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1.8k · Sep 2016
I Don't Want to Lose You
Kayla Sep 2016
I don’t know what to do.
I don’t want to lose you.

I don’t know what to say.
I just want us to be okay.

I have to move on.
I’ve known for so long.

But I don’t want to.
I don’t want to lose you.

- kmh
1.4k · Oct 2016
Maple
Kayla Oct 2016
You’re beautiful;
A strong maple in autumn.
You don’t care about me.
You let me go,
As if I was the last leaf on your highest branch;
Slow and gentle;
Falling to the ground now.
You’ll grow new leaves in the spring.
I’ll just crumble into the earth below you.

- kmh
1.1k · Sep 2016
Storm
Kayla Sep 2016
My heart pounds like thunder.
Your eyes shine like lightning.
We crash together.
There’s a storm inside of me.

The sound is muffled,
The flashes slowing.
We’re diminishing now.
You brewed a hurricane inside of me.

The birds are out,
Chirping, whirling.
The sun is shining.
It’s over.

And you’re nowhere to be found.

- kmh
Not my best, but I think I'm getting over him.
958 · Oct 2016
Lost Boy
Kayla Oct 2016
I don’t know who I am anymore.
I’m just a lost boy at sea.
Crashing waves inside of me.
Saltwater in my veins.
Drowning in my pain.
The tide eases now.
I’m slowly recovering.
The waves at a halt.
I was once a lost boy.
And now I’m crowned the king.

- kmh
953 · Nov 2016
I Stopped Painting Flowers
Kayla Nov 2016
I stopped painting flowers for you today.
All the petals have fallen off.
You’re no longer part of my thoughts.
I’ve gotten you out of my head.
I loved you at one point,
But that time is over now.
I stopped painting flowers for you today.
Now there’s nothing left.

- kmh
884 · Aug 2016
High School
Kayla Aug 2016
I miss high school.
Not the overdramatic girl yelling at the top of her lungs.
Not the so-called friends that left me stranded.
Not the hours of homework on something I still don’t understand.
I miss people.
I miss moments.
I miss routine.
I miss him.

- kmh
877 · Aug 2016
Wrong
Kayla Aug 2016
I thought I was over you.
I thought I was done.
I thought I was moving on.

I stopped thinking about you.
I thought that was the end,
The end of something that never began.

I was wrong.

- kmh
873 · Sep 2016
Not Over You
Kayla Sep 2016
I thought I was okay.
I thought I was getting better,
finally getting over you.
But then there was a night that came;
I saw your face this time.
You were standing there,
as stunning as could be.
As much as I thought I didn’t want you to turn and look at me,
my heart pleaded for your attention,
even for a brief second.
Things happened that night;
not between you and I,
nor between the sun and the sky.
It was another love of mine.
Everything was shattering and it was my mistake.
It was deteriorating,
breaking at the roots.
But you were there,
and my heart skipped a beat.
I tried to pass it off,
but my heart wouldn’t budge.
That night I came to a realization:
I won’t be over you anytime soon.

- kmh
Feelings and thoughts. It's complicated...
823 · Aug 2016
Still You
Kayla Aug 2016
And somehow you're still the one.
You're still the same boy I love;
the one I fell for years ago.
You're still in my heart.
I know I'm not in yours,
but I can't help, but hold you in mine.
You were my first love.
And I know that no matter what I do,
I'll always be in love with you.

- kmh
785 · Jul 2016
You
Kayla Jul 2016
You
I love you.
I still do.
I was never yours.
And I know I never will be.
But these feelings won't go away.
I can't erase my memory of you.
You just won't fade away.
I guess you're here to stay.
I'll keep my distance.
I know you don't care.
I just really miss you.
And I know I always will.

- kmh
635 · Jul 2016
A Day at Sea
Kayla Jul 2016
I am lost.
Trapped in an ocean.
Waves of depression,
Crash against my heart.

There’s a lighthouse,
But she won’t show me the way.
The tide is coming in.
It rushes through me.

I see the coast,
But I can’t reach it.
The salt water stops me.
I am drowning.

- kmh
630 · Oct 2016
Just Friends
Kayla Oct 2016
You and me,
we have a past.
We have a history.
Never together;
almost, but not quite.

We were strangers.
We were friends.
We fell for each other.
But we couldn’t be together.
We both knew that.
We had history with others;
we just couldn’t let go.

We fell apart;
so close to love,
yet so far gone.
It dissolved.

But things change.
We’re friends again.
Really good ones at that.
Closer than before.
And that’s all we’ll be;
Just friends;
For now that is.

- kmh
So this guy and I went from complete strangers and ended up falling for each other, but we couldn't be together at the time because it was really complicated so we stopped talking. We started talking again after months and now we know that we're just staying friends for a while because we both still have feelings for other people that we just can't let go. And we're really close friends now so yeah...
579 · Jul 2016
Falling
Kayla Jul 2016
I'm falling back in love with you.
I know they say that you can't love someone you've never had.
They're wrong.
Like isn't a strong enough word for these feelings.
I'm falling back into you brown eyes and amazing smile.
I know you don't love me,
but I can't help, but fall.
I am falling into infinity,
And I'm just barely through the surface.

- kmh
542 · Oct 2016
Deep Breaths
Kayla Oct 2016
A smoke filled bedroom;
Pills on the side table.
His hands of ice.
Sliding down his pale skin.
Deep breaths.
He shudders.
His eyes once so blue,
They’ve turned to stone.
Deep breaths.
He panics.
The sadness inside him,
Overwhelmingly calm.
It creeps over his shoulder,
Flowing through his veins.
It washes over him now.
Deep breaths.
He exhales.
Silence.
It’s over now.

- kmh
I had the first two lines written down for a while not knowing what I wanted to do with them, but this is the result.
487 · Feb 2017
Ashes
Kayla Feb 2017
Smoke rises in the distance.
The smell of flames starts to replace the fresh air.
No creatures in sight.
None to be found.
Just the smell of fire.
Wild fire.
Burns show where it has been.
Like footprints in the snow.
The birds are silent.
The air dull.
Light is dim.
The fire has ended.
Ash lays everywhere.
On the tree tops.
On the forest ground and bushes.
Silence.
It is over.
The fire is out.
I wrote this when I was like 13 or 14 and I just found it again on a super old deviantART account and I kind of like it still so I figured I'd post it here.
468 · Oct 2016
Do You?
Kayla Oct 2016
Here’s to what if.
What if everything that happened between us was meant to be?
What if we could start over?
Would you be willing to meet again?
Or would you just stay in your ways and move on with life,
never questioning?
Maybe we weren’t meant to be together then,
but we’re older now and things, they change.
So have we? My feelings for you haven’t.
I still love you.
Do you love me?

- kmh
420 · Jul 2016
Light
Kayla Jul 2016
You're like gravity,
dragging me down to this hell we call heartbreak.
I'm crashing into the depths.
And the shadows call your name.

The demons within us,
they shatter in between,
leaving shards behind.
This pit is never-ending.

You used to be my light,
a lantern to lead the way.
Now I sit here all alone,
the space around me dark.

The air like the winter,
cold and heartless.
You left this hell.
Now I'm just hanging.

I know you're fighting your own demons,
but I know your hell is bright.
You have lanterns hung along the walls.
But I lost my only light.

I'll just sit here in the dark,
Waiting for it to come back on,
but I lost it.
I lost you.

- kmh
404 · Sep 2016
Stuck in Time
Kayla Sep 2016
I can’t be with someone that is glued to the past and so full of nostalgia.
I just can’t do it.
I can’t wait around for you to get to the present day.
Oh boy you’re stuck in time.
Who knows how long it will take for you to come to your senses?
I won’t wait around for someone like you.
I refuse to be dragged back in time,
for that will only hurt me more.
So I have to let you go.
Let you fall back so far behind.

- kmh
Pretty much.
329 · Jul 2016
Free
Kayla Jul 2016
I am overthinking.
I am always sinking,
into this abyss,
slowly, like a kiss.

Some days I am down.
Others I feel like a clown.
I just want to be free,
free of this anxiety.

I am not happy,
nor am I sad.
I'm full of panic,
not so manic.

I'm losing my sanity.
Held down only by gravity.
I just want to be free,
free of this anxiety.

- kmh

— The End —