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"impartial" poems
and i don't even know if i want to kiss your lips or just your skin because i'm      falling        falling          falling            falling          falling        falling      falling but i don't want to hit the ground again. are you sure your arms can hold the weight of my love when it's wrapped in wet clothes? and are you sure it's the best idea to take this where the wind goes? i'm not yet sure if love is a real thing it's just a    beautiful   fictional deadly play, and you still kiss me like i'm sane but i know it's all just another game so don't be surprised if i refuse to participate. and you're like a          cynical            patronizing              inconsiderate            impartial          callous song, but your vicious words still gently drag me along. and i'm not sure if you're really toxic or it's just all in my head. because i love you love you ove you ve you e you you ou u or maybe i love when you're in my bed.
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May 14, 2018
May 14, 2018 at 10:56 PM UTC
not sure if i should love you or f*ck you
(for Christopher Isherwood) Seated after breakfast In this white-tiled cabin Arabs call the House where Everybody goes, Even melancholics Raise a cheer to Mrs. Nature for the primal Pleasure She bestows. *** is but a dream to Seventy-and-over, But a joy proposed un- -til we start to shave: Mouth-delight depends on Virtue in the cook, but This She guarantees from Cradle unto grave. Lifted off the ***** Infants from their mothers Hear their first impartial Words of worldly praise: Hence, to start the morning With a satisfactory Dump is a good omen All our adult days. Revelation came to Luther in a privy (Crosswords have been solved there) Rodin was no fool When he cast his Thinker, Cogitating deeply, Crouched in the position Of a man at stool. All the arts derive from This ur-act of making, Private to the artist: Makers' lives are spent Striving in their chosen Medium to produce a De-narcissus-ized en- During excrement. Freud did not invent the Constipated miser: Banks have letter boxes Built in their façade Marked For Night Deposits, Stocks are firm or liquid, Currencies of nations Either soft or hard. Global Mother, keep our Bowels of compassion Open through our lifetime, Purge our minds as well: Grant us a king ending, Not a second childhood, Petulant, weak-sphinctered, In a cheap hotel. Keep us in our station: When we get pound-notish, When we seem about to Take up Higher Thought, Send us some deflating Image like the pained ex- -pression on a Major Prophet taken short. (Orthodoxy ought to Bless our modern plumbing: Swift and St. Augustine Lived in centuries When a stench of sewage Made a strong debating Point for Manichees.) Mind and Body run on Different timetables: Not until our morning Visit here can we Leave the dead concerns of Yesterday behind us, Face with all our courage What is now to be.
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The Geography of the House
(for Christopher Isherwood) Seated after breakfast In this white-tiled cabin Arabs call the House where Everybody goes, Even melancholics Raise a cheer to Mrs. Nature for the primal Pleasure She bestows. *** is but a dream to Seventy-and-over, But a joy proposed un- -til we start to shave: Mouth-delight depends on Virtue in the cook, but This She guarantees from Cradle unto grave. Lifted off the ***** Infants from their mothers Hear their first impartial Words of worldly praise: Hence, to start the morning With a satisfactory Dump is a good omen All our adult days. Revelation came to Luther in a privy (Crosswords have been solved there) Rodin was no fool When he cast his Thinker, Cogitating deeply, Crouched in the position Of a man at stool. All the arts derive from This ur-act of making, Private to the artist: Makers' lives are spent Striving in their chosen Medium to produce a De-narcissus-ized en- During excrement. Freud did not invent the Constipated miser: Banks have letter boxes Built in their façade Marked For Night Deposits, Stocks are firm or liquid, Currencies of nations Either soft or hard. Global Mother, keep our Bowels of compassion Open through our lifetime, Purge our minds as well: Grant us a king ending, Not a second childhood, Petulant, weak-sphinctered, In a cheap hotel. Keep us in our station: When we get pound-notish, When we seem about to Take up Higher Thought, Send us some deflating Image like the pained ex- -pression on a Major Prophet taken short. (Orthodoxy ought to Bless our modern plumbing: Swift and St. Augustine Lived in centuries When a stench of sewage Made a strong debating Point for Manichees.) Mind and Body run on Different timetables: Not until our morning Visit here can we Leave the dead concerns of Yesterday behind us, Face with all our courage What is now to be.
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80
Time is venerable and impartial. It has no need for desire or emotion, yet what it encompasses does. Time seems unfair and uncaring, but it has purpose. To see what you really care about.
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Oct 12, 2014
Oct 12, 2014 at 1:31 PM UTC
Time
I am blind And I ain't blind To the different social classes And their faces I try and try to be impartial But my fears and preconceptions Give way to prejudice of thought Love and unity fill my mind Yet when its time To effect some change My feet quiver And words can't formulate I want to tell my brethren you are special to me and I love you just the same As anybody else But I'm scared of what he will respond Will he reject me as we are not the same Will he embrace me and bring forth a seed of change I am blind And I ain't blind To the disdain classes afford one another Man threatens to discard the fact we're all the same So I wonder Can we look beyond facades Strip it all down to our core Don't we all want to feel the same Maybe we can toughen up and take down the ranks That impede us from becoming one-another's friend
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Dec 3, 2010
Dec 3, 2010 at 2:57 AM UTC
Beyond Social Classes
At this particular time I have no one Particular person to grieve for, though there must Be many, many unknown ones going to dust Slowly, not remembered for what they have done Or left undone. For these, then, I will grieve Being impartial, unable to deceive. How they lived, or died, is quite unknown, And, by that fact gives my grief purity-- An important person quite apart from me Or one obscure who drifted down alone. Both or all I remember, have a place. For these I never encountered face to face. Sentiment will creep in. I cast it out Wishing to give these classical repose, No epitaph, no poppy and no rose From me, and certainly no wish to learn about The way they lived or died. In earth or fire They are gone. Simply because they were human, I admire.
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5k
In Memory of Anyone Unknown to Me
A handy Mole who plied no shovel To excavate his vaulted hovel, While hard at work met in mid-furrow An Earthworm boring out his burrow. Our Mole had dined and must grow thinner Before he gulped a second dinner, And on no other terms cared he To meet a worm of low degree. The Mole turned on his blindest eye Passing that base mechanic by; The Worm entrenched in actual blindness Ignored or kindness or unkindness; Each wrought his own exclusive tunnel To reach his own exclusive funnel. A plough its flawless track pursuing Involved them in one common ruin. Where now the mine and countermine, The dined-on and the one to dine? The impartial ploughshare of extinction Annulled them all without distinction.
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A Handy Mole
☺☻╬☻ Finish the crackers --- grab a smoke . . . of Ferguson my muse will sing. A call to arms --- God’s fires to stoke; let Truth and Freedom ring! Take to the streets; avenge this wrong and hasten the end of racist rule. Justice, though it may tarry long will find its target in the duel. Young Michael Brown, like all true saints found himself craving Swisher Sweets. He robbed a store, whose camera paints impartial portrait. In the streets the thief refused to be detained and so threw off police restraint. Though sin escaped, the Law remained and made a martyr of this saint. The agitators did their thing: inflaming thugs to smash and loot, while racists baited hooks, to string the press. Officials followed suit. Angels, although not always kind, do not display this attitude – aware of how the police mind responds to such ingratitude. We ought to thank the police force for showing mercy under stress. The culprit chose a foolish course and made a God-awful mess. Prince Michael met ignoble fate (that ghetto-Christ, that righteous youth) His sacrifice in vain --- though great, could not impede the march of Truth. Ferguson, our eyes turn towards you . . . are you now able to admit while reality rewards you that looting and lying ain’t ****
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Sep 11, 2015
Sep 11, 2015 at 5:43 PM UTC
Hands Up, Ferguson
the catholic nurse all sensitive caring noticing everything what can she think of my hot/cold torment always near blowing it living in the fast lane so friendly kind the girls dewy eyed wanda abandoned me bolton is in my hands and yet my coldness hurts the more emotional they stay trying to find a reason for my ice-like suspicion fish eyes coldly indifferent eyes suspect everything that moves socialising just to be loud compensate for cold lack of essential trust warmth i love them despite myself my desire to love is unconscious and gigantesque i never know when i'm going to miss someone strange coldness perplexing i've got to work to get devotion but once i get it i really get people on my side there are my people who can survive my shark-like coldness and there are those who want something more personal i can be very devoted to those who can stay the course my soul is aching for an impartial love of people i'm at war with myself.
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Aug 20, 2015
Aug 20, 2015 at 4:21 AM UTC
Strange Coldness Perplexing
Travelling royalty, a princess with no home; Inspiring love and loyalty, everywhere she goes. A radiant smile, captivating eyes, Flagrant beauty, the kind that never dies. A lover of life, an enchanting presence, An overflowing fountain, wonderful decadence. The princess met the peasant – A man from a land where very little is pleasant. Clawed a path out of the dirt, Flawed, yet always hungry for answers, An explanation as to why we’re all scarred and hurt. Temptation incarnate, freedom given life – Impartial, a storm about to deliver strife. It was a spark worthy of Zeus’ thunderbolts; Worlds apart, yet tolerant of each other’s faults. Equals in their intellect, conjoined at their hearts; Immediate and mutual respect, Together, they could make the seas part. The peasant got blessed by the divine, The princess was impressed by the sublime. Her, with her presence, Him, with his essence – Two people who, despite their charms, don’t fit anywhere else. They found shelter in each other’s arms, A respite from their personal hells. Yet, the princess needed to journey once more, An ending to a story that leaves the heart sore. The peasant lay there, looking at his fields, Reminiscing, bitterly sipping comfort in a glass. He could do naught but shed tears, and think: ‘I’d give up every harvest, all my work and what it yields, To have you by my side; you gave me peace and strength, You made me feel like I can bend swords and crack shields.’ The princess could only stare, Right at where his hand once held hers; She could only think of the dare, The night where they both let down their hair, And think: ‘I’d give up the road, all my walks and journeys, To have you by my side; you gave me sweetness and kindness, You made me feel loved, breathless and weak in the knees.’
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Oct 23, 2018
Oct 23, 2018 at 1:02 AM UTC
The Princess & the Peasant
Travelling royalty, a princess with no home; Inspiring love and loyalty, everywhere she goes. A radiant smile, captivating eyes, Flagrant beauty, the kind that never dies. A lover of life, an enchanting presence, An overflowing fountain, wonderful decadence. The princess met the peasant – A man from a land where very little is pleasant. Clawed a path out of the dirt, Flawed, yet always hungry for answers, An explanation as to why we’re all scarred and hurt. Temptation incarnate, freedom given life – Impartial, a storm about to deliver strife. It was a spark worthy of Zeus’ thunderbolts; Worlds apart, yet tolerant of each other’s faults. Equals in their intellect, conjoined at their hearts; Immediate and mutual respect, Together, they could make the seas part. The peasant got blessed by the divine, The princess was impressed by the sublime. Her, with her presence, Him, with his essence – Two people who, despite their charms, don’t fit anywhere else. They found shelter in each other’s arms, A respite from their personal hells. Yet, the princess needed to journey once more, An ending to a story that leaves the heart sore. The peasant lay there, looking at his fields, Reminiscing, bitterly sipping comfort in a glass. He could do naught but shed tears, and think: ‘I’d give up every harvest, all my work and what it yields, To have you by my side; you gave me peace and strength, You made me feel like I can bend swords and crack shields.’ The princess could only stare, Right at where his hand once held hers; She could only think of the dare, The night where they both let down their hair, And think: ‘I’d give up the road, all my walks and journeys, To have you by my side; you gave me sweetness and kindness, You made me feel loved, breathless and weak in the knees.’
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He who is loyal to a particular one is a slave to discrimination. He who is loyal to both is ripped in two. He who is loyal to neither is impartial and safe, a king of his own.
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Jul 24, 2014
Jul 24, 2014 at 6:39 PM UTC
Certain Loyalty
since before I was born I can remember time picking me up and carrying me along in its embrace it held me close never letting me down never stopping along the way sometimes speeding up sometimes slowing down freezing in slow motion moments it has never let me down running on through these presents here Passing here past time's arrow only moving in one direction no instant replays no do overs leaving traces of memories some false some recovered some discovered left with the traces of remorse and guilt in pain to tend along our way time my sweetest friend and enemy of endings I have always thought a lot these days these ways these happy unhappy joyful passing passing moments with you I held on tight to your impartial embrace knowing full well one day on the ground you will lay me down
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Mar 1, 2015
Mar 1, 2015 at 3:02 PM UTC
Time
I knew you from another time, another country, watched you flicker between the shrill squeals of children's voices, trace crystal on reflective faces. Long forgotten, you followed me here to dance your brittle death over my body's contours, startling me into submissive white. My skin shudders. Your cold hands surprise me, long bones flecked with almost-snow shrivel my seed to a dry husk, my fruit to rotten pulp. You are alien here. Like a thief you fling back my golden quilt, steal the colour from my cheeks, reduce my indigenous offspring to a spineless slaver of translucent gel, terrified milk running to ground. After of a night of white terror you sigh over me, roll your eyes over my corpse leaving the whole withered, impartial to my wailing on account of your ungovernable nature. copyright © Caroline Grace 2012
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Mar 23, 2012
Mar 23, 2012 at 10:10 AM UTC
Night Stalker.
Every blade of grass Fed by rays from space Each color refracted An afternoon complete With swing set Barefoot strolling Impartial recognition Nihilism’s shadow Hides seeds supplanting thistle Frail beginnings Awkward stems Reaching for our earth And a life left behind Leaching nourishment Acknowledged By their voices But glances are more telling Lonely wanderer, Man imbued Disparate hopes Discouraged and disheartened As the sun shines down His blades reflect Refracted radioactivity Thistled leaves snapping Thorny twigs grasping At our earth At our voices At anything Our serendipity
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May 14, 2010
May 14, 2010 at 7:50 PM UTC
Mittertag
“It is essential in order to protect societyfrom the ambition, greed, and malpractice or caprice of rulers to ensure the inviolatibility of even the humblest home.  The right and power of the private citizen to appear to impartial courts against rulings of the state and against ministerial decrees of the day.  Freedom of speech in writing, freedom of the press, freedom of combination and agitation within the limits of long established laws.  The right of regular opposition to government.  The power to turn out a government and put another set of men in its place by lawful and constitutional means, and finally the sense of every individual’s association with the state and of some responsibility with the actions and conduct of the state.”
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Apr 28, 2015
Apr 28, 2015 at 1:13 PM UTC
Churchill Expresses Why Dictators Shouldn't Be Welcome In Britain
Two armies face, Under wild and impartial skies. Tension, drawn and nocked, Waiting for the order to loose. The drummers beat cadence, Tempo building Matching my racing pulse. Clarion call, Drowning out all thought. Ground quaking, With the pounding Of hundreds of feet. Battlecries and wordless screams Split the air. Alike to the one Rising in my own throat.
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Aug 11, 2010
Aug 11, 2010 at 8:55 PM UTC
A Glorious Charge
Indifference is beautiful It does not judge It does not care It simply is. My beautiful, unbiased and impartial whore I love you
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Mar 13, 2014
Mar 13, 2014 at 8:00 PM UTC
Indifference
I have seen God. Her head raised high, poised and beautiful Smooth skin that seems to control nature in her veins. In her was history, the first, the genesis. Her love is impartial, incomparable. I have seen God In different shades of earth and nature Made of Protons, neutrons, melanin She is root; the source of life Life itself, the very beginning. I have seen God She would trade her life for her children She’s an armour and life jacket She is the source of life and peace. She is more than an angel, she is a god. I have seen God She is black.
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Mar 29, 2018
Mar 29, 2018 at 8:48 AM UTC
I have seen God
I will be patient I will be kind I will gain My peace of mind I will not judge I will not cheat I will live A life complete I will be happy I will be serene I will keep a heart So pure, so clean I will accomplish I will strive I will persevere I will thrive I will be impartial To all mankind I will gain My peace of mind
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Jan 7, 2015
Jan 7, 2015 at 3:38 AM UTC
Vows to Live By.
Hail, happy saint, on thine immortal throne, Possest of glory, life, and bliss unknown; We hear no more the music of thy tongue, Thy wonted auditories cease to throng. Thy sermons in unequall’d accents flow’d, And ev’ry ***** with devotion glow’d; Thou didst in strains of eloquence refin’d Inflame the heart, and captivate the mind. Unhappy we the setting sun deplore, So glorious once, but ah! it shines no more. Behold the prophet in his tow’ring flight! He leaves the earth for heav’n’s unmeasur’d height, And worlds unknown receive him from our sight. There Whitefield wings with rapid course his way, And sails to Zion through vast seas of day. Thy pray’rs, great saint, and thine incessant cries Have pierc’d the ***** of thy native skies. Thou moon hast seen, and all the stars of light, How he has wrestled with his God by night. He pray’d that grace in ev’ry heart might dwell, He long’d to see America excell; He charg’d its youth that ev’ry grace divine Should with full lustre in their conduct shine; That Saviour, which his soul did first receive, The greatest gift that ev’n a God can give, He freely offer’d to the num’rous throng, That on his lips with list’ning pleasure hung. “Take him, ye wretched, for your only good, “Take him ye starving sinners, for your food; “Ye thirsty, come to this life-giving stream, “Ye preachers, take him for your joyful theme; “Take him my dear Americans, he said, “Be your complaints on his kind ***** laid: “Take him, ye Africans, he longs for you, “Impartial Saviour is his title due: “Wash’d in the fountain of redeeming blood, “You shall be sons, and kings, and priests to God.” Great Countess, we Americans revere Thy name, and mingle in thy grief sincere; New England deeply feels, the Orphans mourn, Their more than father will no more return. But, though arrested by the hand of death, Whitefield no more exerts his lab’ring breath, Yet let us view him in th’ eternal skies, Let ev’ry heart to this bright vision rise; While the tomb safe retains its sacred trust, Till life divine re-animates his dust.
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2.1k
On The Death Of The Rev. Mr. George Whitefield
Hail, happy saint, on thine immortal throne, Possest of glory, life, and bliss unknown; We hear no more the music of thy tongue, Thy wonted auditories cease to throng. Thy sermons in unequall’d accents flow’d, And ev’ry ***** with devotion glow’d; Thou didst in strains of eloquence refin’d Inflame the heart, and captivate the mind. Unhappy we the setting sun deplore, So glorious once, but ah! it shines no more. Behold the prophet in his tow’ring flight! He leaves the earth for heav’n’s unmeasur’d height, And worlds unknown receive him from our sight. There Whitefield wings with rapid course his way, And sails to Zion through vast seas of day. Thy pray’rs, great saint, and thine incessant cries Have pierc’d the ***** of thy native skies. Thou moon hast seen, and all the stars of light, How he has wrestled with his God by night. He pray’d that grace in ev’ry heart might dwell, He long’d to see America excell; He charg’d its youth that ev’ry grace divine Should with full lustre in their conduct shine; That Saviour, which his soul did first receive, The greatest gift that ev’n a God can give, He freely offer’d to the num’rous throng, That on his lips with list’ning pleasure hung. “Take him, ye wretched, for your only good, “Take him ye starving sinners, for your food; “Ye thirsty, come to this life-giving stream, “Ye preachers, take him for your joyful theme; “Take him my dear Americans, he said, “Be your complaints on his kind ***** laid: “Take him, ye Africans, he longs for you, “Impartial Saviour is his title due: “Wash’d in the fountain of redeeming blood, “You shall be sons, and kings, and priests to God.” Great Countess, we Americans revere Thy name, and mingle in thy grief sincere; New England deeply feels, the Orphans mourn, Their more than father will no more return. But, though arrested by the hand of death, Whitefield no more exerts his lab’ring breath, Yet let us view him in th’ eternal skies, Let ev’ry heart to this bright vision rise; While the tomb safe retains its sacred trust, Till life divine re-animates his dust.
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The one thing I will never understand, Is man's inhumanity to his fellow man, How people who call each other sister and brother, Could be so hurtful to one and other, How people can treat each other so mean, Without understanding where they've been, Who would lead each other into war, Choosing to be the problem, not the cure, Who have the power to guide another man's fate, With hidden agendas mixed with hate, Who think nothing of causing another man pain, If there is a dollar somehow to gain, Who would send another man off to die, While widows and orphans are left to cry, Though they may play the part of an impartial judge, They'll soon condemn you for some long-held grudge, Stepping into the night like some heartless thief, Their only goal is to bring another man grief, Manipulating others they seek to control, For a bit of power, they'd sell their soul, Yes, the one thing I'll never understand, Is man's inhumanity to his fellow man. 09-23-10.
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Jan 2, 2012
Jan 2, 2012 at 12:31 AM UTC
I'll Never Understand
market report: spinning on an axis of complexity phrase captures and enraptures, buried deep in one of the countless market reports that arrive every minute out of date by the time they press the end/send button but this rises up from the forged gorge throat and all the rest falls away spinning on an axis of complexity sticks like Elmer's glue, white viscous, good for paper & skin, cause you knew precision revision incision instantaneous, they are intended for your eyes only, pasted to your eyes, tinged tongue screaming you man, you poem there is no difference, for both at 1:55am   where time is sleep verboten,   when words are blood platelets in a mystery entitled spinning on an axis of complexity human must eat human must work human must love human must sort the juggling orbs, too much new information constant and brain incapacitated *while falling-spinning when eyes now fully glued shut by the complexity of clashing algorithms writing this market report on the state of me, the passionate impartial analyst who boldly reveals, he proclaims he owns stock in himself and issues a sell recommendation* the complexity-situation trending signals crash a-coming, and at 1:59am after composing this hissy fit writ, he downgrades the official outlook to sell and lies down on the kitchen floor and laughs with the angel dudes eating bagels and holding their sides, cause they have been running a short position up in heaven 6/22/17 2:05am nyc
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Jul 13, 2017
Jul 13, 2017 at 11:01 PM UTC
market report: spinning on an axis of complexity
The prison bus passes this way every now and then, surfacing without warning—a leviathan of metal, grease, and glass its dark windows secured by squares of rusted wire its diesel engine heart spewing exhaust that turns morning rain the color of seawater. The prison bus does not stop for stop signs; red lights are nothing but violent memories strung in an overcast sky. When the bus strikes something in its path the prisoners bounce slightly in their seats, lifted into impartial air liberated momentarily by the familiar co-conspirators of blood and laughter. In his dreams, the guard who drives the prison bus circumnavigates the globe, plowing through clouds of insects that shimmer like fuel above the road.
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Apr 7, 2017
Apr 7, 2017 at 11:02 AM UTC
Plankton
There’s a picture perfect moon in the sky and all I can think about is you (which doesn’t make sense because the moon in the heavens and all the stars in the galaxy have nothing to do with you and I). I think it’s because it was you who I told all my secrets to, you who I confided in—I think it’s because I trusted you. Sometimes I look up at the cosmos and wonder what type of angel she is and then I wonder if I ever told you my deep, dark thoughts about what happened. I can’t remember. My mind is as thick and heavy as my tongue feels— fog everywhere and I cannot see where I am going, much less where I have come from. There’s something inside of me that, like a caged dog, is awaiting to be unlocked from its restraining bars and I don’t know where to start talking without sounding like an absolute madman. I think that this poem has transformed from a few lines about you to a few lines about her and to be honest, I don’t remember the last time I wrote about her (but I guess I should try). I was a child when I first went to bed and a teenager as I turned in my sleep— we could be twins, she and I, with our closed eyes, and visions of stars at night and pale complexions like the sand on the beach basking in the glow of the hanging moon. I wonder if she met Samael. I wonder if he was nice. They told me how much I looked like her; they gushed about how we had the same personality, same sense of humor, but I didn’t want to hear a word they said— I don’t think I could stand to look myself in the mirror if that were true because it would be a constant reminder of her and I don’t want to be reminded. I think that we all start off as angels and that somehow we end up here, bound down to a life full of interactions and paths to cross and plans to make; I think that we all finish as angels and that somehow we end up there, no longer a single form and single being, we become infinite once more. But then I remember that even Lucifer, himself, once wore white wings and I think that sometimes we’re no better than him— that I’m no better than him. I hope Raphael can fix us and I pray that Uriel can set us straight because in this aphotic world, I want to be able to see straight down into into the abyss. I want to see you through unbiased eyes and hear you through impartial ears the way that I used to be able to until that night outside your house. I want to tell you all of these things I think about the two of us— all these things I think about my mother and that night and those days in which it happened. Just please don’t clip my wings.
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Sep 17, 2013
Sep 17, 2013 at 11:57 PM UTC
A Four Year Old Lamentation
There’s a picture perfect moon in the sky and all I can think about is you (which doesn’t make sense because the moon in the heavens and all the stars in the galaxy have nothing to do with you and I). I think it’s because it was you who I told all my secrets to, you who I confided in—I think it’s because I trusted you. Sometimes I look up at the cosmos and wonder what type of angel she is and then I wonder if I ever told you my deep, dark thoughts about what happened. I can’t remember. My mind is as thick and heavy as my tongue feels— fog everywhere and I cannot see where I am going, much less where I have come from. There’s something inside of me that, like a caged dog, is awaiting to be unlocked from its restraining bars and I don’t know where to start talking without sounding like an absolute madman. I think that this poem has transformed from a few lines about you to a few lines about her and to be honest, I don’t remember the last time I wrote about her (but I guess I should try). I was a child when I first went to bed and a teenager as I turned in my sleep— we could be twins, she and I, with our closed eyes, and visions of stars at night and pale complexions like the sand on the beach basking in the glow of the hanging moon. I wonder if she met Samael. I wonder if he was nice. They told me how much I looked like her; they gushed about how we had the same personality, same sense of humor, but I didn’t want to hear a word they said— I don’t think I could stand to look myself in the mirror if that were true because it would be a constant reminder of her and I don’t want to be reminded. I think that we all start off as angels and that somehow we end up here, bound down to a life full of interactions and paths to cross and plans to make; I think that we all finish as angels and that somehow we end up there, no longer a single form and single being, we become infinite once more. But then I remember that even Lucifer, himself, once wore white wings and I think that sometimes we’re no better than him— that I’m no better than him. I hope Raphael can fix us and I pray that Uriel can set us straight because in this aphotic world, I want to be able to see straight down into into the abyss. I want to see you through unbiased eyes and hear you through impartial ears the way that I used to be able to until that night outside your house. I want to tell you all of these things I think about the two of us— all these things I think about my mother and that night and those days in which it happened. Just please don’t clip my wings.
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