My dad always told me I was useless
At times like this I believe him
Could have stood up for him
Could have pushed the kids who hurt him away
Could have, could have, could have I could but I didn’t
I didn’t because I was scared
Fear is our worst enemy they say
I think fear is our best friend
He stops us from doing things that we shouldn’t
Because if I stood up for him that day
He would not have learned to fight for himself
At least that’s what I say to ease my guilt
The guilt I got after listening to my best friend.
Listening to only what he said

There's no need to remind me.
I already know.
I struggle with this more than
Anyone would know.
Many hours spent thinking and alone.
There's no need to remind me.
I know too well.
My existence is useless.
An absolute waste.
Please, stop reminding me,
I already know.

something in me
stuck the day
you didn't come.
my eyes became machinery;
every sound caught
in my throat
and the silence
followed for weeks.
I smoked 14 cigarettes
in the car;
I burned at the thought
of stillness;
I was vulnerable to light;
I washed my body in the way
you said my name.

now I come
to the sound of leaving.
like the way a symphony sounds
to deaf ears,
I am unafraid of what
you will say to me.
we are different people now;
I am silent
and you are stillness;
we are tangled around
the sadness of each other.

I have been running
in between towns
waiting for your capture;
I am running
hoping to never be found.

I'm a man of the night
I've been branded
My poetry serves no purpose to the world.
I've not been branded a hero,
I've'd seen how those all end:
                    Unquestionable statues of bronze or gold
                  or rather forgotten,
              disposed after 2 weeks of fame after-death.
I want neither.
I'm no hero, no. I'm no gigantic bearded poet
                                         Hemingway shot himself
                                                         ­       I couldn't muster courage
                                         or decandence.

I. made. to.
               Stand.
Shoulder to shoulder.
Serving my servers.
Out of love.
I carry. As they carry.
              as I get. Carried.
As one shelters me this moment;
As other. Eloquent. Frightening. Dashing and Proud.
                 as she said;
                 titles are in fact...

Blue jeans fused to the office chair
One foot tucked under the other knee
Stuck in place watching your dreams

Unfold through a dead eyed stare
Never felt so social, have you?
Have you?

With such strong connection,
Did you figure this condition
Could only get worse?

I've barely used my life
Since I saw proof of yours

I am sick of being silenced
These chains wrapped around my voice won't break
By the time courage has woven around them
The words are lost and I have slipped into an anesthetic languor
I crave the feeling of the fire
But when I want it the flame is extinguished
And when it burns for me the chains snake around my brain and the words become jumbled
I have the fire in my heart and hands
But I no longer have the power to use them

a day of repeat
get up
dress
and question what to eat
procrastinate
feel useless
and watch people succeed on tv

A glance towards the innocent
Only you don't see it that way
You put your hatred into others
to make sure they will obey

Use and misuse the human rights
"Oh Baphomet your wicked ways"
The diversions you desire
The perversions sought on earth

Since dawn of time, your presence
brought men satisfying lies
Lust in the holy ****** her eyes
Baphomet a name full of essence

Praised by those who found you
To provide destruction
Hang the skeptics..