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Nov 2021 · 355
the world aside
kell Nov 2021
Im trying to forgive
Feb 2021 · 240
insignificant
kell Feb 2021
He sat under the stars, his eyes glowed as he told me how big the universe is and how insignificant we are.
How he wished he could be like a star, something that lasts forever and starts deep meaningful conversations
I wanted to tell him that he is my star
He made me stop and forget the insignificance of my existence
and how every word he spoke made me want to listen deeper.
That even if he isn’t a necessity to the universe, he gave me a reason to forgive the world, because no matter how evil the world is, it must be good for it inhabits him.
I want him to see me and think
“this is all i need”
Nov 2020 · 202
family
kell Nov 2020
As a family
As a family we stand,
together we fall.

We lose one,
we lose them all.
Oct 2019 · 412
life
kell Oct 2019
Im nauseated from the ups and downs
I get so low I forget what its like to breathe,
drowning by my crys and screams
I get so high that its seems I have a perfect life
I wish I could be in a time loop of this night
When it rains is poors when its sunny it burns
I appreciate the highs more every low I get
Life is like Russian roulette
You could be here one second go the next
life isnt promised the only thing promised is death
so appreciate life with all its highs and lows
your pain and hurt might never go away
but your here right now so try to live through the pain.
Every person has issues even if you believe yours are worse hurting and pain is felt the same. live right now
Oct 2019 · 291
romeo and juliet
kell Oct 2019
Forbidden love is to meet this day
to wipe a family's history and pain
A love, hate twisted Hurricane
No war can keep them apart
for they feel there love was crafted as beautiful art
They told there love from there lips
forever sealing there dying wish
to come together as one
love stronger than their families hate
love stronger than the oceans waves
from first sight and to there last
but hush for there families can not know
that adversarys joined
a sword against their neck
the only choice in this love is death
love like that is so powerful..

also im releasing my hidden poems so enjoy
Oct 2019 · 224
live
kell Oct 2019
what is it ?
The mere thought of happiness that rushes through our veins,
When we see someone we love, our crush, our family, the sunshine,
If those were to fade away, a part of us would simply shatter, vanish,
Rain clouds would keep away the sunshine in our life the heavy wind would brush through our hair and remind us of such great tragedies,
like a sleeping terror, the chains of fate, the flow of time become;
Meaningless, without what has been blown away like ash by a breeze,
What you must not forget, will never lose, what wont change is...
The past, where your memories, our remarkable actions are living,
Hold them dear, these several rays of sunlight to keep the rain clouds away, to pull yourself together and shine beyond the scene, rise.
Even if you do lose all your strength and your muscles refuse to carry your beautiful soul trapped within the flesh of your very existence,
Even if you fall into an abyss of despair, devoured by regret.
As long as you are alive, you may as well do a change.
As long as you are alive, you can make the present joyous by striving for a better future, for yourself, for what you lost.
Live, for the love of light is for all to bare
be alive when your dead inside
Oct 2019 · 380
lethal feelings
kell Oct 2019
I felt a lot
Not just my own emotions I endured others as well
I was gifted with
empathy, pain.
painful at the least
Oct 2019 · 146
anxiety
kell Oct 2019
i told it to leave
its like a second personality
it comes when it wants and leaves when it pleases
i have no control, it just suffocates me
quickens my heart makes it hard to breathe
im so ******* tired of this anxiety
It sends pain in my chest and tears down my face
dont even ask me whats wrong, i wont know what to say
im wore out and hurt
but it dousnt care about me. it dousnt care for anybody
Sep 2019 · 147
typical
kell Sep 2019
She thrived of adventure .
her whole mindset was focused on getting out of this worn out town filled with people that only care about their well being,
she had new intentions she wanted to change the world.
She wanted to make something more,
she felt as if the people she surrounded herself with were a cover up to who she really was.
She felt none of them new or understand her vivid thoughts,
that go beyond any letter grade typed on paper,
her thoughts that struggled to understand the real meaning of life's status.
We choose to change ourselves to feel good that there's people like us
. no one is like you.
Even if you change everything every little detail deep down you're still you.
Stop hiding it.
We fall into peer pressure for we don't think the weight of 20 people is pressure,
we fall for these simple words that challenge for we forget the consequences,
we rebel without cause because the thrill is exhilarating
for the poison that pumps through our veins is our energy
, and the tangy liquid we drink is an excuse for the words that tumble effortlessly out of our mouths
but were still sober enough not to show who we are.
we brag about  the ignorant actions because people praise us for it, people envy us.
just the highlights
she is me
Sep 2019 · 416
Voicemail
kell Sep 2019
It’s been a while since I heard from you
Going crazy knowing i'm losing you
And your doing just fine
Not a day passes by without you on my mind
I wish to hear the same, but you already got a new partner in crime.
I know it's not right but you invade my mind every night
******* with my continuous it's a constant fight
I feel like it was all just a waste of time
All the screaming and fighting just to break down and cry.
Then we go back again ignoring what we said
Letting the open wound bleed.
Opening my eyes are love wasn't love it was greed
So selfish for each other we couldn't see
It was all pain it was all need.
So easily confused with lust, no it was intemperate.
:'( little tear shed on this
Sep 2019 · 169
Solitude
kell Sep 2019
I will spend an eternity alone
because I cant keep one person I like let alone love.
They always leave, without hesitation
without a single taste of there goodbye
I can assume they believe it must hurt less
to there displeasure, it pains me a lot more not to know why.
maybe I was meant to be this way by oneself;
always dreaming of a relationship that can feed my hunger
for being loved or liked or just some kind of sign Im needed
Im exhausted, wore out from being repeatedly left behind
Im slowly coming to acceptance
Im not for anyone and no one is for me
i cant do it again
Sep 2019 · 460
providence ♥
kell Sep 2019
I   have  no  doubt  that  
everything  happens  for  a  reason
for  all  the  grief  and  suffering
bliss  and  beauty  may  follow  
not when  you  expect  or  need  it
but  when  you  appreciate
the  other  the  most

B   E ~  P  A  T   I   E  N  T
Your simply in the time in between
Sep 2019 · 573
Imagine
kell Sep 2019
listen, look around for a second

for you too

are a slave to society

Your phone keeps you distracted from the world

Are you there?

no...

Your more enveloped by a screen than relationships

wake up please before it takes us completely

we might be the most connected

but not with emotions we're all alone  

disconnected from ourselves

why do you think you feel so lost?

Its because you are

stuck in a virtual world

imagine a world
with
Real connections
wifi to relationships
Sep 2019 · 242
No more us
kell Sep 2019
There was a time before us


and there will be a time after us


its inevitable


Sleep good tonight
universe
Sep 2019 · 579
broke
kell Sep 2019
I broke I let go Not like I could control it
it just happened my breathing quickened my heart sped up my mind was buzzing and tears came uncontrollably
I held them in too long, my feelings they're coming out
violently, destructively, and with out notice.
Im a prisoner of my own contentious now
Every cruel word becomes more true the more i say it.
but i dont care. its about time I lost it
it was bound to happen at some point
Im oddly thrilled, excited to destroy myself.
Its exhilarating the way my body goes fully numb afterwords
My daily Novocaine the calm after the storm
yes, i find my pain beautiful in a way i cant fully explain
dont feel its not really there. it wont ever go away.
I smiled with tears running down my face when wrote this.
kell Sep 2019
love is the only never ending
continuum
that transcends space and time
is reborn every love you share
older than your very existence
deeper than the trenches of this word
and everlasting to every generation
expressed beautifully and treacherously
to fit every individual
Love runs out space
Sep 2019 · 478
Breathe
kell Sep 2019
He yells, all the spiteful words
to remind me that my life is his possession
giving my existence no value.
Emotions invade my head
A painful sensation sets through me
so painful to hold them back
these tears
I breathe in then out gradually
being sure he doesn't hear my attempt
to prevent these threatening tears from running effortlessly down my face
to avoid him knowing he effects me this way
yet he does, its agonizing
distasteful so simply to the sound of his voice
waves of painful threats. waves of sadness and hate
I have to breathe, dont you dare not for one second
let him see the misery youre in
smirk and smile youll be over it in awhile
3 seconds in
hold 3 seconds
breathe out
Sep 2019 · 701
who are you?
kell Sep 2019
You feel like your a burden
your mind is over taking by these thoughts
you don't appertain
disconnected from the world
like a plug from its outlet
no longer in use
useless at the least
priceless to those who don't see
who you really are..
who are you really?
Your acting we can all tell its so impostress and fake
like a bad spell
whose fault is it the wisher or the witch?
We want you raw, vulnerable, authentic
and true to who you are
This is the alternate you
we hear your screams inside your own mind
"this isn't me why am i acting this way"
save me please, im adrift from myself. the actual me

Your beautiful,you belong,you have an understanding beyond your years keep your head clear you got this

to my lovely friend
BE yourself please its OK there someone for you
Sep 2019 · 177
strangers
kell Sep 2019
The train came to a halt
  I got off it was the final stop
no more room for me I was empty and useless and no good for society.
but when I got off others did too. They pleaded that I bring back what I once had i cannot i stepped off the train for some kind of acceptance I was on my knees for people who didn't know me
and yes I was begging for them to show affection
They are strangers, not friends not family but there criticism seemed more important to me. its what the people want
not me
To creators influencers and your everyday social out cast
Sep 2019 · 8.8k
<3
kell Sep 2019
<3
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.
-max
my favorite poem
Sep 2019 · 263
teenage trash
kell Sep 2019
Dejected. Rejected. Not respected.
teenage trash

Glazed sad eyes
slurring words, not alive
stumbling, crying, dead inside
empty souls, empty lies
pointless, worthless,
not empathized
motivated by cash
teenage trash
hey been awhile
kell May 2019
Clean cut and pristine, be what they want you to be
why dont you see?
if you follow their rules and regulations theyll never push you away
youll never be alone,never in pain, you'll be so happy my dear
dont be yourself youre hideous inside and out.
follow the leader its the best game to play
follow those perfect girls with there perfect ways in a perfect house
on the beach with the oceans waves.

D O N T   Y O U   W A N T  THAT?
  
No... I want my messy life and crazy hair with an okay house with breathable air with friends that know the real me and truly care,
I want an imperfect love and out of ordinary family
somthing real is more appealing then palm trees and fake weaves
I want to see the raw beutiful world no fake,plasterd on a tv.
beauty is what is right infront of me.
and i wont change
not for money,houses, cars, or fame
This is me a reckless beutiful mess
and im PERFECTLY fine with that.
use your pain for power
Mar 2019 · 417
gen-er-rat-ion
kell Mar 2019
Our generation will be known for nothing.
Never will anybody say,
We were the peak of mankind.
That is wrong, the truth is
Our generation was a failure.
Thinking that
We actually succeeded
Is a waste. And we know
Living only for money and power
Is the way to go.
Being loving, respectful, and kind
Is a dumb thing to do.
Forgetting about that time,
Will not be easy, but we will try.
Changing our world for the better
Is something we never did.
Giving up
Was how we handled our problems.
Working hard
Was a joke.
We knew that
People thought we couldn’t come back
That might be true,
Unless we turn things around
(now read from bottom up)
love generation hurt 54
Dec 2018 · 299
salt and sugar
kell Dec 2018
Sunflowers reach,
Up to the skies,
My experience is sad,
And so are your eyes
A spirit is evil,
And so is your smile.
don't you leave
stay for awhile.
pain
Dec 2018 · 422
Writers-Block
kell Dec 2018
My creativity is haltered,
i'm stuck on a continuous train
I could stop if my brain would kick in and find a exit or a object to throw in front of it
but its stuck moving,thoughts over thoughts thrown away down they go, down the drain.
I don't even think twice I know its not good enough for them I ask why, why isn't it good enough for them?
i'm running low on fuel, im drained and my creativity is on the floor stomped all over by people I don't know,
I scream for them to stop,
The train came to a halt
  I got off it was the final stop no more room for me I was empty and useless and no good for society.
but when I got off others did too. They pleaded that I bring back what I once had i cannot i stopped the train for some kind of acceptance I was on my knees for people who didn't know me
and yes I was begging for them to show affection
They are strangers, not friends not family but there criticism seemed more important to me. its what the people want
not me.
Were forever stuck on the train of
thought.
Nov 2018 · 548
Jealousy
kell Nov 2018
My Jealousy, you inspire me to write.
I hate the way you reach, walk and shiver,
Invading my mind day and through the night.

Brittle, weak I don't want to be but its me
hurts emotionally. In my chest it aches and tears down my self
esteem.

I want to be someone else not me.
Oh my jealousy,It's degrading and hurtful.
It has an evil mind
And a sad smile, furthermore
It lingers, I feel frightened.
from the soul
Nov 2018 · 295
Sterotyped
kell Nov 2018
Put into categories like objects
without any intellect
Forced into character
like a play
that's hell to pay
locked behind bars
like a cell
till its over
like a hangover
was it worth it
I dont know
Aug 2018 · 4.2k
miss-understood
kell Aug 2018
Every person sees from a different angle
Every event leading up to how they perceive how they think and there endless thoughts
What they love and what they do not how they see themselves or just all the flaws
who they are is deeper than a
conversation or what you see,  
They're so aware of something that's not there
So their cuts never close they always bleed
And who they are comes to surface someone they never thought they would be
It's funny, right when you let go
The more you want to breathe
So misunderstood an addiction to acceptance can never be relieved
No one understands anyone
It's just how it is
And how it will forever be
Inspired by a friend

luke
May 2018 · 1.1k
Fear
kell May 2018
Why fear something so close so near
something inevitable
Is it where we'll go that scares you?
Is it how you'll leave?

What irony that we fear eternal darkness and sleep
but we seemed so deprived of these things
A wilting rose rested at your tomb,
A soft melody drifts in the wind

As you lay dreadfully wasting
away
people remember the words they say
Rest in peace
how could we not?
Were forever stuck on the train of
thought.
Dont fear death just live...
May 2018 · 492
The streets
kell May 2018
A generation mistook as ignorant
but withholds great knowledge  
as they grew up on the streets
they learned that life is easier took
than given.

Gunshots are the only symphony they hear
they stray away from the compelling noise
wishing they could disappear.

Choking on the lethal gas that fills the atmosphere
sheltering under a bridge, for no one truly cares
be stealthy be smart,
on the streets, you never know
whats lurking in the dark.
I hope this relates to some readers
May 2018 · 318
Willow tree
kell May 2018
I sat under the wispy willow tree, his head lying on my knees, I'm heartbroken in fear he will leave, walk down that dark path with no look back, for now, he is mine to tears no crying, in spite, and ignorance of the belief he is not lying, he is, and his soul is slowly dying for he knows the pain he puts me through, it hurts when the girl he loves is not you.

— The End —