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Nov 6 · 163
settled
Ash Nov 6
tonight, i pull my blanket up to my chin
unsure if it is to comfort or suffocate
whether i slumber for good, or to wake
in a world most unfamiliar
Oct 4 · 298
In the dark
Ash Oct 4
The bed only knows the weight
That leaves it for, unknowingly, the last time;
The warmth no longer pressed to its quilt,
The down that will never sink again
This came to my mind at around 3:00 AM last night, the perspective of the bed. It was built and made to serve us at our most restless, our most vulnerable, but we don’t often lend it the kindness to tell it why someone leaves. Does it know? Or does it wallow thinking it has wronged us in some way?
Sep 18 · 269
never bear to bury it
Ash Sep 18
and while I claim to be free
to soar over these fairytale castles
into bigger dreams, better things
some part of me still dwells here
and begs—would you still have me?
Sep 13 · 38
Untitled
Ash Sep 13
my mother's wedding dress
cut through the middle,
a red ribbon slashed against skin
unwound, destroyed, unknown
Aug 13 · 332
cyclic
Ash Aug 13
the moonlight glints off your fingertips
catching the glow—“just for you,” you say

the voice entwines with my ear, winds down
to my heart, pooling at the bottom of my chest
like a loaded gun, waiting for the trigger
to be squeezed just so, ending this sweet dream again
Jul 27 · 212
unspoken
Ash Jul 27
words that can only be whispered
in dreams and midnight longings;
the melancholy lilt of a time fading
echoes into the silence, unbound
Jun 1 · 118
Untitled
Ash Jun 1
in sudden grief and desperation
words I cannot even bear to dress
in floral or elegant prose
escape from me, in a wailing breath

where have you gone?
May 19 · 556
boundless
Ash May 19
as I step into this expanse
wild, roaring ocean and fields of sand
a breath enters and escapes me;
I find that my ghosts are falling behind
I made it to high school graduation. ❤️‍🩹
Apr 27 · 601
in the silence
Ash Apr 27
the shadow of that dagger
still hovers behind me
waiting, aiming to strike
Apr 17 · 807
A midnight walk
Ash Apr 17
An oath uttered to none is an oath unbound,
but the watchers, the gargoyles of the sky and the earth,
are all witness in the night
Apr 5 · 290
Remnants
Ash Apr 5
Smoke, ember, and ash—
remnants of flame,
memories, imprints of a taste so sweet,
of heart, bridge, and stake set alight,
drifting on the wind,
coming to rest in my open palms
Mar 14 · 130
a poison so sweet
Ash Mar 14
hope coiled like a serpent around my neck
suffocating, like the smoke that fell from your fire,
burning away everything that stood here

but I kneel in the blackened soil
and rub charcoal and ash in the webbing
between my fingers—where yours once rested

appeased, she slackens, falling from my shoulders
as though dead, before slithering into the night,
beckoning—to follow her farther into the wasteland

I find my footsteps falling in her path
though she asks only one thing of me—to believe
to ration my reason, starve off my doubt

I protest with silence, but hope is a dangerous thing,
and knows that despite her, I will always return—
and never with a sword
Feb 27 · 113
A woman's reputation
Ash Feb 27
If my name's been dragged through the mud
Then at least it left a mark

What are you without cursing my legacy?
Feb 21 · 184
Smoke signal
Ash Feb 21
I wake and look to the trees
Sunlight lapsed for sodden fog
Grey coiled around every needle,
Smoke-signal wisps into the night

I wake and look to the trees
Blinding white dusted like ash
Mourning, slowly, the forest whole
Bends under the weight
Ash Feb 17
The choir swells, wails, their song drowned
by your splinters of rapture in the night...
When you stand atop rubble and lingering flame
who will remain to laud your victory?
Feb 14 · 1.0k
The death of daydreams
Ash Feb 14
And so I dig a shallow grave
for the fairytale castles
All of a love that never was,
laid softly in the earth
Feb 13 · 274
lucent
Ash Feb 13
my heartstrings were woven delicately,
soft and sweet, every pluck and tug
dedicated to some passion, conviction,
and the last, to soul-crushing devotion
Feb 8 · 634
Signed
Ash Feb 8
An arrow pinched
Between delicate fingers,
Gently nocked, but aiming true,
Pulled taut against the bowstring.

It sings through the air,
Harmonious, but decisive,
And it strikes silently,
Knowing only one destination.

...And so begins Cupid's hunting season.
Feb 8 · 2.3k
If You'll Have Me
Ash Feb 8
I'd paint you in dreamscapes—
visions of rolling hills
and fields of autumn leaves,
your form draped in grass
and sunset dapple—
porcelain, delicate beauty,
a work of art, the way I see you
Feb 5 · 161
shaper
Ash Feb 5
Those delicate eyes
catch the light, glinting
'cross this fickle sword,
my evasive desire
Feb 2 · 336
loft
Ash Feb 2
there is no greater love
than one that transpires despite adversity—
one that stands tall and sturdy as the oak,
unmoved by any wind that dares to face it
Jan 17 · 2.2k
Dear son of Michelangelo
Ash Jan 17
Why, you must be a man made of marble—
What else could have sculpted a face so beautiful
And a form so lithe, yet untouchable?
Jan 12 · 224
without witness
Ash Jan 12
I walk a ghost among the mourners,
plucking stitch
after stitch
into my own burial shroud

—with a rose
tucked into the sleeve

as though one day,
a dedicated love might find itself here
Jan 9 · 506
facing the sea
Ash Jan 9
if I can make only one request
would you dream of me?
Dec 2023 · 1.2k
hopeless romantic, def.
Ash Dec 2023
the veil of glamour and desire
that shrouds a heart, beaten so black
and blue, that deep down, revolts the
idea of ever being
loved, adored, or anything but
the maiming devil it knows well.
Dec 2023 · 899
desolate
Ash Dec 2023
i grieved the fall
before i even took the leap

pulled off to the lookout
searched the vast horizon

and in the salt spray,
in every leaf and bramble
found you wanting
Dec 2023 · 908
inundated
Ash Dec 2023
oh, to be kissed
as the sun does this laquer skin
to breathe and be beautiful
effortlessly.
Nov 2023 · 526
bogeyman at the masquerade
Ash Nov 2023
what figment of me
lives in your whispers?
what shadow dances
on your crumbling walls?
Nov 2023 · 591
The Ideal
Ash Nov 2023
Our first glance was like lightning
Bright and instant, gone as fast as it came
But I knew then I'd be forever changed

Coffee dates and long dances
We were a whirlwind, falling like the rain
Outside my window on that car ride home

"Forever," our hearts whispered
We bound our eternal fates together
And at that altar, I made a promise

I'd cut through your darkest storms
Like the cutlery you got for Christmas
Two years ago, when your mother was there

And I’d remember it all
From the way every strand of your hair fell
Down to the light in your eyes on that day

"Til death do us part," we say…

But I wake, and you were an ideal
Nov 2023 · 798
Delicate
Ash Nov 2023
I dream of an eye that regales me
In all this earthly form, not with greed
But as the masterwork of God’s brush
Nov 2023 · 943
gale song
Ash Nov 2023
the wind began to warble,
and so the blackbird whispered
"my heart is not a weapon
and my love is not a game"

Nov 2023 · 901
moonstone
Ash Nov 2023
our eyes meet
and in that one moment
time seems to crystallize
every movement fractal
every last piece of me

falling
       into
  place

but I blink
and your memory fades
fast as it was dreamt of
Oct 2023 · 1.0k
I am an oak in the wind
Ash Oct 2023
Every time I have wallowed in my tears,
Every time I have drowned in my grief,
Every time I have loved and lost,
I remind myself—
It has been worse, and I have made it this far
I have made it this far
So that I can see through to better days
Sep 2023 · 878
you, despite everything
Ash Sep 2023
how do I have memories
of something I never had?
my daydreams are fanged,
years of pained flashbacks
that were never lived
Sep 2023 · 458
kintsugi
Ash Sep 2023
they wove me of delicate thread
now years-frayed and blood-stained
and even though my hands are torn
they still pull the needle, pull me back together
Sep 2023 · 1.0k
rural
Ash Sep 2023
here, all the trees are evergreen
steady amidst the bone-deep chill
for only they can pierce the sky
and root so deeply to be unmoved

oh, our beautiful iron maiden

where the gilded spikes stand tall,
steady amidst the suffering
for only they can pierce our hearts
and be unmoved by the screams
Ash Aug 2023
like catching a falling knife together
double-edged, our blood on each other’s hands
Aug 2023 · 207
Untitled
Ash Aug 2023
I’ll always be in your rear view mirror
Even when I’ve left you in the dust
Jul 2023 · 558
in every moment
Ash Jul 2023
i am an unwilling passenger
upon the vessel of time
Jul 2023 · 274
untitled
Ash Jul 2023
I only had the nerve to dream
and you, the will to shatter me
Jul 2023 · 720
defibrillate
Ash Jul 2023
they don’t believe me
they don’t believe me
they don’t believe me
they don’t believe me

maybe if I repeat it enough it will lull me into some sense of calm
it will become a fact, not a knife through my chest
Jul 2023 · 646
eleven, seventeen
Ash Jul 2023
i am so tired
of being everything
all at once
Jun 2023 · 483
chapter one
Ash Jun 2023
sometimes I listen to my old favorite songs and I think
of how those words don’t echo in my heart anymore
how the chains we shared have formed my
feathered wings,
and now I breathe, I breathe the salt air
not where we started, but where I begin
I am free.
Jun 2023 · 661
light
Ash Jun 2023
for once, I have known peace
and it has known me.
Jun 2023 · 602
theatrics
Ash Jun 2023
in my dreams, I fall upon the altar
time and time again, the dagger
piercing my heart, for you to witness me
Jun 2023 · 781
prologue
Ash Jun 2023
tapestries woven of the stars
fading into our dappled sunrise
there, your wings carry me softly—
to be my dove, or my icarus?
Jun 2023 · 729
am I dreaming or scheming
Ash Jun 2023
is it the golden threads of fate
or your puppet strings on my hand?
May 2023 · 654
untitled
Ash May 2023
I find myself looking back
holiday lights blurring,
fading into falling stars
I have a lot to think about
May 2023 · 1.0k
glean
Ash May 2023
we fell like the last rain
bookending a bone-deep chill
something to cling to, the pain
washed out from the windowsill
we both deserve better
Jan 2023 · 3.1k
appel du vide
Ash Jan 2023
one strike of that blackened match
and a million chromatic threads unwound
leaving only an ashen husk,
my timeless vessel
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