On your shoulder stands a monster
Name is insecurity
Grotesque green-eyed gargoyle
Subverting surroundings you see

My heart an antique treasure
Covered in dross and dust
Every afternoon bricks wedged between
Barrier built by broken trust

In haste to label me a villain
Strengths overlooked without a second glance
Few foolish mistakes I may have made
We will never succeed if you don't give us the chance

There's plenty space for us to grow
Turn over a new leaf
Full of abundant paranoia
No room in skull for belief

I cannot take anymore upheaval
Over and over again a skipping track
Interrogation ripping flesh
Infinite questions break back

On map I illustrate details
Appeasing you is tough
Doesn't matter how accurate my statements
Efforts seem to not ever be enough

I feel indignity
Gently caressing insight
Embracing like a family member
Not afraid of standing up for what's right

So very tired of being pegged as the bad guy
I take cover from insinuations
In a brave moment of futility
Kick the door in to house of expectations

I dance in entryway like the whole world is blind
Until I collapse because you make it so hard
Each invalid word flung my direction
Slowly wriggles through thought's guard

It comes together
Pieces of a mechanism
Dismembering my self-esteem
Out of nowhere insults are thrown my way
Rage rises in me like steam

My voices speak brutal tones
Echoing deeply within brain
Sometimes can't tell if my demons are lying
Till morning sheds light on what's sane

Sleeping dogs won't keep eyes closed
I'm turned upside down
I can't help but crawl back to your arms
When day shifts perception around

Every which way emotions are conflicted
Rest when you realize you are wrong
Leaving me alone in peace for awhile
Until next episode comes along

Till my fatigued legs are forced to start running
Miles to showa the light
Fly to a place with less distress
Pinky promise we will be alright

And wait for you to come to your senses
Whether noon or months from now
Playing out scene however it unfolds
In future like a garden we will bloom somehow

In jungle of life where so many are ruthless
Are the only man who catches my eye
Contrary to what imagination might assume
Have no inclination or need to glance at another guy

I told you before and I'll say it again
Simply not that kind of girl
Fact that you would even entertain that notion
Truthfully makes me want to hurl

We have faced fair share of challenges
I'm sure there are more to come
If you want me to be better try building my confidence
Instead of opposite like calling me dumb

Why does it look like you create obstacles?
If let be the path would remain clear
You search so persistently for problems
Eventually they are bound to appear

Making mountains of molehills
Just wish for you to appreciate what you've got
May never have as much to offer as you
I give you my love and that's a lot

I'm left wondering where things went wrong
Striving to present my best
Will you notice what's so obvious to me?
Despite our issues we both are blessed

Think if eyes were truly open
Have nothing but faith in me
Loyalty and devotion are screaming at top volume
You are too focused on my shortcomings to see

It's twelve something in the morning
A vague block of time past
The empty celebration
I meander outside
Hopelessly alone,
Just me and a cigarette
And when it burns out,
No longer lit
I'll then yell and scream
Louder than I can
Untill my voice gives up on me too
Finally leaving me
And I can no longer
Even call upon a whisper
As I make the biggest decision of my life...
...at least up to this point...
To go solo for what's left of this venture
Where I hope to discover
Me
The entity
That I've heard called Jeremy

©2025

Later,
When I drop the ball
Do me a favor,
Stand over there
As I teeter
Between take it or give it all
And "why even bother?"
I've made the call,
No answer
So forever I will fall
Screaming into the ether

©2024

The wind screamed outside
And yet I wasn't afraid
I engaged and took the ride
Accepting the path that it made
It lead me out of my own mind
It was beautiful, I danced and I played
But I returned terrified
Because it looks like I could fall on my own blade

©2024

You and I will most likely be gone as there'll be hardly anyone else around
without a building left standing, to be seen, anywhere near on the ground.
There'll be chaos and destruction wherever one may happen to look about
with the screams of women and children heard from afar in pain no doubt.
The voices of men crying together with words mumbled in resignation
addressed to a deity that had been forsaken long ago in condemnation.
Days of the future foretold now are passing under cover of a blackened sky
with the smell of smoke and ashes slowly rising from the ground to pry.
The earth as it has been known in people's memories now exists no more
and former things of beauty loved been shattered to pieces on the shore.
Hopelessness and helplessness are words to express the current situation
with no effort on anyone's part to make amends in a general desperation.
The howling of many dogs and other creatures can also be heard as well
with the sound of rolling thunder fading in the distance is a story to tell.
Flashes of lightning seen in the clouds above add a surreal touch to be
made out or viewed like it's doomsday come at last for those left to see.
With the earth itself trembling from all the current devastation around
there's no one to speak words of comfort to subdue the noise profound.
Like a worst case scenario the images will be etched in the hearts 'n minds
of all those who've remained alive, in one piece, the way that true guilt binds.
__________