to hurt you you fool!

Thank You for forging my armor
to make me stronger for much longer
opening up it seems will just get me hurt
so thank you for forging it, you did admirable work

Thank you for killing my once happy self
the world was trying but it just needed help
now I have all the happiness of a caged elf
or a nobleman lacking in wealth

Heartless is what I've become
thanks to you
a ******* that cares about no one
is what you drove me away from you

I thought my emotions have me strength
my feelings a super power
now I see people will go to any length
to crush them into a powder

So my feelings are dead in the back seat
along with my happy go lucky self
they've only brought me pain and defeat
so I place them permanently on the shelf

The only thing that matters now
is chasing down my dreams
I'd say you'll miss me when I'm gone
but you don't care it seems

So sayonara human feelings
you put up an admirable fight
but love never got thru the glass ceiling
and only betrayed me at dawn's light

Someone once told me that you'd wash away my sins,
Take away the pain and make me feel good about the skin I'm in.
So if you can here me honestly I don't know how
Or why I'm even worth it, which is why I'm writing this now
Can you hold me? can you love me which has no worth here?
Can you take away my pain?
Can you turn away my rain?
please I know I've been weak and flawed
I know I've kicked scratched and clawed
for the wrong things in life, and in love just to find some sense of power


But I was wondering, Lord, can you hold me now?

Forever Alone is probably my fate
because I only found one that I'd be more than happy to call my mate
She would've been treated like a queen
And I'm being Oh so sincere
Idve treasured her so previously
And held her so dear.

But these are the pangs of unreturned affection
be careful where your heart goes it's prone to misdirection
I finally got up the nerve to tell her how I feel
she let me down easy, said she didn't want distance
I just wanted a girlfriend worth a ****,
But maybe that's not what I'm meant for it's

Like I get knocked down, or kicked around
no one sees the tears behind my mask of a clown
underneath my laughter lies years upon years of pain
Love forever eludes me
Cupid Probably laughs in my face, and spits on my head
knowing I'll be alone when they find me dead.

No you wouldnt
I'dve been there like the police when a black kid loiters
Never would I have exploited ya
I can heal fast but this'll take time
**** it. **** it. If only you could've been mine
Idve held you like a queen, Cleopatra over Egypt
But you couldn't see what beats in my chest it's like when I try I get shot down
Every time I opened up I get shot to the ground
I guess I'm stuck alone on my own a king with no queen to share a throne

My fate is sealed I'm giving up for good
I'm gonna be the loneliest ******* in my hood
Now I'm gonna do what all plan B guys
Get back to crying in my pit, my sanctuary and my curse
That I've now described so accurately in that verse

This may be the worst I've ever jotted down
But I guess you never see the sadness behind the mask I wear, as the clown.

What To do
what to do
My mind is feeling blue

what to do
what to do
I don't want anybody but you

what to do
what to do
you said you wanted to be alone so I wasn't talking to you

what to do
what to do
I surely am missing you

what to do
what to do
I'm trying, but I can't get thru to you

what to do
what to do
I want to be an us, a me and you

What To do
what to do
I just wanna hold you

what to do
what to do
you know how I feel about you....

what can I do?

"If it may please the court...
ladies and gentlemen of the jury.
I'd like to testify on behalf of my client."
"Go ahead. but make it quick."
"thanks judge."

Now I'd be lying if I said
that my client is perfect
he's made mistakes and earned his stripes
like a fighter on the circuit
But his mistakes have taught him
more than a school ever could
he's been thru it all in his city
No pity he seeks all he wants is redemption
life hasn't been kind to him like it hasn't been to you
we've both swapped stories about our ****** up times
two broken souls meeting....

Look at his track record he's been nothing but loyal, he'll treat anyone who catches his fancy as if she's royal
Want him to plant something? show him the soil
Bad day, he'll sing you a cheesy love song
cuddle you close, when he's got to go somewhere he'll always bring you along
Cramping that day? that's a non issue
providing heating pads chocolate and a teddy bear
texting while you're gone saying I miss you
and like Prince all he wants is to kiss you

All he's asking for here is a chance
Let him prove himself for once, let him go to the dance.

Today I woke up smiling
for the first time in a long time
nothing bad I'd gone through
was running thru my mind
All that was there was positive
all the good times I've lived
All the fun things I did
It's like my past is behind me
dead and buried
I can move on from everything now
it doesn't seem so scary
life isn't always a walk among roses
so take the good with the bad in healthy doses :)

Okay here goes.

A lot of people ask why I put my pen to the page
Put my heart into words that don't inspire or engage
Well I write because I know I haven't had the perfect life
And I know others out there can attest to that tonight
But to get to the point I picked up my pen
I was the tender young age of 3 years plus 10
I had a crush on a girl, and it was killing me inside
I couldn't take it anymore, my feelings I could no longer hide
I finally got my nerve, and told her how I felt
I didn't know the rough hand I'd be dealt.
I got teased relentlessly, with no qualms on the matter
my heart was ripped out, against the floor I felt it splatter,
ever since I've found it hard to open up,
except through these words I've found solace and as such
I dedicated my pen to those kids that ever got picked on or hurt
NeroameeAlucard did it, you can drag your name from the dirt

Ladies, us nice guys have a question
why is it we all end up as plan B as opposed to the main interest?
I'm not the most attractive, or the most perfect
But at least I try, whereas half the guys out there aren't worth it

I know, part of the curse of being nice
is remaining lonely more often than the guy who's colder than ice
it's like I've tried my best every time I've ever dated
but every single time I get up enough courage
"I love how your such a sweetheart but I'm talking to someone"
Now you might be thinking don't be discouraged there's someone out the for you and she'll be more than worth it.

Well, I've waited and waited and waited some more
I've been patient and kindhearted, but it's like I'm such a bore
Am I simply a burden? A back up plan if it doesn't work out?
Or am I beast? ostracized by the world and casted out?

Am I so mean spirited that no one would dare provide me affection?
Am I so unappealing to the body and mind that looking my way causes disintegration?
What is it? I'll change, I know that I can

The curse of being the nice guy.. we always finish last.

What do you do when your smiles gone south
for the winter and you can't find the words to describe with you mouth
how you feel, when you get kicked while you're down
when every time you've come out of the shadows, something, or someone, knocks you down
Now I know I haven't been the perfect saint
I've been around, I don't pray much, I curse too much for goodness sake
But try as I might I can't get back up
I've given all I had, my body wants to give up.
My soul is crying after years of insecurity
Lord, please, I beg you, cast it from me.
All my pain, all my inequities, all my hurts and my wrongs
I know life isn't easy but I've carried them far too long
Please, give me the strength, the will, to get back up again.
I'm through going it alone, I need a friend

Lips Red, like an aged fine wine
Hair long and silky,
God she looks Divine,
Skin so smooth like a car, fresh off the line
Man oh man I wish she was mine
I'm crushing hard, in case you couldn't tell
Not saying so would be a lie I would never be able to sell
But who? Who? I'll never tell ;)

I find myself at the watering hole
aiming to drown my sorrow
I drank until I knew I was
going to feel it tomorrow

Out of reflex I looked down the bar
and what did my eyes take in
A long cool woman in a dark red dress
A siren, in stunning scarlet.

I drank in her features and summoned some courage, I had the bar ask what she was nursing
"****** Mary" I the waiter said as he passed me by he said she was also violently cursing

I bought her a drink and Sat back down
Watching the Blackhawks game
When shockingly enough she crept up behind me and asked me for my name

"Nero, I don't wish to be rude but I just had my heart snapped in two"
"Funny, the same thing happened to me, so whatever shall we do?"

I downed the last bit of whiskey then said
"I know this may sound risky but how about instead of going to our shared beds we go to a hotel instead?"

"Right to the point, I see," she said as she nursed that ****** Mary.
"How about this, I'll do you one better,
Right in the alley, it's warm and you won't need a sweater, it'll be hot enough with me"

laughing softly I said with quickness
"We both seem to suffer from ****** sickness, the alley then shall be our destination
to practice passion without hesitation.

so she walked outside, swaying her hips
I sat and watched, licking my lips, I paid the barkeep, her tab and mine
then proceeded to walk outside,

I arrived at the alley across the street
and what sight should my eyes first meet
this same siren, hitched up her dress,
her slender body she gently caressed

I began to kiss her with some of my passion
thinking "How in the Heck did this happen?"
She must have read my mind because she said
"empty those thoughts out of your head
My name is M, if that's all right
you know it well by the end of the night

The worst feeling is loving someone
and them loving you back
but because they've been so distant
you don't know where their heart is at
Love is so tricky
even when your numb, desperate or picky.
sometimes it works with me, other times against
But still I'd take this woman, over any old *****.
I guess, no wait I really mean to say
is that even though I love her, when we aren't talking time goes in a reverse way.
the days feel like months, the weeks years.
I've tried to remain close with several other people I call my peers
but even thay can't compare to the soft spot in my heart.
we were closer once, but it seems like we're falling apart

I know she's older, and thus more responsibilities
but I'd give anything just to have her close to me
I hate having to live still just off of random memories
Writing stories, kissing, smiling,  making love
Letting our passion be known to the stars above
I try my best to be understanding
you know "I'll be there for you baby, no need for planning"
If my heart was the lunar Lander than she's the girl manning
But come on girl, show me some sign of life
please, please babe, because I'd hate for our love to die tonight

I've been ******
Not by a girl
Not by lust
But by love itself
There isn't a manual so you can't seek any help
From getting shot down after I plucked up the courage to ask
To getting my heart broken and crying tears from my eyes to my ***
I mean, I've had the good the bad and the ugly,
And I have someone now who genuinely loves me
But part of me is expecting to get hurt again
And going back to where I was before
Lost, without a friend 
I mean needs as well ******* hell I swear love is the strangest thing to have to figure out
I want this to work, I don't wanna get hurt and yet I wanna let her know what my feelings are I never wanna become an  insensitive ****...

**** it .

It was another one of those nights
I came home, I missed you. i was lonely
I got In and you weren't home
Geez I'm Oh so *****

I made dinner and walked into the room
I dropped down on the bed
I looked over and read a note
nestled sweetly beside my head

I opened it up
and this is what it said
"Hey lover, I'm hiding from you
come find me use your head ;)"

Task in mind
I took off my shoes
Your little game driving out
all of my blues.

I tried the garage, not a sign of you to be found
I tried the kitchen and attic.
nope your still not around,

I searched in the bathrooms and found a clue
it was another note
"You're getting warmer lover, I'm closer than you think was what she wrote

Intrigued, I went to the room my journey began in,
I walked to the bedroom door and you said
"Come in"

I opened the door slowly n poked my head inside
I saw you wearing that lingerie we picked out
I grew hard at the sight

Calling me over
with those soft blue eyes
you already knew you had me mesmerized.

As you pulled on my necktie I heard you say
I know you had it rough, I'm gonna **** you all better today ;)

Let's take a look at the band
it's the ladies that  they're after
but I'll bet you didn't know
that guitarists finger faster.

Sure the singer's good with the tongue
and the drummer has rhythm mastered
the bass player always slaps the g string
but guitarists finger faster

My Girlfriend and I laid together
on her soft warm bed
little did we know what blazing passion
soon laid ahead

She said "Babe can you play me something? I had a very bad day
I kissed her cheek and with a voice so Meek I said lovingly "Okay".

I walked across the room
picked up my six string acoustic
I sat on the bed and played Stand By me, because I knew my girlfriend knew this.

She said "Babe, I wanna hear something exciting"
As I slowly came to a stop.
I picked it up again, and played one of my favorites, miserlou, by the king of surf rock.

As I played I looked at my lady
sitting across from me on the bed
she was grinning from ear to ear
and her thighs were sensually spread.

I laughed softly and stopped playing
and put my six string down
I got on top her warm body and said
looks like your my instrument now

I kissed her warm sweet lips
and looked into those come hither eyes
I slowly bit on her neck sliding
my hand between her thighs

I kissed her again, growling softly
As I ran my fingers between her hips
I slid my finger up and down
slowly upon her c/it

She said "Baby make me scream I want you to be my master
I kissed her once again and said
"Guitarists Finger faster"

With that etched onto her brain
I slid my fingers inside
slowly, but firmly I wanted her
to enjoy the ride

I started to let my hand pick up speed
Middle and ring don't fail me now
I blocked out all sound but I could tell
my hand should take a bow

I slid my fingers back outside
and put them to her lips
I licked them too and said
"Hmm your pxssy seems like a tasty dish"

We've been texting and calling for six months
and now it's reached its culmination
when you surprised me one day
you're coming here for vacation

I ran out to the store immediately
bought condoms, **** n toys
I also warned the neighbors
because we were gonna Make lots of noise,

I met you at the airport
you're even more beautiful in person
we talked on the way to my apartment
you wouldn't forget this I'd be certain

when we finally arrived you saw I lit some candles and laid some flowers on my bed
we kissed caught up with the moment
and lust flowing through our heads

I laid down below you because you wanted to be in charge
we kissed again while between your legs
I got ever so hard

You slid my shaft out of its pocket
and bounced on me without hesitation
As we got caught up in all the passion
you screamed MY GOD WHAT A VACATION!

Lately I've been crying internally externally I'd seem weak even though I'm already sensitive and rather meek but I've been lonely ****** can Ikik really blame me I found love that I no longer seek but we haven't talked recently I mean we don't have beef but it'd be nice if we spent a bit more time together like wu tang getting cream I mean I hate sounding clingy but I miss my lady can you blame me she's amazing entrancing like a hypnotist I swear we're into ***** **** but we've not been talking lately ugh I hate her job I know she has to work but she's my lantern in life's bog but anyway enough about my relationship issues now onto my constant sadness I hate parts of what I've become it's like I honestly thought I'd be much different from what I am I thought I'd be able to do much better socially and emotionally but I'm one depressing ******* I swear dating sometimes leaves my heart plastered on the wall in my room like it was another enemy in doom with gloom and staying almost exclusively in my room
okay I'm done now I've gotten more of these sick emotions off my chest and into the ocean that is the internet

I could take all the sickness from my heart and write it to my evil twin in a message and she wouldn't judge me no matter how late I send it
I can be the most depressed or depressing or cry my eyes into a stupor And I'll still get a response saying "I believe in you you're super."
Lord knows I've been a diary or a journal to some of my friends
now I have one of my own I can talk to like I was writing with my pen
So Misty, thank you honestly for putting up with my crazy self
I probably wouldn't have woken up today if it wasn't for your help
you've been more to me than a book on a shelf
You've been a friend, mentor, and a mechanic to my damaged self,
Been more consistent and reliable than the police when I needed help

:)

Not even my own pen my best friend could write me out of the pit I'm in
I'm like a sail without a healthy supply of wind
Within my head all that's there is dread
it's like now all of my heart is dead
I hate what I've become
I hate myself, once again from society I want to shun
I keep regretting not clipping myself with that loaded gun
It's like they said there's nothing really new under the sun

Not even my own heart can stop me from being like a cheap cell phone and falling apart
it's like every time I try I lose the motivation to start
I hate killing vibes but I had to get all of this of my twisted mind
they say the worst tears to fall are the tears of a clown
in that case all the laughs you see on my face tend to be followed by the most empty frown
All I've ever tried... something or someone knocks me down
Why should u even care about me I'm only another burden dead weight for the slaughter like a sheep without wool I've no value like ****** I'm just going to slow you down
don't forget me.... I'm not sure where I can go now

Chills running up and down my spine
it seems I feel this all the time
my sickness and my nerves so delicately intertwined
It's like all my receptors are drunken with wine
They say you'll learn to live with this over time
they say there are groups and support hotlines
But picture living, knowing that your most precious *****, the mind
could very well be the cause of you dying
Imagine living knowing you could be on borrowed time
Wanting to the live to the fullest,
but dying quicker than a mullet.
With no air rising from your gullet
"who will take care of my mom,
who will watch my nieces and nephews grow up?
Who will be there for my girlfriend and dad?
aren't you glad...
yes I am glad that I've lived and fought as long as I have
still, you can't help but consider what's at the end of life's path

God Only knows
what I'd do without my rose
The light of my day
With her I'll stay

I love her
the stars are above her
I don't know what I did before
but this girl I adore

I know I'm getting redundant
but fate has provided me a new subject
to write about think about,
worry about and pray about

I know she's going through her trials and I hate when she gets sad
I told her I'll be her crying shoulder
because she's the best thing I've ever had
I love that I can call her my own
I'm giddy like a flower who's seed has been sown

They say love makes us do crazy things
but God Only knows what to us life will bring

When I say I love you just know that I mean it
My heart became a coupon that you redeemed its crazy how I've gone all the way over the cheesy moon for you
I knew better exsisted, I didn't know it'd be you.

When I say I'm not giving up I will not rest I'm not gonna let my first real love in sometime go I guess you're stuck with me like I am with you
I go so crazy without I don't know what to do

When I say your beautiful it's like I'm describing a work of art
Your body drunkens my eyes while you cast a spell on my heart
I hope and pray that we never part
I met the woman of my dreams
and over I don't wanna start

The windy city we take no pity on fools who come through and act high n mighty like a committee if you with me shout once now twice and let me tell you why my city is so nice we don't bite we invite and write our problems on this page a city full of wizards and I'm the level 60 mage Our bulls are red with rage 6 championships always rattling the cage Michigan avenue where the clothes are so nice and the ice is tight catch the loop roll around all day and night despite the fights on the south and west sides that's right your hood here is by geographical methods not epileptic or mathematics accept it we're a new breed a strange sensation the toughest in the middle of the nation as the seasons change we only get stronger call dibs on the parking spot with a lawn chair don't despair we all no you don't wanna leave
welcome to Chicago, my city!

What most people don't realize
is that inspiration lives in front of your eyes
pain is often it's favorite disguise
but it also takes other forms to hide
love, hatred, lust and beauty
and we as poets must fulfill our duty
to catch inspiration in all of its forms
and pen it down with ink, so our voices can't be ignored.

It's like when I finally lay down
in my nice warm bed
ready to call it an evening
and spend the next eight hours hallucinating
I keep imagining you beside me warm and happy
maybe that will make some of my days less ******
I wish so sincerely that I could hold you so dearly
Kiss your cheeks and tell you I love you as you awake
cuddle you so closely and hold you tight
because your a treasure I don't want anybody to take

(if you caught the reference in the title you get bonus points)