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Feb 2015 · 637
Honesty Hour
Love Feb 2015
To be honest :
I'm lying through my teeth
I'm choking on my spit
I'm drowning in my words
And I'm about to slip
"Like an avalanche coming down the mountain"
Feb 2015 · 528
Anonymous
Love Feb 2015
I have a dream to be anonymous
like the great women throughout times
the ones who were philosophers and
the greatest people who ever were
signed anonymous
because nobody cares what a woman has to say.
-Anonymous
Feb 2015 · 618
Toad
Love Feb 2015
Do you ever get the feeling while
you're riding down the road
To fly open the door like a child
To be smashed like a toad?
Maybe its just the voice yelling jump.
Feb 2015 · 599
Sixteen
Love Feb 2015
When you're sixteen you have the illusion that your invincible, that life never ends and you cant be touched, a weak since of morality. But the fact is, everyone's being is riding on a pulse. Death is inconsiderate of age, no matter if he was only sixteen and the other only eighteen.

I hope you're up there playing football with the pros, you used to tell me that was your dream,
before you passed...at only sixteen.
Feb 2015 · 1.0k
Vision
Love Feb 2015
I cant see to write. My tears have blurred my vision and the paper is soaked.
Feb 2015 · 395
Fuck You
Love Feb 2015
I see a pattern of you choosing him over me time and time again and yet its always me you come running to with tears streaming down your face.
I feel betrayed.
Jan 2015 · 687
The Night I Kissed
Love Jan 2015
The night I kissed you for the first time you shoved my lips to yours like I was a drop of water and you were burning in hell, which is where I can imagine later you shall be. You were forceful, driven by your **** with all the blood in your bottom head instead of where it should be, your brain. Sometimes I wonder if you ever wonder what life would be like if that night wouldn't have happened. If you ever contemplate where you would be now if you would have listened to the words from my mouth repeat over and over that night you first kissed, "NO". I wonder if you ever think about the first time you kissed, the first time you went farther than you should have, the time you went past my boundries when my words of "no", my cries and screams, kicking and punching didnt seem to sink in that I wasnt enjoying myself and that I DIDN'T want to do THAT. Or I wonder if you sit there and contemplate the other girls, the ones who sit here just like me, perhaps writing poems about the guy who went too far when they were just a young a girl, the ones who took years before they would finally admit what happened, the ones who were in denial, the ones who blamed themselves forever thinking they were "asking for it". I wonder if you sit in your cell and think about the first night you kissed, us.
Jan 2015 · 699
Another Drink
Love Jan 2015
You picked up the bottle again because of me.
You cut again because of me.
You found love, no...lust, only a lover in all the wrong places because of me.
I ran away because of you.
I was scared to face life because of you.
I was, no...am blaming you but only because of my own stupidity and love for you.
He picked up a blade again because of me because I picked up a blade again because of you picking up the blade again.
Let's all throw the blades to the ground.
Shatter the liquor bottles.
Let our tears flow and talk...
And maybe we'll have a little less blood around here
And little more understanding.
If not you might as well keep the blade and down another shot.
****.
Jan 2015 · 498
Title: Untitled
Love Jan 2015
You gave your heart and soul to me
You fought for me
You know me better than anyone else
And yet I still turned away.

He stood there waiting with nothing but an I love you and off I went...

Hurting you worse than I ever have before.
I'm a horrible person. I've hurt her way too many times, love shouldn't hurt this much.
Jan 2015 · 481
Pattern of Death
Love Jan 2015
Enough is enough
I've been around the block one too many times
I shouldn't have came back this time
But for some reason
Here I stand
I'd **** myself
But I'd just come back all over again
I have a pattern of death
Dying at 18
A girl of 17 shouldn't fell older than the woman of 68 sitting beside of her
How many times do I have to come back
Why this time thrown in a batch of strangers
I screamed for 3 months after I was born because I knew this was wrong
In a loop of my own hell.
I turn 18 in 10 months.
Jan 2015 · 649
Angel
Love Jan 2015
There lies a sixteen year old ******* the floor
The life slowly fading from her cheeks
Her chest no longer rising and falling in a sine.
Her mother walks in only to find her daughter took the oath of self destruction.
The screams of pure terror signal her husband who approaches the scene with no words.
Trying to assess the chaos around him, he spots a small note sitting on the corner of her bed.
With shaking hands he picks it up and begins to read the last words of his daughter on the blood stained paper.
"To Mom and Dad: I love you both dearly but I couldn't stay. I couldn't stand it any longer. The inside now matches the out. I was already gone, dead inside. I hate for you to see me like this. Just know that I'm happier now. I'm at peace, resting in peace. Please don't cry, please don't be sad. I look forward to the day in which I see your smiling faces and you once again see mine. I'll see you up in paradise. I love you. All 3 of you... I'm sorry."
Her father drops the note as his legs fall out from under him
Waves of horror flood his mind follows by shock sinking his emotions
Confusion followd by tears overwealmed him.
He internally demanded to know where he had went wrong instantly blaming himself.
And when he lost his little girl.
She was his whole world, the center of his universe.
But now his world was gone, his bright and shining star collapsed on itself.
It was still there but only physically.
Pale and gray. The only color being the red oozing from slits that covered its arms and legs.
His universe had been destroyed, seemingly strong but as fragile as glass
It shattered into a million pieces
No wishing or praying could ever put theose pieces back together.
In a hopeless despair he sat with his wife clutched in his arms and they cried an endless waterfall of tears.
There's more to come.
Jan 2015 · 613
Going To Hell
Love Jan 2015
We joke that with the way we live
We're going to hell
But it's not joke
It scares me to death
And I can see it in your eyes
You're scared too
We're all going to hell in the end anyways.
Jan 2015 · 571
Jitters
Love Jan 2015
Before the exams....
Idreline and stress!!
Jan 2015 · 1.1k
Galaxy
Love Jan 2015
I love you to the moon and back, to the ends of the Galaxy, to the tops of the universe and no star can stand in my way.
Jan 2015 · 805
Gold
Love Jan 2015
I fell in love with the little things you do
Like when you whisper "I love you"
It sends shivers through my soul
And now my heart shines like gold.
I'm in love with the boy ❤️
I think Im starting to find my inspiration again. Happy 2015.
Jan 2015 · 400
White Room
Love Jan 2015
If I could draw a picture to describe Heaven,
Then I would but I can't and maybe that's Gods will,
The grace of beyond shouldn't be bestowed upon all eyes,
But with the preview I saw with my departed loved ones,
In that tiny white room
With my grandfather in the corner,
Observing...
Curious for someone who is yet to be departed.
Dec 2014 · 420
Too pretty?
Love Dec 2014
Everyone says I'm too pretty for him.
I don't care, since when have looks ever mattered to me? And he's not even ugly so take your opinion and shove it up your ***.
Thanks.
Not a poem just my rant of the night.
Dec 2014 · 363
Farewell
Love Dec 2014
I write my poems out of despair and now that I am happy, my inspiration has vanished. No matter how poetical I may be.
This may be the end of my hello poetry for a while. I love you guys. I'll still check in so don't worry but...bye guys.
Dec 2014 · 1.8k
Beautiful Nightmares
Love Dec 2014
I have no more inspiration.
A forced line...
Trying to describe my love for you...I come to a blank.
And that's when you know a poet it truly in love. They take your words away as well as your breath. You love them unconditionally to the point you cant romanticize it down on paper anymore because the magic you feel and see when you're with them cant be described.
The words you force for them are sub-par and inadequate.
The poems are an unwritten scripture to the one you worship in the bedroom.
Wet dreams and beautiful nightmares.
Dec 2014 · 891
Hacky Sack
Love Dec 2014
I grabbed death by the wrist and fought with him until the bitter end
And here I stand with Hell buzzing aimlessly by me
Playing hacky sack with Satan.
Dec 2014 · 15.1k
How To Love A Poet
Love Dec 2014
how does one love a poet?
between the lines of their spoken words
and their haiku's.
a jumbled nonsense to an untrained ear
but a masterpiece
to the ones who take your poems
the ones they've studied
and they dissected
because they find them*  almost
as beautiful
as the way your soul shines
when you coin a poem
about the one who
coins their poems
about you.


*the delicate intertwining process of loving a poet.
I'm in love with you and all your little things.
Dec 2014 · 2.8k
Fear (10w)
Love Dec 2014
The fear of the mic and the lights, broke me.
Im still in panics from Tuesday night.
Dec 2014 · 480
Lost Cause
Love Dec 2014
The moment comes when you lose all hope
You stop wishing for that time machine
You stop praying every night for some kind of miracle
But you never stop dreaming
Of how it felt
To have her in your arms
But the moment has come to where I've lost all hope.
Nov 2014 · 1.7k
Who You Are To Me
Love Nov 2014
You are the bags under my eyes
The bruises on my arms
And the cuts on my leg.

You are hour 50 of sleepless torture
8 cups of coffee a day
And another regretted bite.

You are the "I'm fine"
The little fibs that leave my lips
As part of my daily routine.

You are the tornado of thoughts
The flood of blood
And my beautiful nightmare.

This is who you are to me.
Nov 2014 · 495
The Forgotten
Love Nov 2014
My birthday passed again
to you as if it were just another day.
An estranged lover forgotten.
I don't know how to feel about her or what I'm really feeling...
Nov 2014 · 353
Door To The Soul
Love Nov 2014
People say that the window to the soul is through the eyes, but the door to the soul is through the words.
I was asked why I love poetry.
Nov 2014 · 660
Cigarette
Love Nov 2014
Pass me a cigarette
I'd like to let you leave my mind
Along with all the regret
And memories of you
That make my heart fret
To ever love again.
So darlin, pass me a cigarette.
Nov 2014 · 10.7k
Juliet
Love Nov 2014
If I haven't posted in a while don't think of me as gone. I remain here waiting for my inspiration to hit me in the form of a freight train. And if my inspiration never comes; dear Juliet, I still love you.
Nov 2014 · 5.2k
Liking (20w)
Love Nov 2014
I say I've moved on
And yet I find myself still liking
Every new status
Every new picture.
How pathetic.
I really need to move on but I can't when she took my heart and ran away.
Nov 2014 · 2.0k
Wished Kiss (20w)
Love Nov 2014
And in that moment I wished for nothing more
Than my lips on yours
And you didnt have a clue.
Love Nov 2014
I'm in love with you
And its hell.
You've set me free
And yet the chains we locked so long ago,
Are dragging me over the coals.
Nov 2014 · 555
Waterproof
Love Nov 2014
I'm waterproof
Standing under His waterfall.
Nov 2014 · 1.7k
Guilty By Association
Love Nov 2014
"Those kids are a bad influence on you,
They'll only drag you down."
That may be true,
But I don't have much of an option in this town.

"You're getting a bad rep: people are saying you're a *****,
You stay with those kids you're gonna burn in hell."
What makes you so sure?
Do you have my life put together better than I do in a perfect little nut shell?

Why must you be so quick to judge,
My friends, and me guilty by association,
When we are only but a nudge,
Away from self annihilation.

The facts are the facts,
And the truth is the truth,
But the fact is I can give then something they lack,
Love and hope without the ruth...
Less...ness...

**** it. Yall will never understand.
Consider me guilty by association.
Nov 2014 · 1000
Christian (20w)
Love Nov 2014
It's hard to be a loyal Christian
When you find comfort in HER arms
And judgment on the church pews.
Nov 2014 · 649
What did you do to me?
Love Nov 2014
Why would I expect anything different this time around,
From the girl who drove my heart into the ground,
And left my sanity nowhere to be found,
With my mind ******* and bound
To the memory of the sound
Of the way her heart pounds.
But how many times have I hurt her?
Nov 2014 · 446
Little Girl (10w)
Love Nov 2014
She's a pretty little girl.
Not a good little girl.
Nov 2014 · 467
Depression in Hell
Love Nov 2014
What evil sin did I commit
To deserve this hell?

If I **** myself tonight
Maybe no one would notice
Everyone who cares
Is either gone or dead
And let's face it
I'm living in hells subbasement
But I can't
And resistance comes with the price
Of my blood and alcohol
As if my mind wasn't dark enough.

We resent pain
And yet we inflict ourselves with it
The pain we can cause ourselves over rides the pain that's been given to us on a silver platter.
We want the pain to end
But we always want to hurt more.

I feel like my blood has been replaced
With alcohol
my thoughts, torment
Being tortured by
Demons
That only I can see.

This deadbeat just wants peace
With the sound of a flat line.

Which way to go
The pills calling my name
A knife
A gun
A rope and a chair
Or slowly with one drop at a time
With poison
That took the name of liquid courage.

I wonder why they called her ****.
Meant to be a song.
Oct 2014 · 593
Sins (10w)
Love Oct 2014
What evil sin did I commit
To deserve this Hell?
Oct 2014 · 303
Why (10w)
Love Oct 2014
Why am I still here?
Why am I still breathing?
Oct 2014 · 909
Luve's
Love Oct 2014
And the conductor said:
Imagine as you sing these words
"Oh my luve's like a red red rose"
That your love is here and youre singing it to them
And just like that there she was
Standing on stage
As if she was actually there
I could feel her.
I wanted to feel her.
So caught up in the beauty of my girl
Who was momentarily intangible
I forgot to sing.
Oct 2014 · 487
Ribbon (20w)
Love Oct 2014
Love is like a ribbon.
In order to make a bow you have to have the other side there too.
Oct 2014 · 676
Fucking (20w)
Love Oct 2014
At least you get to ******* see her.
You take her love for ******* granted.
While I'm being ******* ignored.
Oct 2014 · 400
Aching
Love Oct 2014
The pains within my chest
Are nothing but the physical representation
Of my broken
Aching heart.
Oct 2014 · 1.1k
Strong
Love Oct 2014
Strong in the way that we use it
Simply means that we are broken
And not yet destroyed.
Oct 2014 · 506
Moo
Love Oct 2014
Moo
Moo that's you.
Thank you hailey.
Oct 2014 · 360
What Poetry Is To Me
Love Oct 2014
Some might say that poetry is a beauty
An artistic masterpiece
Crafted by a person with magic
Flowing from their fingertips
Others might say that poetry is the sky
Dark at times
But always beautiful with something new each day
And each cloud having its own story to tell.
To me, poetry is my soul.
It's the journal
Of my journey
Called life
It's my outlet
My way of expressing words
Onto paper
Rather than from my mouth
In the most elegant and graceful
Way possible.
I am not a poet.
I am poetry.
Oct 2014 · 630
Paint
Love Oct 2014
Another coat of paint won't rid theses walls of all the sin they've seen.
Oct 2014 · 4.3k
Ignored
Love Oct 2014
You never see me
And when you do
You ignore me
And then you whine and complain
Ask why I want to leave.
Maybe I don't favor being ignored.
Oct 2014 · 490
Max
Love Oct 2014
Max
Dear Max,
I know I should have wrote this letter to you a long time ago, right after the accident. I'm sorry that I couldnt. I tried once and after I wrote dear Max I broke down and went into a panic attack. I miss you so much and I haven't went a day without thinking about you. Everytime I do think about you sorrow and regret flood my mind. You used to be my bestfriend. Everyday I would come home with the "magical adventures of Max and Mo" or at least that's what my mom called them. You were an amazing person and you always made my day better. I remember you telling me stories of how you were gonna go to the NFL and be the greatest football player there ever was. Now you'll never get the chance...I hope you're up there playing football with Jesus. I also remember on the last day of 8th grade you nearly tackled Tyler because you wanted to get to me before he did so you could sign my binder. I remember being over at Faiths and we would talk about you for hours. She had the biggest crush on you. Every single word we had to say about you was positive as could be. I never told you or Faith that u had just as big of a crush on you. I remember the day you asked Faith to the 8th grade prom. She was so excited that she could have jumped out of her own skin. I secretly was jealous but I never let a drop of that jealousy show to either of you. Then her mom and grandma found out you wanted to take her to prom. They said no. That they weren't gonna let their white daughter go to prom with some black kid, that it would make her look like a ****. I was secretly thrilled that yall weren't going together but I knew it broke her heart. After 8th grade I left school and you were one of the many people I casted out of my life as if they were deamons. When I came back to school in 10th grade you were one of the ones I longed to reconnect with, but I didnt. You had your group and I had mine and they mix as well as oil and water do. I remember one day in the hall you smiled at me and said hey. I looked down and and ignored you because I figured I had to stay to my group. Why did I have to be such a *****? You did that a few times and I never acknowledged your existence...funny now that your existence is gone I'm acknowledging it more than ever. I wanted to say hey. I wanted to reconnect with you but I didn't. I never took up the motivation to apologize for being a ***** and say hey to the boy I used to call my bestfriend. I saw the news of your death on facebook along with another boys named Brad. I prayed it was some sort of sick joke. It's been a little over 2 months since that day and I just now brought up the strength within me to write this letter. I heard of what you did for my new bestfriend mikhala that one day at a football game. Thank you for saving her then because if not for that girl I wouldn't have lived to see your death. I love you max and I miss you more than you could ever believe. Thank you max. I'm sorry. I'll see you up in Heaven one day.
I wrote this on June 2nd and then tucked it away behind my dresser drawer. I've been moving recenty and found it and it brought me to tears. I felt it needed to be posted. Please don't comment or anything, like it of you want but other than that is just like for this letter to be archived here.
Oct 2014 · 353
Aching Mind
Love Oct 2014
With you by my side,
the world is calm,
and for once,
no thoughts of death.
You put my aching mind to rest.
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