The mirror is shattered.
So without any reflection on the misuse of this image,
The shards will be incarnadine.

The bleeding will ne'er end.
It drips drops of thick sick thoughts,
Smothering the scattered shards.

A sight bred for horror.
Speckled endlessly, sorting sorrows
Into uniquely spattered shards.

The fulmination of self-imitation.
No longer are little words taken lightly.
You are now obscure shards.

I, too, once saw clearly.

Needless to say
I'm a disaster.
Peaceful breathing
Next to my
Endless seething
About the constant feelings
That confuse me
And enslave me
And ravage me
And leave me craving an escape.
Your peaceful breathing
How it ever so slowly calms my raving mind.
I can't sleep.
You're lying next to me and I am
Helpless, needy, and hurt.
Helpless - though your attempts to calm me are caring and sweet, I can't help you sleep by staying awake.
Needy - I desire your company at 3AM when the world should be silent and yet here I sit wanting your attention.
Hurt - I can't hurt myself anymore than to know I am hurting you.
I love you.
I lie here and weep.
I need what you have,
Your peaceful sleep.

Sometimes I just want to see another way of being me
Another way of being free of all insecurity
But there are times when that is hard
And there are wounds that have been scarred
And now I'm trying to get by with what in my life has been marred.

I keep trying to escape all of the lies that cover my eyes like tape; such a disguise, I can let out only sighs.  
It's hiding all of my fears deep inside all of my tears that never flow, I don't let them go, so I keep moving, I reap what I sow.
So no, I'm not fine, I walk a fine line between peace and what is at least my foreseeable destruction.
And I know I'm laughing and requesting you leave it alone but what is worse is the curse of knowing I am and will always be unknown.

All weight will drop off my shoulders, but before, it gets much colder,
So cover me in this vacancy of emotion and make me bolder.
Make me able to stand under the pressure of the hand that smacks my hand and tells me "Man, it's just a phase." which does the opposite of
Raising me up and making me new, so if you only knew that what you do makes me rue the so-called man that I've become and now
The future man that I will be will never rise up from his knee
So I'm left stirring in this mind of never-ending insecurity.

I walk
Nightly
To the place where I find
Silence.
Silencing the world
Silencing the mind
Silencing all that creates
Havoc.
I create havoc.
Day after day
I walk
Wondering when I will
Finally
Be able to find that
Silence.
But day after day I am
Silenced.
That is why
Nightly
I walk
To the place where I find
Silence.
To the River
Where drowns the havoc
Around me.
Where flow the souls of the silent.
To the River
Where I find
Silence.

I used to think there was a common lure,
A common attraction to the love we built.
But every relationship begins to crumble
As now we are.

If I could simply explain that all of your
Words cut me. All of your flowered colors wilt.
But I simply cannot and I fall into mumble
As now we are.

What was clear between us begins to blur.
There is grey area, no clear sign is felt.
But how is it we never used to stumble
As now we are.

You were impossible to blame
And as was I.
But the Moor left life due to outwardly shame

And the lure into our deceit was too great
And what we had built no longer held meaning
And the stumble was hardened by the foundation
And it was no more,
As now we are.

If dreamed any harder
Vivid light would fade away
Under the ecstasy of color
That would illuminate the day

Quickly come
Harshly rushing in
Flurries of inklings
Blow in through my pen

Slowly come
The unique flakes I know
Wisp around in my head
Creating drifts of snow

Forever come
These blizzards, suffice
Enticing my hand
To form sculptures of ice.

Never ending in my head
Notes I love and simultaneously dread
Dancing from ears to mind to tongue
Leaving not a single song unsung

Around and 'round the classy tune
Convinced I am the happiest loon
By this art that does consume me
Playing my heartstrings constantly

There quiet you lay
Body cold as wintered day
Hurting in silence
Subject to violence
Waiting for the coming of May.

The time is too late
Flee from me hate
I now open the gate
The time is too late

It's already begun
Radiant is the sun
I now cease to run
It's already begun

Dishearten my fear
Falls not my tear
For you, my dear,
Dishearten my fear