Please
Rip this symphony of strategic words,
Curses that Echo and billow,
Like a cloud of smoke from your mouth,
As you inhale over and over again,
Your cigarette dictionary,
Yet am I the one who feels the burn,
Please rip them from your throat,
I can't,
I can't do this much longer,

Whiskey is liquid strength,
When the rage kicks in,
You can take down the toughest guy,
In the bar,
Mind games,
Liquid Strength,
Another shot,
And maybe,
You could take over the world.

I believe, God put his view on the world in new borns eyes, and when you stare down into the kaleidoscope wonders, you see the natural beauty of what this all use to be. And when I look down at you Cooper, know I'm standing in the Garden of Eden, with tears rolling down my cheeks, splashing against a phone screen, preventing me from watching you blink. Aunty loves  you Cooper.

THIS.  IS.  LOVE.  

yell it until the vein on the side of your temple pulsates, pulsates in my 21 year old mind

yell it until the bruises are gifts

yell it until the anxiety is your inspiration

I miss forehead kisses

He said I'm never going to be anything.
He told me I'm a failure.
I looked back, and said a failure is something.

Prince Eric goes to school,
He has curly hair,
Buys cheap cars & sells them,
He's rich.

You're not trying to,
You wired maniac,
I was trying,

Yall are anoyying

I thought of you, when you thought of me.
I deleted all our memories off my phone.
The ones where we're smiling,
As if in a few short months,
We didn't know we'd be nothing to each other,
You gave me a quiet hey,
I gave you a simple nod,
We asked about each other's lifes,
I found that quite odd,
Because it feels like just yesterday,
You knew me better than myself,
But you told me about your new job,
1500 a night,
Taking your clothes off for girls,
As if that was right,
I asked jokingly if you charged extra for the guys,
You nodded without missing a beat,
I felt chocked up inside,
I just grinned and said I remember when I got all of that for free.

I leaned my aching head into the bottle,
Drinking it all in,
Your tongue thirsts for me,
You can't get my name off your lips,
Your hands wrap around my hips,
Telling strangers how beautiful I am,
I'll shove you away,
*******
At
His
Finest

Scare crows sit at the fence of all my thoughts, picking out the dead things.

Pick up truck,
Pick me up,
Two bestfriends,
And a reckless driver,
2010 hits,
Would be enough to drive away the pain,
90 miles per hour,
Race death,
I looked at her,
And she looked at me,
I screamed when I die,
This is how I want it to be.

POETS ALWAYS TALK ABOUT THE SEA AND THE SAND LIKE ITS ROMANTIC. THEY SAY THE TIDE KISSES THE BEACH EVERY TIME IT COMES HOME. BUT TO ME IT LOOKS A WHOLE LOT LIKE ABUSE. THE WAY THE SEA REAMS UP TO COME CRASHING DOWN ON WORTHLESS SPECS OF SAND THAT USE TO BE SHELLS AND LIVING CREATURES. NOW BATTERED TO THE POINT OF NOTHINGNESS. SO NO TO ME IT REMINDS ME OF NOTHING ROMANTIC. IT REMINDS ME OF 3AM SHAKING AWAKE COVERED IN SWEAT FROM THE NIGHTMARES OF YOU DAD. YOURE THE OCEAN AND I AM THE SAND. FOREVER LONGING TO HOLD YOUR HAND. WATCHING AS YOU LEAVE OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN COMING BACK TEN TIMES ANGIER. NOT SATIFIED UNTIL I DROWND.

If there was a lot more moisture around us, this leaf would be well rounded.

A rip in the door, a tip in the drawr,
Philosophy or trigonometry,
Epic failure,
Filled with pens & paper clips,
Minds to the matter,
Key opening frogs,
Toads totaling mirrors,  
Mane of Moroccan Curls,
Sashaying  across broad shoulders,
And smooth hips,
Laying on clouds,
Because you can't afford to breath,
On the ground,
Tree topped eye lined,
Eye lids,
Shut.

You're not thinking what I think you're thinking are you now?

I don't really do this, but I cannot sleep, I really need someone to talk to? Comment and I'll message you.

I don't want to be lonely. But I like being alone.

i wrote a letter on a napkin,
Left it in the break room for all to see,
Butterflys & dragon wings,
Dented brains,
Zombies are lame,
Apostolic Atmosphere,
Coke pancakes,
Canadian convos,
Metaphorically you're a drawr in reverse,
I'm not ****** just lonely.

Like father, like son, good thing I'm a girl.

uneven, steps,
Smack against the unpaved road way,
Leaving the screaming house,
On that empty hill behind,
I sit down beside the dead deer,
We have so much incommon,
No family or friends,
We were left for dead,
We'll never open our eyes again and see the world,
As beautiful,
My finger tips carress the roughly fine fur against his jaw,
My lips meet his forehead,
A gentle goodnight kiss,
Dandelions & Black-eyed Susans,
I wrap and tangle evenly,
Madly, through his antlers,
My cheeks still flush with the escape,
My eye still bruised,
Wasn't a quick enough get away,
My emotions vast and empty,
Like this graveyard of a fields,
My hands grab the last flower,
Plucking it from the earth,
From its home,
No one was there to speak up for it,
Just like me,
I fell in love with nature,
I realized how cruel it really can be,
Just like them,
Just like me,
Just like you,

I've held the hands of the homeless,
I've hugged the daughters of the motherless,
I've spoken to the deaf,
I could never be satisfied with a nine to five,
This is my life

Aware enough to cheer the game on,
As they strike out,
Your son sits behind you,
Keys clicking,
To fill the void of a good foot ball throw,
Hallow hello hell,
Fatherless fathers fell.
To sleep because the drugs,
Are easier than the kids,
He made.

I cursed every tear that dripped from my blue forsaken eyes, rolled down my cheeks, to rest at my lips, the ones that never got to call you dad.

Parking lot hangs,
Wishing you had something to eat in that purse,
Of yours,
Counting Stars & freckles,
White girl flesh,
In the blood,
Backwards trucker hats,
I straightened my hair today,
& forgot who I was...

Don't tell me I'm pretty, I did not choose the way my features aligned themselves, or the texture of my hair, or the color on my skin. Tell me I have a beautiful mind, tell me you love my honesty. Tell me the way the rain makes me happy, makes you happy, compliment me on things I've worked on, on things I've developed. Don't tell me I'm ugly, I did not choose the way my features aligned themselves, or the texture of my hair, or the color on my skin. Tell me the way I enter a room like a hurricane infuriates you, tell me my tactlessness hurts you and everyone around me, tell me my inappropriate mouth is offensive and crude. Critique me on things I can change, make me a better person. I don't care how you think I look.

I hope you sleep well, beneath the ocean swell, against the cool rocks. Beside the crevices of your mind. I love you.goodnight

Proactive hip gestures. To lady lusters. Do you know what it's like to have someone shove their hand down your pants involuntarily. Sip your free breeze bundles of Sundays. I'll float on.

P L O P P E D, PLOPPED YOUR FAT *** ON THE COUCH TO READ A BOOK THERES NO PROOF THAT YOU DIDNT HEAR ME. ITS YOUR FAULT ITS YOUR FAULT ITS YOUR FAULT YOURE SO STUPID YOU HAVE NO COMMON SENSE YOU FAT LAZY COW!

Lettuce forgive those, who do wrong,
Because I don't carrot all anymore.

Make something of yourself son,
Cause you know daddy ain't gonna.
I know you aren't bitter boy
Wipe them tears from your cheeks
Be the man your poppa shoulda been
Sonny don't cry yourself to sleep
But mom, walk in my shoes

I've got a dozen words in my head,
They sound like poetry,
But a little dead,
Like ghost of words,
I would've said,
But Ive changed.
It's sounds like poetry,
Cause it's both a blessing,
And a curse,
He screamed,
To feel everything so,
Deeply,
It wasn't he,
Was me,
I said that,
Ghost words,
Ghost words,
But baby,
They're beautifuly,
Arranged,
Like the flowers at a new grave,
Cause no body comes back,
No body visits,
These ghost words,
Yeah poetry,
Dead poets society,

I'm not one to drink much, but I could hold a beer or two. Three perhaps, possibly four. But I'd much rather, sit under the bar stool, counting all the feet that propel inside the door. Hands stuck in sticky ale, a spilled brew. Wait for my face to grow into my mind. Finally match. It's all about perspective.

If they let you into heaven, I'd rather go to hell

Perpetuate flyers, flowers minding their own business. The armed farmer grows his crops, unnaturally, factory wise. Genetically mutated agriculturally roasted. Mitosis, weeds stem cells. Winding blows back & forth. Back peddle into hardwood flooring. The view is great up here, giant machinery pretending to be trees. Hack the life out of bees, pollinated keepers keep secrets cause they're killers. These two eyes, see through me back to you.

I will not be satisfied until, your paw printed blankets, are the only thing between us...

Binge eating, only to feel disgusted afterwards.
Putting on makeup, just to smear it off, it doesn't help the ugly go away.
Stop eating for a month, so you can see your ribs again, not small enough anyway.
Spend 200 plus on lingerie, to make today better, it doesn't.

My shadow is beautiful,
She dances and twirls,
Does piewriates down the halls,
I walk with her talk with her,
She mocks me,
Cause she knows I'll never do what she can,
The way she bends,
Almost breaks,
Stands back up,
The tips of her toes pointed straight,
Ballerina, Ballerinia,
Overweight,
You can't protisapate,
Ballerinia, Ballernia,
Stay home,

She said, I'll never love a man...
Who ridicules my weight,
I said then don't,
Who bothers me about my posture,
Being straight...scoliosis,
I said then don't,
Who says I can't wear this or that,
I said then don't,
Who questions my morales & beliefs,
I said then don't,
Who makes fun of the things,
That bring me relief,
I said then don't,
Who wants to have *** after the first date,
I said then don't,
She said, I'll never love a man...
I said then don't.

Uneasiness drifts in, with the subtle lack of beauty. Drift wood, late night thoughts.
Doubt, does he love me, does he love me not.
Trying to row ashore in an already sinking ship,
Already drowning, in what. A tidal wave, or true love. My brain floats away, stuck between two rocks, I keep my heart above the water. Hoping I'll be able to breath. Anyone can leave, at any given moment. There goes my leg, down the the current.

She said to me, " you're such a *** head, one minute laughing hysterically over the smallest breathes of air, then you're spewing theology like a college professor"

I wonder what's under that skin?

And when I tell you I cheated on you,
I’ll say, it feels better than feeling nothing.

I talk to God about you lately, more often then not. He's a jealous father, with overprotective ways.

I complained I'm hungry,
I'm hungry,
Stomach involunteerly crying out,
I said I'm hungry,
He said, how
He looked me up and down,
It's impossible,
The way you eat pre dinner,
Then dinner,
Then snack, then after snack,
You're not hungry,
The tears didn't have a chance to fall,
I was out of the house,
Lost in this hell we call life.

20 pounds less than last month, I guess things do work out

You wanted a butterfly
But only peeped in
On a mere caterpillar
Unsure on the process
  Of using wings
And when she did
You gazed upon her lovingly
Your butterfly lips ******* on her skin like mandarin oranges
Next spring you'll go away
To find another butterfly
In her cocoon is where she will **stay

Wash the backyard off your face,
And the two am swing sets,
Cheers to the forever long gone sandbox toys,
The treehouse we burned down in 03,
Blue fruit snacks,
When being first in line was a win,
Scraped shins & knees,
Bandsids they could fix anything,
There's no such things as love,
Just lightning bugs & undreamed of,
Worlds....

It always ends in ****, because the walls can't speak the honesty you need. Somehow you find the gratifying affection in watching other people make uncultured love in unkept sheets. We call this cycle, good enough. As our hollow hearts beat harder. Mass production of media, easily prescribed as a fault of technology. Mass media production is a man made reduction of ourselves behind glass emotions. Sickening potions, as you hit delete history. From your phones memory, but not yours kid.

Depression is like waking up sick, everyday since the last time that you could remember. You carry around the cure, in the unkempt form of your mind.

She said cry me a river,
So I bled her an ocean,
I drownd all the things I loved most,
Ship wrecked my emotions,
Lost my hope at sea,
All I needed you to be was my lighthouse,
Mom,
I'm sinking,
See THIS OCEAN ISNT MY HOME ITS SOME IMAGINITIVE PLACE I GO WHEN YOUR WORDS STEAL THE AIR FROM MY LUNGS AND THE WATER THAT USE TO BE SO REFRESHING FILLS MY THROAT AND DOESNT GO DOWN ALL YOU CARE ABOUT IS WETHER OR NOT YOUR FLOATING BUT MOM IVE BEEN TREADING THESE WATERS EVER SINCE 98