I'd give anything
If I could have her.
I'd give anything,
If she could be my world.
I'd give anything to be her man,
I'd give everything.
But she will never see me as more than I am,
I will always try running from my feelings,
Taking girl after girl,
Always trying to make her jealous.
But it never works, and I end up with a broken heart.
And she has guy after guy, making me jealous every time.
I can't have her because we're too much like family,
Always close, but never close enough.
How cursed did I have to be to almost be her cousin?
If it were not for a summer love so long ago,
She would not even know me.
I wish I would never have even known her.
Like a whirlwind she came and did a number on my head,
Like a siren she calls but I can never run to her,
I can never indulge myself in her touch.
She teases without even knowing she's doing it.
I'd give anything to have never known her,
Because love never had is preferable over love always chased after.
I can never have her but she has me.
How depressing it is that I must tell you this,
If not you, then not anyone.
Besides, I would much rather profess my love to strangers than to the girl who unknowingly has my heart.
Even if she does know,
She must not think anything of it.
Because I am only her friend,
She will never see me as more than I am.
A friend of mine is going through this right now and I asked him if I could write about it. The situation is weird.
His mother was once engaged to her uncle. They would have been cousins, but since his mother and her uncle didn't get married, they never were. Now, his mother and her uncle stayed friends. He hung out with their family so much anyways that he was basically part of the family. And she started calling him her "brother", the protector that would beat up anyone to keep her safe.
This happened when he was around seven-eight years old. He is now 16, and has had a crush on her since he was ten. She still doesn't know.
The only reason I know is because I saw it, I could tell, and I asked him about it. He ended up confessing to me and told me not to tell anyone, especially her. Since he confided to me when we were 14, I haven't told anyone, and he continues to chase girl after girl so he can attempt to forget about her.
He's so afraid of rejection by her that he even ignores her completely when he feels he has the willpower to do so.