Caffeine. Nearing addict status; once spurned pure black but now it’s my composition. Jitters
my thoughts; next round is scotch: Next, I’m alcoholic. Yet, withdrawal never latches. I’m safe.
Two Cinquains. Describes how I overindulge in coffee (I once couldn't stand the taste of black coffee and now I can't get enough of it) and I fear that alcohol will do the same to me (I don't like the taste of it but maybe I'll love it too much like I do coffee). Yet, even with coffee, I can drink heavy amounts of it for days and be completely fine (not experience withdrawal symptoms). So with my anxious thoughts, they seem like they will stick with me forever but in the end, I'll be fine.
Love may be the toughest withdrawal It fertilizes a garden and blooms the wildest—beautiful flowers. It’s flourishes with enough love given to it, as it decays in a catastrophic drought. Nature needs care and its necessities to grow. We grew a garden raising it up from the seed. Withdrawals hit when the desire to revive the flowers and the browning of plant is no longer achievable. No fertilizer. No water. Dry Soil. The wanting to of seeing the flowers bloom again. The wanting of how the garden once looked. The images of what the garden would have looked like. That is the toughest.
All i had to do was reach deep into what I have felt when a certain type of love leaves.
I want to tell you that it's going to be alright. I want to tell you whatever I have to to get you through the night. I want to tell you how proud I am that you asked for help as i hold you tight. No matter how much you scream and cry and shake, I won't give up the fight. I want to tell you that it's not your fault. And as we sit by the fire, watching it fill the room with warmth and light, I want to tell you that it's going to be alright
I’m just an addict I let you become my drug My high, my fix I needed you You wove yourself into my brain You coursed through my veins I just wanted more of you And I knew I’d hit my limit. You made sure I knew But I wanted more
Then you left
You left me broken Weeping Weak and shaking Desperate for just a little bit more Anything to ease the pain Of this withdrawal
You changed me You rewired me You left your essence in my brain And I can’t get you the hell out
You cut me off And I still haven’t decided If that was for my own good Or a cruel necessity to save yourself But I guess all I can do now Is try to get you out of my system
Inspired by “The Drug In Me Is You” by Falling in Reverse
This is going to work I’ll feel better Swapping medications Paroxetine for fluoxetine Sprinkle in some hydroxyzine Just keep swallowing Pill after pill... Idk... maybe one of them will help But now.... my head spins Every time I move I never want to eat Then I gorge myself I can’t remember anything I’m sorry I keep forgetting I just... I’m trying so hard to get better I’m trying. I am. But to get better I must endure illness Withdrawal Side effects Before any of it will improve
Dealing with withdrawal for the first time... trying to switch medications but I just feel sick... I’m taking so much medication....
I often feel an irresistible urge to shake my head, static racing across neurons from chemicals, long gone. Then comes the gnashing, grinding teeth, and the horrible, intrusive thought, that this will never go away. But before the thought finishes forming, the feeling is gone. And I look in the mirror, and think to myself: "What the **** have I done?"