maybe i'm missing out on something
but i can't seem to associate myself with these characters
who have fallen in and out of love
i feel like an unwritten persona who's buried underneath
all of these repetitive girls shown on screen
i read books to search for truth and meaning
maybe something a little more realistic
but i find myself speaking such words like
"who am i really?"
i try to search for that one person
to prove if there are things as meant to be's
but it feels as if i'm looking at the wrong directions
or maybe i haven't even started searching to begin with
so here's to everyone who's ever felt lonely
and can't put themselves in their shoes
here's to unrelatable first kisses
and missed opportunities,
secluded activities and muttered words
you and i are worth more than wasted virginities,
frustrating in betweens and cluttered beings
we are made separately for reasons
that make us question our existence
our worth surpasses those of fairy tales
and unrealistic love stories
we are definitions of life itself
we are our own characters
who seek for unconventional journeys
and unscripted settings
maybe we won't fall in love today or tomorrow
or the weeks to come
maybe we will stop to consider that what we have
is not equivalent to heartfelt experiences
maybe we look for something more profound and complex
a cathartic release worth feeling
maybe we are lost at the thought of love
and can't seem to find our way back into it
what i know for sure is that
i am not that girl you will hear from books
i am nothing like them nor the movies
that everyone's gullible enough to believe in
and so are you
we are what's unique and true
and no one can force us to fall in love
no one can tell us when or where
because they will never have the privilege,
to compile and secure mediocre scenes
we will eventually fall into place with our own stories
but i guess for now we're just missing out

n.j.

You were as turbulent as the wind as you raised my wings to the sky.
Star bound willingly.
Magnetic, electric, profound.
So drawn by pulse and plasma.
Unwavering beauty in chaos.