Is violence
the intention
and action
to harm other people?

Is the target of violence
joyful and happy?
Ask someone who's been robbed at knifepoint?
Ask a wife who’s being bashed by her husband?
Ask a child who’s being beaten-up by a bully?

Is the doer of violence
joyful and happy?
Ask a person barking toxic speech?
Ask a mother who’s beating her child?
Ask a robber confined in prison for many years?

I made mistakes
Then people call me fake

I do things to make them happy
In the end they'll laugh behind my back

They call me many things
But, there's one thing that keeps ringing

I am a nobody
Just an invisible person

As we pass in the corridor
You say it. I have
Heard it a hundred times before
So now I implore
What the **** do
I keep taking this **** for?

Once I called you a friend
Now all I want to see
Is you labelled a fiend
For the world to see
So now I implore
What the **** do
I keep taking this **** for?

Every night I go home
Work on things you
Will never understand as
You focus on making others miserable
So now I implore
What the **** do
I keep taking this **** for?

I open my drawer at night
See my gun and think
How nice it would be
To end it all
So now I implore
What the **** do
I keep taking this **** for?

Whoever said to give up
had already gave up

Whoever said to stop
they never knew the word 'go'

Whoever said don't cry
don't know a broken heart

Whoever said your broken
is only repeating what they are

Whoever said you should die
has never climbed a step to live

"What you did to me is unheard of. Unspeakable. You are repulsive. Goodbye."
I can't deal with you no more.
You were my best friend.
Called me a b** and h and so, so much more.
At this point,
if you don't know those two words,
then you haven't been in this sort of situation.
He was my best friend.
My best friend.
It's still burned in the back of my mind.

Surprising,
isn't it,
when the person you trust the most
doesn't just bail,
but hurts you.
The person you loved the most
makes you stay up crying in bed.
The person you loved the most
makes you feel afraid of going to school
or unlocking your phone.

At this point,
I have given up.
My real friends are my old friends,
the ones everyone thought I would dump forever.
But, they always lurked in the background
of my life.
They may have been shoved to the side,
but never did they fade.

These are the friends that were by your side
through the hardest times.
Before you meet the one friend you
get crazy close with in one night and
pretend
trust grows on trees,
think about your old friends.
The ones you might be mad at for a stupid,
stupid reason.
Give them a chance.

Don't let the others fade,
just because you found a new "them."

You've replaced them.
But, the replacement will fail to serve.

Dripping black
Crying eyes
A dark spirit that never dies

She takes in sharp breathes
Watches her steps
And covers her bleeding, torn arms

The blade is ******
The scars are deep
Along with the sadness that lies beneath

Her tears are black
She cries in class
Nobody looks or even asks

To be alone
To be afraid
To be yourself and rejected anyway

To be emo

Told my feelings were fake
Laughed at for crying
Brutalized for refusing
Depicted as anomalous
This is my "home"

I exploded, caught a breath as I felt the silencing

Crossed volatile environments
Misunderstood ephemeral friends
Bullied, ostracized
Experienced injustice
This is school

I performed, in the illusion of shutting silencing

Living my curiosity
Knowledge is my strength
Reflexivity makes me grow
Embracing my difference
This is my refuge

I introspected, in the freedom of their paralyzed silencing

Meet mind-like people
Discovered my emotions
Explored my preferences
Dug my family history
This is my travel

I free-fell, as in my trust I hit structural silencing

Communicating humbly
Nourishing healthy relationships
Trusting my positions
Affirming my autonomy
This is my womanhood

Becoming a mother, I urge to gather the pieces for her freedom

behind the castle walls,
behold a girl who's been hurt,
a girl who's been taunted,
a girl who's been broken into pieces,
a girl who's been tossed aside like nothing,
a girl who's been torn down.

behind the castle walls,
lays a ******* her mattress,
eyes trimmed with water,
as her gaze is fixated on her ceiling.

behind the castle walls,
is a girl who doesn't understand love,
because she's numb to the feeling,
something that stings but no longer pains.

behind the castle walls,
is a girl who's tired,
both emotionally and physically.

behind the castle walls,
is a girl who doesn't want to breathe any longer.
because even the shallowest breath,
burns like flames.

"Nerd!"
"Loser!"
"You ****!"
"Go **** yourself!"

I hear the taunts.
I hear the laughter.
I hear the snickering.

They shove me.
They slap me.
They spit on me.
They chase me everywhere.

I am a ticking time bomb.

And someday
before too long
When they least expect it...
I will go off.

It may be brutal,
It may be ******,
It may be vicious.

But it's the only way
I can save myself.

There are no other options.

My past is too much of an influence on my present,
I know it's a problem.

But all I have ever been taught is
To be a joke, because thats all I am
To be silent, because nobody really cares
To never ask for help, because I'd just be judged
To never say no, Because I'd get punished.

And all I've ever been told is
I'm not beautiful
I'm not fitting their standards
I'm not going to be loved

so thank you, step father
Thankyou for destroying everything I was.


© Copyright Tyler Atherton