"reddit" poems
Hello
A gesture perceived as formless waves in the Web
Perhaps a luring trap to be caught
or a silent cry as print Scarcely Red
Maybe you
Reddit or Won't
As text is the voice of this generation
Quote
ILY My fam is so cute
#Hashbrowns @MyBFFFFs
Last looks of a father as he leaves
with a dry cleaned suit.
The last breakfast I ate with my family
Together. Rebuked.
Now it lays archived in the mind of i
A memory fragment less intact
than the Colossus of Rhodes
What's that? Let me Google that.
What will become of the crowd
The voices, in their plight are
"Like wow, Laughing Out Loud"
Like apathy is the new trend
Can we even say there is a greater purpose
of the time we Spend.
Nov 11, 2014
Nov 11, 2014 at 6:01 PM UTC
I've done a lot of things I'm not proud of
but I can't be tied to those forever
so people forgive and forget
I try to forget but still feel bad
and I know there are still sore subjects
that I should be sensitive about.
Scrolling through Reddit I see a post
of Māori students at an airport
greeting their returning teacher
with a traditional Māori war dance
which was an admittedly sweet gesture
but something didn't sit right with me.
I wondered why the students greeting their teacher
had to do so through a display of militaristic nationalism
I wondered if that was the last dance the Moriori people saw
before the Māori genocided them for their resources
I wondered if the Māori danced like that
as they ***** murdered, and cannibalized the Moriori.
Wondering all of this made me ask myself:
Why did they have to greet their teacher like that?
The students wanted to make a big gesture
which dancing is perfect for
but dancing can also be vulnerable and embarrassing
because people may mock how you express yourself
but strangers at the airport are less likely to laugh at you
if you're doing a synchronized dance with a group of people
and the dancing is recognizably tied to national identity
because then it's a culturally rich dance
you're a xenophobe for laughing at
and that's what nationalism is:
strength in numbers and a readymade identity
in lieu of an individual personality
oftentimes for the sake of pistanthrophobia.
So as I read the circlejerking comments on the post
I wondered what the difference is between
a Māori war dance and a **** salute
I guess the Māori people have experienced
more oppression than Nazis
but nationalism is nationalism
and those who have oppressed are oppressors
and many who are oppressed would gladly
be oppressors given the chance.
Nationalism isn't healthy for culture
and often isolates people from other cultures
that are all combining due to globalization
which people fight to preserve their little dances and costumes
so we can stay in eternal conflict over delusions of supremacy
when the only nationality should be a global one.
Aug 28, 2022
Aug 28, 2022 at 8:41 PM UTC
So many cool things to do
so many fun, and interesting things to do
so many intoxicating things to stimulate the senses
which, are always on march and parade
DOPAMINE
I stay chasing the next exciting thing
the spectacle, the stimulation, music, promise
but mostly I work my life away
and then I drink, after
Then the internet stimulates me: Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, Instagram
Goodreads, Reddit
the next fix,
always the next fix
not where I want to be
you can only be in one place
I think my mind wants to be, in all places at once
then, you get bored
******* bored
that's there again
Then minutes, moments, seconds move fast
out of your life
Alan Watts said, "thoughts are addictive," I know what he means
he's not speaking in riddles
A lot of times, it's just best not to think
Somewhere in complete isolation
with no one talking to you, or speaking to you
eventually the voices and thoughts go away
and you can cleanse yourself
Hopefully
Jan 28, 2016
Jan 28, 2016 at 9:21 PM UTC
Feathered Fiends
by Michael R. Burch
Fascists of a feather
flock together.
Alternate:
Conformists of a feather
flock together.
I came up with the "Fascists of a Feather" epigram after Donald Trump repeatedly praised authoritarian "strong men" like Vladimir Putin, Kim Jong Un, Rodrigo Duterte, Xi Jinping and Recep Tayyip Erdoğan. Heroic Americans fought a war against fascism and many of them paid the ultimate price, so why is Trump giving comfort to the enemy of democracy?
The alternate version of this couplet was written first and won a National Couplet Contest sponsored by the Society of Classical Poets. The couplet has now been published in one form or another on the websites of major newspapers and news services like TheHill.com, Haaretz.com (Israel), Crikey.com (Australia), Cleveland.com (as the headline of a letter to the editor), Reddit Political Humor, and Humane Conservatives Unite Blog. Sometimes the epigram is quoted in reader comments, sometimes by the writers of letters to the editor, and sometimes within articles.
Keywords/Tags: fascists, flock, together, fascism, conformists, nazis, blackshirts, brownshirts, dictator, tyrant, autocrat, despot, totalitarian, cultist, militarist
Mar 25, 2020
Mar 25, 2020 at 12:48 AM UTC
Hie Yamaha Wegman ****** voyager, voted vonage valuable, unrepentant TIME Magazine subscriber. Spotify sportsman Snapchat smartly. Sleuth slenderman silences Shutterfly schvitzing. Saxby sassy Santander sais sage rues rudimentary router rotorooter.
Royale Rococco rigged remarkably regular referee reefers red reddit reeder recuperating. Reconnaissance recluse really rabid. QVC quotient quoting, quo quoi quivering quite quirky. Quisling quipped. Quintuplets quintessentially quiet. Quids Quicken questions.
Quartermaster qualified quaint quaffing quadrilateral Pythons. Pyrex pylons put purdy purposeful puny punsters punching. Pumpkin pumice publicized prudential protean pros properly pronouncing prolific prodigies.
Proletariats professors' problematic. Pro privileges prioritized. Principle primates prevaricate. Preppy pregnant, praying prattler possibly Porgie. Poseidon pooping poodle ponders poppycock. Plum? Polite poison pods ply pitiful pinterest.
Pinhead Pillsbury pillager Pi. Pigskin pierce petsmart pests permanently. Perdition percolates peppered PennState pedigreed PearlJam Patagonian. Pastor pastes passion passably. Papas' paginated orbitz okayed. Nutty node needs money.
Next netzero nee naugahyde. Nattering nationwide nabob Moxie Molly McGee. Monosodium livingsocial joyus je kickstarter. Identityguard Huffington GMO. Gluten Glutamate footloose fancy free footlocker. Fingerhut fetishistic fabrication Cingular.
Feb 3, 2018
Feb 3, 2018 at 9:47 PM UTC
Our Facebook, who art online
Hashtag be thy name
Thy fan-page grow
Thy tweets be pinned
On blogs as they are on Reddit
Give us this day, our subscription e-mail
And forgive us for our down thumbs
As we forgive those who down thumb against us
Lead us not into MySpace
But deliver us from false avatars
For thine is the internet and our time
And our souls
Forever and ever
Amen
Aug 30, 2013
Aug 30, 2013 at 4:32 PM UTC
When I have fears I won’t get likes
After posting my senseless selfie (taken in my bathroom),
After tweeting a witty, wasted “Yikes!”
Upon seeing the latest Cyrus escapade on Reddit come afternoon;
When I behold, upon night’s starred face,
I see it through my IPhone’s two-dimensional screen,
And I think that’s what’ll get the rest of the race
To notice me, after all I’m important – I don’t mean
To demean, but I’m the fairest creature of the hour;
I sometimes fear that you shall never look upon me,
Well I never have to worry for now I have the power
Of unreserved reticence to bestow upon thee –
**** the hollowed experience, the heart, the mind lag;
For my exhausted existence has been validated #420yoloswag.
Nov 20, 2013
Nov 20, 2013 at 3:54 PM UTC
Unsolicited advice
against its storm I brace
Showing no fear or shame
as they get up in my face
In other words ...
They tell me to zig
when I'm zagging
"Hurry up man!"
when I'm lagging
"That's not the way
I'd do it!" they opine
"Better listen to me,
get to it!" every time
Hmm, if that's true
then I'll know
just what to do
when I am you!
More precisely ...
When I do what you say
in my own peculiar way
You stand
beaming with pride
taking credit
If I dare to complain
you declare me insane
then expose me to
ridicule on Reddit
(You don't regret it—
there, I've said it!)
Now I had my say
what will you do?
Hopefully MYOB
not misconstrue
"We just told you
the best way to go
You must listen to us
don’t you know?”
Thanks! If that's true
then I'll know
just what to do
when I am you!
As odd as that sounds
it must be true
I'll be doing sooo much better
when I am you!
8/20/2022
Poetry form: Lyric
A sauté of unsolicited advice with a dash of fun. All we're trying to do is get rid of the bitterness and make the rest of the flavors pop. Yummy!
Mark Toney © 2022
Aug 20, 2022
Aug 20, 2022 at 2:37 PM UTC
How I long to understand
Why we are so underhand
And throw away our lives for ownership
Who owns blossom on the tree
The gardener or the cherry
Should the bumble bee own the scrip
Twist your tendons and minds
Embers fly as the axe grinds
Just to avoid tongues cracking whip
Drunken on your earned credit
The latest "must buy" on Reddit
Who knew owning could be so hip
Time ticks and you get old
Till the day your body's cold
Then all your stuff cast in the skip
The bee flies from the tree
Pollen laden to the colony
Careless of your past "ownership"
The dollar turns into a cent
All you "owned" was just for rent
Space owns time, which owns your little blip.
Apr 12, 2015
Apr 12, 2015 at 3:29 PM UTC
Let me begin by saying that
this is not me asking you out.
This is me telling you,
and countless others on the internet,
that I think you're a really great person.
You are an incredibly kind person,
and honestly, I'm surprised that my asshole-ish
ways haven't scared you off by now.
Now see, the thing is that
when I first saw you
I asked my friend who you were and
she called you "Reddit Man"
to which I scoffed,
because it sounded like you were a off brand superhero.
On the next day I saw you again,
I did that stupid thing
where I slid up to where you were sitting
and the words
"So I hear you like Dungeons and Dragons."
fell clumsily out of my mouth and I
I turned red because that is not what I wanted to say.
It has been approximately forty-three days
since those stupid words clumsily fell out of my mouth
and we haven't talked about DnD since.
We have, however, talked about Reddit,
Jake Hill,
suicide,
alcoholism,
stalkerish 14-year-old girls,
crazy exes,
waluigi not being in smash,
and dogs vs cats,
among other things.
Its been about two months
and somehow,
even when I stole courage
from the burning sensation in my throat when I sip on liquid fire,
I still have not said a word to you about how I feel.
I wonder if maybe it was obvious,
in the way I talked to you,
about you.
or in the way I blushed when I so much as brushed up against you in line during lunch, or in the way I laughed at all your jokes, as if everything you say is humorous.
Let me reiterate the fact that
I am not writing this to ask you out.
But to instead let you in on how I feel about things other than my own death and the possibility of me flying to a foreign country and not coming back for a few years.
And, yeah, this is a bit childish,
writing an awkward sort of love letter,
in hopes of you never seeing it,
or if you do see it, I'll mostly likely be moved on to other things.
But in all honesty I probably won't even mention this to you, until I'm in college and I message you out of curiosity to how that open heart surgery went.
and now, that its been over a year,
I'm finally in college, and
I'd still like to ask
how that operation went,
and if when they opened up your chest
if your heart was as broken as you told me it was.
Mar 24, 2019
Mar 24, 2019 at 6:16 PM UTC
*Click
light, energy breathes in
the machine comes to life
knows nothing, new and fresh
see symbols, hear clicks
one room full of ONE thousand friends
facebook, twitter, reddit, youtube
tweet, like, spread, watch
program after program
you spread what you thought
another mega byte out of your life
data stored in the "cloud"
past saved in imaginary space
enter the net to endure a flix
another box opens but this ones RED!
open another portal and jump on in
tab to google to find your best friend
can't ask for direction it shows where you live
words of the past, "call me"
now instead skype, oovoo, tiny chat ME
glitch in the system, there's an upgrade for that
version 1.29875CYBORG
complete!
*click
the energy goes down and your world is DEAD
walk outside when you want ONE real friend
Jun 16, 2012
Jun 16, 2012 at 7:04 AM UTC
The light from my cell phone shines brightly
in my bedroom at night. My eyes
thank the content creators
who format their memes on
Reddit with dark shades
so depression
won't hurt me
outside
too.
Jan 15, 2019
Jan 15, 2019 at 3:17 PM UTC
There was a screech, a crash, a horn,
as blood was spilt and flesh was torn,
there was no air with which to yell,
as soul slipped out and spirit fell.
Down and down the spectre tumbled,
far from life and metal crumpled,
til at last his body hovered,
secrets flayed and thoughts uncovered
The man cried out, his fear was warrant
Here beside the mighty Torrent,
Ages passed as seconds ticked
He'd read the stories, he'd read of Styx.
To the man ole' Charon staggered,
beard unkempt and cheeks a' haggard,
hand outstretched, although he knew,
he would not get the penance due.
"I've got no coin, or cash or credit,
All I have is gold from Reddit."
Charon shook, then said with glee
"Redditors get in for free."
Jun 12, 2014
Jun 12, 2014 at 9:57 AM UTC
Enter here
I have been twittered tweeted chat roulette a few
Tumbled flickered facebooked too
Instantagramed even reddit
Haven’t been face to face in months
Human contact
Leaves me here in cyberspace
Leaves me wanting waiting anticipating
A warm whisper
A single finger slowly moving down my arm
A kiss on the forehead
A loving embrace full of passion for me
Smiles with dimples that glow the room like sunlight
Twinkles in the eyes as laughter bubbles beneath the surface
A single sigh of satisfaction but alas
I google yahoo asked and binged
I search for love
Yet
It’s back to the internet
To hide and bide my time.
May 1, 2013
May 1, 2013 at 6:37 AM UTC
Just beyond the fogged black glass
Boston slides by as a fresh smear
Huddled between low green hills
Laced with fading white.
Worship swells inside
The blue nimbus hive
As Boltbus pilgrims bow before
Their tiny twitching screens.
Praise god from whom all content flows
Praise god for wireless here below
Praise Stephen Jobs, ye gen-y host
Praise Reddit, Fox News and Huffington Post.
Salvation in the *** of Kim Kardashian.
And the green is sliding by
Blurring truth in soft blue sky
Eternity in deep gray stone
Ignored into silence.
Dec 29, 2016
Dec 29, 2016 at 10:37 PM UTC
Darkness surrounds me,
My left arm holds
My iPhone aloft.
A light shines down on
My face. Its pale face
A light in the darkness.
Beside me is my lover,
She -- worlds away in dreams.
I read the words
From worlds away
On Twitter.
On Facebook.
On Reddit.
Netflix draws me in.
My phone,
With white face
And shrouded in darkness,
Holds her chord,
scythe-like
Across my chest.
Serving to sever my soul
From this life around me.
Merely a psychopomp,
The reaper ushers
Souls into the abyss.
They lose touch with this world.
I lose touch with this world.
My mind is worlds away.
I lose touch with this life.
Mar 10, 2015
Mar 10, 2015 at 7:20 PM UTC
You'll be twenty anyways.
You're hesitant because you know your hairs will gray,
but you'll be twenty anyways.
You'll be thirty either way.
between the sheets of snow and stressful days.
you know you'll be thirty anyways.
Come forty and fifty,
then eighty and one-hundred;
Ninety-three, ninety four
then one-hundred and one dozen.
No matter which way or when,
all help from friends and cousins,
you'll be thirty anyways.
Jan 31, 2019
Jan 31, 2019 at 6:23 PM UTC
While you’re sleeping
The spiders bathe in your nightstand water
As the mosquitos play you Copeland’s “Fanfare For The Common Man”
The worms use you as a blanket
The bees outside your window spread rumors about the Praying Mantis
The roaches climb the bedpost to get a better view
and the ants want to be left alone cause they’re too busy working on their own things
while the Praying Mantis makes a move on the Brown Widow
It’s actually not a widow it’s a Brown Recluse according my roommate, Charlie
He tells me their bites are harmless
But I don’t believe him
So I take a picture and ask someone on reddit spiders
and they tell me it looks like a Brown Widow but the photo quality isn’t too clear
I mean I got up as close as I could to take the picture
And we should really call an exterminator
Because the Ladybugs now won’t shut up about the Mantis
And the Moths are making a mess in the kitchen
And it’s really Gal the landlords job to handle it
But he’s too busy being a heart surgeon on the side so I guess I’ll have to do it
I’ll call today. I’ll call now.
Jan 29, 2020
Jan 29, 2020 at 5:09 PM UTC
Reddit
You are a bunch
Of snowflakes
There is a difference
From normal to terrorism
There is a difference
Between a Muslim extremist
And a flipping Buddhist.
When will this BS of racism
And bigotry
End??!!
Jeeze!!!!!
Mar 9, 2019
Mar 9, 2019 at 1:17 PM UTC
This monster inside me
hunts for your internet breadcrumbs
facebook pictures
reddit comments
spotify playlists
and wants to slaughter the ***** from that post and smear her all over your wall.
She wants to chop off her hair
die it purple
pierce her nose
learn guitar
and sing cryptic hate songs to you in her own ******* band.
She wants to text you and ignore the response
tease you
taunt you
**** you
until you want her so bad it kills.
But all of that is no good because you're still in my head
making decisions
haunting my thoughts
until I go insane
Because nothing I do will give me you, the way you were.
Feb 8, 2016
Feb 8, 2016 at 9:52 AM UTC