Glancing
Heart pounding
Thoughts racing
Love.
Prolonged eye gazing
Holding hands
Kissing
Dancing through tulips
Going on dates
Love.
Getting married
Having a family
Growing old
Dying
Love.

I stand at the window,
Watching the landscape around me change.
I think of you
And the way your presence has changed the landscape of my life.
With every white flake that falls from the sky
It reminds me of how much I miss you.
And how much I need you.

I long for your touch,
As so many long for the spring time.
The spring time with it's flower buds,
And the new life we cling to for survival.
The new life that brings us the hope of a second chance
To start afresh.

But the winter winds keep me dreaming.
Dreaming of you.
Dreaming of a future.
Dreaming of surviving this hell they call life.
Because I don't want to die.
But I don't want to live without you either.

And now that you've left me
I'm lost for words.
I don't know what to tell people
Or how I should reply when they ask me how you are.
I can't possibly tell them the truth.
Oh how I hate the way you treated me,
But oh how I miss you.

And the winter winds keep me thinking.
Thinking of you.
Thinking of a future.
Thinking of escaping this hell they call life.
Because now I want to die,
But I know can't leave what few friends I have left.

Just lying awake at night
I can't help but think of you.
I wish you hadn't left me,
Although I suppose it was inevitable.
After all who could ever love me?
My biggest mistake
Was ever believing you did.

2 months and 15 days.
That's how long it's been
Since I heard your voice.
I miss it.
I miss its velvety tone.
I miss your accent.
I miss being able to tell you everything

I would do anything,
Anything at all,
Just to go back to how things were.

But the winter winds remind me
That that can't happen.
Even if you could love me again,
I couldn't be with you,
Because my heart can't bare
To be broken yet again.
It's been shattered
One too many times.

So don't come back for me
And don't come back at all.
For I can barely stand to hear your name
Never mind your voice.
Maybe in time I'll move on,
And maybe my heart will heal,
But until then just don't.
Don't even think about
Coming back to me.
My heart cannot take it.

Hey! You!
Follow Your Path
Frost had it right when he “Took the road less traveled by”
But when is that easy?
Because frankly the road I’m going down has been traveled by many
At this day in age I’m not sure there is a road not traveled

Roads have been paved and concreted to the city
Made by technology and not withered by experience
I would love to take the road less traveled by
But instead I think I’ll take to the sky
Because these roads are cluttered with traffic
And too slow moving
For my fast-paced decade
So I think I’ll traveling by plane

I believe a great man name “Doc” once said, “where we’re going, we don’t need roads.”
That’s right I don’t need roads
Because I’m done following the path paved and named for me
I’m done with society not viewing the world the way I see
I’m done with the insecurities
I will not be told
I’m not pretty enough
Smart enough
Involved enough
I’m not tall enough
I’m not old enough

I determine my life not you
I will not wait at the stoplight
I will no longer wish for the green to last
Because the sky is limit
I will not wait another minute

This advice is not only to me but to you
Fly with me
Be clueless with me
We will make the sky our kingdom
Give ourselves absolute freedom
Do go down the path we please
Because we choose our destinies
Just think of the endless possibilities
I am sick of the need to perpetually people please not praiseworthy persons who are passively prejudice of my personal path
Please, swallow your pride
We don’t need roads
And we don’t need to deal with stop signs
We just need to mind the birds

when i was younger my parents
warned  me about the kinds of drugs you could snort
into your system through your gentle little nose,

the kind you drink like alcohol
and the ones you inject straight into your
veins.

but the one thing they forgot to warn me about
were drugs like you.

A ghost lives in my mind
He haunts me at night, when its dark
The ghost consumes my thoughts
Like it's his last meal
He forms goosebumps on my skin
He burns me with thoughts I otherwise couldn't
build on my own he takes responsibility of the actions
I am to a coward to admit to
He kills the begonia flowers growing inside my ribcage
And searches for the ghost of my former self in the space between my left and right lung
He is lost but he isn't trapped
He has an option to leave but he chooses to stay
And builds a cemetery inside my head.

Words pound against my skull

      Let me out

They say
    
       Write me down

They want to show off
just how prettily they've bunched themselves up to form sentences
Each one, perfectly completing the other
How do you do it ?

"They" say

Well,
I don't
No matter what I do or say I can't control this
Everywhere I look
Everything I see touch or smell
These words appear and carefully dance onto my paper or sometimes my thumbs run frantically over the small keys on my phone ..
And when there gone
There gone.
But that's okay
I keep them safe