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"slammer" poems
By Arcassin Burnham Like I said, There is no need to hide Ripping out your entrails, Punished for your betrayal, You will prevail, To be an enemy of Mine, now thats pErfect grammar Cause I'm actuaLLY attending to care to diss you, The ******** unfit mother you are, You should be in the slammer, Your kids wouldn't miss you. Now Thats Perfect Grammar
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Mar 4, 2015
Mar 4, 2015 at 11:43 PM UTC
"107 Diss #2"
Straight out of prison Wondering what I've been missing Right out of the gates I stuck out my thumb A van load of hippies All from Mississippi Stoped and asked, hey dude...what's going on I'm here for adventure Well hop in then Mister Adventure is what we're all about Now where we're all going There's no way of knowing A van of hippies and parolee freshly let out We ended up in Disney Me and all of the hippies Where we had caboodles of fun We met Mickey and he saw it When I lifted his wallet Now we're in the Magic Kingdom all on the run We split in different directions To throw off detection It's A Small World is where I made my mistake With that song stuck in my head It's a fate worse than death Prison now sounds like a wonderful place We rendezvoused in The Pirate's Of The Caribbean Where soon after, in came the law We all jumped from our boats Splashing around in the moat And had ourselves a good old fashioned pirate brawl We soon made our escape Out of exit door 88 Finding ourselves in Frontier Land at night Where in the middle of the street Were Mickey, Donald, and Goofy All with guns strapped to their sides We ran into a shop And bought guns on the spot All with Mickey's money...he's a mouse of a man Mickey squeeks we're going to ruff you up As Goofy holds up the cuffs And Donald says something we can't understand We had a shoot out With cap guns no doubt After all Disney runs a safe place Ran out of caps in our guns Which stopped our lives on the run The wrath of Mickey we all now would face After justice's hammer I'm now back in the slammer This time I made my own prison bed Now I cry every day What more can I say With It's A Small World still stuck in my head
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Aug 31, 2013
Aug 31, 2013 at 8:02 AM UTC
Some Hippies, A Convict, And Mickey Mouse
Straight out of prison Wondering what I've been missing Right out of the gates I stuck out my thumb A van load of hippies All from Mississippi Stoped and asked, hey dude...what's going on I'm here for adventure Well hop in then Mister Adventure is what we're all about Now where we're all going There's no way of knowing A van of hippies and parolee freshly let out We ended up in Disney Me and all of the hippies Where we had caboodles of fun We met Mickey and he saw it When I lifted his wallet Now we're in the Magic Kingdom all on the run We split in different directions To throw off detection It's A Small World is where I made my mistake With that song stuck in my head It's a fate worse than death Prison now sounds like a wonderful place We rendezvoused in The Pirate's Of The Caribbean Where soon after, in came the law We all jumped from our boats Splashing around in the moat And had ourselves a good old fashioned pirate brawl We soon made our escape Out of exit door 88 Finding ourselves in Frontier Land at night Where in the middle of the street Were Mickey, Donald, and Goofy All with guns strapped to their sides We ran into a shop And bought guns on the spot All with Mickey's money...he's a mouse of a man Mickey squeeks we're going to ruff you up As Goofy holds up the cuffs And Donald says something we can't understand We had a shoot out With cap guns no doubt After all Disney runs a safe place Ran out of caps in our guns Which stopped our lives on the run The wrath of Mickey we all now would face After justice's hammer I'm now back in the slammer This time I made my own prison bed Now I cry every day What more can I say With It's A Small World still stuck in my head
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54
The rainy season is at The door once again, And loneliness has Brought me a new pillow, But who is to defend My repugnant soul? Can it be the Gods? Hear this! The rain has Began knocking at my Slammer door gradually, Oh no, it is knocking And wailing so heavily, With his icy voice Of storm and cold Arresting my hearty dreams, But I will retch at his smell And hurry for my handkerchief, Where is my lantern? May be, the native doctor Has the answer to the Cylindrical jar containing Her eternal juniper organs, Indeed, it is my misfortune To go about with the priest, For even the child of The priest even dies at noon, Ah, I thought she was Vigilant and ever-ready To make the debtors Chew the palm kernels, But she became the Portion of the exterior of The *** that skin can cover, I have lost my heaven, Oh no, I have lost the One whose neck is like a Bunch of small-fingered plantain, I have lost the whetstone On which I sharpen My thirsty sword to Perform deeds of valour, Let the Gods weep! Let the ancestors wail! Let the people of Africa, Give me condolence of The talking drums, For their child is gone, The wise woman who cut Her thumb in order to get A wise husband is dead, Mother, the Okro full of Seeds of children and literature, Efua Sutherland, the queen, The toad likes water, but not When the water is boiling, Send me something When someone is coming, Efua Sutherland, the queen, You and I exchange gift. © PRINCE NANA ANIN-AGYEI Email: [email protected]
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Apr 8, 2013
Apr 8, 2013 at 5:58 AM UTC
EFUA SUTHERLAND
If you know the tale of El Chapo, You know then what will befall Even the person who's known as The most famous drug lord of all. Exporting more drugs to America Than anyone else in the past, El Chapo lived like a king On the millions of dollars he amassed. You didn't mess with El Chapo. Woe betide you if you did! Not only would you suffer, So would your spouse or your kid. Back in the 90s El Chapo Found himself in a scrape And landed in a Mexican prison, But he found a way to escape. A protracted stay in the slammer For him was not in the cards: He bought his way to freedom By bribing the prison guards. For thirteen years El Chapo Evaded capture and hid. He kept up his shady dealings While trying to stay off the grid. Authorities in Chicago Gave this man on the run Notoriety as Public Enemy Number One. In 2015 the drug lord Was back in prison again. This time he fled through a tunnel Dug by some of his men. One day marines closed in. They thought they'd caught their man. El Chapo held a child In his arms as he ran. Soon El Chapo got sloppy. No one could catch him, he thought. Alas, the marines tracked him down. Back to a cell he was brought. Now the Americans want him. Extradite him, they say. El Chapo will be an example To show that crime doesn't pay. So, say good-bye, El Chapo, As you sadly wipe your tears. We hope you like your new home; You're going to be there for years. Yes, say good-bye, El Chapo, To your Sinaloa Cartel. A maximum security prison Will be your new citadel. - by Bob B
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Oct 2, 2016
Oct 2, 2016 at 10:41 AM UTC
The Ballad of "El Chapo" (El Corrido de "El Chapo")
If you know the tale of El Chapo, You know then what will befall Even the person who's known as The most famous drug lord of all. Exporting more drugs to America Than anyone else in the past, El Chapo lived like a king On the millions of dollars he amassed. You didn't mess with El Chapo. Woe betide you if you did! Not only would you suffer, So would your spouse or your kid. Back in the 90s El Chapo Found himself in a scrape And landed in a Mexican prison, But he found a way to escape. A protracted stay in the slammer For him was not in the cards: He bought his way to freedom By bribing the prison guards. For thirteen years El Chapo Evaded capture and hid. He kept up his shady dealings While trying to stay off the grid. Authorities in Chicago Gave this man on the run Notoriety as Public Enemy Number One. In 2015 the drug lord Was back in prison again. This time he fled through a tunnel Dug by some of his men. One day marines closed in. They thought they'd caught their man. El Chapo held a child In his arms as he ran. Soon El Chapo got sloppy. No one could catch him, he thought. Alas, the marines tracked him down. Back to a cell he was brought. Now the Americans want him. Extradite him, they say. El Chapo will be an example To show that crime doesn't pay. So, say good-bye, El Chapo, As you sadly wipe your tears. We hope you like your new home; You're going to be there for years. Yes, say good-bye, El Chapo, To your Sinaloa Cartel. A maximum security prison Will be your new citadel. - by Bob B
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53
Hey Harvey Wallbanger I’d like you to tie me to the bedpost, baby And press your fuzzy navel to my *slippery ****** Give me your white angel kiss and I’ll lie down like a brown cow While between the sheets you play the Italian stallion. Like a kamikaze pilot head for my pink squirrel Then give me your ol’ Alabama slammer And pack a *** punch* into that screwdriver of yours. I want a *screaming ****** That’ll send me to blue heaven. Wu Wu! So, don’t mention that ****** Mary* With her devil’s kiss, Or you’ll find I can give a snake bite that’s as deadly as a B-52. Instead let’s ride into the tequila sunset in our golden Cadillac For *** on the beach* And on the sea breeze we'll hear an old love song sung by a ‘salty dog’ with a Gibson And watch a tropical storm over Manhattan We'll go to Peppermint Patti’s café And order an Irish coffee and a large slice of cherry pie. Happy, after dark let’s drive home for a *sloe comfortable ***** with satin pillows* And fall into the sweet surrender of a summer dream.
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Mar 6, 2010
Mar 6, 2010 at 7:58 AM UTC
Cocktail Order
Masticated Ectoplasm to Lance Corporal Tom Masticated Ectoplasm to Lance Corporal Tom Bumming your fat knobs and insert your helmet naked and unashamed Masticated Ectoplasm to Lance Corporal Tom Kicking off kick-off, cyborgs brought face to face Tartan sunstroke and may Mumbo Jumbo's **** all lie among you Nine, eleven, seven, thirteen, six, quinquereme, ******** ********* Tweedledum and Tweedledee, unsocial person, erectoffensive! This is Masticated Ectoplasm to Lance Corporal Tom You've really ****** the naval officer And the hatchet faces want to know whose blouses you abuse Now it's time to evacuate the ******* if you have a free hand This is Lance Corporal Tom to Masticated Ectoplasm I'm fancy dress dancing through the cat—flap And I'm groping inside a swollen grotesque sailor And the plums look gigantically unusual nowadays Ergo from Land's End to John o' Groats am I piddling in a crumpet slammer Telescopic hindward the lump Uranus Arsenic is scatological And there's sweet **** all I can have ****** *********** with With the proviso that I'm Ichabod celibate centipede sextillion heads I'm fondling vigorously paparazzo And I think my sputnik knows which direction to **** Tell my ballbreaker I ****** her vigorously for England, she bonks Masticated Ectoplasm to Lance Corporal Tom Your menstrual cycle's kaput, there's oojakapivvygizmo spleen Can you smell me, Lance Corporal Tom? Can you get to the bottom of me, Lance Corporal Tom? Can you delve into me, Lance Corporal Tom? Can you... From Land's End to John o' Groats am I vibrating ring my crumpet criminal lunatic asylum Telescopic hindward the groupie Uranus Arsenic is scatological And there's sweet **** all I can have ****** *********** with
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Mar 27, 2010
Mar 27, 2010 at 4:22 PM UTC
******* Type Transvestite
Masticated Ectoplasm to Lance Corporal Tom Masticated Ectoplasm to Lance Corporal Tom Bumming your fat knobs and insert your helmet naked and unashamed Masticated Ectoplasm to Lance Corporal Tom Kicking off kick-off, cyborgs brought face to face Tartan sunstroke and may Mumbo Jumbo's **** all lie among you Nine, eleven, seven, thirteen, six, quinquereme, ******** ********* Tweedledum and Tweedledee, unsocial person, erectoffensive! This is Masticated Ectoplasm to Lance Corporal Tom You've really ****** the naval officer And the hatchet faces want to know whose blouses you abuse Now it's time to evacuate the ******* if you have a free hand This is Lance Corporal Tom to Masticated Ectoplasm I'm fancy dress dancing through the cat—flap And I'm groping inside a swollen grotesque sailor And the plums look gigantically unusual nowadays Ergo from Land's End to John o' Groats am I piddling in a crumpet slammer Telescopic hindward the lump Uranus Arsenic is scatological And there's sweet **** all I can have ****** *********** with With the proviso that I'm Ichabod celibate centipede sextillion heads I'm fondling vigorously paparazzo And I think my sputnik knows which direction to **** Tell my ballbreaker I ****** her vigorously for England, she bonks Masticated Ectoplasm to Lance Corporal Tom Your menstrual cycle's kaput, there's oojakapivvygizmo spleen Can you smell me, Lance Corporal Tom? Can you get to the bottom of me, Lance Corporal Tom? Can you delve into me, Lance Corporal Tom? Can you... From Land's End to John o' Groats am I vibrating ring my crumpet criminal lunatic asylum Telescopic hindward the groupie Uranus Arsenic is scatological And there's sweet **** all I can have ****** *********** with
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33
three's up i'm throwing my life away throwing my three's up three **** summers in a row three nights in the slammer three days getting drunk been thinking about all my exes a lot been thinking about you a lot and how we'd spend the night doing homework and then sleeping together used to get me chicken nuggets afterwards and now you know what goes on in my brain *** programming and chicken nuggets from mcdonalds
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Oct 24, 2017
Oct 24, 2017 at 3:22 PM UTC
Post-sex chicken nuggets
Ah, Pinocchio--povero burattino°-- Always in a scrape; always in a jam. The irresponsible, wooden-headed numbskull Couldn't help but fall for every scam.   A walking, talking stringless marionette, Pinocchio really would have had it made In a modest home with babbo°° Gepetto. But, instead, the foolish youngster strayed.   Ignoring the advice of the talking cricket, Pinocchio EVEN smashed it with a hammer. That right there should have been a reason To throw the little rascal in the slammer.   The Fox and the Cat had no trouble Dissuading the puppet from going to school, Thus involving him in a series of adventures Which often made him look like a fool.   The Fairy tried to be a good influence, But Pinocchio's lies caused his nose to grow. Constantly ignoring responsibilities, The misguided boy, suffered constant woe.   (Swindled of his money, hanged on a tree, And saved just in the nick of time From being eaten, Pinocchio had Too many adventures to fit into this rhyme.)   Fleeing with his lazy school chum Lucignolo To the Paese dei balocchi,°°° there Pinocc Turned into a donkey. Of all his follies, This one had to be a masterstroke.   Once again a puppet, Pinocchio was swallowed By a giant Pesce-cane,°°°° and then guess what! The foolish boy was finally reunited With babbo Gepetto in the fish's huge gut.   NOT until Pinocchio thought about others And proved he was an honest and caring boy Did his fortune start to change for the better, And the stringless puppet became the real McCoy.   Does Pinocchio by any chance remind you Of any politicians out there at all Who fail to listen to expert advice And thumb their noses at common protocol?   And speaking of noses, we can also see Politicians' noses grow as they tell lies. Lying to themselves and to others as well And ignoring our best interests and flouting compromise.   Such politicians--unlike Pinocchio-- Have strings to pull when performing for the masses. The more they avoid solving REAL issues, The more they end up looking like *****   They also love--these clever burattini-- To sell a bill of goods and promise many things. But someone out there--or some corporation-- Is slyly and cleverly pulling their strings.   Do you ever wonder if these same politicians Ever think about or care how you feel? Will they eventually--as did Pinocchio-- Prove they have what it takes to be real?     °(burattino/i) - poor little puppet °°(babbo) - dad(dy) °°°(Paese dei balocchi) - Playland °°°°(Pesce-cane) - shark - by Bob B
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Nov 8, 2016
Nov 8, 2016 at 2:39 PM UTC
Ah, Pinocchio!
Ah, Pinocchio--povero burattino°-- Always in a scrape; always in a jam. The irresponsible, wooden-headed numbskull Couldn't help but fall for every scam.   A walking, talking stringless marionette, Pinocchio really would have had it made In a modest home with babbo°° Gepetto. But, instead, the foolish youngster strayed.   Ignoring the advice of the talking cricket, Pinocchio EVEN smashed it with a hammer. That right there should have been a reason To throw the little rascal in the slammer.   The Fox and the Cat had no trouble Dissuading the puppet from going to school, Thus involving him in a series of adventures Which often made him look like a fool.   The Fairy tried to be a good influence, But Pinocchio's lies caused his nose to grow. Constantly ignoring responsibilities, The misguided boy, suffered constant woe.   (Swindled of his money, hanged on a tree, And saved just in the nick of time From being eaten, Pinocchio had Too many adventures to fit into this rhyme.)   Fleeing with his lazy school chum Lucignolo To the Paese dei balocchi,°°° there Pinocc Turned into a donkey. Of all his follies, This one had to be a masterstroke.   Once again a puppet, Pinocchio was swallowed By a giant Pesce-cane,°°°° and then guess what! The foolish boy was finally reunited With babbo Gepetto in the fish's huge gut.   NOT until Pinocchio thought about others And proved he was an honest and caring boy Did his fortune start to change for the better, And the stringless puppet became the real McCoy.   Does Pinocchio by any chance remind you Of any politicians out there at all Who fail to listen to expert advice And thumb their noses at common protocol?   And speaking of noses, we can also see Politicians' noses grow as they tell lies. Lying to themselves and to others as well And ignoring our best interests and flouting compromise.   Such politicians--unlike Pinocchio-- Have strings to pull when performing for the masses. The more they avoid solving REAL issues, The more they end up looking like *****   They also love--these clever burattini-- To sell a bill of goods and promise many things. But someone out there--or some corporation-- Is slyly and cleverly pulling their strings.   Do you ever wonder if these same politicians Ever think about or care how you feel? Will they eventually--as did Pinocchio-- Prove they have what it takes to be real?     °(burattino/i) - poor little puppet °°(babbo) - dad(dy) °°°(Paese dei balocchi) - Playland °°°°(Pesce-cane) - shark - by Bob B
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61
Sunday Morning blues RIO DE JANEIRO all nights or LAS VEGAS nightlife After two-three glasses of twisted Ice lemon Or was it an Alabama Slammer which cut like a knife My days and nights felt like a freight train ride And that no lie! I remember the Cuban Bulldog who bite me three years ago, in Kissimmee; which left me more than a little weak those feisty drinks Or was it that wicked, wacky Long Island Ice coffee Which almost has done me in? After, watching a news clips of Momar Kadafi or was it an episode of Friends Luckily, for me I met my sweet Marlin Brando And it was hallelujah and amen in Key Largo So many bartenders, so many smokes filled rooms So, once again here I am nursing Another Sunday mornings blues.
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Oct 30, 2013
Oct 30, 2013 at 10:13 AM UTC
Sunday Morning Blues
I'll killa chawawa Sell it for a dolla on Alibaba Exchange for a Kawala Black range red impala Rocking nirvana pre Madonna A Chubby monkey eating chunky monkey with ice cream and a banana Bo bama Ina pajama spinning a spammer after a root beer slammer an alabamer and a cheese platter I slide off in a subtle manner like a salamander to empty my bladder in a place that doesn't matter
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Nov 11, 2014
Nov 11, 2014 at 9:19 AM UTC
funny flow
Sing me a soft song To send me to sleep I can’t stand another night Hearing this lullaby: weep There’s a monster inside You fought for years But now it’s multiplied Fueled by fear It swallows the good And nourishes the bad Never have I hated Something so invisible to my eye I can only imagine what it’s doing to you On the inside Universe’s sweet irony The baby dies first Not a day goes by That can quench my thirst Longing for justice For the underdog family When will it be our turn? They say ‘what goes around comes around’-- How come we keep getting burned? We’ve served our time And a little more too But we’re thrown back in the slammer Does that sound just to you? When does the world stop spinning? When does the pain end? Why does it strike as soon as we’re on the mend? The more the merrier, But it sends evil’s ratio askew. The choice wasn’t ours It’s what we were born into. Still I wouldn’t trade it You can’t know love without loss Still I wish I could save it My family in a locket, Not for God to toss.
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Nov 22, 2012
Nov 22, 2012 at 1:35 AM UTC
Locket
Miss me Missed me Now you've got to kiss me. If you kiss me mister, I might tell my sister. If I tell her, she might tell my mother and my mother, she might tell my father and my father, he won't be too happy, he'll have to come up from the city, And then we both can't be happy, so I wouldn't miss me, if you get me, mister see? Missed me, miss me now, If you kiss me, you must think I'm pretty. If you think so, you must want to **** me. If you **** me, it must mean you love me. If you love me, you would never leave me it's as simple as can be! So Mister, now you've got to kiss me. If you miss me, mister, why do you keep leaving me? if you trick me, I will make you suffer, and they'll get you, mister, put you in the slammer and forget you, then you'll miss me won't you, miss me? Missed me, missed me, now you've got no chance to kiss me. if you kissed me, mister, take responsibility. I'm fragile, mister, just like any girl would be so misunderstood so treat me good, so treat me delicately. Missed... now you've gone and done it, hope you're happy in the county penitentiary it serves you right for kissing little girls, but I will visit, if you miss me. Say you miss me! How's the food? they "feed" you? Do you miss me? Will you kiss me, through the window? Will they ever let you go? I miss you mister, so....
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Apr 25, 2015
Apr 25, 2015 at 7:24 PM UTC
tired tongue, young gun.
How Much Gets Me On A Bus? to the City? (I live 30 minutes away) more than this ever will - POETRY I’ve been writing ‘poems’ ever since I remember ever since 11 – reciting these phenomenal words of wisdom to any and all who would listen forcing family-members & friends that’s the thing about poetry, it makes you feel like it’s important, makes you think the words you sling together aren’t really yours it comes to you, through you, needs to come out of you, and when its over you’re just as amazed as they should be. but they’re not, I mean they like poetry, admire it, even enjoy it sometimes, but they could honestly give it up in a heartbeat, live without it. You know what I mean? I’m like you like all the people who come here I'm part poetry as poetry is me A Dodge Poetry Attendee many years – my arm once around Gwendolyn Brooks, cried in a church with Lucille Clifton talked Newark to Baraka – know the honorable Slammer, Patricia Smith! I’ve sat many years with the Lords of Literature - my professors who all seemed to know “whose got it” the intellectuals of American prose who seem to be searching for a rookie, the next best troubadour college-student that will grace their faculty-doors… The poetry I read here is incredible Some of the best stuff on the net, poignant, painful , honest, raw, sensual, serious – provokingly real words I read here startle me, stun me at times so clear in meaning, well-crafted, chosen words unusually strong They’re the kind of words the got-it people have, the poet people (probably all people have) poetry is just another way of finding an infallible song – (I still say we should go sing it on the bus!)
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Jul 26, 2013
Jul 26, 2013 at 11:29 PM UTC
A "Hello Poetry' Tribute
How Much Gets Me On A Bus? to the City? (I live 30 minutes away) more than this ever will - POETRY I’ve been writing ‘poems’ ever since I remember ever since 11 – reciting these phenomenal words of wisdom to any and all who would listen forcing family-members & friends that’s the thing about poetry, it makes you feel like it’s important, makes you think the words you sling together aren’t really yours it comes to you, through you, needs to come out of you, and when its over you’re just as amazed as they should be. but they’re not, I mean they like poetry, admire it, even enjoy it sometimes, but they could honestly give it up in a heartbeat, live without it. You know what I mean? I’m like you like all the people who come here I'm part poetry as poetry is me A Dodge Poetry Attendee many years – my arm once around Gwendolyn Brooks, cried in a church with Lucille Clifton talked Newark to Baraka – know the honorable Slammer, Patricia Smith! I’ve sat many years with the Lords of Literature - my professors who all seemed to know “whose got it” the intellectuals of American prose who seem to be searching for a rookie, the next best troubadour college-student that will grace their faculty-doors… The poetry I read here is incredible Some of the best stuff on the net, poignant, painful , honest, raw, sensual, serious – provokingly real words I read here startle me, stun me at times so clear in meaning, well-crafted, chosen words unusually strong They’re the kind of words the got-it people have, the poet people (probably all people have) poetry is just another way of finding an infallible song – (I still say we should go sing it on the bus!)
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44
------- Regurgitated dreams and a handful of hopes slipping grain-like through my fingers promisisng the earth as it cracks withered and drying. desolation and anticipation brings the threat of pleasure like the seed of hope without the chance of bursting open. Endless gurantees of endless possibilities and your stupid God **** provisos. **** the last drop with insistence, take all you can, Im already dead inside. with all the graciousness afforded you'd think you could at least turn away when I cry? Instead you watch, a look of  abomination carved into your hateful eyes and ice cold detachment running down your spine. no matter, I'll be fine; you were only ever a sympathy case that grew too wild. all that tender love and care without pruning has a tendency to create monsters you sting my rosy buds a sadistic wash of passion red I'm tangled in your mess, you might as well lick the salt as well the tequila slammer hit hard. I can't seem to locate my vanity its still missing after that last masochistic kiss goodbye.
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Jun 26, 2014
Jun 26, 2014 at 9:52 PM UTC
Masochistic kiss
Naked Found naked on the streets, cuffs on my hands and feet. They wouldn't give me any clothes, couldn't even pick my own **** nose. Walked naked to the police station, two miles of total frustration. One hour of pure hell, I'm hot, sticky and I really smell. People laughing from their front yard, I looked like an unstable ****** ***** bouncing left to right, my big ***** should be held every night. ***** flopping up and down, not even sure the name of the town. They don't even give me reason, maybe it's naked man in street season. Police station filled with reporters, my ***** has never been shorter. Hundreds of flashes before my eyes, I see my mom, nervous as she cries. I was arrested for **** street sleeping, millions of people are now peeping. I got booked and thrown in the slammer, somebody please, hit my head with a hammer. They actually even threw away the key, how dare they do this to someone like me. Don't they know who I am, this must be some kind of sham. I'm only the most famous man in America, not some cheap imitation replica. I hope no one gives me an Allen ***** then I won't know what to do. No phone call or allowed any bail, looks like I'm stuck in this ****** jail. After a week I was finally let go, I was the star of some sick reality show.
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Feb 3, 2014
Feb 3, 2014 at 1:05 PM UTC
Naked
Everybody called her her baby's momma She could never see so straight always crooked winding up in the slammer apologizing all over the place She's got a handle on it this time moved into a clean and sober house going to those meetings five days a week But her eyes they burned, You know Her eyes they burned Made a mistake Went to see her ex old man Got strung out again on that ****** Thrown out of the house for nodding out, coffee cup in hand, never spilled a drop She's back out on the street Looking for the woman's emergency  night shelter Texting with her daughter trying to repair their relationship saying "It'll be okay this time" She's got her brand new teeth, a two day voucher to The Days Inn It'll be okay. Always the nut house if the night gets too cold At least until the Psychiatrist figures it out And throws her back out into the night It's tough being human You know You know Her baby's momma She's in despair Looking for help everywhere Detox filled Got a blow job for anybody somebody named Joe Sometimes that's all she knows Gather's herself against the cold Swears that tomorrow she'll get it together she promises you You know Doing everything except what you're supposed to Deal with it tomorrow Everybody called her Her baby's momma When she sees you She's in sorrow.
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May 4, 2017
May 4, 2017 at 11:20 PM UTC
Her Baby's Momma
gaga and gall are walking down the street gaga sees some bling, gall goes in and steals they end up in the slammer and gansta's there to greet gall punches gangsta and naturally gore appeals gaga wakes from the dream, guts tries to console he offers her an option and they both get outa' da hole now gall, gangsta and gore while in solitary meet with goner and good ol' grouch glory hallelujah comes up with the key all escaping sideways from sleeping gangeree they keep running into gutter, introduced to giddy all on this gollywoggle jolly hallow night all whipped up and painted by yours truly gimmicky. (halloween 2016)
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Oct 29, 2017
Oct 29, 2017 at 6:55 AM UTC
Gaga and Company
The wrapes of Grath adorn the path that slammer klingks had tread when turning spades in everglades to flosticate the dead. Along the way the snorbels bay at freebled sprutelned that boogeymen had once again uphove above the shed. The buildings tall that housed the krawl are pictured carved in stone and all that’s left is now bereft of wrapes that might atone for scabs that feed our wrinkled breed, distraught and lying prone. Yes, flonk replaces merpeled traces deep inside, alone. There’s no retreat from incomplete, so durbies never dared, but streaped instead beneath their bed with franjent fangs unbeared; they knew the past could never last although the trumpets blared, for doogies, stripped, were ill equipped, no longer bald or haired. Like cavaliers with gougejent spears, well triggered for a tiff, slank vankulures with silver spurs embussed for grimp and griff (no question why, for “we can’t die”, the oft regleated riff); with little fuss the blunder bus krunged glimpfly off the cliff and fetid breet of grim defeat gave Grath its final whiff; the catapult had one result, all life lay lazelled stiff. The plastic waves that washed the graves, now homeland for the rutch, though faring worse when quenching thirst with warples in the hutch were nonetheless, as frunks confess, so pleasant to the touch exturbing sinks that watered wynx and onetime life as such. Like burning blotters slurping waters, skindles sipped their fill from koozing cracks between the tracks inhumed beneath the hill, then spawned the spores of Grathic wars that profit from the **** their victory tales, like crimson crails, reside in dung and dill. Those scrilly clouds that cowed the crowds neath radiation snapes left little less than watercress beneath their coffin’s drapes; yes, those unborn cannot adorn the pallor of the prapes so scrundlemun tinge bibberun, we ones who reap the wrapes. Yes, now-abandoned hetzelspan were once in time embroiled with merikained that firps extained until the weather roiled. What more, perchance, can happenstance inflict upon the koiled when pendlesnips are in eclipse and wrapes of Grath are soiled?
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Jul 1, 2021
Jul 1, 2021 at 5:07 PM UTC
3121 CE - The Wrapes of Grath
The wrapes of Grath adorn the path that slammer klingks had tread when turning spades in everglades to flosticate the dead. Along the way the snorbels bay at freebled sprutelned that boogeymen had once again uphove above the shed. The buildings tall that housed the krawl are pictured carved in stone and all that’s left is now bereft of wrapes that might atone for scabs that feed our wrinkled breed, distraught and lying prone. Yes, flonk replaces merpeled traces deep inside, alone. There’s no retreat from incomplete, so durbies never dared, but streaped instead beneath their bed with franjent fangs unbeared; they knew the past could never last although the trumpets blared, for doogies, stripped, were ill equipped, no longer bald or haired. Like cavaliers with gougejent spears, well triggered for a tiff, slank vankulures with silver spurs embussed for grimp and griff (no question why, for “we can’t die”, the oft regleated riff); with little fuss the blunder bus krunged glimpfly off the cliff and fetid breet of grim defeat gave Grath its final whiff; the catapult had one result, all life lay lazelled stiff. The plastic waves that washed the graves, now homeland for the rutch, though faring worse when quenching thirst with warples in the hutch were nonetheless, as frunks confess, so pleasant to the touch exturbing sinks that watered wynx and onetime life as such. Like burning blotters slurping waters, skindles sipped their fill from koozing cracks between the tracks inhumed beneath the hill, then spawned the spores of Grathic wars that profit from the **** their victory tales, like crimson crails, reside in dung and dill. Those scrilly clouds that cowed the crowds neath radiation snapes left little less than watercress beneath their coffin’s drapes; yes, those unborn cannot adorn the pallor of the prapes so scrundlemun tinge bibberun, we ones who reap the wrapes. Yes, now-abandoned hetzelspan were once in time embroiled with merikained that firps extained until the weather roiled. What more, perchance, can happenstance inflict upon the koiled when pendlesnips are in eclipse and wrapes of Grath are soiled?
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34
A book lay open on the table by her bed I looked at the cover blue well worn named Byron a friend gave me it Julie said can't make head or tails yet the ward was quiet blinds were pulled up sunlight came in blue and white over duller white she in a flowery gown pink flowers small on white cloth tied at the waist leg crossed over the other slippered feet thin ankles not read him I said died in Greece she said who? I asked Byron she said she pulled a cigarette from an open packet and lit up I’ve read Shelley I said he drowned in Italy I think she inhaled smoke rose grey white lifting ceiling ward thin fingers held fingers parted slightly curved as if sculptured I sat on her hospital bed firm blue blanket white pillows solid Guy's in the slammer she said drug taking and selling I said nothing looked at her lips holding the cigarette opened and closed hair untidy won't see him in a while the parents will be glad didn’t like him have class of course his parents that is she said I studied the cleavage where the gown lay open small valley darkness sinking when I get out of here she said we must meet in London again I looked away from her cleavage outside the sound of hard falling rain.
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May 8, 2014
May 8, 2014 at 4:10 PM UTC
HARD RAIN.
Straight out of prison Wondering what I've been missing Right out of the gates I stuck out my thumb A van load of hippies All from Mississippi Stoped and asked, hey dude...what's going on I'm here for adventure Well hop in then Mister Adventure is what we're all about Now where we're all going There's no way of knowing A van of hippies and parolee freshly let out We ended up in Disney Me and all of the hippies Where we had caboodles of fun We met Mickey and he saw it When I lifted his wallet Now we're in the Magic Kingdom all on the run We split in different directions To throw off detection It's A Small World is where I made my mistake With that song stuck in my head It's a fate worse than death Prison now sounds like a wonderful place We rendezvoused in The Pirate's Of The Caribbean Where soon after, in came the law We all jumped from our boats Splashing around in the moat And had ourselves a good old fashioned pirate brawl We soon made our escape Out of exit door 88 Finding ourselves in Frontier Land at night Where in the middle of the street Were Mickey, Donald, and Goofy All with guns strapped to their sides We ran into a shop And bought guns on the spot All with Mickey's money...he's a mouse of a man Mickey squeeks we're going to ruff you up As Goofy holds up the cuffs And Donald says something we can't understand We had a shoot out With cap guns no doubt After all Disney runs a safe place Ran out of caps in our guns Which stopped our lives on the run The wrath of Mickey we all now would face After justice's hammer I'm now back in the slammer This time I made my own prison bed Now I cry every day What more can I say With It's A Small World still stuck in my head
0
Mar 24, 2018
Mar 24, 2018 at 9:21 AM UTC
Some Hippies, A Convict, And Mickey Mouse
Straight out of prison Wondering what I've been missing Right out of the gates I stuck out my thumb A van load of hippies All from Mississippi Stoped and asked, hey dude...what's going on I'm here for adventure Well hop in then Mister Adventure is what we're all about Now where we're all going There's no way of knowing A van of hippies and parolee freshly let out We ended up in Disney Me and all of the hippies Where we had caboodles of fun We met Mickey and he saw it When I lifted his wallet Now we're in the Magic Kingdom all on the run We split in different directions To throw off detection It's A Small World is where I made my mistake With that song stuck in my head It's a fate worse than death Prison now sounds like a wonderful place We rendezvoused in The Pirate's Of The Caribbean Where soon after, in came the law We all jumped from our boats Splashing around in the moat And had ourselves a good old fashioned pirate brawl We soon made our escape Out of exit door 88 Finding ourselves in Frontier Land at night Where in the middle of the street Were Mickey, Donald, and Goofy All with guns strapped to their sides We ran into a shop And bought guns on the spot All with Mickey's money...he's a mouse of a man Mickey squeeks we're going to ruff you up As Goofy holds up the cuffs And Donald says something we can't understand We had a shoot out With cap guns no doubt After all Disney runs a safe place Ran out of caps in our guns Which stopped our lives on the run The wrath of Mickey we all now would face After justice's hammer I'm now back in the slammer This time I made my own prison bed Now I cry every day What more can I say With It's A Small World still stuck in my head
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54
Anna lived in 3 walls and iron bars, Put down for; as if she were rabid dog. Pleaded virtuous to the homicide up the park, Veritas is what she spoke; her mind was in no fog. Anna struggled in the slammer; an easy target, Holly was the girl who made her "life" a living hell. Day in; Day out; she obliterated the passion to live through it, And started to dream of a Rose Cottage; outside her cell. Anna was cocksure of a way out; a one way ticket, So she lacerated her bed sheets at the crack of dawn. "Morituri te salutant" read the ticket, On the Rose Cottage train; or as some call "The Morgue"
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May 22, 2018
May 22, 2018 at 1:19 PM UTC
Rose Cottage
There's something about my wife that astounds me. She won't use any appliance unless it's made by GE. I bought her a washing machine that was made by Whirlpool. That was a dumb decision and I soon learned that I'm a fool. My wife got so mad that she caved my head in with a claw hammer. Now she's holding a grudge because she spent a year in the slammer. General Electric appliances are the only appliances she will use. I'll remember that in the future because I don't like to be abused. She demands GE appliances because GE brings good things to life. From now on, I'll buy nothing but GE because I'm scared of my wife.
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Jul 14, 2018
Jul 14, 2018 at 3:21 PM UTC
GE Appliances
Daniel raced some ****** in the year of the monkey For a brand new set of vintage strings Beat the ****** real easy, took the vintage guitar And smiled “hey man it’s just one of these things” Placed the guitar over his shoulder, like a baby he held her Closed his eyes and played some chords With the chords came some lyrics, in the darkness he sat In the center of Jensen Grand Concert Hall The ghost on the piano, she preformed a haunting solo Behind him was a phantom band In front a phantom crowd In the pre-warm up show, he rocked the empty old concert hall stand Outside some kids from Coltman, Drinking some beer and just smoking some crack He and the phantom band headed home Past the house of the Pocatello Nymphomaniac Daniel walked up the stairs, sat on his chair, pulled out his guitar and played Next door the neighbors sat with their ears to the wall listening to the midnight serenade The old boy across the road in Jasmine Street opened the window, to hear the guitar crying Listening to the sound of the junkies strings and the, silent neighbors smiling In the morning he was still playing, his fingers red, they were getting tired, The audience next door exhausted on the floor but, still smiling Now back to the grand concert hall for his first ever gig, and the posters all around the town Read Daniel and his 6 ****** strings are going to bring the house down The local poet society, were reciting poetry to me, empty chairs in the hall, I stand on the stage looking for familiarity,on this day I’ve waited for The first ones through the door were the neighbors who made love to my music Tears still in their eyes from last night’s show, they took my gift of music and abused it And the man from down the block he’s here too he shouted “Daniel this world needs more **** musicians like you” Fat Shane from Mobile Alabama who’s just come out the slammer on day release to just see me Soon the hall’s filled with 1200 faces all crowded in this space but there’s just 2 empty seats One is for my mother who’s 3 years passed and told me son always follow your dreams And the others for the ****** and the Monkey who lost the race and gifted these vintage strings to me
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Sep 9, 2016
Sep 9, 2016 at 12:06 PM UTC
The ****** And The Monkey
Daniel raced some ****** in the year of the monkey For a brand new set of vintage strings Beat the ****** real easy, took the vintage guitar And smiled “hey man it’s just one of these things” Placed the guitar over his shoulder, like a baby he held her Closed his eyes and played some chords With the chords came some lyrics, in the darkness he sat In the center of Jensen Grand Concert Hall The ghost on the piano, she preformed a haunting solo Behind him was a phantom band In front a phantom crowd In the pre-warm up show, he rocked the empty old concert hall stand Outside some kids from Coltman, Drinking some beer and just smoking some crack He and the phantom band headed home Past the house of the Pocatello Nymphomaniac Daniel walked up the stairs, sat on his chair, pulled out his guitar and played Next door the neighbors sat with their ears to the wall listening to the midnight serenade The old boy across the road in Jasmine Street opened the window, to hear the guitar crying Listening to the sound of the junkies strings and the, silent neighbors smiling In the morning he was still playing, his fingers red, they were getting tired, The audience next door exhausted on the floor but, still smiling Now back to the grand concert hall for his first ever gig, and the posters all around the town Read Daniel and his 6 ****** strings are going to bring the house down The local poet society, were reciting poetry to me, empty chairs in the hall, I stand on the stage looking for familiarity,on this day I’ve waited for The first ones through the door were the neighbors who made love to my music Tears still in their eyes from last night’s show, they took my gift of music and abused it And the man from down the block he’s here too he shouted “Daniel this world needs more **** musicians like you” Fat Shane from Mobile Alabama who’s just come out the slammer on day release to just see me Soon the hall’s filled with 1200 faces all crowded in this space but there’s just 2 empty seats One is for my mother who’s 3 years passed and told me son always follow your dreams And the others for the ****** and the Monkey who lost the race and gifted these vintage strings to me
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32
You introduced me to a game that neither of us can ever win, So let's just stop rolling the dice. I no longer have the moves to bring me to the home square, And I've used my only get out of jail free card, Next time, it's the slammer for sure. In strategic thinking, he can beat us both hands down, So put away the playing pieces, Fold up the board, Let's declare a stalemate. Joint losers, Game over, Time to call it quits.
0
Dec 28, 2013
Dec 28, 2013 at 8:20 AM UTC
Game Over
Many of the world's greatest Leaders throughout our tumultuous history have; Many of  the insightful Revolutionaries in stink hole and glory hole countries have; Many of the oppressed, disenfranchised and cheated also have. Look to Lenin, Mandela, Gandi, Nehru, Havel, Bhutto, Ceausescu, Charles I, Papadopoulos, Lady Jane Grey, Louis XVI, Marcos, Milosevic, a pile of Mohameds, Mussolini, Nicholas II, Pinochet, Saddam, Marie Antoinette, Pope Clement V, Selassie, Baghdadi, Duvalier, and, let's not forget the author of Mien Kampf, Adolph the Tenderizer. And what do they all have in common? Some, before they became boldly notorious, and others, after they became criminally notorious. Some, looked out their window and saw platforms being erected. Others witnessed gallows, guillotines. posts and walls. They all got some time in: PRISON. GAOL. JAIL. COOLER. LOCKUP.  DUNGEON. KEEP. PEN. BASTILLE. CLINK. STATESVILLE. SLAMMER. STOCKADE. THE BIG HOUSE. You get the idea. His time will come.
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Nov 21, 2020
Nov 21, 2020 at 9:50 AM UTC
Give Him a Little Time