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"professionalism" poems
I notice the tiny pulse of frustration in the back of his neck I notice the way that he sighs and slumps over I notice how his elbows splay out so his face bobs lightly over his desk A buoy dancing over a wave I notice the way he glances at his friends before he answers I notice the way he shapes his mouth into a grin before he speaks I notice how his eyes squint a little when he laughs I notice how they dull when he doesn’t want to listen I notice how his shoulders hunch when refuses to hear I notice the boredom in the lines of his back as he considers I notice the way his leg jiggles as he bounces his foot lightly The ever-present dichotomy of professionalism fighting immaturity Of a thirst to learn, fighting against ignorance, justice calling I notice this inner battle of boyish nonchalance and masculine defensiveness I notice how his eyes dart lightly over his chosen comrades before he writes again I notice the way he presses his forehead into his hand As though he could pull ideas out And read his thoughts printed back on his palm I notice the consistent rubbing against his face with his fingers Phalanges to stimulate the thought process I notice the hesitation before his pen scratches the page Piercing the paper with words he must call his own I notice the claim of responsibility and the toll it takes on his physique I notice the fatigue of struggling to create To feel, to create, to feel, to feel I notice, throughout all the time I’ve been noticing him He has not noticed me once
0
Oct 24, 2014
Oct 24, 2014 at 3:30 PM UTC
On the Cremation of My Classmate
I notice the tiny pulse of frustration in the back of his neck I notice the way that he sighs and slumps over I notice how his elbows splay out so his face bobs lightly over his desk A buoy dancing over a wave I notice the way he glances at his friends before he answers I notice the way he shapes his mouth into a grin before he speaks I notice how his eyes squint a little when he laughs I notice how they dull when he doesn’t want to listen I notice how his shoulders hunch when refuses to hear I notice the boredom in the lines of his back as he considers I notice the way his leg jiggles as he bounces his foot lightly The ever-present dichotomy of professionalism fighting immaturity Of a thirst to learn, fighting against ignorance, justice calling I notice this inner battle of boyish nonchalance and masculine defensiveness I notice how his eyes dart lightly over his chosen comrades before he writes again I notice the way he presses his forehead into his hand As though he could pull ideas out And read his thoughts printed back on his palm I notice the consistent rubbing against his face with his fingers Phalanges to stimulate the thought process I notice the hesitation before his pen scratches the page Piercing the paper with words he must call his own I notice the claim of responsibility and the toll it takes on his physique I notice the fatigue of struggling to create To feel, to create, to feel, to feel I notice, throughout all the time I’ve been noticing him He has not noticed me once
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27
If you grasp tight to your                          individualism, Give in to all the                       romanticism, Rid of any          materialism, Confide within                    professionalism, Drop all acts of                     favoritism, Eject from any              vulgarism, Open up to            socialism, Advocate          activism, Realize you are an                           organism, Forget about any                      perfectionism, And explore inside                          transcendentalism, You will look up into complete mesmerism of how all the stars are symbolism for the billion versions of creationism that you've ever lived, and will live.
0
Sep 13, 2011
Sep 13, 2011 at 8:57 PM UTC
Untitled
Conflict resolution is like a field of mines where shrapnel explodes and uncertain footings pervade their way through the flesh of our workplace relationships. Professionalism has crossed invisible boundaries beyond the realms of Saturn, don’t you think? Please, will you consider having political interactions on the territory upon which I reside? You will then truly understand the mechanics of being. I can correct you. But you must be willing. Come on, babe! I dare you to venture outside of the box of predictability, because we can then truly arrive at a mutual understanding.
0
Feb 21, 2014
Feb 21, 2014 at 9:16 PM UTC
Interpersonal Dynamics
In the face of persecution, one can drift away into dreamy fabrications of swishing and gorgeous hairstyles – jealous of the seagull as it dismounts the lofty perch of the streetlight and gracefully swoops away into the distance. The moment of self-loathing and raging sabotage is nothing more than a serial false loyalty. I validate your alphabet where there is simplicity within the intricate complexities, and where the yearling suckles the lactations of its mother. Trauma has pre-natal connections where silent screams ripple throughout eternity. Therefore, calmly observe the stiff upper lip of deluded professionalism, and describe the realistic mirage before you. Participation in laughter is not always rooted in sincerity.
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Nov 7, 2013
Nov 7, 2013 at 10:40 PM UTC
Painful Comedy
Remember how I'd smoke after school outside your classroom window watching you pack up your briefcase, pulling your arms through your blazer sleeves? Four cigarettes in a ring between my thumb and fingertips, an "okay" sign. You preferred jean dresses with the hips cut out, knee-high fishnet socks, my hair wrapped curiously in bandana red with my eyes outlined in black. I stole condoms and Twinkies, brought them to your apartment after you'd call to unwrap me like penny candy on the mattress in the middle of your floor, each tear in synch with the teeth of your zipper releasing. A green wrapper and an empty trash can next to my book bag. You licked your fingers after the last bite.
0
Mar 8, 2014
Mar 8, 2014 at 9:58 PM UTC
Professionalism
And so this story goes forever Being held to the ground for being clever I don't know what these ******* even teach you But you can't stand for yourself (it's true) The world emanates the fear of our souls Expressing what we feel disrupts their goal Stricken to the bone, we tear our flesh To show our opinion in a scarring mesh They make us cover it all or be removed For professionalism is dictated by what they approve Hold your head high while you ******* can Bills are passed to begin the eternal ban Stripped of our freedoms Naked and exposed To invasion of comfort and artistry I say **** you And **** them too For they have nothing to say against our cries of injustice They know what they do is an expression of narcous
0
Dec 25, 2013
Dec 25, 2013 at 11:30 PM UTC
Henna Tattoos Make A Lesser Man Weak
The view outside, looking in, fills you with envy. The feeling living it, working in, fills you with strange uncertainty. You heard of the stories, the hand-me-down rumours. You thought you were prepared, ready to take on the world in your armour. You get a taste of the flavours of the world, yet drowned by the spices of your own. It's not the world you're afraid of, it's your own that wouldn't condone. You know you wouldn't let it pin you down, it's only as long as it last. You'll walk out there,dressed with pride and all that happened will surpass. The world may make you feel small,from time to time but the world wouldn't break you. You take on the world with much professionalism and you'll eventually grow away from new. You'll constantly have your spices of surprises, every time you wait in that room. But these spices can only make you stronger, remember, those girls you saw dressed with pride and well groomed. You wanted that pride, to walk with that honour. Your feet's in that shoe now, go, and take on the spices and the world.
0
Nov 15, 2011
Nov 15, 2011 at 12:41 PM UTC
Hierarchy
I couldn't believe the pathetic look you were giving me, As if I was the one who needed saving. Let me profess once and for all that I do not want your pity. Once and for all, that you never realized what I needed from you. Friends, He shrugged at me when the fiery arrows came, And he kept my secrets, but only when I was present. Friends, I gave him my utmost devotion and he dismissed it for the bat of pretty eyelashes Friends! He abandoned the sacredness of friendship For the sake of professionalism. It's "unprofessional" to care for someone Who sacrificed everything for you.
0
Aug 23, 2014
Aug 23, 2014 at 7:29 PM UTC
Professionalism
The Corp, even life itself, is a test. The Corp, life, a test of humanity, a test of values, ethics and morals. The Corp, life, a test to learn, a test to live, results to apply. Pass the test, receive your reward, your honor, your pride and professionalism, your character. Take what you learn, Experience, ... ... share. ( Dedicated to Mr Thomas Forbes. A great friend, a co-worker and former Marine, ... Semper Fi ) 1/15/2008, ... FAM © 2/20/2013
0
Jan 8, 2012
Jan 8, 2012 at 1:14 AM UTC
THE TEST
for Nave Busyness makes one idiotic and forgetful. And we nearly sunk the night didn’t we darling, leaning on the wrong swing. (It is always the peach tree.) Katrina doing her Harpy on Fullblast thing with such deftness and professionalism she leaves us no room to respond to legs and offers of spread cheese. And poets cave in like lonely black holes if they cannot response as fully as they have peaches in their coffers to do so, or at least they think so and so do we so I escaped to shower, and tried to make the water hot enough to round me straight again, but my skin still gets in the way. I wanted to peel off everything and douse my soul straight in the hot and the lavender, questing for a readiness beyond the pale, some state rare, and infinitely usuable. It was only when, and this is true, when I decided to make a list of why I love you that the water went in and the lavender grew instantly between my toes. And Rosemarey Clooney danced you in to me and you were a happy Papa at last, and we knew enough. And there was finally room enough to mambo home.
0
Jan 14, 2012
Jan 14, 2012 at 7:07 AM UTC
Last Ditch Mambo
i'd like to say that poetry could be my profession but that would be like saying that spewing my emotions and dark thoughts across the shelves of a bookstore is a profession. i could never make someone clean that up. (and still face them again)
0
Dec 21, 2014
Dec 21, 2014 at 6:33 PM UTC
professionalism
Work Ethic Work requires professionalism, at all times in all set of conditions. let an earned knowledge and skills, an asset to be utilized as maximal. no regrets even if reward is scare, go ahead do it for the love of work. People around need not to be told, everyone knows who perform well. real professional does not brag, seldom claims for recognition. open-minded to a paradigm shift, never pessimistic but often optimistic at anything of value and substance. let others rationalize to find reasons, act on the issues with sound mind no jesting around just do things right.
0
Jan 11, 2018
Jan 11, 2018 at 3:53 AM UTC
Work Ethic
Is this in reality ….. Has all it’s lost its ways! Or it just a bucks of cents And all your sense taken away! So, I cry for the lost… And for those I learned to love…. What a world of ¬ Professionalism Taken out of the blues!
0
May 28, 2016
May 28, 2016 at 9:34 AM UTC
“Professionalism Out of the Blues”
Timothy the poet, With words that speak professionalism That I envy His diverse His sense The words that flow from him And the happiness that seems to spring off the page And force itself down my throat Until a smile cracks my lips And my teeth show white Because Timothy Your poetry brings me joy.
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Jul 12, 2013
Jul 12, 2013 at 2:01 AM UTC
Inspired Bright
Although I too have forgotten my lines today's celluloid seems to be shedding its script the raw talent confers a lack of oomph. Only my projection screen follows perfection. I'm caught in a nitrate web, with partaken beauty firing my basement dreams, onward choices amongst Colleen Moore and Blanche Sweet testifies professionalism spoke eloquently without words
0
Nov 3, 2012
Nov 3, 2012 at 12:34 PM UTC
Silent Screens
Control A dysfunctional mechanism But held by robots Emotionless Is classified as "professionalism" Justice And relentless prejudice Two words in synchronicity That enforce the "Law" But do help enforce corruption Corrosion Oxidising parts The very oxygen that we breathe Helps to end our heart Water Our oft-polluted oil Helps keeps parts running smoothly With which we argue and spoil Errors The reason we **** each other And **** ourselves simply by living Tell me, would you **** a close brother? Perfectionism An impossible goal computed into the code of humanity It's impossible to obtain, So stop trying and give up Accept your flaws
0
Aug 4, 2016
Aug 4, 2016 at 12:50 AM UTC
We Are Machine
Erasure & Found Poem from "On Photography By Teju Cole in april 16th new york times magazine -- You were The fast moving disaster of a tsunami added to the slow motion disaster of a nuclear calamity Towns flooded Infrastructure wrecked Forests splintered more than 15,000 people dead. earthquake cut off my external power supply Floodwaters damaged my backup generators Disabled it's cooling system Overheating ensued Fuel in three reactor cores melted Releasing radiation Everyone saw The water coming in The roads swept away Towns and harbors destroyed Extensive documentary work was undertaken by photographers Of the ruins, Debris, Cleanup and relief operations The gut-wrentching scale of destruction The professionalism of the emergency crews The fortitude of the survivers The extreme uncertainty I feel in our current political moment helps me understand for the first time the curious twinship of mourning and premonition. Information about the tragedy Sorrow for the suffering it caused Gratitude for the work that makes sorrow visible Foreboding about the future. An alert flashes your phone Something terrible has happened Far away, a flood, an airstrike, Soon, there's footage of people picking through wreckage what used to be their homes It is easy to pity them Difficult to imagine this will be you Suddenly bereft of a solid place in the world. Listening to anything that touches on the sublime makes me apprehensive. Like The silence that greets us waking in the middle of the night
0
Apr 17, 2017
Apr 17, 2017 at 12:57 AM UTC
Erasure & Found Poem from "On Photography By Teju Cole in april 16th new york times magazine
Erasure & Found Poem from "On Photography By Teju Cole in april 16th new york times magazine -- You were The fast moving disaster of a tsunami added to the slow motion disaster of a nuclear calamity Towns flooded Infrastructure wrecked Forests splintered more than 15,000 people dead. earthquake cut off my external power supply Floodwaters damaged my backup generators Disabled it's cooling system Overheating ensued Fuel in three reactor cores melted Releasing radiation Everyone saw The water coming in The roads swept away Towns and harbors destroyed Extensive documentary work was undertaken by photographers Of the ruins, Debris, Cleanup and relief operations The gut-wrentching scale of destruction The professionalism of the emergency crews The fortitude of the survivers The extreme uncertainty I feel in our current political moment helps me understand for the first time the curious twinship of mourning and premonition. Information about the tragedy Sorrow for the suffering it caused Gratitude for the work that makes sorrow visible Foreboding about the future. An alert flashes your phone Something terrible has happened Far away, a flood, an airstrike, Soon, there's footage of people picking through wreckage what used to be their homes It is easy to pity them Difficult to imagine this will be you Suddenly bereft of a solid place in the world. Listening to anything that touches on the sublime makes me apprehensive. Like The silence that greets us waking in the middle of the night
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53
Professionalism Intelectualism Institutionalism say they, Yet I see a dishonesty; a self with-held reality. A cloak of convenience to cover the frame of fragility, infancy. Hostility, I shall avoid and thus comply In this little white lie called policy.
0
Oct 29, 2014
Oct 29, 2014 at 9:45 PM UTC
Same ole Song and Dance
I have sat for many hours Opening my soul to you Listening with my heart To your wisdom, wishing you were my mom Now you are gone And I am alone again The pain is still hurting But I can no longer listen to your voice I didn’t want you to go I wanted to be your child Although I understand You needed to retire to find a new life The children inside my mind Weep for you every day I sit alone in my room And allow their despair to wash over me After all the years Of telling you my heart I can no longer reach out to you And that hurts me to the core of my being You could die And I would never know I could die And you would not care when or why I wish I could see You just one more time To tell you how I hurt But I know you would never allow that You told me once I would not owe you anything When we parted company That I would be free to go my own way Now that it you’ve gone I must forward without you I must remember what you taught me But my soul is pain and so **** confused You were the mother I never had It is like you’ve died I’ll never see you or hear your wisdom again I know I can say All these things Because you will not know I would never impose upon your professionalism I just wish Oh God I wish You were my real mom Then you wouldn’t be out of reach forever I have one more thing I would like to say Before I end this poem I love you Paula, and I miss you very much
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Nov 2, 2017
Nov 2, 2017 at 7:10 AM UTC
Last Words to My Therapist
Something from past Something of which still remains in the present Somewhere in the past, something got clicked Something positive happened Something went right Something for sure, definitely something Its’ auspicious presence can still be felt in the present. It’s always your action that speaks for itself Action speaks louder than words It’s not only your confidence, but also your faith in your work It’s not only your attitude, but your trust in others It’s not only about your professionalism, but also your expertise It’s not all about you, but all about the way in which you work It’s always your work, your deeds, something which always gets highlighted Time and again, always Your deeds, your qualities, not only in your work, but also in your life speak for what you are It's your deeds and qualities in you as a person that make you stand apart from the rest. Time and again it has been proved that you reap what you sow Your deeds from the past since they are righteous they will support you all along the way Your righteous deeds will always show you where is light in the dark. It’s always better to be what you are Does not matter even if you do small thing All that matters is your actions must be positive Not only in your thoughts, but also in your attitude, you must also be positive Speak positively Always do good instead of thinking negatively Live your life on your own terms Live life according to what you know, what you think and then plan your future accordingly. Life is beautiful Life has always remained beauitful Life will always give you something, if you approach towards it in a positive way.
0
Oct 25, 2015
Oct 25, 2015 at 9:53 PM UTC
It's My Life
Something from past Something of which still remains in the present Somewhere in the past, something got clicked Something positive happened Something went right Something for sure, definitely something Its’ auspicious presence can still be felt in the present. It’s always your action that speaks for itself Action speaks louder than words It’s not only your confidence, but also your faith in your work It’s not only your attitude, but your trust in others It’s not only about your professionalism, but also your expertise It’s not all about you, but all about the way in which you work It’s always your work, your deeds, something which always gets highlighted Time and again, always Your deeds, your qualities, not only in your work, but also in your life speak for what you are It's your deeds and qualities in you as a person that make you stand apart from the rest. Time and again it has been proved that you reap what you sow Your deeds from the past since they are righteous they will support you all along the way Your righteous deeds will always show you where is light in the dark. It’s always better to be what you are Does not matter even if you do small thing All that matters is your actions must be positive Not only in your thoughts, but also in your attitude, you must also be positive Speak positively Always do good instead of thinking negatively Live your life on your own terms Live life according to what you know, what you think and then plan your future accordingly. Life is beautiful Life has always remained beauitful Life will always give you something, if you approach towards it in a positive way.
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31
* *It is in my fall is your rise It is in my dark is your light It is in my lows is your high It is in my small is your BIG It is in my loss is your gain It is in my night is your day It is in my humiliation is your appreciation It is in my descent is your rise It is in my poverty is your wealth It is in my begging is your charity It is in my moon is your sun It is in my clouds is your rain It is in my internal is your eternal It is in my stagnation is your flow It is in my desert is your ocean It is in my decrease is your increase It is in my small is your large It is in my hungry is your eating It is in my cry is your laughter It is in my absent is your presence It is in my sleep is your dreamZ It is in my heat is your cool It is in my fire is your water It is in my dusk is your dawn It is in my blame is your forgiveness It is in my sufferings is your help It is in my last is your first It is in my few is your many It is in my slow is your fast It is in my vulnerability is your empowerment It is in my victim-hood is your assertiveness It is in my earth is your sky it is in my idiocy is your smartness It is in my minus is your plus It is in my foolishness is your cleverness It is in my heart is your mind It is in my despair is your hope It is in my evening is your morning It is in my end is your beginning It is in my shrinkage is your expanse It is in my silence is your talks It is in my prisons is your freedom It is in my solitude is your wander It is in my unknown is your famous It is in my sinking is your floating It is in my ignorance is your education It is in my demotion is your promotion It is in my trivial is your importance It is in my injustice is your justice It is in my indignity is your human rights It is in my leaving is my staying It is in my being lonely is your friendships It is in my sadness is your merry It is in my dive is your soar It is in my crawl is your flight In is in my valley is your mountains It is in my exploitation is your sustainability It is in my rebel is your loyal duty It is in my defeat is your success It is in my scarce is your abundance It is in my failure is your achievement It is in my rejection is your acceptance It is in my dislike - there is your adoration It is in my retreat is your advancement It is in my "against" the world is your "for" the world It is in my dead is your alive It is in my NO ONE is your everyone It is my amateurishness is your professionalism It is in my leaving is your arrival It is in my slumber is your awakening It is in my ugliness is your beauty It is in my end is your beginning It is in my end-note is your prelude It is in my worst is your BEST It is in my death is your birth It is in my bitter is your sweet It is in my blame is your praise It is in cursing me is your blessing It is in my timidness is your bold It is in my being weak is your strength It is my being at bottom is your being at top It is in my idleness is your busyness It is in my tears is your smiles It is in my captivity is your LIBERTY It is in my sad is your cheer It is in my child is your adulthood It is in my innocence is your maturity It is in my adolescent is your aging It is in my gulp of helplessness is your courage It is in my spark is your lightning It is in my destruction is your creativity And over and above all what is said and written It is LOVEz understanding and realization of YOURS That WE are two bodies and ONE SOUL OUR togetherness makes us YIN-YANG It is in my veins is your blood It is in my pulse is your breathe It is in my womb is your cosmos It is in my heart is your soul It is in my LOVING you is YOU LOVING yourself It is in my LOVERz is your BELOVEDz It is in ME is YOU is me* *
0
Oct 11, 2019
Oct 11, 2019 at 10:21 PM UTC
It is in my.... Is YOUR....
* *It is in my fall is your rise It is in my dark is your light It is in my lows is your high It is in my small is your BIG It is in my loss is your gain It is in my night is your day It is in my humiliation is your appreciation It is in my descent is your rise It is in my poverty is your wealth It is in my begging is your charity It is in my moon is your sun It is in my clouds is your rain It is in my internal is your eternal It is in my stagnation is your flow It is in my desert is your ocean It is in my decrease is your increase It is in my small is your large It is in my hungry is your eating It is in my cry is your laughter It is in my absent is your presence It is in my sleep is your dreamZ It is in my heat is your cool It is in my fire is your water It is in my dusk is your dawn It is in my blame is your forgiveness It is in my sufferings is your help It is in my last is your first It is in my few is your many It is in my slow is your fast It is in my vulnerability is your empowerment It is in my victim-hood is your assertiveness It is in my earth is your sky it is in my idiocy is your smartness It is in my minus is your plus It is in my foolishness is your cleverness It is in my heart is your mind It is in my despair is your hope It is in my evening is your morning It is in my end is your beginning It is in my shrinkage is your expanse It is in my silence is your talks It is in my prisons is your freedom It is in my solitude is your wander It is in my unknown is your famous It is in my sinking is your floating It is in my ignorance is your education It is in my demotion is your promotion It is in my trivial is your importance It is in my injustice is your justice It is in my indignity is your human rights It is in my leaving is my staying It is in my being lonely is your friendships It is in my sadness is your merry It is in my dive is your soar It is in my crawl is your flight In is in my valley is your mountains It is in my exploitation is your sustainability It is in my rebel is your loyal duty It is in my defeat is your success It is in my scarce is your abundance It is in my failure is your achievement It is in my rejection is your acceptance It is in my dislike - there is your adoration It is in my retreat is your advancement It is in my "against" the world is your "for" the world It is in my dead is your alive It is in my NO ONE is your everyone It is my amateurishness is your professionalism It is in my leaving is your arrival It is in my slumber is your awakening It is in my ugliness is your beauty It is in my end is your beginning It is in my end-note is your prelude It is in my worst is your BEST It is in my death is your birth It is in my bitter is your sweet It is in my blame is your praise It is in cursing me is your blessing It is in my timidness is your bold It is in my being weak is your strength It is my being at bottom is your being at top It is in my idleness is your busyness It is in my tears is your smiles It is in my captivity is your LIBERTY It is in my sad is your cheer It is in my child is your adulthood It is in my innocence is your maturity It is in my adolescent is your aging It is in my gulp of helplessness is your courage It is in my spark is your lightning It is in my destruction is your creativity And over and above all what is said and written It is LOVEz understanding and realization of YOURS That WE are two bodies and ONE SOUL OUR togetherness makes us YIN-YANG It is in my veins is your blood It is in my pulse is your breathe It is in my womb is your cosmos It is in my heart is your soul It is in my LOVING you is YOU LOVING yourself It is in my LOVERz is your BELOVEDz It is in ME is YOU is me* *
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104
I couldn't give a **** what heat engines are. My job is to tell a couple little snot noses to sit their ***** down and drink juice - it's easy and I love it. I couldn't give a **** about heat engines. (I mean, aren't all engines hot anyway?) But when I watch you kneeling in front of a whiteboard, drawing out diagrams for your coworker about what you're learning in physics, my heart jumps out of my ******* throat and slaps my computer screen like a raw steak. Not exactly a romantic metaphor I know, but it's accurate. I never thought Expo pens could be **** I never thought math could be **** for ***** sake. But you do it somehow. Everything about you drives me nuts. Looking at you gives me the biggest feelings I've ever felt, and I get scared I'm going to explode. Really. People say stuff like that, but it's true - it feels like I'm going to explode like some sort of adorable grenade. I don't know what to do with myself. Ever. Go to church - yeah. Get my degree - sure. Go to work - totally. But with myself? I have no ******* clue. For one, I don't think I can come hang out with you at work anymore. You have a certain amount of professionalism to maintain, and I am a threat to that - in the most violently affectionate way possible. I am so close to tackling you in a bear hug and spooning you right here in this classroom. I never considered how painful it is to love somebody. In the best ways and the worst ways. Now you're sitting in the armchair next to me, the ****** little coffee maker filling the air between us. You talk with your friends and draw and type into your calculator and occasionally glance at me and every time you do anything, I . . . I can't. I can't even explain how it feels. You are the antidote and the virus to every part of me. Loving you has been the most exhilarating and most miserable experience of my life. Loving you has taught me how agony can be sweet. Loving you has changed my life and will continue to change my life. I've lost interest in almost everything. School is school, work is work, books have become boring and friends have become obsolete. You feel the same way, and your Mom thinks you're depressed, but you're not. Neither of us are. We're so ready. We're so ready for something new. I have never stared at someone so shamelessly in all my life. I could listen to you talk about heat engines for the rest of my life. That's the plan, anyway.
0
Feb 22, 2016
Feb 22, 2016 at 6:58 PM UTC
Heat Engines
I couldn't give a **** what heat engines are. My job is to tell a couple little snot noses to sit their ***** down and drink juice - it's easy and I love it. I couldn't give a **** about heat engines. (I mean, aren't all engines hot anyway?) But when I watch you kneeling in front of a whiteboard, drawing out diagrams for your coworker about what you're learning in physics, my heart jumps out of my ******* throat and slaps my computer screen like a raw steak. Not exactly a romantic metaphor I know, but it's accurate. I never thought Expo pens could be **** I never thought math could be **** for ***** sake. But you do it somehow. Everything about you drives me nuts. Looking at you gives me the biggest feelings I've ever felt, and I get scared I'm going to explode. Really. People say stuff like that, but it's true - it feels like I'm going to explode like some sort of adorable grenade. I don't know what to do with myself. Ever. Go to church - yeah. Get my degree - sure. Go to work - totally. But with myself? I have no ******* clue. For one, I don't think I can come hang out with you at work anymore. You have a certain amount of professionalism to maintain, and I am a threat to that - in the most violently affectionate way possible. I am so close to tackling you in a bear hug and spooning you right here in this classroom. I never considered how painful it is to love somebody. In the best ways and the worst ways. Now you're sitting in the armchair next to me, the ****** little coffee maker filling the air between us. You talk with your friends and draw and type into your calculator and occasionally glance at me and every time you do anything, I . . . I can't. I can't even explain how it feels. You are the antidote and the virus to every part of me. Loving you has been the most exhilarating and most miserable experience of my life. Loving you has taught me how agony can be sweet. Loving you has changed my life and will continue to change my life. I've lost interest in almost everything. School is school, work is work, books have become boring and friends have become obsolete. You feel the same way, and your Mom thinks you're depressed, but you're not. Neither of us are. We're so ready. We're so ready for something new. I have never stared at someone so shamelessly in all my life. I could listen to you talk about heat engines for the rest of my life. That's the plan, anyway.
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16