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"fags" poems
One thread came loose with alcoholism at a very young age. She recovered. She forgot and proceeded. One thread was yanked loose by a growing tendency to self sabotage. She clawed her way out of the spiral. One thread pulled at others when she learnt she didn’t need alcohol to have a good time. She felt deprived by self-restraint. So she slightly caved. One thread burned along with her personality when she became a stoner again. She was suffocated yet high. One thread was singed by **** She fell back into her ***** habits. She found herself here, but not quite present. She became dependant. As she flooded her body parts with superficial happiness, just a quick release, her mouth grew dry. Then the peeling skin on her stained lips began to stick together and she regressed into a still and faded silence. In the end, she was in shreds and blissfully unaware, alone with nothing but one solitary thread left to grasp at.
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Jan 7, 2019
Jan 7, 2019 at 7:30 PM UTC
Shreds of She
How tenuous this grip we have, how slight our hold remains When all around  loud braggards boast that power now pertains, We see the banner headlines splashed across our daily rags And redneck demonstrations cleans the streets of Spics and **** When blood runs in the gutter as the battons rise and fall And whilst taking tea in style the filthy rich ignore it all. The blonde leader of our nation struts, postulates and brags While the rest of us skive off around the corner smoking **** Our  kids ingest confusion as they loiter on the street Unknowing  our delusions make illusions held, replete. How tenuous the grip we have, how slight our hold remains As our allies shower cold distrust convinced our fault inflames. What chance of clear redemption, what remedies revive When truth is lost to darkness can our honesty survive? Reputation cut to shards, confidences ****** That leaders of community no longer hold our trust When white is caste as black and then to green and then to grey And sanity refuses pontification one more day. How tenuous the grip we have, how slight our holds remain As twilight turns to darkness caste against a larks’ refrain. M. The White House HAMILTON, New Zealand 25 July 2018
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Jul 25, 2018
Jul 25, 2018 at 1:36 AM UTC
How Tenuous the Grip We Have?
bowling pin serenity   white and controlled everyone loves the separatism as it is encouraged and propagated revolution as a fad for **** right to buy, die, fry, and try skin-color guarantee Paul Mooney, “complection for protection” meaning my pigment protects me from what…. I experience the loss of loved ones to cancer and illness I suffer years of addiction and the lasting effects of liver damage I am poor, was raised in poverty my skin means nothing to the bill collectors or the tax man or the capitalist system do I not suffer the slow poisoning of industrialization of globalization infection rejection …… We all sit as slaves in this new America I just happen to be in the front of the bus
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Mar 12, 2014
Mar 12, 2014 at 12:32 PM UTC
Human Race-ism
Spirits may come spirits may go. The only talk to those they know. Those who have a lending ear and listen to the others here. Usually grey haired old bags with 20 cats and 40 **** But Anna isn't quite the same she's not what visitors expect. She greets each one with a smile. But their eyes can't see they miss by miles! Instead the look upon her chest, for what a smashing pair of ******* I even think the spooks just come to take a peak at her *** Imagine that a ghost on top with an enormous supernatural **** Slid between her silky legs until she screams and begs and begs. A medium she thought it was, in fact it was an XL **** A frenzy in the reading room as more arrive to see her moan. It's like a wiken **** now, at 44 she's in her prime. I wonder who will "come" next time. The psychic circle all a gasp, are playing with their mortal tackle. Who would have thought she wore a basque, underneath a witches tac. Now its like a wanking club, spooks and mortals all a tug. finally she howls with delight. Another soul has seen the light! So remember when you see her pass check her **** and little *** imagine she's on top of you in stockings basque and heels to. Though one thing you should bare in mind... Unless your dead forget it mate!
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Jul 29, 2013
Jul 29, 2013 at 4:20 PM UTC
Blue eyed seer
Mud is good, Its dead good mud, It's in me blood, But where not understood, Us people of mud, In the shadow of a gas tank and born on a Mersey bank, I lived on cobbled streets dark and dank, I played on a ship that sank, and for anything else I wouldn’t thank....... you On king street docks, girls in cheap frocks, curly locks, time tocks, the boat rocks, The tanyard smell made life hell for all that dwell, under the bridge, In Garston L19, it’s the scene, its clean, it’s where I’ve been, it’s not obscene or green, if you know what I mean. Its community security sincerity and every other word that ends with erity, But it’s fallen apart, Don’t lose heart. I go into town when I’m down, it clears me frown, I don’t go in me jarmies or me dressin gown, There’s men with round bellies, toddlers in wellies, Posh ladies gather in their marks and spencer swagger, There’s scouse brow teens, sunbed queens, Hunks and punks, lonely drunks, Suits in boots forgetting their roots and hens in ***** Big issue sellers, statue fellas holding golf umbrellas, Coz of all the rain, But it’s all good, coz we come from mud, Let’s cheer, why? Coz I’m here, I’m me, me names T, and me hubbys P me best friends she..... lagh, I like coffee and toffee and Roger Mcgoughy, I like statistics logistics eye shadow and lipsticks, I like bags and wags and cigarette **** but not beer, I’m fine on wine if I take me time, I don’t do a line, unless I’m hanging me washing on it, I work in a bar, not far, I don’t drive a car, and I don’t say Lar or kid or lad or lid or mar, I’m proud and loud, don’t live on a cloud, and I don’t follow the crowd, I’m a mum to some, I’ve got a big round *** but I’m me you see, I’m not square, I dye me hair, I swear but you can take me anywhere, Coz I care, I’m good, I’m mud; it’s in me blood, Understood By Christina Ford
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Feb 3, 2014
Feb 3, 2014 at 7:23 PM UTC
Mud
Mud is good, Its dead good mud, It's in me blood, But where not understood, Us people of mud, In the shadow of a gas tank and born on a Mersey bank, I lived on cobbled streets dark and dank, I played on a ship that sank, and for anything else I wouldn’t thank....... you On king street docks, girls in cheap frocks, curly locks, time tocks, the boat rocks, The tanyard smell made life hell for all that dwell, under the bridge, In Garston L19, it’s the scene, its clean, it’s where I’ve been, it’s not obscene or green, if you know what I mean. Its community security sincerity and every other word that ends with erity, But it’s fallen apart, Don’t lose heart. I go into town when I’m down, it clears me frown, I don’t go in me jarmies or me dressin gown, There’s men with round bellies, toddlers in wellies, Posh ladies gather in their marks and spencer swagger, There’s scouse brow teens, sunbed queens, Hunks and punks, lonely drunks, Suits in boots forgetting their roots and hens in ***** Big issue sellers, statue fellas holding golf umbrellas, Coz of all the rain, But it’s all good, coz we come from mud, Let’s cheer, why? Coz I’m here, I’m me, me names T, and me hubbys P me best friends she..... lagh, I like coffee and toffee and Roger Mcgoughy, I like statistics logistics eye shadow and lipsticks, I like bags and wags and cigarette **** but not beer, I’m fine on wine if I take me time, I don’t do a line, unless I’m hanging me washing on it, I work in a bar, not far, I don’t drive a car, and I don’t say Lar or kid or lad or lid or mar, I’m proud and loud, don’t live on a cloud, and I don’t follow the crowd, I’m a mum to some, I’ve got a big round *** but I’m me you see, I’m not square, I dye me hair, I swear but you can take me anywhere, Coz I care, I’m good, I’m mud; it’s in me blood, Understood By Christina Ford
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**IMMEDIATELY PLEASE REMOVE ALL OF MY INFORMATION FROM YOUR DATA BASE FORTHWITH.  ALSO, ADVISE ANY AND ALL CONTRACTORS, SUB-CONTRACTORS, AGENTS, SUB-AGENTS, AFFILIATES, PARTNERS, COLLEAGUES, ASSOCIATES, CLIENTS, WEBMASTERS, WEB BASED LINKS, WINKS, TWINKS, COLONEL CLINCKS, BOSSES, CO-WORKERS, EMPLOYEES, VENDORS, SUPPLIERS, SALESMEN, ASCCOUNT REPS/EXCS, ACCOUNTANTS, BROKERS, CO-BROKERS, HACKERS, SLACKERS, WHACKERS, JERKS, PIMPS, HOES, HOBOS, BUMS, DERELICTS, DEGENERATES, DOPERS, DEALERS, TWEEKERS, GAMBLERS, RAMBLERS, SOLICITORS, SIDEKICKS, COHORTS, WINGMEN, WHEELMEN, LOOKOUTS, OUTLAWS, IN-LAWS, RELATIVES, FIANCES, GIRLFRIENDS, BOYFRIENDS, FAMILY, FRIENDS, ENEMIES, EVIL NEMISIS', CANVASSERS, INQUIRERS, QUEERS, QUEENS, COWBOYS, KINGS, **** DRAGS, HAGS, HETEROS, HOMOS, TONY ROMOS, FEMALE IMPERSONATORS, (PRE OR POST) MALE IMPERSONATORS, ***** ***** VAN ***** **** VAN **** LESBIANS, LIARS, BUYERS, CRYERS, CIGAR SMOKERS, CARPET MUNCHERS, RUG RATS, TODDLERS, TEENAGERS, YOUNGSTERS, SENIORS, SUCKERS, TRUCKERS, MOTHER shut yer mouth, LAW MAKERS, LAWYERS, ATTORNEYS, JUDGES, POLITICIANS, PECKERWOODS, LEADERS, FOLLOWERS, DISCIPLES, PROPHETS, EVANGELISTS, SAVIORS, SINNERS, SAINTS, SOOTHSAYERS, MEDICINE MEN, GYPSYS, TRAMPS, AND THIEVES, WITCHES, WARLOCKS, VAMPIRES, LYCANS, ZOMBIES, WAR MONGERS, PROTESTERS, SOLIDERS, GENERALS, GOVERNORS, PRESIDENTS, PATRIOTS, PACKERS, LIONS, BEARS, BROWNS, BLACKHAWKS, REDWINGS, RIGHT WING, LIBERALS, OR LAW BIDING CITIZENS, THEY ARE NOT TO CONTACT ME AND LOOSE MY NUMBER. BUT IF YOU SEE MY MOM, TELL HER TO CALL ME. ........................................................................BA-ZING....................................................................**
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Dec 27, 2013
Dec 27, 2013 at 9:47 AM UTC
SPAMMER SMACKDOWN
**IMMEDIATELY PLEASE REMOVE ALL OF MY INFORMATION FROM YOUR DATA BASE FORTHWITH.  ALSO, ADVISE ANY AND ALL CONTRACTORS, SUB-CONTRACTORS, AGENTS, SUB-AGENTS, AFFILIATES, PARTNERS, COLLEAGUES, ASSOCIATES, CLIENTS, WEBMASTERS, WEB BASED LINKS, WINKS, TWINKS, COLONEL CLINCKS, BOSSES, CO-WORKERS, EMPLOYEES, VENDORS, SUPPLIERS, SALESMEN, ASCCOUNT REPS/EXCS, ACCOUNTANTS, BROKERS, CO-BROKERS, HACKERS, SLACKERS, WHACKERS, JERKS, PIMPS, HOES, HOBOS, BUMS, DERELICTS, DEGENERATES, DOPERS, DEALERS, TWEEKERS, GAMBLERS, RAMBLERS, SOLICITORS, SIDEKICKS, COHORTS, WINGMEN, WHEELMEN, LOOKOUTS, OUTLAWS, IN-LAWS, RELATIVES, FIANCES, GIRLFRIENDS, BOYFRIENDS, FAMILY, FRIENDS, ENEMIES, EVIL NEMISIS', CANVASSERS, INQUIRERS, QUEERS, QUEENS, COWBOYS, KINGS, **** DRAGS, HAGS, HETEROS, HOMOS, TONY ROMOS, FEMALE IMPERSONATORS, (PRE OR POST) MALE IMPERSONATORS, ***** ***** VAN ***** **** VAN **** LESBIANS, LIARS, BUYERS, CRYERS, CIGAR SMOKERS, CARPET MUNCHERS, RUG RATS, TODDLERS, TEENAGERS, YOUNGSTERS, SENIORS, SUCKERS, TRUCKERS, MOTHER shut yer mouth, LAW MAKERS, LAWYERS, ATTORNEYS, JUDGES, POLITICIANS, PECKERWOODS, LEADERS, FOLLOWERS, DISCIPLES, PROPHETS, EVANGELISTS, SAVIORS, SINNERS, SAINTS, SOOTHSAYERS, MEDICINE MEN, GYPSYS, TRAMPS, AND THIEVES, WITCHES, WARLOCKS, VAMPIRES, LYCANS, ZOMBIES, WAR MONGERS, PROTESTERS, SOLIDERS, GENERALS, GOVERNORS, PRESIDENTS, PATRIOTS, PACKERS, LIONS, BEARS, BROWNS, BLACKHAWKS, REDWINGS, RIGHT WING, LIBERALS, OR LAW BIDING CITIZENS, THEY ARE NOT TO CONTACT ME AND LOOSE MY NUMBER. BUT IF YOU SEE MY MOM, TELL HER TO CALL ME. ........................................................................BA-ZING....................................................................**
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4
Give us burn-outs, bars, and battered schools, Streets of litter, needles, walls, Smoke and smog and drugs and drab, ****** and heartbreak, liquor, **** Fury, fuck-ups, fear and fights, Cut down trees, and sleepless nights; Polluted rivers, dead-end jobs, Tell us that there is no god. Then wake up each and every morning, Embrace and kindle global warming; Watch as wars and famine strive, And watch your poems come alive. For that is what we writers need.
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May 28, 2014
May 28, 2014 at 6:43 PM UTC
What We Writers Need.
I find as I get older I have to censor what I say I can't say that a happy man Seems very, very, gay I never got the memo When certain words were made taboo I never got that message I' missed that one , did you? My Nan would send my brother To the shops to get her **** I know we aren't allowed to say this I've been told by P.C nags I remember the old story Of Black Peter and St. Nick Now you can't say either one or you'd be branded quite the ***** There, I used another one ***** somehow made the list Has anyone seen the memo It's the one note that I missed You must call someone Richard You cannot call him **** **** political correctness Just brought me back to ***** If you sit and watch the telly you can't put your feet up on a **** that gets us back to gay again The PC folks would hit the roof Don't start me on Brazil nuts Remember what we all called those ? If I put that down in writing I'd be PC'd in the nose Men and Women are all persons This PC stuff just makes me sick But, just look at them both naked There, I've worked back round to ***** It takes the fun out of saying swear words You have to censor all the time There might be a PC zealot waiting for a language crime So, in closing let me tell you And I will do it with some class They can take their PC memo And shove it up their....buttocks (I think is the term used nowadays)!
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Jul 26, 2012
Jul 26, 2012 at 8:19 PM UTC
PC correctness and words
When I go on a poetic rant I call it my **** out sunbathing and boy do I flash them whilst I am still breathing I am trying to help other writers just to overcome their fears as I have become fearless with devotion, so many years You get to a stage or maybe an age that you care not what people are saying when you have your **** out sunbathing Yes, I know I am rather brash smoking **** and flicking ash drinking till the sun cries morning a new day of poetry, just dawning So as a would be sage twenty first century made I do hope to empower writing is a life time, and not just hours I write for the love of it help all of this art waiting for I am a **** for the art with my **** out sunbathing By Christos Andreas Kourtis aka NeonSolaris By NeonSolaris © 2013 NeonSolaris (All rights reserved)
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Oct 20, 2013
Oct 20, 2013 at 5:29 AM UTC
**** Out Sunbathing
Coffee on my breath, wearing a frown. Sunshine, my sweater, my soul turns brown. Lips slick with chapstick, chics' licking sack n' **** drag off a ******* *** n' lean, obscene in the sense, the ******* fags' a drag queen. Rival the bible, hell to sell any, whats worse, church bells smell ugly under my nose. I chose the shallow dirt road to death, even the tallest tales hail the same frail fate. Fill my urn to earn my fill, **** it. There is no still frame to capture the moment, fracture the film and leave it alone. Yellow toned, below me, sallow, cornered in color coordinates. Drenched cover but dry at the core of it; dazzled by **** dazzled by diction, you write the dirtiest fiction and I'm the ******* ***** in it. Leather bound, cable wound, leather bound. Black. Leather.
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Sep 18, 2010
Sep 18, 2010 at 7:30 PM UTC
Queen
A boy in jeans, A boy in trousers, A boy in braces, A boy in blouses, A girl who smells like summer sweat, A girl whose makeup hasn’t set, A boy who swears, A boy who doesn’t, A girl’s shoulder, A second cousin, A girl who smells of **** and beer, A tattooed boy with a silver sneer, A skinny girl who’s got T.B, A boy who daintily sips his tea, A girl’s left leg – bare or stockinged, A boy so cold his knees are knocking, A nasty **** A suede-head killer, Kate Moss, Sienna Miller, Vivienne Westwood’s crazy teeth, Bow-legged loons on Hampstead Heath, Blue eyes, brown eyes, grey eyes, green, Cold eyes, big eyes, sad eyes, mean, Darling sweethearts in flirty skirts, City-Boy ******** in well-pressed shirts, Elbows, throat, wrists, knees, A consumptive girl’s chainsmoking wheeze, Blonde girls with their hair in plaits, Skinny boys, short boys, muscular, fat – Girls with pink lipstick like strawberry frosting, I’m telling you man, It’s ******* exhausting.
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Aug 22, 2014
Aug 22, 2014 at 8:16 PM UTC
things I find attractive
Grab that cigarette and take another drag Listen as the country shouts **** the **** Ain't that a drag Well that ain't my bag Did you see that video that's been circulating? A cool customer got shot down for debating All he did was say Something everyone's been saying This place is crazy And so are we Freedom dies quickly In the land of the free Paranoia's a drug and it's getting contagious I'd like some logic but that'd be outrageous Why'd it take so long to say this? First I had to get famous So grab your lover and rest your head on their chest But first you gotta check if they're the same *** If so, move on to the next Everyone else knows what's best
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May 1, 2016
May 1, 2016 at 11:04 PM UTC
Land of the Free
I can fake a smile. I can pretend that I'm okay .... but I'm only in denial. My hearts been chained I've been imprisoned by shame.. I'm fine F for forsaken I for insecure N for neurotic and E for EMPTY. A few more **** a couple more beers and I'll be able to ignore my pain till Tomorrow that doesn't change the fact that I'm Hollow. Caught between empty sheets I lie awake and think of a way so I can drown in your tranquil eyes.. The grass will never be greener my heartstrings tug at a brighter tomorrow. A few more lonely nights a couple more mind numbing days and I just might live to see the light without its enemy, sorrow. Tears run down my cheek today my dear but I'll never blame maybe tomorrow I'll learn to live without the pain.... Caught between empty sheets the monsters inside my mind will surely haunt me ,the more the better all I have to do is understand your honest letter...
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Oct 6, 2013
Oct 6, 2013 at 11:56 AM UTC
Caught between empty sheets
Charge forth into Dis-topi Ah, City of Kanye-esque antics and Oxford commas looking for lovers Bliss-ful dive and conquer in Shakespearean soliloquies thus Learned to romance on the breast of Juliet and *** ******** despite plaque Toe the line, Lady Macbeth, let your murderous rhythm sing harmonic Matthew 18 rendition on the dias of Gatsby, 1920 Thousand and fifteen we still age inappropriate Lee, Spike jump rage against God Hates **** yet black lives live without crack ******* Kublai Khan to the sanctified Amazons.
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Mar 4, 2015
Mar 4, 2015 at 9:49 AM UTC
Ceramic Virginity
Barefooted teenager Sliding D&G; watches Into a bag filled with Addidas shoes. It's bonfire night in the cities Of England. Come out, children, To the heart of the city and Bleed it dry. Betray your hunger, The greed that consumes you And the indifference bred into Your marrow. Bred by despair and shiny Baubles in window displays And worn by all those Stars in those glossy mags. It's a consumer's world; it's about Instant gratification, not hard work - Even if work could be found. But why work if you can steal? Bonfire night. Like when we burn that Guy. Fawkes? He tried to destroy Parliament But teenage angst and thugs could do in a few nights What his barrels of gunpowder couldn't. Alcohol and **** to last a Short lifetime. Shopkeepers in the way Should know better; You can't fight Irrationality. It has no conscience. ****** loot, burn like in those Movies about war, Grand Theft Auto, And a million other games. Just keep Moving so you never have to actually think. But just in case, let's blame someone else: Let's blame race, the Met, politicians, The schools, the economy, parents -   Society. Burn, London. Burn, Birmingham, Burn, Manchester, Burn Liverpool. Burn, Gloucester. Burn, burn, burn, But let tomorrow be just another day. Bonfire night. Every night. Till they put out the fires, Tend the wounded and Bury the dead.
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Aug 19, 2011
Aug 19, 2011 at 5:55 PM UTC
England is Burning: Bonfire Night
my greatest fear is mother and father reading my journals see through lines deliberately unreadable because i write the unthinkable      'i might not marry someday' and the perverse      *'i wonder what's it like to **** this girl'* and the abominable      *Amber is a woman trapped in the wrong body           and                         she                                  is                                      suffocating.* i choke on the silence because it is woman's role in Saturday sermons because i cannot borrow my brother's slippers      i am not needed outdoors because when i spoke for the trans waiter with the pained smile      they blamed my sociology      and not my compassion mother and father, bless your souls i'd rather not have you read this and believe in the 'i love you's                                because love is the greatest commandment                                                *but we spit on the ****
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Jun 4, 2014
Jun 4, 2014 at 12:57 PM UTC
Love is the greatest commandment.
Cakes & Ale I woke up in a bakery they do start early, the aroma of bread is wonderful, they were also making cakes whipping creams. Napoleon cakes and Danish pastry, black forest gateau and other pastries I have as a child looking through the windows of bakery shops admired. Too much, I walked outside and lit a *** inhaled deeply and the tobacco soothed my mind, giving me a feeling of fullness. It was only then I remembered I have diabetes, a heart problem and have not smoked for 15 years. Has it been worth it this forgoing of the good thing in life; I’m not sure, it may extend my life for a few more years of pain and misery, will I die regretting the cakes I didn’t eat and the **** I didn’t smoke?
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Jun 5, 2015
Jun 5, 2015 at 4:09 PM UTC
Cakes & Ale
I heard my eight year old cousin call his sister a ****** because she is bisexual. I heard the voice of an angel whisper *Daddy says **** go to hell.* That poor boy's mind has been poisoned since birth. He has been fed line after line of over-analyzed, misunderstood scripture and he believes it is his ticket into heaven. I can't wrap my head around why homosexuals would go to hell but the ones flicking Satan's tongue at them are saved. Love doesn't send you to hell. Hate does.
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Mar 24, 2014
Mar 24, 2014 at 10:47 PM UTC
Love Thy Neighbour
Cakes & Ale I woke up in a bakery they do start early, the aroma of bread is wonderful, they were also making cakes, whipping creams. Napoleon cakes and Danish pastry, black forest gateau and other pastries I have as a child looking through the windows of a bakery shops admired. Too much, I walked outside and lit a *** inhaled deeply and the tobacco soothed my mind, giving me a feeling of fullness. It was only then I remembered I have diabetes, a heart problem and have not smoked for 15 years. Has it been worth it this forgoing of the good thing in life; I’m not sure, it may extend my life for a few more years of pain and misery, will I die regretting the cakes I didn’t eat and the **** I didn’t smoke?
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Jun 13, 2015
Jun 13, 2015 at 3:04 AM UTC
cakes and ale
Somebody put Kylie Minogue on from the wall mounted touchscreen one-pound-a-go jukebox- Coldplay would've been better, but I should be so lucky- and the rising water in the Titanic's engine room of noise rose to a First Class stateroom chatter and Kate Winslet and the queue to the bar grew a little longer and then you walked in like a Sunday morning walk, one long stroll by a river edge or lake side, through a Westfield, Bluewater Meadowhall in one long rehearsed map move entrance dodging standing drinkers and their plus ones in Zara trench coats and Boden shawls, and you left a wake of wet forest and crumbling beachhead afternoons behind you as you walked on through the crowd to the pool table at the back where you watched *** after *** after pint after *** after we need more one pound coins to play more pool, and you went out for **** though you don't smoke yourself and you looked up into the mist because you're the kind that would find New York Stuart Little big: mostly building, building, building, window, balcony, bridge, statue and Central Park trees, and you walked back in with river eyes, your lids moving from cold back to behind-the-fridge, pub-room warm and they watered a little, Pacific blue sliding over eternal black; I think she's the kind that needs a lion tamer not an orchestra leader, but I've only got Petit Filous muscles and I had four raw eggs this morning and I'm still not as strong as I’d like to be, (put the baton down, Tim) a River Phoenix younger Harrison Ford stasis, one train wreck ride to remember, nowhere near the lion tamer you need. Kylie sings for the fifteenth time in a row, and the bar is past last orders though cash is pushed under for pints and you disappeared under bar light and then into the moonlight and now I'm sat grieving the Golden Retriever of The Nutshell in Bury St Edmunds this evening.
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May 1, 2015
May 1, 2015 at 12:26 PM UTC
YOGURT FOR A HEART
Somebody put Kylie Minogue on from the wall mounted touchscreen one-pound-a-go jukebox- Coldplay would've been better, but I should be so lucky- and the rising water in the Titanic's engine room of noise rose to a First Class stateroom chatter and Kate Winslet and the queue to the bar grew a little longer and then you walked in like a Sunday morning walk, one long stroll by a river edge or lake side, through a Westfield, Bluewater Meadowhall in one long rehearsed map move entrance dodging standing drinkers and their plus ones in Zara trench coats and Boden shawls, and you left a wake of wet forest and crumbling beachhead afternoons behind you as you walked on through the crowd to the pool table at the back where you watched *** after *** after pint after *** after we need more one pound coins to play more pool, and you went out for **** though you don't smoke yourself and you looked up into the mist because you're the kind that would find New York Stuart Little big: mostly building, building, building, window, balcony, bridge, statue and Central Park trees, and you walked back in with river eyes, your lids moving from cold back to behind-the-fridge, pub-room warm and they watered a little, Pacific blue sliding over eternal black; I think she's the kind that needs a lion tamer not an orchestra leader, but I've only got Petit Filous muscles and I had four raw eggs this morning and I'm still not as strong as I’d like to be, (put the baton down, Tim) a River Phoenix younger Harrison Ford stasis, one train wreck ride to remember, nowhere near the lion tamer you need. Kylie sings for the fifteenth time in a row, and the bar is past last orders though cash is pushed under for pints and you disappeared under bar light and then into the moonlight and now I'm sat grieving the Golden Retriever of The Nutshell in Bury St Edmunds this evening.
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From the backbroken fliers over oceans From between the spiny frills along palm fronds From Mr. Happy, the chain smoking chaperone of good times From Mr. Happy’s half-burnt **** coiled in the ashtray From the disciples of Theravada and the skinny Buddha’s pupilless eyes scanning jocose scansions of jungle From the tanned holy heads of students lounging in graveled football fields From my bowl of rice at breakfast in the shade while considering western cities, you are not here ‘You are not here,’ I’ve written in my letters ‘You are not here,’ I’ve typed into e-mails immense You are not here, my coke head pals locked in the veins of seedy nightmares You are not here, my penniless friends who mix music in ascetic dark rooms out in Bushwick You are not here in no eastern Central Park running naked in the night from horseback cops after hours of merciless balling in the bushes You are not here you fair-skinned beauties in crowded alpine funiculars bearing your aquiline noses holding your hats over the mountains You are not here my lonely mother waiting by the phone for a call at midnight You are not here, you are not in my poems, you are not in the distorted notes harpsichorded across my crass imagination You are not here, you will not be here, will you read my letters home?
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Oct 11, 2010
Oct 11, 2010 at 6:58 AM UTC
Letters Home
You say you act for God, when we see you holding your signs 'God Bless 9/11' 'God hates Fags' I honestly cannot comprehend that you think you're doing good. You, are the people who, make me lose my faith, in humanity. You give us one Hell of a bad name. You better start to fear us, because if I had it my way, Your life would be sustained on pain. I would treasure every scream, and cherish every cut.
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Apr 17, 2013
Apr 17, 2013 at 2:13 PM UTC
****** torture, pleasure.
Having filled my personality on beer, **** art and awkwardness my lungs hung heavy and my morals were slightly isolated as I briefly considered the most direct root to this girl with the ******* and the possibility to access which I knew would be quite the test, as I was by far the worst dressed with my ripped up jeans and hair a mess. So I finally let these thoughts digress, a decision that I know was best. For you should not test the strength of my testosterone, It should always be firmly placed right back at home. But it was at this moment where I noticed the difference between state and private school boys. I was outside smoking the smallest, smuttiest rolled up cigarette When a boy with a name like ‘Monty’ walked past holding a cigar the size of a jumbo jet, The feelings I felt, both hate and detest, As he waltzed right up to the girl with the ******* and muttered a charm under his breath. So with a drunken heart, I went to order a ***** straight and smart. But the bar was closed, and my song was sung, so with my head well hung and ego stung, I left the kings and queens of that party, to fulfil their dreams. As I fulfilled mine with a river gardens Chinese, the finest cuisine.
0
Feb 7, 2010
Feb 7, 2010 at 7:15 AM UTC
A terrible night out being saved by a takeaway.
I thought the cold air would help But there's only ******* smoke Free **** I'm living the dream of a million burnt out lungs with capillaries astray - Sadness is a comfort Happiness burns against my eyelids It sears against the grey - Age doesn't matter as long as you pay Head high to keep the nausea at bay; Visions blur, thought the alcohol in my backpack somehow took effect it was just the ******* smoke.
0
Dec 23, 2015
Dec 23, 2015 at 3:19 AM UTC
Beijing, China