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?!
David Bojay May 2017
?!
am i triggered?
or do i respond?

i...



    dunno
..
David Bojay May 2017
..
haven't been inspired to write

to love is to die everyday, just a little

melt between her fingers

in her desire to see you beyond this moment

certainty in her eyes

i will hold you until my hands fall off
David Bojay Jul 2014
If you only knew.
David Bojay Apr 2014
i questioned myself and then went back to sleep,


the cycle repeated for months, i knew answers weren't going to show up magically,

i knew i was going back to sleep in the lowest of feelings

emotions splattered on my pillow; tears

i knew to never know what i wanted to know about,
the secrets to a bitter reality that i didnt know the answers to

i learned i had just to make peace with myself and my decisions

i learned to be patient with my nightmares,

even if they consisted the end of the world,
i made peace with the lava chasing me down while i was running down the mountain,

i learned how to accept reality by just accepting mysely

so i gave myself a chance,

to live, again, again, and again
when the world decided to bring me to my knees
David Bojay Nov 2017
browsing through my time//
neglecting moments that could've been mine//

(but that's all in my head)

can't mind what derives from the voices that want me dead//
"I love you", I should've said//

(it's always better to accept)

paint my emotions or lay in bed?//
can't no longer dread when there's so much ahead//

it's all beyond "me", rather feel gold than the lead pointed at my head//
David Bojay Aug 2014
Why make memories when I'll want to erase them sooner or later
Nothing last forever even if I believed in it
And if pride got in the way of things, I'd rather not be proud of anything
There's days where my random thoughts come crashing down on me like sediments hitting the ground in a valley
A "stay with me" isn't so sure, but I can't ask for the impossible
I can only be sure of death, or a "goodbye" with an empty bottle pills in my hand
I never really got how I started seeing myself in the mirror without feeling anything
Sometimes I feel the need for my face to be seen in the streets even though people don't know it
I share and I lose, and that's why I feel as I go and think of it as a first time
I'll talk about what happened and what will never happen, but that's just me
I don't have much to say tonight, be good
tired
David Bojay Nov 2018
flowers left unseen
even if my prescense is unseen
i wonder for the reasons to bleed
to think of all there is to see
to know the unlimitedness of it all

back here again
before work
to write in skeptical delight
to know and hold my ground tight
the grip doesn't soften

awaiting for my shift to start
gather myself in my car
reflecting on today and the hw left undone
i dont' get this **** for ****

one day, it'll come together
without the people of today

and the thoughts that followed

out of my way
you ponder in my doubts to portray
a side of me that never wins a game
David Bojay Feb 2019
Try to stay away
Silence I can’t remain
Forget the language we created
The moments ever lasted
When you cross my mind, why don’t you say hi?
Carry on
Even in the cold
Head held bold
Even buried under a million stones
I shall shine through the cracks
Daily tunes
Tormenting blues
(Lots to feel) Covered in different shades of hue
But only feel blue
David Bojay Aug 2014
I know I ****** up too many times to count on my hands.
This isn't poetry, it's the truth.
There's fiction to most of my poetry just to add a little spark to it.
And I know you wont believe a word I write for you anymore, but as long as I know I mean them, I'll be fine.
I'm done walking the streets with the pride I had, you were my pride.
I just hope we meet again, and start all over once and for all.
Your perfection made me nervous, your smile made me feel so lucky to even be with you, and if you didn't know that, I had to be doing something wrong.
I think I'm done trying to be something I hope to make profit out of.
I think I just want to be yours and to be wrapped in your loyal love.
I wish I could take back everything I made you feel, when from the beginning I wanted to make you feel like the princess that you are.
Your worth can't be defined in my poems even if I wrote about how beautiful you are for a million years.
I want you, maybe I even need you.
I regret making you feel worthless, baby you know your worth cant be defined with all the flattering words in the dictionary.
You saved me from the nights I didn't tell you I felt like ending it, I don't I'd be here if it wasn't for you.
I have 1 dream, and I'm chasing you, hopefully my legs can last.
I will never stop running if it's for you.
So please don't stop me, because I'm trying to stay strong.
wrote this while listening to the girl by city and colour
David Bojay Jan 2019
Lullaby playing
I can only think things I shouldn't be saying
Like the loss of you that is driving me insane
Alone in the room that was meant for me and you
Never been so distanced from the truth
It was you, the one that made it seem like this experience was eternal youth

(troubled, will you be back soon?)

.....it's this moment that I wish I was immune from this doom that said I couldn't make it past the afternoon

I'm here now

1:30 pm.... a little bit passed afternoon
David Bojay Jan 2014
People have different definitions of joy, and I can honestly to say that you are my joy.
I’ve never been so proud of my joy.
With everything that goes wrong in the world, there’s always the sun shining in the dark.
When I think of the sun enlightening people’s souls, I think of you making everything easier for me.
I feel cold at this moment, and it’s not the weather.
I could be outside naked, it could 0 degrees, and I still wouldn’t feel this cold.
I want to be your first and last kiss.
I want to be your everything.
Everything that makes me happy, I share to my world.
I share to you in other words.
My world is filled with soft green grass and the idea of it makes me tremble.
The tears of tonight will remain until the day you comeback.
I wonder what you’re doing right now, its 7:49 pm, and I’ll probably do things in between while typing this.
I hope you’ll still wake up and think to yourself that I’m yours, because I am.
And I’ll be yours until the sun doesn’t give out light anymore.
I’ll still wake up with hope, because you’re in my soul, my heart, and mind.
You’re my hope.
I’m sorry if you get teary.
If so, my intentions are only to make you happy.
Like always, everything for you that I do is to make you happy.
Even if I’m not there with you, I hope I’m in your soul, heart, and mind.
I know nothing will ever change between us, a few weeks from now we’ll be laughing, hugging, and kissing.
I’ll be taking you flowers to your doorstep, and I’ll be taking you out on dates.
We’ll get on train rides, and we’ll fall even more in love under the stars in Dallas.
When I heard you cry, I shattered, everything for one split second seemed impossible.
My voice started to crack and I felt like a new born baby.
I was so confused on who I was, I started to cry.
I never want to make you cry again.
The only time I want to see you cry is when I slip on that ring on our wedding day.
I’ve put so much thought into our future, the feeling when I do has never felt so right.
Never have I believe in something so true like you, I don’t need religion.
You’re all I need to believe in.
If you ever fall, I’ll be there to pick you up.
Even when I’m at my lowest, I’ll be there to pick you up.
Always remember, you’re not disappointing anybody.
I’m proud of everything you have accomplished.
I’m proud of you, and everything you have done.
There’s nothing to be disappointed about.
Trust me; I look up to you in so many ways.
You have inspired me to be the person that I am today.
I can’t improve on myself anymore.
Because you made me all that I am, and all that I ever want to be.
I’ll always be yours, and you’ll always be mine.
Even though forever doesn’t exist, it sure does seem like it with you.
Our love seems like forever.
I know you and I will walk the streets of the city holding hands.
When we’re tired of walking we’ll sit somewhere, and I’ll kiss your forehead for reassurance that I love you at that moment, and every moment that we come across.
I love you.
It’s 8:11 pm and I’m still wondering what you’re doing.
I’m wondering what you’re thinking of.
I get jealous of your guitars, because they get to be on your arms every day.
I wish I could be your guitar forever.
I haven’t eaten since 11am, and I’m not hungry.
My throat feels weird for some reason, I’m disgusted by myself.
I feel like screaming, I think my neighbors heard my scream this afternoon.
I think my walls are hurt.
I think my mouth is tired of tasting the salty taste of my tears.
I think my knuckles numb.
I feel like a clock right now, moving but going nowhere.
The hands will always wind up in the same spot.
With you I go everywhere.
You’re the portal to somewhere that doesn’t exist that is peaceful.
I know I’ll be on your mind when you wake up and you know you’ll be on mine.
You and I both know.
I hope you’re happy.
As long as I know you’re mine and I know I’m yours I’m happy.
I hope you think the same.
I will always remember the face you made when I showed you the music on my iPod.
Your eyes were filled with amazement.
If I knew what love was back then I would’ve said I fell in love with the look in your eyes.
I will always remember.
Never forget that I will always remember.
Sometimes I think how we would look like when we’re older.
Other times I think of you, and the future.
For Christmas I’ll take you on a carriage ride in Dallas.
We can kiss in the seats we’re in.
Nothing has changed; I don’t think they ever will.
Nothing has felt so real.
Nothing will ever feel this real.
When I get my car over the summer we can sneak out together and go to IHop at 3am just as you wished a while back.  
After that we’ll go to Wal-Mart and act crazy in there.
I knew it’d get to this point of satisfaction.
Even though right now we’re not at our best, we both know we will be soon.
The day I held your hand at the fair, I meant it.
That was one of the greatest days in my life because I got to spend it with all of my friends and you.
It’s 8:32 pm and I’m wondering if I’ll still be awake at 3am like I always was.
Knowing I was your boyfriend made me sleep in peace.
I won’t sleep in peace until I am again in all honesty.
The person I am at 3 am is a very bad person.
But I’ll have you to think about, so everything will be fine.
I hear the TV from my room; usually I have music on to block it out.
It’s silent in my room right now, I wonder if it is in yours too.
Whenever you feel down listen to Baby I’m yours by Artic Monkeys.
Just for reassurance that everything will be okay.
Denisse, it’s been 1,098 words and this isn’t even the introduction to what I feel.
I know there will be better days ahead, because you’ll be in my future.
It’s 8:42 pm and it’s been an hour since I’ve been sitting on this chair typing this down, thinking.
I want to listen to music, but I’m playing back things you’ve said to me in my head that has made me feel the way I feel right now.
I remember when you used a pick-up line on me in 8th grade; it was something about you wanting a picture of me and some other stuff.
I’ll never forget that.
You would wear black pants, black vans, and a white dress shirt to the concerts while every other girl would wear skirts.
During the summer we should go to concerts and start mosh pits.
During this time I’ve been typing this I’ve wanted to cry, I don’t know.
I’ll probably sleep with my Bluetooth headphones tonight and connect it to my phone that will be in the living room.
I’ll have it on shuffle; I know I’ll cry to a few songs while I think of you.
I haven’t cried in a while.
You’re worth crying for.
It’s 8:57 pm and I’m going to go shower, plus I have to put my phone up.
I hate time.
I just got out the shower, I was just standing there.
It’s 9:30 pm and I think I’m going to try to get some sleep.
I love you so much, goodnight darling, my love.
Sweet dreams.
I hope this small journey through my mind.
I’ll do this every day just so you know I haven’t forgotten about you and that I’m here.
I’ll wait for you Denisse.
I love you, peace.
David Bojay Jun 2018
when the evening dies
between morning and night
looking at the sky with no light
millions of colors in the dark sky
my vision creates fractals in the dark sky

(the story of today is written when my thoughts are away)

(my boldness is just me trying to portray what I couldn't say)

i have things to do

i have things to observe
i have things to listen to
i have drinks to pour, dinners to eat
**** to grind
coffee to brew

when my time is due, know that i'm coming for you
sweet girl
i'll be coming for you
David Bojay Jun 2015
So her hair grew long
Bit her nails nervously on the daily
and so did the memory of her lover who had left without saying anything about his farewell
All she remembers were his last words, "I want you to be happy and that's all... with or without me... you will prosper my darling"
He looked at her and his neck twisted slight to the right
beeeep....beeeep.....beeeep

and so he rest forever in a universe where they guide the lower consciousness with signs in the sky that read
"life goes on"
and so it does
and so you will prosper
You will live with misery and joy
In the end, let yourself fall into a pit of hope that one day you will see you other half in bed, naked
Forever the love is in your hands
So will her heart be on your mind
and yours on hers
The scars will heal within the love you build during the moments you wish you cherished when all goes wrong

LOOK UP


There's a star for you


and it will glow for you


Forever
David Bojay Nov 2017
what is it with men and women//
i can't seem to wrap my head around concepts meant for a specific gender//
(the wine is fine and a 5 turns into a dime)
keep my head straight//
typing in my room, it's like 8//
down it and contemplate//
tonight my fingers are dancing//
can't regret anymore//
can't think less of myself, because it's an expense I'll resent//
there's no one to impress//
no girls to undress//
no worries to prevent, because in the moment I'm prepared//
for everything that depressed me//
David Bojay Nov 2017
one day

when it all goes to ****

just remember....

what you were, and why you became this way

just remember....

you'll never be the same, even if you feel like it
David Bojay Sep 2014
How do we slowly die again and again and again?
How do we seperate from ourselves repeatedly?
Why do my tears never feel new?
They're the same every week, every few days.
Maybe my love isn't enough.
Maybe my motives are lost.
Maybe I'm letting go.
Maybe my thoughs are wandering to parts they dont belong.
When have my intentions ever been wrong?
Why do I feel so sad about us?
David Bojay Nov 2017
My days are easy

Challenges are faced, the hard part was getting over the time to spend on my passions

Everything takes time, and every passing moment I'm a little older than I was

          just

                               now
"**** this world"
is what I feel like sometimes

but helping is nice too

a person like me, with no power.... just doesn't find it within himself to litter anymore
David Bojay Nov 2017
the sun rose this morning
my mom turned 50
and the birds sing for no one
cars will continue to crash
plants will die
terrorist will terrorize

and I'll be thinking of the moms who worry about the children not coming home

teachers will "teach"
and I'll listen to what comes next

happy birthday mom
David Bojay Mar 2016
People expect too much from something that can go either way
The road splits in two
And maybe even 4 if your mind has the desire to take other routes
Nobody ever finds true love
It is built with our humanity
It is built from nature
It is built with joy
And even though I don't say many serious things
I know you don't know I know the things you never would've thought I knew
But I do, and the gift isn't given, it is lived
Before my smile, I had to walk miles in denial
I am free from that now
But I still have scars on my wrist
And I know you can barely see, but I'm free
And I know I don't make much sense to you, but that's why I write
That's why I spend hours being mindful on life
That's why I cry
That's why I smile
That's why I think about death
That's why I think about surviving
And accepting makes me fear less
Enjoying makes me neglect less
Showing enthusiasm makes me live the dreams I never seemed to reach even in my sleep
I haven't posted on this website in a while
I'm not really sorry, I just am
Literally, just am
People on Twitter won't get that part
I'm talking about Hellopoetry.com
It's 1/4 passed 12
And this is me trying to write poetry
Don't tell me what you think of this poem
Just read
And go on with the life that was given to you
This
Is
Bitter
Honesty
David Bojay Jan 2019
(hard to love myself when I found myself in you)

Wondering if I’ll go to hell
In my thoughts will I dwell

A beginning
Empty

been trying to sleep since 8:50
a productive day

morning jams
afternoon workout

40 minutes of jumping rope
Thank you Rupert Spira

But I’m here again, crying and the reason is a thought that I let consume my days

loneliness

I miss her

Moments of awesomeness

Moments of overwhelming sadness

The days will go by

I’ll talk to you whenever

Could be tomorrow

Keeping busy

This change is one of a kind

One that makes me want to erase my mind

Start anew

But we can only go forward from here
David Bojay Nov 2018
gone with the love we both portrayed

until it fades and decays

in time we'll heal and say
          we've learned from the tragedies

      fall for oppositions

that's the first sign...

we were blind.... in denial
or is that just how I see right now?

achieve the moment of being alone

only to know, that's what I always was

to think you were the only one


the fights just leave us in distress

to know I'm no longer harming you

vice versa

the happier I seem to be

undenianiably memorable segment of our lives

to look back and still feel and know love... or what it could

be....

the unlimitedness of it

to know I do, doesn't matter if you do
is enough for

me.
David Bojay Nov 2018
the mess has been swept
the tears have been wept
i no longer long for greater length of our days together
to sleep, to be alive
to breathe, to attend today
moving my body
in and out the store
in and out the gym
in and out my room
in and out your life
only to have memory of all places and minds i've been
the doors are shutting, and I'm waiting for somebody to come out the "other" side
but they are clueless
the imagination is broken
and the train tracks have rusted
the destination is blocked
thank all of your thoughts
David Bojay Nov 2018
to oversee

to "feel" neglect on some kind of truth

the one that makes you go crazy

whatever it is

it's beautiful with you

but i shook hands with an end i couldn't accept

on to the next i guess

i can't bare with the unknown regarding you



another sip
to numb my lips




imagining the possiblity of us

desiring trust from myself

can't dwell in the hell i've created for my health

living to overcome the previous days

a transit to a better tomorrow

a mentality to try and follow

for no reason but satisfation with ones self

why would i ever want to satisfy my "SELF"?

"i" shouldn't need you, this longing is at war with my being
David Bojay Jun 2018
they tend to indulge in what uplifts their ego

i know, because i've been there

the time is spent, but not on me, but on the interests that generate creativity

the future isn't written without now

the past wasn't shaped thinking of today

the moment isn't lived in the past
David Bojay Jun 2014
I don't have to think about anything in particular when I write about you, I guess flattering you with words is an instinct

Like the leaves falling in autumn, my hand flows naturally while capturing photos of you in sentences.

Like a Christian mom prays for her children every night, and see the blessings the next day, you presence does the same without the help of a higher power


and it feels like you're the only sense I have.
there's 21 minutes left of class.
David Bojay Oct 2016
Like working out
I have to read more to get my mental juices flowing
Language is weird
Not linear
I couldn't see my past so I had to fly out the atmosphere
Imagination
Imagine, my death is near
The roses have risen but time finds its way until the end
Nothing beats a teens ambition to fit in like a trend
and LIKE LIKE LIKE LIKE LIKE
it ALL gets boring

\this got really borning my fineghsr are;nt even toucing the right lettersss anymore  amshhaha
youtube me... David Bojay
David Bojay Feb 2019
end of story before the peak is boring

hanging like a broken door hinge

(when it flows, the show goes)

tell the thoughts to go
Initiate the change beneath the snow

carry my lust in a garbage bag
keep my composure when my feet bleed

back straight, to open up my lungs
hands up, twisted tendencies

in a space where thoughts go down the drain
those that make me go
I
   N
S
      A
N
           E

some **** I can’t contain that’s why I jot it like I’m writing out my pains

the limitations of my brain

the knowing that **** just isn’t the ******* same

the change being experienced to let the **** I can’t retain simply be

I should sleep soon
I have class at 8am

Listening to New Beginnings by Part Time
Probably my favorite band haha
I’ll

See you later
eehe
David Bojay Jun 2015
and so the wind blew dust at my way
I put my hands out to cover my face
Then I realized that... when life throws things at you that you don't even want or expect
You have to let them hit you even if it hurts
Because the lessons will be learned and you will survive anything that comes your way
The first punch is always the hardest
You will live
David Bojay Apr 2016
i guess whatever comes, i have to not only deal with
but accept, enjoy, and become conscious about
i don't need anybody
and the ones who say that are the ones who have people they need
even if they've read "freedom" by osho
i love this being named sabrina
i never asked for anything more than ****
but i got the heaven my mother speaks about after death
there's no heaven, but her existence sure is like no other
i don't mean to cause love
it just happens through our consciousness
and the way our minds work
they dont correlate, but just being makes it happen
and its lovely
more than lovely
more than red, cupid, and all that ****
no romantic love
it goes beyond that
David Bojay Mar 2014
when i became a menace to myself,
i found myself voluntarily doing the impossible
and the only possible action i could do is breathe and hum along to songs,
rhythmic patterns that build me and straighten my knees up
my eyes were looking down at the fractures on the earth, looking at my fingers stick out the dry yellow dead grass
my degradation was thought to be six feet below
i’m 5’6 and my fingers sticking out were reaching towards a tower of magic and happy prisons
dreams of sceneries, full of laughter and reassurance
full of trust and rich environments
and not even a trickle above a gram of *******, can make you seem this close to Gods feet
and you’ll share playlists to the ones who want to fly without wings off of buildings
and re-up for their sake
you’ll see the variant in the sky you cried to for years
and arrogate your state of emotion
David Bojay Jan 2019
somewhere in between a second ago and my next step
something that doesn't need to let go because there's nothing to let go of
only to understand

layers we can't fully experience, but know

simply having trust in the dissolution of thought


(but sometimes I see your face in my head for 3 seconds and it brings me to a state of distraught)


no palladium for me
a free being, same as the energy that flows with the leaves
no conversations regarding what a nuisance I was with no decency

that was then

and change is now, every millisecond

how could we possibly
p     re

ten
d.

??? (!!)
11:17pm
David Bojay Jan 2019
Now I know//
to move on from what it all used to mean//
the change of mind was a sudden switch of scenes//
never told me what I was, a narcissist that couldn’t see//
ever told you how I felt? there was nothing in between//

no matter what you do//
no matter what I do//
can’t forget about us two//
will stand up and yell the truth//
the only one in view//
but one I cannot reach//
I just sit and think in blue//
thoughts I can’t pursue//
they only make me feel bad for all the **** I *******//

the end of our romance//
periods of time to enhance//
I gave “me” a second chance//
David Bojay Mar 2019
sitting
breathing
in the stillness
processing
the madness and happiness
recollecting what I didn't expect
people to reflect and thoughts to brush away

here and now

fuckkgrwkhnsjnjlSDGS dgF
ADOS
,a
saa
so much of so much
they come and they go
I just



do my best
4am
David Bojay Mar 2014
4am
I've been places where the dark is its sunlight
The noises are naked and noisy
My ears block out screams
The screams are carried in trash bags that are placed in holes in the earth that play performences to recollect value
Oh dear God what ive been deciphered as is scriptured in your book
I haven't yet noticed the fullness of time and my patience is running out
There are songs that blend with my soul
There are days where the sun doesn't give light to my world of cancer
I look forward to foggy days for some kind of push to create a man out of myself
When I see myself, I see that I'm inspired by magic lanterns and damaging the atmosphere
At times I leap back a few and notice my mistakes
And I noticed no one loves a cannabis addict who roams the moving universe I'm creating and destroying
There's little hope, but no water
There a destination, but no roads
There's dreams, but no sleep
There's your future, but I'm not there
There's people, but no humanity
It's 4am, I wonder what I'll look forward to later on in my dreary merciful prison
David Bojay May 2014
***** after feeling
         Black keys vibin'
  Splattered canvas with acrylics state of being

   Ashamed of writing nonsense

   Ashamed of myself for expecting
people to read and smile to my home loneliness and bits of , to smile to the loss of your presence on a Friday night


    Writing to flex because I don't have **** to do that's worth my while so it's a grown passion

I'm more human than I am an artist

    Don't answer if I ever ask you to love me like never before, forgive me

       Don't answer if I ask you to not walk away and slip away from my grip in a few days or so because I'm six feet beneath this feeling deceiving what I think real love is...
whatever
David Bojay Dec 2014
You know, there are things in which I would like to answer
Your face pops up all the time and I wake up and think if you're awake
I have the courage to talk to you, you're on my mind
I look back at what we used to be and judge it
I pick holes at what we used to be
I think things are better now
I'm secure finally
I think I'll love you better
It's 5am, just a normal day... making myself some tea
You know how many things have to happen before we see eachother
The thoughts that cross my mind
The things I would do, the things I end up doing between that time
Everything used to be so off
I'm observant but I speak on it now
You're asleep right now and I wouldn't mind waking up next to you
It's a cool thought even though we're still teens
The thing is, have I caused so much damage to go back?
Or too much to go forward?
The thing is, I cant leave you like that
I myself wont allow someone I love to be left without security
Without my love in her heart
While you're reading this a lot is going through your head
While you're reading this, a lot of people are drying
Kids are getting *****
Houses are being burned down
Babies are getting aborted
People aren't making it through surgery
Someone just comitted suicide
AND I'M STANDING ON THE LEDGE OF LOVE YELLING I CAN MAKE YOU FORGET ABOUT THOSE THINGS THAT HAPPEN
I can heLP YOU NOT GIVE A **** ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK ABOUT YOU
THAT HOLDS YOU BACK
I spent the majority of my teen years debating if my days would come to end eternally
Eventually, they all do
Physcally tired but **** it
Keep it going
I haven't lost my touch
I thought I wouldn't love right
Then again, define it
You can't define the way we act
Our motives are ours
You know what's ******* crazy
We're ******* awesome
Think of yourself
Think of your brain
There are two hemispheres
Think of the functions, the muscles, the abstracts, think of your ******* spinal cord that connects your body to your brain
Think of your will power
Now think of the "we are one" thing
Think of us
Alright I'm off to drink my tea now, it's ready
David Bojay May 2018
you know there's no reserves//
don't wait for the day I leave//
expect the seasons to come, i'll follow the days to our death//
freedom comes from simple reasoning//
the birds will sing to the harmony of life//
ensembles will play to the love that generates from the electromagnetic waves//
can't waste today, for the now isn't patient, it is attended whether you are here or not//
why wouldn't i be here for my own life?//
down some reason, understanding mental functions to live beyond unconscious actions//
don't worry about your thoughts that conceive inner suffering//
it's easy when you learn the controls, experience doesn't happen overnight//
David Bojay Jan 2021
perhaps you're my karma
seeing you glow from a far
regretting the obvious
options that could've been controlled
logically thought about
fate of man
fate of all
"destiny" betrays
busy as of late
hope it stays that away
from this feeling i must stray
"call it fate, call it karma"
writing to this song
trying to live with no doubts
up into the sky i shout
downing some loud
a love i can't allow to
devour
me
hazy
lazy in the morning after my night shift
alone
always
idk why i think about it so much
previous love, emotional lust
i wasn't so tough
i'm not so tough
i wish it was a bluff
love love love
flying doves
up and above
stuff stuff stufffff... haha
i'm sleepy
i just needed to write
eager for your delight
perhaps you are the light
i
want to
be right
David Bojay Oct 2016
I can't compare
But I will anyway
Individuality
To me
A state of being without anything afflicting the current "self"
I can't even say self without feeling wrong

But there is self all over my room

Self there self here

Self within

Self.... everywhere
6
David Bojay Oct 2015
6
if you don't go crazy at least once in your life


you will die in a crazy way......
6/1
David Bojay Jun 2018
6/1
a chapter has ended//
i have found keys to door i didn't think i could have access to//
a door created only through self will and taking on the mysteries of my experience//
my room is empty, i have moved//
the days are going by like the cars passing on the highway//
like the pages being read//
like morning to afternoon, until the sun falls//
who's there to catch it?//
observing places i've never seen//
looking at people i'll never see again//
memorizing streets//
changing the sheets//
because too much friction make her cream//
laying down next to you//
thoughtless when i look in your eyes//
thoughtful when im away from your presense, it's my demise//
overthinking until i'm out of energy, sleep and there's more time to experience//
conscious this time, energy and creativity//
to make this happen//
writing observations that happen within, to formulate a new idea of "me"//
waiting for sabrina to get home
David Bojay Nov 2017
there's a science behind you//
a science you don't think about everyday//
genetics//
**** your mother, or **** your father//
or bless them//
judgement doesn't exist, so why does it matter//
words don't mean much, give what you want some meaning//
you're all that, you're not all that//
you're nobody, and that's beautiful//
David Bojay Aug 2015
If it was up to me I wouldn't have a name
Menace to society now I see the irony
Every sound is a different kind of feel to observe
A different present moment
How we live during certain  times
It just flows in me snd I let it **** me
Stages of our life that we cant define in time
Character from a high being innovating
With worth in their brains
We're all soldiers since birth and we rebel
And we **** inside..... and we live consciously
*******
A grasping student
I belong to her.... my mother from above
mother of my heart, you are one
And we create ourselves
Just a being from planet earth
We are the creators of life
And mother nature is just being
Treat her well
Stages in my mind
Cages are being broken
We are beings
I see them in my room
There's no mind
There's no rules
There's no mystery
Embrace misery to learn and earn
I'm just a being
Fall for yourself
Open arms...vulnerable
Feel you
I see you
We're just beings
Aliens are here
They're just other conscious beings
**** social media I see myself in keys
Lost in black and white
I own the measures
So vulnerable
**** a phone
My lord, we are our own
What is ******
A way of being
Aliens
I see classically
The MUSIC
I see
Stages are shown
**** a title
The being
Myself
I feel it
I'm just a ****** to you
FUCKKCKCKKAJAKQIIQ
The self
DUDUDUDUUDE
GOD
Communicating
I'm so free
Recording in my mind
Molecules I see you
Messengers
To this feel
The being
This experience
*** and the being
Insane in the king
Voyage the self spiritually
I'm ******* in person
No LANGUAGE
Spiritually depresses
THE SELF

Back in time

SPEAK IN ***

Characters

Languages

****
nd death

BACK IN TIME BEINGS

AND DEATH

I am energy
****

MuSic and death

I AM AN IDEA
Human

Humans e
DOkao

Omggggg in my head


In my head

Prrscrfkkk

Peace and sacrifice k

*** peace
Ggaggaga
Ajgkkkk
*** ACCEPTANCE
THE MIND

*** I'M LIVING
*** I FEEL
***

DUDE
In my head

HEAVEN
HELL
I SEE THE GODS
THEY SPEAK IN CODE
MODERN

I SAW EVERYTHING

I WAS NOTHING
I WAS SO SATAN
I WAS SO GOD

we're not alone
David Bojay Jul 2014
Find a plastic love somewhere in the Savannah
Dont find a metal love,
those rust
I'm moving countries if I ever go anywhere with what I'm doing
Maybe go from hotel to hotel, city to city when I'm in my prime of years
Dollars to Euro
Euros to Rupees
Rupees to Pesos
Inhale the air of every continent
My mom told me I'm the brightest out of my brother and sister
I laughed in disbelief
Girl to girl isn't so much fun, I learned
I love new faces, I just don't like getting used to seeing them
I love yours
Permanent hickeys on your pale skin would be scary, your chest would be covered in them by now
I'll answer truthfully to anything now, used to lie a lot
I got over it
Water is water, but people drink Fiji like if it made life a lot better
Sometimes when I'm at home and have nowhere to go I look at my friends snapchat stories, I write about what kind of vibe the place has
A few sentences doesn't make it justice
Nothing really gives any justice, I dont know if its supposed to be that way or maybe I don't know the right words to describe it
One day I'll meet Schoolboy Q and we'll cruise to his old stuff, atleast they'll be old then
Then again music never gets old
"The Purge" always gets me in the mood to do something illegal, I don't really do anything about it
The mood is cool though
I feel so Friday after a long week of school
My random
David Bojay Jan 2019
lonelier than ever
get by being clever
patient with the wait....the wounds to sever

Look the other way

listening to your cover of city of stars

the vibrations of your voice
something I always paid attention to

the show goes on but this is a reflection I can’t deny

A truth in thought

In mind

To know it’s not really there

To be self aware

To know that the realization is a step

To know that this moment
Is all that’s ever promised
8pm
David Bojay Jun 2014
8pm
I was riding my bike earlier today.
Drops of rain were hitting my head, and I didn't bother going home anytime soon.
I talk a lot of ignornace, is it really bliss?
I try not to, but I'm the perfect imperfect human.
I got off my bike and took a deep breathe, clasped my fingers, and sat indian style in the park I go to everyday.
I listened to the kids play, I listened the wind moving the tree branches violently, I listened to parents telling their children they won't be there much longer because of the storm coming.
The clouds felt so close to my head, but I'd probably need a million ladders, each ten feet tall to see above them.
And to think sometimes I feel like I'm walking on the sun, imagine how many billions of ladders I need to feel like a million bucks.
My mom always asks me why I always leave home, and go out for long periods of time on my bike.
I dont think she understands I dont feel home, at "home".
So I'm out looking for one in mother natures heart.
It's 8:25 pm and I'm at the park again, no ones here, for safety I guess.
It looks like the sky is angry, its roaring a lot.
I dont think I should write about anyone anymore,
I feel like I'm not putting my mouth to use if I just write about someone and posting them in this website, thinking hopefully they'll click the link on my Instagram bio and read what I wrote about them.
I figured I'd say what I felt about them face to face now, it's better.
Also I wont cry as much at night when I reread what I wrote about them, when they're gone.
I have a lot of poeple to express to, eye to eye.
I owe it to them.
They've made their mark in my darkest of days.
So I'll use the best of my vocal chords to clear up their gray skies when they look up.
I hope to take away the gloomyness in your souls, because I feel a lot for you.
I meditated today, I forgot I was even alive for a few minutes until I snapped, soemtimes I wish I could meditate forever.
I don't know where people are going with anything, neither do I.
I just enjoy filling up notebooks with nonsense, and feeling happy.
David Bojay May 2014
I don't feel like being at school, at all.

Today is a white screen
  

     with a touch of nothingness.
David Bojay Jul 2014
$1.50 shirt from the thrift store, $40 Ralph Lauren shorts, back to school Vans shoes, and some confidence.
Riding my bike around blocks hoping to find some inspiration even though I've been writing more than ever, still feel empty after I'm done.
Got plenty numbers on my phone, but I only talk to one and thats through kik messenger.
Have a lot to say but no one wants to listen to someone that's delusional.
I started thinking straight though, these days make a lot more sense.
I try not writing about the world anymore, I dont have a clue about it.
I think my bike makes me feel a lot better when I feel sad, I feel like with every peddle I take it erases little pieces of big worries or bad memories.
I try to peddle as much as I can.
I miss a lot of things.
I always wonder what would happen if a car ran me over when I'm riding my bike.
I always ride on the big streets even though my mom tells me not to, I dont like listening.
I always do the opposite of what anyone doesn't want me to do.
"Dont do drugs", you'll see me buying.
"Dont love me", you'll see me post links on Twitter to poetry about that person.
I started reading about useless subjects, none of that really matters.
Ian G. Barbour is a loser.
Just love, and believe in what you want to believe in.
I want to sign my name on books I wrote while I was depressed, but I don't see that happening anymore.
I'm outside listening to crickets, is this how it sounds when I make a joke?
I don't see any stars, I'm kind of relieved when I dont see any.
I used to think stars were just reflections of sad people on earth, I thought that 4 months ago.
My therapist thought I was delusional, I could see it in her eyes and in how she talked to me.
These mosquitoes are getting annoying so I'm going end this.
Remember, "a strange grey distance separates our pale mind still from the pulsing continent of the heart of man".
David Bojay Jan 2014
it’s really hard to up heave the way i feel at times

people try to cheer the environment with unsophisticated actions

you’d have to probe me to actually feel what “feelings” really are

see life is a ******* big gamble

you either risk it all to live a great life or a ****** life

then you have teen love, with the same view points and bam another what the ****

another story to tell your friends

most girls i know have neophyte like if they don’t know what to do

then they say **** when emotions kick in that’s incoherent

when love hits it’s hard to stay away, i’d rather ponder

when a door shuts be an opportunist to win things over and find the key

that’s like giving up and trying something new and ******* at it

i’ll stick to learning every instrument in an orchestra so i can make my own concerto

and i will, I’ve been waiting for 5 years to start the composing

and i am a genius, notes are colors, music is art

if Picasso would’ve been a musical genius the music would turn into colors, the sistine chapel would be a nice orchestral piece

so many what if’s in the world

like if 20 years past, and they made another bible, would i be in it?

cause i’m destined to be somebody, it’s a promise

people take insults in a very ***** way

you choose what to be offended by in other words

a girl gets called a ***** and cries

so somebody can call me a musical genius and cry

it’s really the way you take it up the ***

in some occasions words really are stronger than actions

can love get old?

does true love really wait?

understanding is vital to me, but taking time out of your day to read and examine my writing is even better to me

cause then people appreciate your intelligence and admire you in a way they can’t see

and all the moments that are bad all conclude and remind me of a small *******

publish thoughts draw music make art creativity is everywhere find it

it is now 2014, I wrote this 17 months ago and I'm suicidal
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