You were the first drop of rain after a seemingly endless drought.
The beginning of the end of a barren Era.

After that first drop, the crops began to take life.
The trees seemed to stand taller,
The animals, seemed calmer.

You were the start of everything new.
You were the embodiment, of everything true.

I couldn't ask a thing from you,
Your presence is enough to fulfill a lifetime.

You are my sister, this is true,
no matter what, I'm here for you.
You are my sister, and since the start,
there has been a place for you in my heart.
No matter what you're going through,
I'll back you up, in whatever you do.
We can just sit, and watch a nice view,
or laugh while we drink a brew, or two.
You are my sister, a work of art,
and I hope that we, will never part.

Its days like this when I'm on top of the world.
And yet, I always find a way to let it slip through my fingers.
Cause clenched fists, could never hold as much as open palms.

She was a child of the universe,
Wading through the tall grass
Only stopping to reach up, and touch the stars.

I asked her how the stars felt when she touched them,
She replied, "like sunshine in the winter."
I asked her how they made her feel,
Then she told me, it was far too surreal.

The gypsy queen of eighteen,
Her soul, a map of destinations.
Her actions never needing explinations.
As wild and free, as a ship at sea.
She never was, but she will always be.

Even if I'm not the one,
you'll come to, every time.
Even if I'm not the one,
who's always on your mind.
I'll be here when you need me,
whenever that may be.
I'll be here when you need me,
I will not be busy.
Even if you can not trust,
with your heart or your mind.
Even if you can not trust,
I'll teach you in due time.
You can always come to me,
I'll share my time with you.
You can always come to me,
with any of your issues.
I'll do my best to help you,
so you won't feel alone,
I'll do my best to help you,
I'll make you feel at home.

A shadow drapes itself across my naked body,
Weightless.. yet, heavy.
The shilouetted form cuts itself a share of my light.
Leaving behind a darkness.

Empty space.

Peering eyes, unseen.
I wish this were a dream.

Yes I see these memories,
But was I really there?
Body and mind both there in time,
Though soul and thoughts, were where?

The past a story written down,
The pages in a book.
Photographs on camera roll,
The ones I never took.

I present for the, me
A mess of emotion
With a head full of wonders in puzzling contortions

Subtracting and adding, feelings from thoughts
And filled with regrets of decisions unsaught
Living through life as each day passes by
While never really knowing which words are a lie

My mind brings me highs, and the lowest of lows, from wondering about things, that no one ever knows

Oh, I wish I could know
I wish I could know.

Thou shall refrain from embracing the sun,
Or even setting course, too near a star;
In fear of the heat, exhaustion, and getting burned.

Though in time we all do learn, a trip can be more than but a destination..

It can become a journey in search of love, worth or salvation,
A trip becomes a memory, those memories become a life been lived.
And what good story exists without a point
Of

...Hesitation.

I wish that your holidays, will be filled with cheer,
even if you are left, without any beer.
For as long as your loved ones are kept near,
you should be filled with joy, and left without fear.
All the Christmas carols, that you will hear,
should fill up your homes, and with that each ear.
If you will drink, I hope your mind will stay clear,
So I may wish you a sincere, and happy new year.

In order to take
Any smile with me,
I must create
A vision of what I see.

But how can I make
Using medium and mind
When I am reduced
To such small confines.

I would use red
And with it some black
But no matter the outcome
I can't get you back

Colors and canvas
Can help me create,
But I will not ever
Get to demonstrate,
That I can be better
So what is my fate?

What is life if not agony.
Have you ever truly lived,
If you haven't felt your lungs seize;
And struggled with a menial task like continuing to breathe?

How can you claim to have a life that's full
If you haven't felt the emptiness that comes from a destroyed soul?
Where can you find happiness or love
Without living for years in dispair;
This life has never been fair.

Life is seeing those you love slip away
After doing all that you can to keep their demons at bay.
Life is living with no one by your side,
Living with no true home to reside
And with no one in which to confide.

Starlight, quite bright,
Shining in the dark, tonight,
Give a light 'til darkness, fright,
And hide away, from me.

There is not a day, I don't wish to be seen
As a woman straight out of a dream.

Filling in lines, with large amounts of time.
Collapsing echoes of empty thoughts into our corners,
And living numb, like emotional hoarders.

Let us free. We wish to sing, to dance again;
To live our lives, as we did back then.
So ourselves and full of passion.
And so unique in every fashion.

I arrange these messes of letters;
Trying to express feelings and thoughts.
Twenty six letters do not suffice
To describe some states of mind.
No metaphors, or similies, could portray
The hyperbole, of self induced dismay.

My mind is open.
See what is, my brain.
It's the purest form,
of all which I contain.
Crack open my skull,
With objects blunt, or dull.
Expose my mind, than take it all.

It seems to be, so simply,
that I let all that you are, consume me.
For I indulge at the slightest touch,
and I yearn for the day,
but I'd **** for the night.
I let every trouble and worry, slip away.
Finding sweet serenity,
in a face, and mind, so eloquent.
Some days, I think I think too much.
and some days, I think I'm right.

Curtious Curiosity,
Coaxing me in,
Calling my name
Like a chivalrous hymn. 

What is to blame
For what drives me insane 
And calls me like fame
To unwind and untame. 

Breathe in and breathe out
Get rid of all your doubts
Now find what life
Is truly about. 
Smile bright, never doubt.

Its what's on the inside that matters.
But it's what's on the outside, that gets your attention.

Cravings I've had before are nothing compared to thoughts of you,
The desire of lust is nothing, compared to the motivation for a conversation.
Hit that switch and let your thoughts drown me, I can drink them all.
Flip that lever and I'll show you my endeavor, to learn all I can of who you are.
Excitement at the mere thought of a thought, of a thought.
You're in my dreams, boy.
You are my dream, boy.

Jealousy, the venomous and deceptive emotion.
The mountainous trouble, the worry gone through,
to get to this height, then see it claimed as untrue.
The force of jealousy, can overpower most minds,
it takes hold of desire, and leads thoughts askew,
until believing wrong, is the right thing to do.

Intimidatingly alluring, that is what you are.
I cannot keep my awkwardness from stirring,
As I try to be smooth whilist my thoughts are still churning.
I keep messing up the words, from my mouth that come out.

You're even more fine, than the best dwarven stout,
With an essence of strength, though you keep yourself at length.
Even without a stash of memories, of you, in my mind;
Thoughts of you still cross, I find.
This is but a simple note to entwine your mind with rhyme,
I find you sublime, and I think you're divine.

What lie in your home,
In corners, undisturbed.
Are there thoughts, feelings, of things unknown,
Or one's that may preturb?
Have you ever felt a draft blow through;
That shiver of regret.
Or is your heart hidden from outside view,
Unseen, by even you.

Saftey in shelter, in secrets kept,
I see you, tall and proud.
I also peer through veil and shroud,
Seeing loss for which you've never wept.

How can you expect, to be love adept,
Shunning all feelings which have crept.

Holding on so tight, not wanting to let this moment leave.
Like quicksand, or a Chinese finger trap.
The more you try to get or keep what you want,
the faster it will leave, and the harder it will be for you to let it go.

With each breath drawn, the distance which parts our bodies will evaporate, like dew after dawn.

And with each exhale of humid breath, the time taken slipping out of fabrics slows to a streamlined unveiling; that could entwine me until death.

A leaf rolls by, on an early august
Mourning,
With wind by its side, in a sky,
Worth adorning.

Where will wind take, this leaf to its fate.
Is this love, or is it hate?

A breeze moves this leaf,
It lifts it up high
And allows it to fly,
But only by the wind and its sky.

Without the wind the leaf would land,
And have to learn it can not fly,
Only by wind in the sky.

I enjoy hearing the words that you speak,
even if the softest ones, are never said to me.
I adore to see your smiling face,
every morning, in this same, old place.
I crave to feel, the softness of skin,
the graze of a hand, or even a limb.
*Its an endless entrapment,
and I've yet to find a way,
to escape from here, but have the feelings, stay.

I watched you fade away,
At a quicker pace
Than the bruises you left, on my body.

Missing, waiting,
Wishing, hating,
Spending all my
Time, debating.

Loving, longing,
Always, stalling,
Stand up tall,
Watch me crawling.

What is worth it,
When I can't quit.
I still love you,
But I feel like ****.

Into your life,
I can't fit,
Nor can I crawl out,
From this pit.

I write, you read,
That is all, which I need.
From you, I feed,
I'll go, where you lead.

Plant a flower,
With one seed,
Watch it grow,
Into a ****.

I can't ****,
What I have made,
Even if
It has decayed.

Perhaps I'm but a pawn,
In a much bigger game,
and the actions that I take,
are not mine, to blame.

I feel your heat, fire.
I long to get close enough to be burned.
I am your observer, you can call me yours.
But you, are not mine.
I am one with the crowd flocked around you.
All of us close enough to feel,
But I'll envy the one you consume whole.
The pyromaniac who fears nothing and walks right in, to feel your all.

I'll be dead by then.
when all hell breaks loose.
And when It does,
Ill be Free.

Searching for outlines, through a thick haze
of smoke, and shadows
of soot, and smog.

Breathing in such vile odors,
which mask the locations of lines and confines.
Too weak to be breaking down doors.
Too tall to be down on the floors.

Dusty and *****, still haven't reached thirty.
Climbing high, moving on.
Pushing on from dusk through dawn.
Still unsure why I move on.

There was once a point in my life where you couldn't keep me from writing.
When the ink would flow from my pen in an unending stream, pouring my consciousness onto paper.

I have not lost myself,
At some point though, I stopped loving myself the way I deserve.

The poison of criticisms had seeped their way into my mind and forever altered the chemistry of my brain into an acidic soil deprived of nutrients.
The winding weeds of doubt overtaken all the space, coaxing their way into every crevasse.

I struggle to pull these weeds out at their root, feeling as though I am constantly nipping at fresh buds, overwhelmed, as I cannot find the spaces beneath the surface where true problems lie.

Can I just throw out all this tainted soil  and begin anew with fresh dirt, or am I to spend a lifetime pulling at weeds trying to make room for flowers and food.

Wishing, never got anyone anywhere,
In the same way, never does waiting on luck.
But its still better than resorting to prayer,
for I've yet to see god give a ****.

I've fallen back into the abyss,
After swimming in a sea of light.

It's much darker here than I remember.

I'll drop to my knees for you;
You don't even have to ask.
Just let me do this simple task -
let me hear those shuddered gasps.

Sometimes I wonder
If it's because I have shut so much love out, in fear of hurt,
That love hasn't shown it's face to me
In years.

Oh, procrastination,
thy cruel mistress.
as devoted to the, as I may be...
You, are no good for me.

Oh, how your presence draws me,
Pulling me in, without hesitation.
like a tension, you steer me astray,
with the simple way you stay.
I just, can't get away.

The soil shifts. The mountains crack.
The boulders tumble, a predetermined track.
Nothing solid, stays forever.
All that lives, endures the weather.

The visions blur, those thoughts unheard.
The secrets tended, become lies defended.
Everything paused, envelops never.
All that dies, had once surrendered.

Does a meaning differ -
By moonlight, aside sunlight..

What invokes essence of being,
Only unveiled by ticks on a clock

For some root into eternity, and flourish through ages;
Live timelessly in a world of time,
so long as those ahead choose to look behind.