the moment of surprise,
hold of breath,
wandering eyes,
cloudy skies,
crowded place,
elevated space,
racing heart,
i'm fallen apart,
tight grip on your colar,
don't be so bipolar,
red lipstick kisses,
heartbroken pieces,
messy hair,
we are the perfect pair,
only when you leave me,
you will see,
why we were so reckless,
young and careless,
fooling around,
misbehaving without a sound,
our hearts wound,
unfixable,
dismissable.

I come from darkness
And such as a moth
Beating itself
To death
Against a flame,
In your arms, I burn
Just the same.


F.Z.N

I'm craving your initials in trees and writing your name on notebooks.
My heart thumps and thumps and thumps and sometimes I think it's only because of you- you're so out of my league and I'm so ******* sad all the time because my heart is beating for you but I bet I don't even cross your mind.
I hate being the one who loves more, or the one who loves at all. I'm tired of giving my everything away to people who don't even care- but you, God, I can't keep myself from giving it all to you. I can help but hope one day you'll want me and it's killing me, but I'm not walking away; I rather die close to you than far.

Glub **** **** glub
glub thumb,
Breathing is quick
**** Glub
Smile
**** Glug
Look away
Then look back
A subtle smirk
**** glub
glug thumb
Goes my beating heart

Beer in hand
Drinking my pains away
In front of me my child stands
"Get out of my sight, go and play"

The wife arrives home
Tears in her eyes
"Someone just throw this ***** a bone"
Turn up the volume, drown out the cries

"Turn that **** down" she yells
Sick of this crap
In my head like loud bells
Beat this ***** with my belt strap

She curls in the corner alone
I resume watching my show
My son mutters in a low tone
I raise my hand for the blow

He stares into my eyes
I see a glassy mirror
My heart falls and inside I die
I'm a ****** monster, a terror

Tears fall down my cheek
My young boy is a reflection of me
What will this cause him to seek
This is not what he should see

As the diamonds fall over his dimples
He asks me "is me and mummy a burden?"
Down my face tears still trickle
Speechless deep inside I'm hurting

"No my boy, daddy is a rotten man"
"I still love you daddy, just
please don't hit mummy again"
Choking up my chest begins to bust

My son is a bigger man than his father
I wish I could right my wrongs
But to protect my son and his mother
I tremble walking deaths songs

I'm not good for either
Before I enter the gates of hell
"Son, please take care of your mother"
This is the end my life I expel.