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Jun 2022 · 537
Madeysin Jun 2022
You ever picture insanity?
Barefoot wineglass catastrophe
God I just picture kicking a wineglass into someone’s face
Apr 2022 · 282
Madeysin Apr 2022
I knew he wasn’t a poet, a writer, a prophet or lover in the way he never came back.
Jan 2022 · 606
Madeysin Jan 2022
When you get the news you may be dying, chocolate doesn’t taste any sweeter.
Oct 2021 · 106
I talked
Madeysin Oct 2021
I craved leaving like the sea begged the shore to come to bed.
I craved not moving a muscle like exhaustion rattled my bones.
For once in my life I was content in the standstill.
Oct 2021 · 165
I don’t really know
Madeysin Oct 2021
And if you lay at my back it’s hard to breathe. Two spines don’t equal out eloquently.
There’s mountains between us, and craters catered to the absence of the words the wind wished you’d say.
Aug 2021 · 122
Prophet Philosophies
Madeysin Aug 2021
He said you have that talent and that baby and you wear it so beautifully. Eloquently, like none of their harsh words ever mattered, like you didn’t scrub away your finger prints wiping off the excess opinions.
Like you weren’t ever crucified for your weight and how you chose to carry it or sit it down when you got weary. Like loneliness was never a cloak you cradled with you. Like quiet was your nature and loud was your opening act. Like people weren’t diving in to receive more and leave you less. Girl, you have that talent and that baby and you wear it so beautifully.
Aug 2021 · 364
Madeysin Aug 2021
Writing is unpacking, it’s unloading the freeloaders opinions & wiping slates clean.
Writing is packing, it’s loading up the freeloaders opinions & keeping score.

A narcissistic paradise, ink, pencil, pen, choose your weapon.
Aug 2021 · 93
Madeysin Aug 2021
Mom, such a foreign word
I have one, I know one, I am one
And yet I haven’t begun to understand the meaning
Aug 2021 · 609
Madeysin Aug 2021
“A burden of joy”
A joy so heavy you have to feel it
Hold it in your arms
Cradle it to your chest
Rock it steadfast to sleep
Apr 2021 · 102
Without rhyme or reason
Madeysin Apr 2021
I don’t feel beautiful. But when he holds me I do.
Mar 2021 · 107
This is how I’ll love you
Madeysin Mar 2021
Your back a map to sleepily tell you how I love you so
Your shoulder blades always a consistent ache
My face finds the crook in your chest
Hallowed out to hold my heart steadfast
Mar 2021 · 95
Eat eat eat
Madeysin Mar 2021
I don’t often run into my collar bones
My hands are too busy tugging on the too tight knit shirt
Today I didn’t have to fight the stitching off
It hugged my knees loosely
Enough room for you, me and all the hungry ghosts between us
I don’t often run into my collar bones
Today you could drink from them
Jan 2021 · 402
Madeysin Jan 2021
When you laughed you took all the air from out of our lungs & for the first time I was glad to see you selfish.
Jan 2021 · 195
Madeysin Jan 2021
The deepest intake
The shallowest chest cavity
Held nothing for me
Nov 2020 · 153
Madeysin Nov 2020
I glued my legs together with black berry jam
The sweetest spread
Nov 2020 · 105
Letters to Dad
Madeysin Nov 2020
Did you become an alcoholic because of a girl or because of the world?
Whatever your answer is, same.
Oct 2020 · 89
Madeysin Oct 2020
Today I made love to myself with the windows open
The breeze blew my legs ajar
The wind whistled and tickled me all the way to my core
Today I made love to myself with the windows open
Mother Nature called me a *****
Sep 2020 · 57
Losing it
Madeysin Sep 2020
Pull at the seams
Knot up your dreams
Pack away the magazines

Your skin a thin sheen, stretched and smacked against your thighs

Your frame a sagging conundrum to be condemned by the click

Weight loss is a huge trick
The more you lose the less you, you are
Aug 2020 · 53
Madeysin Aug 2020
I stepped off & I stepped out
The curtain closed & I with it
Swept up into the rafters to rest
A melodramatic sarcophagus
Aug 2020 · 118
Bella Notte
Madeysin Aug 2020
Pillowed chest cavity,
Accordion to articulate the pressure in my clavicle.

A firm press to seep out the excess,
To access my insides,
To accept I’ll never be like those other girls.

To drape this weight along my neck, is too much to bare. I’d hand it off to you, but you’re not there.

Jul 2020 · 96
Madeysin Jul 2020
Living on the edge with so many stipulations, suffocating
Jul 2020 · 101
Tell tale
Madeysin Jul 2020
Nothing mattered, other than the desperation of needing each other.
Just that consummated closeness.
A craving.
Jul 2020 · 68
An if
Madeysin Jul 2020
I’ve got a hunting dog on my back, he sniffs out my sadness, he’s always on the right track.
Madeysin Jul 2020
Speechless like an undertow,
Barreling towards the sandy coffin you always expected but never wanted to admit.

Breathless like tongue tied gills,
The light ebbing from your eyes, the water is cooler inside.

Lifeless like when he tells you he doesn’t have the capacity to love you but he has fallen for another.

We’re all speechless in this undertow, barreling unexpectedly expecting to be hurt but not quite ready for that sting. I am breathless from tying my tongue with yours every night for months and never being kissed back. I am calm, I am collected, I am collecting myself from you. My life is less without you but I am more.
Jul 2020 · 66
Madeysin Jul 2020
She said I’ve got a problem with parents
And I said what about when you are one
And she said I never will
And I said you already are
Jul 2020 · 95
Madeysin Jul 2020
I wanna have enough friends that two people can carry the cake out when they sing happy birthday
Jul 2020 · 98
Madeysin Jul 2020
I’ll tuck the tears back behind my eyelids.
Keep them closed like the window on the fourth floor my mom always kept locked so I wouldn’t leap.
Jul 2020 · 97
To go box
Madeysin Jul 2020
Your face fell between my thighs, cradled, rock-a-bye, never eat more than you can handle. Always use your forks and knives.
Jul 2020 · 86
Madeysin Jul 2020
What is it
That noise you make
That soft hum so distinct
So full of distain

Jul 2020 · 84
Madeysin Jul 2020
Scorn me, scorch me, sink your suckling teeth into me. But don’t you ever ******* say you love me.
Jul 2020 · 84
One set of chopsticks
Madeysin Jul 2020
How much of me do you not need?

Because when I offered you accepted everything willingly.

You stuffed your face with frivolity.

Selfishly gulped down my heart and with it my insecurities.

When you were finished, you gave your compliments to the chef and told me you never wanted any of it.
Jul 2020 · 95
Madeysin Jul 2020
You put your head on my leg, weighing it down. But weight doesn’t make you stay. Weight doesn’t anchor you to the bay. Weight can keep you afloat, lighter than the water. Heavier than the waves. It can keep you warm during a winters storm. Safe from frigid contrasts. You put your head on my leg, weighing it down.

I cut it off and crawled away
Jul 2020 · 79
Madeysin Jul 2020
I wish your sincerity would reverberate through me, bounce back and clothe you
Jun 2020 · 88
Madeysin Jun 2020
A clean slate on my wrist. Fall asleep with the fan off, you won’t be missed.

Start again or don’t, breathe again

No, I think I wont
Jun 2020 · 55
Madeysin Jun 2020
Flightless bird with you, with him I always find the wind beneath my wings.
Jun 2020 · 38
Here for the Ride
Madeysin Jun 2020
The orange traffic cones follow me like ghosts, weaving up the highway. Trying to help me get home.

Home is a blurred side eyed view in the passenger seat.
Jun 2020 · 69
Madeysin Jun 2020
Count the stripes on your back, to equal out what your step dad thinks you lack. To make sure you never bleed out from those masses of granulation tissue. Fine lines to define your worth, girl. To feel the flames lick down your back, to wish for death, to only wake up again.

Isiah 53: 3-7 is *******
Jun 2020 · 63
Madeysin Jun 2020
And if you’re dancing again, the ghost will follow your foot steps. Clamber up to your chest cavity and dive in. Die in. Die inside. Stopped dancing again.
Jun 2020 · 82
Madeysin Jun 2020
Something spiritual how a rain coat keeps you warmer than last years winter jacket.
Jun 2020 · 48
Madeysin Jun 2020
I’m going to love the hate out of you, it’ll pool at your feet and we will kick it away.
May 2020 · 56
Madeysin May 2020
Something comforting about how the gears grinds and clicks. Like you’re in control of what happens next.
May 2020 · 66
Madeysin May 2020
Hum drum of hookups, silique symphony. A long line of history, bad timing and misery. One night stands and two night bands traveling along my hip bones. If you play me right you just might get an encore.
May 2020 · 162
Madeysin May 2020
I started writing but I stopped eating
May 2020 · 57
Madeysin May 2020
I’ll share the sunshine with you, even if it’s behind a windowpane.
May 2020 · 55
Madeysin May 2020
Are you running after life, or is the after life running after you?
May 2020 · 115
And Never Look Back
Madeysin May 2020
With every tale of a past adventure, you told me how you’re going to leave me in the future.
Apr 2020 · 166
Was it worth it
Madeysin Apr 2020
My servitude to calorie counting. Small bites and bitter ends. Weighed and tried and found guilty of a chocolate demise?
Apr 2020 · 56
Plaid Sheets
Madeysin Apr 2020
Tap out, tap in, tap into me
Holy water, maple syrup
Geyser of ecstasy
*** in me
Apr 2020 · 56
Ex ex ex
Madeysin Apr 2020
Called me doll as an endearment,
I hear it as a fear meant,
To drag me back to you
Mar 2020 · 91
Madeysin Mar 2020
The worst things last for 30 minutes
The best things last for 30 seconds
Life happens between those moments.
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