Sometimes,
when the face in the mirror isn't who I want it to be

and those thoughts,
those ******* disgusting worms crawling out of my brain,
to simply drive me insane

I think it's subconscious,
I never quite think it,
before the thought is reaching my hand

A little mascara
brush through my hair

(I want to feel pretty
again)

A dusting of powder
touch up my chapstick

(this face
THIS FACE ISN'T RIGHT
THIS ISN'T THE PERSON I WANT  TO BE-)

-
It's ok to be.
-

Switch up the perspective:


I Will fix my issues,
one brush at a time

A swipe of lipstick
layer eyeshadow

Please don't clump, mascara
Add some concealer

(I NEED TO FIX
THE VOICES IN MY HEAD)

Some brow gel
Some eyeliner.

Top it off
With a



[[I hear voices say,
voices far away
"say cheese!" click]]


I-
I'll be O.K.

If every person
comes into my life
for a reason then
Does every person
leave my life
for a reason?

I
Whether inner or outer, the matter is naught
Many sought after what cannot be bought
Though heart and mind is where it all lies
An impeccable vision beyond your mere eyes.
  
The signature mark of human kind
Dream and reality all intertwined
Cold as ice, hot as raw fire
Grand aesthetic for all to admire –

Seldom achieved, unable to build
Quenches all thirst, all hungers fulfilled
With all imperfections, itself so flawless
Rules are negated; thus, it remains lawless

Greatest of weapons bound by no defence
For it may be subtle, yet so intense
Partnered with love, a potent ideal
Beauty will call, no need to conceal.

II
Silence lay steadily against the barren walls
Aging wood, icy stone
An empty carcass rotting away
Unable to feel or be felt
                        Allowing nothing in or out
Though a poison seeps within its walls
Changing it, from what it was once before
Now wearing a mask as if to disguise,
                   The unseen horrors lurking inside
Goblins and ghouls are the least of your worry
For what lies inside is far more heinous
Beauty’s opposition, readily awaits
No longer a guise hiding the truth -
Reality is met with eager eyes
A stammering figure soundlessly screaming  
Hauling chains and a mirror of lies,
Though not evil, a choice in itself
                   Ugliness within can often be mended.

Just don't think about those people
Who have left you with no choice
But to think the reason of your aloneness.

Just don't hover around,
Those,
Making you feel unworthy,
Shut their door,
And don't worry dear,
It isn't ego,
It's self-respect,
Self-help,
Self esteem and
Self-love.

Just don't be with those,
Bragging about their victory,
By belittling your tiny beginnings,
And don't worry dear,
It isn't that you aren't worthy,
But the person is so unworthy
To witness your
Victory by stepping tiny it's.

Do I know
Who I am on my own
Before I've met
Any other I have known?

I ask do you care
error 404 (page not found)
I knew this before
You ruined me to the core

Every way, each day
I am present to see it.
His miracle of being
I the recipient his gift
Awestruck, humbled, blessed
This I understand completely
Though I know not how, or why
I.  This man I still learn to know
As myself, of my self,
Admit having witness his growing
In great measure do I envy him
See his approach at living, being
embodying the kindest soul,
Naturally thoughtful and caring
How he is, has become
A lesson that I do learn from
My little legacy, so far beyond
better than from which he comes
I worry for him as fathers must
But not of him, of life's unexpected
always haunting every person
just out of foretelling, behind any horizon
For this treasure of my life I know
No doubt, to be a person of light
Wits, genuine smiles, listening and learning
His my Son, He is my Hero
I am out done, and yet,
ever the more thankful.
Blessed by You Zieven Lee.
Thank You.  More than you'll ever know.

If you love someone you suffer in silence

Want someone you care for to live free of the pain that is harming you

Close in walls to keep them safe from your fires

Life is then never given the chance to twist them the way it twisted you

Let that person stay out of danger's way
They are better off lightyears away