Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
E McNamara Mar 2018
I used to tear myself apart
And bleed blue butterfly wings
To pause my torment.
My life had become pure survival,
On creating something beautiful
Out of a dreadful loneliness.

My life had become a horrific masterpiece.
No one understood- those blue butterfly wings,
Kept me alive.
I used to tear myself apart.
Slice, to release my anguish.
But a constant, it always was-

Lingering, waiting,
For the blue butterfly wings to vanish.
For me to rip myself apart.
Again, and again, and again.
At times it seemed
My suffering never ended.

These days are different,
For when those blue butterfly wings
Bleed out my skin,
They never mature to red    I devour them
To have lasting serenity.
Anguish will not ruin me again.

Because,
I used to tear myself apart.
This poem is describing how it felt to cut while I was depressed. I cut to take out my anger and sadness on myself. It ruined me and "helped" me at the same time. Again, any feedback would be appreciated :)
Pagan Paul Mar 2018
.

I capture an image
as you flitter
through my dreams,
never resting to say hello,
never staying long enough
for me to enjoy
or appreciate your visits,
your mist like touch
as St Vitus Dance drives
you fidgeting
amongst my inner thoughts,
no care for the damage caused
nor the trails
of scented confusion,
yet wraith-like or feral ghost
your imprint leaves
traces of perfumed attention
in a tortured mind,
that linger with a hope
of a fleeting glance,
replaced with a second look,
and the tender torment
persists in the clinging grip
of pictures
sequenced to evade notice.



© Pagan Paul (05/03/18)
.
Ella Mar 2018
Can I agree with you again?
Can I trust you, in letting you in again?

This should be all solved, right?
I just want to have a normal and happy life again

I want to wake up in the morning and not think about what happened last week
I want to have my motivation back
I want to be able to look you in the eyes and not doubt you again

Will everything go back?
Will this really work out?

Should I have just moved on?
Should I have just blocked you out of my life entirely?

I decided not to
I decided to live on and face the reality
I didn't just want to loose you, I didn't want to loose myself
Here is a terrible poem, I don't have inspiration right now and I had a lot of things to worry about in my life so I hadn't written anything new. Thank you all so much for getting me to 800+ views on my last poem! I really appreciated it, it put a smile on my facell knowing my last poem got through a lot of people.
Mida Burtons Feb 2018
from rain
should i turn into a storm?
howling like the wind
making noise
to get you to hear me?
more raindrops
more tears
to make you feel
drenched in remorse?
harsher and faster
much like a hurricane
to get you to see
how messed up i am?
when i'm strong
like the storm
would you love me more?
Mida Burtons Feb 2018
I want it to end , the pain, the torment
the feeling that I'm being ripped apart from inside out.
I walk around unnoticed
I sit crying, pleading for it all to stop.
I don't want it to feel this way.
There's nothing I can do differently,
it doesn't care.
This black cloud doesn't look at the person before affecting it.
It just does.
It just chooses never to leave.
Dakota J Dawson Feb 2018
He is bald
Plain to my eyes
Sublime in local geniality

The garden he claims
Taimed in distress
Of the coming winter

I fear the tears
Sudden regret
For his' long forgotten trials

Forced to steep so low
Forward but below
Entrenched in sweet tasting anguish

His' body hard and unmotivated
The Sculpture of obsession
Must be completed with stubborn muscle

I seem to torment him
My love becoming
A betrayal of our lust

Battles commence
Volcanic eruptions
Shake the house of ruin

He never seems to trust me
My compassionate actions
Bring forth pork chops

The meal
Is shared
Beside each other

Without Sight
We fight against
White picket fences
BW Jan 2018
I have nothing to offer you
The boy who has seen it all
They are all prettier, heels high
Bullet in chamber, want a piece of you
drives me nuts
So I turn, tuck my fear, on my heels for the run.

He had a silver spoon, then built an empire of gold
They whisper, they try to be the diamond
On your lapel. hurting my eyes
A clown in my best dress, I panick
An amateur to a critic, something too beautiful to touch

I have nothing to offer you, maybe I can cook
In your shirt, omakase on counter.
Maybe I can purr and sunbathe, wink and
dance in the streets, holding you in the crowd.
Wear a collar and paint my nails red on the lawn
I have a temper, I can be tamed too
If only you could see,but I bet you have seen all this before
I have
nothing to offer you at all

I wiped my tear off, they all looked at me with disgust
My lips were crimson, theirs drip blood
I should have known it was vain
Impressing the boy who has seen it all
Playing with fire, sinning with no return.

"I am very nice, don't be scared."

I turn around. You wipe my tears off. They gasp.
Maybe tomorrow you will stay, or you will be gone.
I reached for the light, one night, even one.
I want to belong to.
The boy who has seen it all.
To a great guy called Jason, he scares me and impresses me at the same time. He is a perfect guy and a boy who has seen it all, love him loads.
Seema Jan 2018
Forgotten was I,
Unnoticed in everyone's eye,
Everything I did for anyone;
They only seem to say goodbye,
I wonder why people tend to lie,
Am I the only one with this feel,
Trying to let this torment heal,
Of why people are good only from outside,
And so reckless rusted from inside,
No one to walk by my side,
Left alone for me to decide,
Of how I should let myself go,
But no one surely understands me, so
I have made myself a deal,
To be positive and work for my meal,
Diverting my negative vibes,
So it doesn't affect others lives,
With positivity I feel a glow of aura surround me,
That's all to everything I probably just want to be...


©sim
hannah kay Jan 2018
im standing, barely
    trying to see what's around me
im crying but no one can hear,
    not really
people throw their advice at me and it hits hard like ice against my skin
   and all i want is for someone to
hear me
    to really listen
they keep giving me words i did not ask for
  
we love you, we’re here for you
keep it; give it up
    life is hard; welcome to adult life

i open up to you
   but it’s still not enough
you’re the one who sees me cry;
   my tears are hidden by my smiles
to everyone else
you’re the one who knows my pain;
    my laugh hides the torment
from the outsiders

here i am, standing,
barely
wishing you knew
that i have given you
all there is to give.
Next page