in my writing anyone can tell i'm a fraud
just a painter trying their hand at a new form
composition swapped for sentence structure,
verses on pages where watercolors on canvases once laid

in your writing i can tell you're a fraud
you put words into your mouth, hope people believe them yours when they spill out
a performative emotional ventriloquist waiting for applause

i used to think writers romanticize and painters show,
after all you were my frame of reference when it came to poetry
but I’ve since learned you’re just not truly a writer

I put down the pencil and picked up the ink
and hey i'm not half bad but you’re not half good
i tried to speak your language not realizing you didn’t know it either
kept handing you words you could rewrite into warnings

come to think of it you never tried to speak mine,
never tried to translate me, never grabbed charcoal
and maybe it's for the better,
you would have smudged it around to cover up who i am
you mime meaning and call it understanding,
i was wrong in mistaking your performance for presence
maybe you being a **** writer wasn't all bad,  if it kept me from the monster you actually believed i am
maybe you being a **** writer is why i too fell in love with the version of me you crafted, she’s a little less ruined

the more i look back the more things i notice, more things to write about
like how your poems were never directed at me,
i was not the audience you were pandering too because you knew you already had me hooked,
no, instead you wrote to another public,
I was a character in your songs you could show off, let people pick and ****
made me into a myth, a tale parents tell their kids to scare them into sleep
you were my muse and the person i was trying to reach with my strokes
not realizing there was no heart to reach for

so i write now and you still don't paint,
if you did i think you’d be bad at it anyway
you’d hate cubism, seeing more than one perspective seems to fracture your mind
and you’d find a way to romanticize it all, put reality aside
you never were good at taking things at face value,
even worse at translating and encompassing things bigger than you
I was the stars but knowing you, you’d just paint a blank black sky, add your own galaxies to and call it a piece worth while

either way i still write, usually about you, always directed at you
i find new words and try to rewrite the story you told,
but if i ever show the public I’ll be sure to make it an illustrated book with all the imagery i know you can't paint

the ghost of my devotion stood on trial for you,
role of lawyer in place of victim taken in stride, in strife
i stood by your side fighting for your name while you tore mine down in exchange

i pleaded to the court not realizing the judge and jury had my face
self defense, i claimed
pointed to the scratch on your chest i had left
the one from trying to reach for your heart,
the one for which a bandaid would have been enough

i remember marking you first, remember feeling criminal for it
brazed for life sentence, but still kept gauze ready to treat it like a bleeding artery
there was so much blood in my hands i mistook for yours
drips down my wrists dry and forgotten, blood i recognize now as my own
i hurt you and you killed me, made it look like my own doing

all is fair in love and war. was my excuse
i think they’re one, the way they wound, inevitably

my argument fell apart when the accusant lawyer came forth with the autopsy and sad eyes strikingly like my own
blunt force trauma, mismatched gashes and cuts
post mortem wounds, bruising all over
what you did to the body, after the fact, that was irredeemable
your cruelty kicked and punched, a trail of evidence of hatred undeniably left behind

He picked up the fruit, mistook the shine for something familiar
Thought the crimson red meant safety
a comfort food he remembered from childhood

Hungry and eager, tongue sliding over lips
he popped it into his mouth
biting down hard
expecting raspberries’ familiar flood

But the sound of something breaking met him instead
A tooth chipped on the cherry pit
It was a cherry after all

Starvation had blurred his sight
He thought I was soft, sweetness of an old friend
But I was never raspberries
He just never looked long enough to know

The illusion shattered in his mouth
iron taste instead of tartness
He spat it out, blood and juices mingling
bone and pit, both broken, indistinguishable now

He walked away, changed but not beyond repair
red-stained hands already reaching for another low-hanging fruit
too desperate to clean before, too desperate to care,
too starved to seek fruit he might like more
The cherry lay behind, torn and spent
pit smashed, flesh split wide

In time, the earth will cover it
The water will nurture what remains
Years will pass, roots will sprout
The cherry blossom will rise strong again
And in the branches
more cherries will grow
sweeter than they ever were before

I was handed fists
for as long as I can remember.
My curiosity—squashed with screams.
I didn’t learn the alphabet—
it was beaten into my ribs.

I didn’t hold hands.
But their grip was tight enough
to remind me I’d never leave.
I’ve been property since conception,
just signed over with a new lease.

My tears were never wiped—
they were smacked off my face. You must swallow all emotion or you're a disgrace.

I was to speak when spoken to and never out of turn. What happens at home stays at home and no one else should learn.

It wasn't a phase mom- daughters marry men like their dads. Though I came pre-etched in rules there was a new ruler to be had.

I was handed fists,
my whole life,
disguised as loving encouragement
to be better.

How was I to know you don't have to yell to show passion?

You put on your glassy mask
So I'll only see
The version of yourself
You contrived for me.

You slip on your suffocating shoes
So you can walk on
Like you're not gasping for air,
And nothing is wrong.

You tie up your hair tightly
So you can pretend
You're that pretty little girl again
With those once loyal friends.

You slide up your dejected glasses
So I can't see your bleeding scars
Hiding behind the facade—
I don't know who you really are.

Does a thick woman ever feel her patience wearing thin, while
her man wears a beard, ready to take her every mood by the chin?
He’s dating a girl named Erin, who hates it when he cuts his hair,
and runs errands. She made him ink a tattoo on his neck, declaring,
“property of Erin’s,” then she decided to shave her head, but she's
now wearing a wig— a real bold choice. While her man is plagued
by countless voices, but he himself, doesn’t have much of a voice.

She swiftly cleans up her act for the public eye – she's a minute maid,
with a juicy figure that could turn any man to pulp; and she’s also
self-made. And he’s like an empire of ants, bearing more than his
own weight. But he’s not much of a saint, his mischief thrives when
she’s far away, and it can never wait. He keeps a side piece as a
thought to chew on, always clearing off his plate.

They picture a relationship, but lack the means to truly relate –
just a ship; claiming they’re on the same boat; being each other’s
bait. “Plenty of fish in the sea,” but they leave hooks in one another,
after they hook up. Never pausing to Google for their worth; it’s right
there, just look up– to the writing on the wall. "We’re all crumbling
on each other"; if these walls could speak. As countless feet trample
on each other’s toes, in these crowded streets of Love, we seek.

Paved in toxicity – a toxic city, where toxic lovers inhale toxic fumes.
Easily fuming when being called out; the headlines of these daily
romances, all spell bad news.

You have damaged me very badly
Ensuring that I hate you madly
You have caused me a lot of emotional trauma
By being a queen of sheer drama
You pretended to love me as a friend
Instead, did you trap me in a toxic bond!

You have damaged me very badly
Because, you were only after my money
You are much worse than an enemy
Because, never did you truly want me to be happy
You have caused my self-esteem to crash
For that, you, should God punish!!

You have damaged me very badly
And may be thinking coolly
That you are now going to have a great life
But I warn you, you are going to be in strife
You will get divorced soon
And find yourself alone
Ignored by almost everyone
Finally, will you know then
What it means, to be betrayed
By someone you dearly trusted
Well, now I totally hate you
But I will eventually forgive you
Only because of my love for Jesus
And then I will finally find my inner peace
But you will never find yours
Goodbye and good riddance!!

People warned me,

turned against me,

said I was a fool.



Yet you I trusted

but now that's busted.

Still my love overrules



And I don't wanna ****

something so divine.

Who knew I could have

so much love inside?

Even through all the suffering,

for you I’d still give anything.



You’ve turned my care into a curse,

my offer of aid into a disgrace.

You're always messing with my mind,

sabotaged all I tried to rebuild.



Now I lie in bed alone

clinging to all you left me.

I still look for your attention

and I have cried so much

over your wandering affection,

over how I miss your touch.

Tell me how can I move on

when I’ve loved you so wholly?



But I don't wanna ****

something so divine.

Highly doubt I could

even if I tried.

I’ve held on so tightly

though it’d suffocate me.

But even through all the suffering,

for you I would do anything.

I promised you I would always stay,
swore on a bond I thought would never break.
Then there came a time everything conflict
but I meant every word, every bit of it.
I can still remember myself say
That I’m with you, all the way.

I held on so tightly, refusing to let go,
my heart cracking wildly with every push-pull.
I found myself drowning in all that I know,
but I’m not one for giving up. No, I stay faithful...
I do everything that I can to lift you up.
I give anything without ever planning to stop.

And then for a moment, when I’m left alone with my dreams,
a voice pipes up asking, what about these?
And what about
me?

I march and stagger onward, far under the stars
Carrying the weight of two broken, battered relationships
and a big heavy heart that’s covered with scars.
Who ever knew it would come to this?

Vengeful memories haunt me in the night
And I pray all this pain and suffering will finally subside,
Yet for you I’ll still stand strong.
Even worn out, I’ll keep holding on.
Yes I’ll BURN alight
in hopes of winning your fight.

Why do you do this?  
Twist my choices until they vanish,  
your words, soft but cruel, carving into my flesh,  
each one deeper, more suffocating than the last.  
You blackmail me with your pain,  
threats hanging like nooses,
slowly tightening around my neck.  
You said you’d end everything,  
if I didn’t surrender to your darkness.  
Do you even see me,  
not as your shattered reflection,  
but as someone slowly being erased,  
drowning in a life I can’t escape?  
I know you're sinking,  
but why drag me down with you,  
burying me beneath your weight?  
I need you to hear me—  
to release me before I’m lost entirely,  
because if you can’t,  
I’ll break, and you’ll have killed me too.