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"ummm" poems
I wonder if you've noticed, I'm becoming less appealing, Our conversations are getting very... Very, boring... And I wonder if you've noticed, That I'm becoming less appealing. You can tell me, I didn't meant to approach you, It was a decision made in a split second, And it seems like my heart's voice was louder than my brain's then: I'm being honest, My chest was about to explode, My heart was a ticking time bomb And I could only disarm it by giving it a voice, Converting its electric impulses into sound waves. But now, It's been a while since then, And, We're drifting apart... I haven't told you that I nicknamed you zebra because of that cute black and white shirt you had on... Because, I'm scared that would just trigger the slow end of our... Our?! I mean, It will make our friendship awkward. I told my friends I don't like you, But apparently you like me - But, I just have a question, After getting to know me - Ummm... Have I lost my charms, Or are you still googly-eyed over the stupid fifteen year old boy that nearly tripped over his own words as he uttered, "You're very pretty"?
0
Mar 13, 2016
Mar 13, 2016 at 2:40 PM UTC
Slowly losing interest?
I don’t get feminism. The term, that is. When they ask, "Are you a feminist?" I reply, “Sure.” They nod in bobble-head approval. “I’m also a childist and animalist” A confounded grimace glazes over “Huh?” “Of course. Aren’t YOU a childist? Aren’t YOU an animalist?” “Uh. What do you mean?” “Well, don’t you believe that children and animals should be treated with love?” “Well, naturally.” “Well. There you go. You’re a childist And animalist.” "Besides,  you would extend this love To all sentient beings, I’m assuming?” “Ummm. Yes...” “Well, then, you’re a masculinist too, Just like me!” This is about the time their cell buzzes Or their double soy frap is ready They whisk away “Oh, I’m also a worldist!” I belt out Before they exit As I resume reading Remaining clever, and Alone.
0
Feb 25, 2015
Feb 25, 2015 at 1:31 AM UTC
Feminism
sext: wrap me in the blanket that's in the back seat of your car, call her while I'm staring into space, tell her you love her out of no where sext: uuuuuuuuhhhhh......I don't want to move in with you sext: I love you but I'm moving a thousand miles away sext: I love you so I'm moving a thousand miles away sext: I'm moving a thousand miles away BECAUSE I love you sext: I want to bite off your tongue sext: really bad sext: you shouldn't have told her you love her when I was already off the ledge sext: I'll bite your lip, it'll bleed, red will pour down your mouth and your clothes and your horns will poke through and BOOM! satan sext: baby baby BABY you turn me on sext: especially when your actions completely correlate with what I was always told not to do sext: I was told not to do you, but, well....ok we were supposed to hangout at a park like this is a ******* indie movie but this cop told me that park was closed? I didn't know parks ******* close? so we met in a parking lot and you mentioned how your roommate wasn't home and la la la la LAAAAA, we ended up on your living room floor and the carpet was covered in my black lace sext: I'm wearing high heels, tall ones. I'm 5' 11 1/2", you're, ummm...something. someone. oh yeah, I'm in love with you. well, I dunno about that anymore what's love? I defined it and it said "sext: an intense feeling of deep attachment". ah, ok, got it. I now understand you, love. this was supposed to be **** ya no, like me running down the back your legs in my red high heels, sending chills through your veins and breaking all of your bones. ****** **** right? **** I ruined it when I brought up love   sext: uh, it's been 3 days since we've talked. I know you said like 3 months ago that we needed to "draw new lines for each other" and "figure out how to have self control and not pounce the other when we're alone and I play smashing pumpkins" but we've ****** like what, 40 times since? and you told me you loved me and begged me not to leave soooooooo....? those lines need to be erased buddy boy sext: uhg. you don't get it. I'm tired.  got so drunk I could barely stand last night. slept for fourty minutes. then worked a thirteen hour shift. I'm sorry. give me a kiss. no? but this is supposed to be a sext? sext: nothing you say is equivalent to a sext these days sext: take your clothes off sext: take your clothes off sext: then take mine off sext: then take mine off sext: you wear mine, I wear yours sext: jk babe the clothes are off we're ******* ******
0
Nov 16, 2014
Nov 16, 2014 at 3:44 AM UTC
sext: and BOOM! satan
sext: wrap me in the blanket that's in the back seat of your car, call her while I'm staring into space, tell her you love her out of no where sext: uuuuuuuuhhhhh......I don't want to move in with you sext: I love you but I'm moving a thousand miles away sext: I love you so I'm moving a thousand miles away sext: I'm moving a thousand miles away BECAUSE I love you sext: I want to bite off your tongue sext: really bad sext: you shouldn't have told her you love her when I was already off the ledge sext: I'll bite your lip, it'll bleed, red will pour down your mouth and your clothes and your horns will poke through and BOOM! satan sext: baby baby BABY you turn me on sext: especially when your actions completely correlate with what I was always told not to do sext: I was told not to do you, but, well....ok we were supposed to hangout at a park like this is a ******* indie movie but this cop told me that park was closed? I didn't know parks ******* close? so we met in a parking lot and you mentioned how your roommate wasn't home and la la la la LAAAAA, we ended up on your living room floor and the carpet was covered in my black lace sext: I'm wearing high heels, tall ones. I'm 5' 11 1/2", you're, ummm...something. someone. oh yeah, I'm in love with you. well, I dunno about that anymore what's love? I defined it and it said "sext: an intense feeling of deep attachment". ah, ok, got it. I now understand you, love. this was supposed to be **** ya no, like me running down the back your legs in my red high heels, sending chills through your veins and breaking all of your bones. ****** **** right? **** I ruined it when I brought up love   sext: uh, it's been 3 days since we've talked. I know you said like 3 months ago that we needed to "draw new lines for each other" and "figure out how to have self control and not pounce the other when we're alone and I play smashing pumpkins" but we've ****** like what, 40 times since? and you told me you loved me and begged me not to leave soooooooo....? those lines need to be erased buddy boy sext: uhg. you don't get it. I'm tired.  got so drunk I could barely stand last night. slept for fourty minutes. then worked a thirteen hour shift. I'm sorry. give me a kiss. no? but this is supposed to be a sext? sext: nothing you say is equivalent to a sext these days sext: take your clothes off sext: take your clothes off sext: then take mine off sext: then take mine off sext: you wear mine, I wear yours sext: jk babe the clothes are off we're ******* ******
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22
roses are red my name is not dave this makes no sense. microwave.
0
Sep 17, 2019
Sep 17, 2019 at 1:36 PM UTC
ummm? cringy poem 3
I can't write I actually physically can't OK OK how about, something with flowers Not like that's been done 1000000000 times I swear to god anymore similes and I will punch my own esophagus This is terrible OK ummm Fish tanks? Fish tanks aren't all that poetic I can't think of anything I think I'm dried up Like an empty... Fish tank ****** Wait a minute What if I just write something about Not knowing what to write That would be easy It also explains why this ***** ******
0
Aug 6, 2018
Aug 6, 2018 at 5:59 PM UTC
******
Teacher: Alright Panda what are your Favorite colors? Me: My favorite colors are Red and Black Teacher: Interesting colors Panda, why are those your colors? Me: I honestly doubt you want to hear the answer to that. Teacher: Come on Panda, tell the class why those are your colors. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- In my head the decision warred to tell but then my life was already hard enough as it was......More and more my demons wanted release so finally I gave in prepared for the looks, name calling, and lonely life again. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Me: you really want to know  why? Teacher: Very much yes, we would Me: Ok then, Red and black are my favorite colors for their meanings. Teacher: And what are their meanings? Me: Red, stands for The blood that is shed during death, The blood that I shed when the knife glides over my skin, The blood that can be heard rushing through your veins when the fear becomes to great....The blood that your heart leaks from the poorly covered cracks from being shattered so many times.... Teacher: (Gulps) And what about black Panda? Me: *Black.....My true color.....Black, stands for the darkness and destruction warring in my mind, body, and soul, The darkness after death, The darkness in my heart from all the hatred thrown at me, The Darkness and destruction from my inner demons who keep warm and safe at night, The Darkness that one day we will all see, because nobody can escape death....Hes one bad-ass Mother ****** who always gets his way....Those are my colors....The colors that make me and I stand for...* Teacher: Ummm....Very...Very Interesting Panda (Gulps and steps away) You know I think it's time for lunch why don't we all go to lunch yea? ( Scurries away) Other students: I told you she was a freak......Crazy......Belongs with the dead if you ask me.....She talks about demons so much I would be surprised if she wasn't one..... Me: Smirks You guys should learn to keep your opinions to your self, they might get you hurt one day.... (Get's up and walks out the door leaving a note for the others) Note- "Roses are Red, Violates are blue, Red like your blood, blue like the sea....Keep on talking soon you will all see who the true demon is and hey it just might be me." Yours truly Panda <3
0
Mar 31, 2015
Mar 31, 2015 at 3:35 PM UTC
My colors
Teacher: Alright Panda what are your Favorite colors? Me: My favorite colors are Red and Black Teacher: Interesting colors Panda, why are those your colors? Me: I honestly doubt you want to hear the answer to that. Teacher: Come on Panda, tell the class why those are your colors. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- In my head the decision warred to tell but then my life was already hard enough as it was......More and more my demons wanted release so finally I gave in prepared for the looks, name calling, and lonely life again. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Me: you really want to know  why? Teacher: Very much yes, we would Me: Ok then, Red and black are my favorite colors for their meanings. Teacher: And what are their meanings? Me: Red, stands for The blood that is shed during death, The blood that I shed when the knife glides over my skin, The blood that can be heard rushing through your veins when the fear becomes to great....The blood that your heart leaks from the poorly covered cracks from being shattered so many times.... Teacher: (Gulps) And what about black Panda? Me: *Black.....My true color.....Black, stands for the darkness and destruction warring in my mind, body, and soul, The darkness after death, The darkness in my heart from all the hatred thrown at me, The Darkness and destruction from my inner demons who keep warm and safe at night, The Darkness that one day we will all see, because nobody can escape death....Hes one bad-ass Mother ****** who always gets his way....Those are my colors....The colors that make me and I stand for...* Teacher: Ummm....Very...Very Interesting Panda (Gulps and steps away) You know I think it's time for lunch why don't we all go to lunch yea? ( Scurries away) Other students: I told you she was a freak......Crazy......Belongs with the dead if you ask me.....She talks about demons so much I would be surprised if she wasn't one..... Me: Smirks You guys should learn to keep your opinions to your self, they might get you hurt one day.... (Get's up and walks out the door leaving a note for the others) Note- "Roses are Red, Violates are blue, Red like your blood, blue like the sea....Keep on talking soon you will all see who the true demon is and hey it just might be me." Yours truly Panda <3
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18
You are my sun, the planets and the asteroids in between, actually, make that the energy that embraces the sun, the elements and trace elements that make up each planet... (Oh, my stars!) You are each perfect petal that unfurls ever so slowly in the morning light, actually, make that the light that kisses each dew drop which awakes each petal with that sweet kiss... (Oh, blush, my buzzing bee!) You are that raindrop that refreshes my parched soul that's stranded in a desert, actually, make that the mirage that proves to be an oasis as my eyes widen in wonderment with the reality of You. (Oh, shucks, my sweet breath!) You are my golden compass whenever I get lost in the wilderness, actually, I wouldn't mind getting lost, if it means that I get lost in your soulful, beautiful eyes Forever (Oh, you cheeseball, you!!) You are the chocolate ganache frosting on that chocolate cake, actually, you are the powdered sugar on my honey-dipped doughnut that brushes my lips, the perfect complement for hot, hot coffee (Oh, honey bun!!) You are the-- Sweetcakes?? You are the freshly ground pepper that dusts softly on my carbonara, I'm just Ahem!!!! You are the freshly ground pepper that dusts softly on my carbonara, actually it would be bland and incomplete without you and--- Hey, babe! huh?! *I'm on dense mode right now, what are you really trying to say? Come on, spill it, I NEVER hear it from you...* Ummm, ummm...I...I... I mean, I-- Out with it, come on!! You can do it---"I...." Hoo! Ok, I... I can do this--- I... (Note to self: This is IT!!!!!) I-- Yesss...?!! I am     the empty, wanting glass and you are the refreshing drink that fills me up, actually,-- ***~BOINKKKKKkkK~ !! I'm walking away now!! Geez, if you can't say IT without all the Fluffy, duffy, Fluff, see me walking away for now...I need the Skinny, the skeleton! Sometimes one just needs to Hear it, you know?! Oh, and I love you,in case you didn't know...but see me walk!*** Hey, honey bunny, smoochie sweetie pie? ...still walking away~~~~ I... huff, huff, huff~~ I am walking towards you... Huff, puff, puff and hufff~! (note to self: Walk on, walk on...) I said I'm walking towards you... ~bump~! and I...    Love          You.
0
Apr 9, 2012
Apr 9, 2012 at 1:09 PM UTC
Huff, Huff, all that Fluff, fluff, fluff, All that Fluff
You are my sun, the planets and the asteroids in between, actually, make that the energy that embraces the sun, the elements and trace elements that make up each planet... (Oh, my stars!) You are each perfect petal that unfurls ever so slowly in the morning light, actually, make that the light that kisses each dew drop which awakes each petal with that sweet kiss... (Oh, blush, my buzzing bee!) You are that raindrop that refreshes my parched soul that's stranded in a desert, actually, make that the mirage that proves to be an oasis as my eyes widen in wonderment with the reality of You. (Oh, shucks, my sweet breath!) You are my golden compass whenever I get lost in the wilderness, actually, I wouldn't mind getting lost, if it means that I get lost in your soulful, beautiful eyes Forever (Oh, you cheeseball, you!!) You are the chocolate ganache frosting on that chocolate cake, actually, you are the powdered sugar on my honey-dipped doughnut that brushes my lips, the perfect complement for hot, hot coffee (Oh, honey bun!!) You are the-- Sweetcakes?? You are the freshly ground pepper that dusts softly on my carbonara, I'm just Ahem!!!! You are the freshly ground pepper that dusts softly on my carbonara, actually it would be bland and incomplete without you and--- Hey, babe! huh?! *I'm on dense mode right now, what are you really trying to say? Come on, spill it, I NEVER hear it from you...* Ummm, ummm...I...I... I mean, I-- Out with it, come on!! You can do it---"I...." Hoo! Ok, I... I can do this--- I... (Note to self: This is IT!!!!!) I-- Yesss...?!! I am     the empty, wanting glass and you are the refreshing drink that fills me up, actually,-- ***~BOINKKKKKkkK~ !! I'm walking away now!! Geez, if you can't say IT without all the Fluffy, duffy, Fluff, see me walking away for now...I need the Skinny, the skeleton! Sometimes one just needs to Hear it, you know?! Oh, and I love you,in case you didn't know...but see me walk!*** Hey, honey bunny, smoochie sweetie pie? ...still walking away~~~~ I... huff, huff, huff~~ I am walking towards you... Huff, puff, puff and hufff~! (note to self: Walk on, walk on...) I said I'm walking towards you... ~bump~! and I...    Love          You.
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60
Cheer up peanut, butter cup. Candy is supposed to be sweet. Not bitter. Unless you're trying to be the dark side of the chocolate bar. But no matter, what ever your taste is. I'll always come back for more. Looks like lust has me ummm uhhh uhh-DICK-ted. Until the Dentist tells me otherwise.
0
Apr 7, 2012
Apr 7, 2012 at 1:55 PM UTC
The Dark Side Of The Chocolate Bar.
Crush: An intense but usually short-lived infatuation. Fantasizing about the relationship that could happen. Shy: Timid, easily frightened away. Although the wanting to just say hey. Wonderwall: Someone you find yourself thinking about all the time, the person you are completely infatuated with. But the wish for all the shyness to disappear is still here. Nervous: Highly excitable; unnaturally or acutely uneasy or apprehensive. The wanting to meet but still playing defensive. Accommodated by umm, uhh, ummm. Hello: Used to express a greeting, answer a telephone, or attract attention. Hi, umm. Don't blow it, don't blow it. Hi! I think you're cute, pretty, adorable, beautiful, lovely, gorgeous. Would you like to go on a date? Date: A social appointment, engagement, or occasion arranged beforehand with another person. She said yes. Happy: Delighted, pleased, or glad, as over a particular thing. She is not just a thing, she is my everything. She makes me very happy. Love: A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. It's a four letter word that can have a million meanings and yet only one. Marry: To take as an intimate life partner by a formal exchange of promises in the manner of a traditional marriage ceremony. I take you to be my wife to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us apart, and this is my solemn vow. I love you. You: You mean so much, Yet I do not have a definition. Because you always seem to surprise me. No words in this dictionary can describe your overall beauty. Amazingly, I'm at a lost of words. Beautiful: The dictionary's crush; A person who is reading this.
0
Jan 6, 2014
Jan 6, 2014 at 9:09 PM UTC
A Dictionary's Love Story
Crush: An intense but usually short-lived infatuation. Fantasizing about the relationship that could happen. Shy: Timid, easily frightened away. Although the wanting to just say hey. Wonderwall: Someone you find yourself thinking about all the time, the person you are completely infatuated with. But the wish for all the shyness to disappear is still here. Nervous: Highly excitable; unnaturally or acutely uneasy or apprehensive. The wanting to meet but still playing defensive. Accommodated by umm, uhh, ummm. Hello: Used to express a greeting, answer a telephone, or attract attention. Hi, umm. Don't blow it, don't blow it. Hi! I think you're cute, pretty, adorable, beautiful, lovely, gorgeous. Would you like to go on a date? Date: A social appointment, engagement, or occasion arranged beforehand with another person. She said yes. Happy: Delighted, pleased, or glad, as over a particular thing. She is not just a thing, she is my everything. She makes me very happy. Love: A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. It's a four letter word that can have a million meanings and yet only one. Marry: To take as an intimate life partner by a formal exchange of promises in the manner of a traditional marriage ceremony. I take you to be my wife to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us apart, and this is my solemn vow. I love you. You: You mean so much, Yet I do not have a definition. Because you always seem to surprise me. No words in this dictionary can describe your overall beauty. Amazingly, I'm at a lost of words. Beautiful: The dictionary's crush; A person who is reading this.
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37
viewing naked body in mirror as if, its not my own; at my age I sometimes wonder, am I still desirable in his eyes? breast are firm, buttocks tight, shapely legs; thigh to ankle toned to wrap around his sinewy waist. belly flat, waist trim, he sneaks up behind; warm lips to nape, his subtle bait to taste me, it's never to late. tongue between breast, I know now as I gaze into those baby browns, I've found my answer. *** appeal is still renown, it shows in his eyes; as I sigh from his touch, ummm!! his lovings never too much. ******* taut from his touch, tongue upon belly and navel; laying on the table, flickers my jewel; making me mewl. purring like a kitten, lapping up my milk; tongue feels like silk, in and out licking; love how he keeps me ticking...yes!!! parting lips; warmly I dip, lightly I sip upon blooming mushroom; pulsating in reddened abloom, spillage slowly from his plume...sweet finger tracing veins poppin', allowing throb to easily drop in; nice and slow watching manhood grow like a framed Van Gogh...he flows ****** self-confidence I'm convinced watching him grow long and dense; taking in every inch, winching in delicious pleasure; his desired measure...sexually self-confident soaped and lathered in wetness
0
Jun 12, 2012
Jun 12, 2012 at 2:55 AM UTC
Sexually Self-Confident
Laying here in this lonely bed Wishing you was here instead I'd snuggled up so warm and tight Fingers tracing over your body so light All the way down to that sacred sweet spot A slight touch there can make you rise, make you hot I tease and I play Never going all the way You roll me over, pen me down Each breast you kiss all the way around You tease you play You never go all the way Back and fourth we play and tease So poetic, with so much ease Between my hips I find your head Ummm I just combust, flood the bed Sadly waking to the alarm of the day Wish I could of slept till the ALL THE WAY
0
Apr 19, 2016
Apr 19, 2016 at 12:42 PM UTC
All the Way
may i feel said he may i feel said he (i'll squeal said she just once said he) it's fun said she (may i touch said he how much said she a lot said he) why not said she (let's go said he not too far said she what's too far said he where you are said she) may i stay said he (which way said she like this said he if you kiss said she may i move said he is it love said she) if you're willing said he (but you're killing said she but it's life said he but your wife said she now said he) ow said she (tiptop said he don't stop said she oh no said he) go slow said she (cccome?said he ummm said she) you're divine!said he (you are Mine said she)
0
May 15, 2015
May 15, 2015 at 10:09 PM UTC
e e cummings
If you were a shrub, you would be a good shrub! Hello! SNIFF You smell different when you're awake! (Courtesy of Kollitiki) I hate a lot of people, but you are not one of them. I also hate ducks. WOW do I ever hate ducks. Hi there! Will you marry me? Wanna come over to my place? I'll show you all 89.3 of my cats! Hey babe, you wanna buy me a drink? Oh, no just water. I'm not allowed alcohol in this bar since the chainsaw incident last month with my exboyfriend.... Look babe, I know this sounds like one of those fake sobs stories made up to get you laid, but how about coming home with me? I have a terminal illness and it would just make my life complete if you would come home with me. Thank you so much baby, bless your soul. Oh, what illness? Ummm ...leprosy.... Tries to be seductive with scalp and elbows I LOVE YOUR FAAAACE!!!!!!! (Courtesy of the ever brilliant Spencer Craig) Your left eyebrow is **** I don't care about my dates having good hair or a lack of BO, so you and I should date. HIIIIIIIII I BAKED YOU A SALAD!!! Here is a fire extinguisher gorgeous ;) .......Sorry for lighting you on fire... Hey babe, did anyone ever tell you? Your eyes are as green as um those green sticky note thingies they sell at Walmart, and your hair is the color of frying pans. Hey cute thing, wanna hear a fun fact? It is physically impossible to lick your elbow. Well, I mean, for you. I meant to say it is physically impossible for YOU to lick your elbow, I could lick your elbow if I wanted, that would be physically possible. (demonstrates your ability to lick the "cute-thing's" elbow) HEY WAIT COME BACK! HEY! WANNA SEE MY SNOWMAN COLLECTION??????? I have your name tattooed on my **** wanna see? (Courtesy of The Girl Who Loved You) Did you fall from heaven? Cause you look a little banged up... (Courtesy of The Girl Who Loved You)
0
Dec 7, 2014
Dec 7, 2014 at 1:15 AM UTC
How not to flirt
If you were a shrub, you would be a good shrub! Hello! SNIFF You smell different when you're awake! (Courtesy of Kollitiki) I hate a lot of people, but you are not one of them. I also hate ducks. WOW do I ever hate ducks. Hi there! Will you marry me? Wanna come over to my place? I'll show you all 89.3 of my cats! Hey babe, you wanna buy me a drink? Oh, no just water. I'm not allowed alcohol in this bar since the chainsaw incident last month with my exboyfriend.... Look babe, I know this sounds like one of those fake sobs stories made up to get you laid, but how about coming home with me? I have a terminal illness and it would just make my life complete if you would come home with me. Thank you so much baby, bless your soul. Oh, what illness? Ummm ...leprosy.... Tries to be seductive with scalp and elbows I LOVE YOUR FAAAACE!!!!!!! (Courtesy of the ever brilliant Spencer Craig) Your left eyebrow is **** I don't care about my dates having good hair or a lack of BO, so you and I should date. HIIIIIIIII I BAKED YOU A SALAD!!! Here is a fire extinguisher gorgeous ;) .......Sorry for lighting you on fire... Hey babe, did anyone ever tell you? Your eyes are as green as um those green sticky note thingies they sell at Walmart, and your hair is the color of frying pans. Hey cute thing, wanna hear a fun fact? It is physically impossible to lick your elbow. Well, I mean, for you. I meant to say it is physically impossible for YOU to lick your elbow, I could lick your elbow if I wanted, that would be physically possible. (demonstrates your ability to lick the "cute-thing's" elbow) HEY WAIT COME BACK! HEY! WANNA SEE MY SNOWMAN COLLECTION??????? I have your name tattooed on my **** wanna see? (Courtesy of The Girl Who Loved You) Did you fall from heaven? Cause you look a little banged up... (Courtesy of The Girl Who Loved You)
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18
Totally awesome speech Makes me smile Totally ruthless words Crack me up If you agree with this fact, come on then… back me up Those amazing phrases in a movie that made you want to yell ‘PREACH!’ Words that leave you lost for words When you’re on your own… glued to the screen and you guffaw Just laugh aloud… and that’s allowed That dumb **** that made you almost crap your pants “A flaming tiger with wings! Dude! That’s like Chinese for shut the f*ck up and dance!” Heard that in a stupid flick It didn’t even take it’s time before tickling the **** of me This film just begun… then started to get stupid quick And there were no mufflers… the curses flowed freely I loved it! Pretentious people going “Awww c’mon now… dude this is sick!” Ummm… for you maybe I have an open minded sense of humour The notion... That one cannot just simply make a joke about a dead baby I may agree with… maybe But I cracked up at the one where the wife says… “I’m taking time off because I’m pregnant.” And the Dictator replies “That’s great! So, are you having a boy… or an abortion?” If you're the touchy type Kindly refrain yourself from taking offense and getting all welled up with emotion.
0
Dec 18, 2012
Dec 18, 2012 at 7:36 AM UTC
Movies that fracture my funny bone
ummm, that's the poem. what it says.
0
Oct 15, 2010
Oct 15, 2010 at 7:57 AM UTC
does anyone wanna smoke a joint?
I kissed those lips so many times, I held you as you caressed me to your will, heat's rising between the two of us & I'm becoming intoxicated by your lustful glares- As you stare deep into my eyes while you deviously - lavishly lick & **** betwixt my legs... Pulsations consuming my very thoughts I was to be the one to ****** once I finished my seductive belly dance... You've surpassed me - grabbing my dancers gear, ripping fabric as you feverishly kissed my gaping- shocked "wide open" mouth. Sweet ecstasy's taking over every part of my being. Your tantalizing tongue   teasing in and out of me as I spread wider for you..... I rant the silence  with lustful passionate screams as wave after seductive  waves pulsate through me all the way to my toes. I'm hurting in a good way as you climb up over me slowly so wondrously slow you enter me, moving deeper ummm deeeeeperrrr..... I feel Oh YESSSS............... I  come wake sadly it's only a dream!
0
May 13, 2010
May 13, 2010 at 10:22 AM UTC
Poets pls help/add to this poem & C how it ends"if it ever do"
Ummm... Hang on I'm thinking...
0
Aug 24, 2013
Aug 24, 2013 at 8:52 AM UTC
'No Strings Attached'
One day, the body decided to choose, they all wanted a say, win or lose. Never knowing who was boss, had made them all tired, on that day, this is what transpired... The heart said "I should be in charge, I'm the toughest muscle and my love is large" Said the feet, "Well, that's not fair. Without me you could go nowhere." The hands spoke up, "Who helps you eat and drives your auto down the street?" "Don't you like your balance, and how we help you dance, without us, you'd never stand a chance" said the arms in unison. "Oh! But I'm not done" entered the heart, singing this tune "I guide you all blindly along, bringing hope and faith, why not sing my song?" This sorely raised the sphincter's ire... "Without me, all you would expire... I'll constipate and blur the eyes, make you weak within the thighs. Make the brain go comatose, dribble on you feet, yea, that would be gross..." ****** says to all, clear as day* "Excuse me! I have something to say! Without me, you'd all be no more, for I give life, you're all a bore. I'm done with this stupid dispute!" "Ummm, excuse me love muffin," says the thighs, "But if I didn't open wide, your point would be mute!" The eyes chimed in, "Look here... Oh, that's right... You cannot see... Who better to guide you along... Without my help, how lost you'd be" "I have a question." said the brain.  "Don't you thin... Oh, wait... Without me you're all nothing. Legs couldn't walk, mouth could not talk, heart wouldn't believe and no one would breathe!" "I'm your pull toy, your magic **** I make the babies... Yes, I be a ***** said Mr. You Know Who "I think you smell funny" laughed the nose,  "Go cry to your mommy,  Boohoo!" "If you think that smells bad," said miss muffin... "Take a lick on this and then get stuffin!" "Don't forget about me! I can hear, I'm important too, I'm your ear!" "Well, I'm more important, I let you all breathe" said the lungs. "Without me you couldn't speak!" said the mouth, sticking out his tongue. Said the sphincter, "I've told you all so... Without me working you'd be slow, you'd grow weak and cease to function and I'll close up with no compunction...."  The other vital organs heard and then conceded without a word and then came the extremities who had no choice but to agree. ***Now you know, this little story goes, you don't need to be a brain to be boss, just an *******
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Oct 2, 2014
Oct 2, 2014 at 1:25 PM UTC
Somebody's In Charge ~~~ Collaboration with Wolf Spirit aka QuinFinn
One day, the body decided to choose, they all wanted a say, win or lose. Never knowing who was boss, had made them all tired, on that day, this is what transpired... The heart said "I should be in charge, I'm the toughest muscle and my love is large" Said the feet, "Well, that's not fair. Without me you could go nowhere." The hands spoke up, "Who helps you eat and drives your auto down the street?" "Don't you like your balance, and how we help you dance, without us, you'd never stand a chance" said the arms in unison. "Oh! But I'm not done" entered the heart, singing this tune "I guide you all blindly along, bringing hope and faith, why not sing my song?" This sorely raised the sphincter's ire... "Without me, all you would expire... I'll constipate and blur the eyes, make you weak within the thighs. Make the brain go comatose, dribble on you feet, yea, that would be gross..." ****** says to all, clear as day* "Excuse me! I have something to say! Without me, you'd all be no more, for I give life, you're all a bore. I'm done with this stupid dispute!" "Ummm, excuse me love muffin," says the thighs, "But if I didn't open wide, your point would be mute!" The eyes chimed in, "Look here... Oh, that's right... You cannot see... Who better to guide you along... Without my help, how lost you'd be" "I have a question." said the brain.  "Don't you thin... Oh, wait... Without me you're all nothing. Legs couldn't walk, mouth could not talk, heart wouldn't believe and no one would breathe!" "I'm your pull toy, your magic **** I make the babies... Yes, I be a ***** said Mr. You Know Who "I think you smell funny" laughed the nose,  "Go cry to your mommy,  Boohoo!" "If you think that smells bad," said miss muffin... "Take a lick on this and then get stuffin!" "Don't forget about me! I can hear, I'm important too, I'm your ear!" "Well, I'm more important, I let you all breathe" said the lungs. "Without me you couldn't speak!" said the mouth, sticking out his tongue. Said the sphincter, "I've told you all so... Without me working you'd be slow, you'd grow weak and cease to function and I'll close up with no compunction...."  The other vital organs heard and then conceded without a word and then came the extremities who had no choice but to agree. ***Now you know, this little story goes, you don't need to be a brain to be boss, just an *******
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ummm!! I'm gonna take his blindfold off for him to savor me with his gaze, eyes roam touchin' me in silent awe; finger tastin', the unthinkable, straddlin', squeezin', teasin' and grazin' nips leavin' wet trails of pleasure upon briny masculinity; listenin' to his heart race, ignites lustful tremors stroked insanity, slippery slit teases; thoughts throb, as thickness swells, swollen senses breathe deeply of soaked scents; flickin' bud betwixt achin' petals...damn! Oooo!...yes!! soft, ebony fingers assault and swirl elicitin' moans and sighs, takin' nips betwixt teeth again as fingers enter swollen honeycomb; overflowin' in sweetness sweat rolls off our body, bitin' nips eruptin' sparks of long awaited aches, dominance partakes its desire, slitherin' along bouquet thighs, blossomed scents flow; emanating moans givin' reason to beg; biting silk sheets, tonguin' his treat actin' like a freak, lovin' me cheek to cheek; playin' me like a symphony strummin' thighs, releasing melodious sighs, sensual cries in sultry lullabies in trebled tempo's in and out of wet tightness, as I blindfold him; complyin' with his ****** whims...takin' me again and again
0
Jun 12, 2012
Jun 12, 2012 at 6:35 AM UTC
Unthinkable Pleasure
The cameras were set  the madman of Hello after snorting so sinus powder was hopped up like a fat kid in a cake factory. So Gonzo any thoughts on the new HP? Gonzo. Well always new they'd find a way to steal my thoughts and secertly mentally **** me and kidnap Mr pickles! Ummm Gonzo Yeah I know thats why im only taking pills from trusted drug dealers like Mother Terresa, And Capt Grabby Hands Are you okay? Gonzo. hmmm  what's it all mean dear lady? sure you  capture me drag me to your dungeon have your way with me take some pics update your facebook status like anyone gives A ****  what you eat for dinner or your a lonley cat lady. but honestly who doest like pussy?' *** your insane and put that away! Gonzo. What i was just getting my trusty  pocket fisherman and my invisble anti earth crab spray. I dont even wanna know. Gonzo. hey ive learned always bring protection no matter how they look the flying monkeys are everywhere!     Ummm do you need help? Gonzo. Ever **** next a man who has no sense of smell  yeah kinda takes all the fun out of it kinda like  some new changes. do like magic miss? Ummm well . Gonzo. check your cooler. Theres nothing in it. Gonzo. MAGIC Now call your sister i bet she's gonna have a baby. Wow how did you know that? Magic? Gonzo. no we've been  having fun after that annoying husban of her's finally goes to work. Hey he's coming over and he ses he's gonna. Hey where'd you go? The interviewers  cell rings. Hello? Gonzo. Magic!
0
Mar 2, 2011
Mar 2, 2011 at 6:45 PM UTC
A Interview With A Madman/No Not Charlie Sheen
The cameras were set  the madman of Hello after snorting so sinus powder was hopped up like a fat kid in a cake factory. So Gonzo any thoughts on the new HP? Gonzo. Well always new they'd find a way to steal my thoughts and secertly mentally **** me and kidnap Mr pickles! Ummm Gonzo Yeah I know thats why im only taking pills from trusted drug dealers like Mother Terresa, And Capt Grabby Hands Are you okay? Gonzo. hmmm  what's it all mean dear lady? sure you  capture me drag me to your dungeon have your way with me take some pics update your facebook status like anyone gives A ****  what you eat for dinner or your a lonley cat lady. but honestly who doest like pussy?' *** your insane and put that away! Gonzo. What i was just getting my trusty  pocket fisherman and my invisble anti earth crab spray. I dont even wanna know. Gonzo. hey ive learned always bring protection no matter how they look the flying monkeys are everywhere!     Ummm do you need help? Gonzo. Ever **** next a man who has no sense of smell  yeah kinda takes all the fun out of it kinda like  some new changes. do like magic miss? Ummm well . Gonzo. check your cooler. Theres nothing in it. Gonzo. MAGIC Now call your sister i bet she's gonna have a baby. Wow how did you know that? Magic? Gonzo. no we've been  having fun after that annoying husban of her's finally goes to work. Hey he's coming over and he ses he's gonna. Hey where'd you go? The interviewers  cell rings. Hello? Gonzo. Magic!
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34
"Ummm... I like you," she said, her voice a trembling whisper. Beads of sweat glistened on her brow, breath uneven, her heart pounding like fragile thunder. She stood in quiet stillness, anticipation pooling in her eyes, her gaze fixed, And then, I felt it a rush of warmth blooming in my chest, nerves tangling with wonder, as if her words were rewriting my very being. For a moment, time stood still and that was when I felt spring in the winter.
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Dec 9, 2024
Dec 9, 2024 at 2:50 PM UTC
Spring in the winter
The Texans Hot sauce The color red Art Poetry Pizza Mexican food Music Eminen Movies My shoes Fruit FOOD! Ummm I'm sure there's more just can't think of anymore atm...
0
Jan 6, 2015
Jan 6, 2015 at 1:34 AM UTC
You know whats awesome
i caught the plague every second hazy every minute vague so well balanced this tribulation that it affects every nation worthless is the medication unless taken with fortification drunken reeling useless feeling pitiless luck...ummm... fruitless duck? ahhhh **** no wait, wait... i got it now adenoidal cow? hormonal sow? the far back reaches of the here and now... the stern of the boat but now the bow.. free blow jobs for Chairman Mao i'm trying to finish this **** but how? rhyming is fun until its not sorry for this ****** poem but no one will read it anyway... sincerely, Marge Schott
0
Jul 19, 2013
Jul 19, 2013 at 12:37 AM UTC
i'm a mindless idiot...
I am as strong as I want to be, because right now I care more about leaning out and taking in as few calories as possible. Losing the pounds in order to gain 'em back, you know? There's very few questions that truly have a right or a wrong answer, and I believe that with 98% of me. Sometimes a right answer simply means it is socially acceptable and a wrong answer is the truth, so in that situation you'd want to throw away your moral compass, clench your jaw, and hope that the lies that come out just result in pearly, shiny teeth. you take a sip of something and it tastes like, ummm.. bad. it tastes like deceit, but that isn't totally possible (OBVIOUSLY), so in a literal sense it just tastes like the Coca Cola syrup that didn't have any carbonated water mixed with it. It's sweet, flavorful, but kind of tastes like it could erode my car engine in a matter of seconds, you know? I feel the sip deep inside of my body, I can feel it trailing down my esophagus (is that what it is?) or maybe just my throat, a tube to my stomach and then to parts of me I better just not try to name out of fear of sounding stupid. fear of sounding stupid drives the majority of things I do, but that's okay, because at least I don't sound stupid. the sip gets caught in the pit of my gut and I start to feel uneasy. I probably should have looked at the bottle before sipping it, huh? I probably should have asked for a detailed list of ingredients like the responsible wanna-be-vegan I should be? I call myself a wannabe most things. its just the person I am. I take a seat because I don't feel good. this is going to hurt, this is going to land me in the hospital probably and might take a whole while to get over. this is turning too literal and I'm trying to beat around the bush, so ill just tell you about the time I took a sip of a coke can and a bee was inside and it flew around in my mouth for a solid 5 seconds before I managed to open, spit, and scream. that could be poetic if you really hunt, like I waited 5 whole seconds to get the monstrous bee out of my ******* mouth, I just sat with a confused look on my face for 5 whole seconds!!! thats a whole giant metaphor! I still swallowed the Coca Cola and it tastes like *** IMAGINE THAT people- poison only takes like poison once you've swallowed it.
0
Sep 14, 2017
Sep 14, 2017 at 6:00 PM UTC
Coca Cola
I am as strong as I want to be, because right now I care more about leaning out and taking in as few calories as possible. Losing the pounds in order to gain 'em back, you know? There's very few questions that truly have a right or a wrong answer, and I believe that with 98% of me. Sometimes a right answer simply means it is socially acceptable and a wrong answer is the truth, so in that situation you'd want to throw away your moral compass, clench your jaw, and hope that the lies that come out just result in pearly, shiny teeth. you take a sip of something and it tastes like, ummm.. bad. it tastes like deceit, but that isn't totally possible (OBVIOUSLY), so in a literal sense it just tastes like the Coca Cola syrup that didn't have any carbonated water mixed with it. It's sweet, flavorful, but kind of tastes like it could erode my car engine in a matter of seconds, you know? I feel the sip deep inside of my body, I can feel it trailing down my esophagus (is that what it is?) or maybe just my throat, a tube to my stomach and then to parts of me I better just not try to name out of fear of sounding stupid. fear of sounding stupid drives the majority of things I do, but that's okay, because at least I don't sound stupid. the sip gets caught in the pit of my gut and I start to feel uneasy. I probably should have looked at the bottle before sipping it, huh? I probably should have asked for a detailed list of ingredients like the responsible wanna-be-vegan I should be? I call myself a wannabe most things. its just the person I am. I take a seat because I don't feel good. this is going to hurt, this is going to land me in the hospital probably and might take a whole while to get over. this is turning too literal and I'm trying to beat around the bush, so ill just tell you about the time I took a sip of a coke can and a bee was inside and it flew around in my mouth for a solid 5 seconds before I managed to open, spit, and scream. that could be poetic if you really hunt, like I waited 5 whole seconds to get the monstrous bee out of my ******* mouth, I just sat with a confused look on my face for 5 whole seconds!!! thats a whole giant metaphor! I still swallowed the Coca Cola and it tastes like *** IMAGINE THAT people- poison only takes like poison once you've swallowed it.
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