Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Cassidy Shoop Apr 2015
if it were up to me
i would show up at your house
dressed as the love of your life.
i would drag you from your bed
rip your heart from your chest
and leave your lifeless body at the door
for your mother to find.

i would tear every good feeling
straight out of your stomach
and replace them with memories
of all the things that made you love me.

i would burn the remaining pieces
and scatter the ashes
along beaches we planned to get married
and cities we were supposed to live.

i would leave your mind
hollow and unattended
and force you to feel me forgetting you,

sort of like what you did to me.
I wrote this in like 5 minutes because I was angry and thinking about the past. Sorry it's sort of dark.
Cassidy Shoop Jul 2014
tell me why it's been two years and my heart still hasn't caught up with my head. it beats so fast i'm surprised i'm not dead and i can't decide if it stops or beats faster when  i hear your voice at 4am. the sunrise still looks just like the colors in your left eye and the only difference is that the sun goes away at night but you stay awake in my thoughts. everything reminds me that we could actually be something real and the worst part is that it's up to me but my heart isn't strong enough to take that risk a second time or should i say a fifth or sixth or seventh time. then again maybe you never left in the first place. maybe my heart isn't behind, but my head is just too far forward to be able to see what it's passing up. maybe you've been here the whole time.
Cassidy Shoop Nov 2015
Whether I'm the first person you think of
when you open your eyes in the morning
Or the last person you would choose to call
in an emergency of sheer panic
At least I am running through your mind at all
And I will keep running.
Cassidy Shoop Apr 2014
i never thought
i was the type of girl
whose tragedies turned into fears
until i caught a glimpse
of my demons
creeping back up on me;
this time,
they came from the reflection
in your eyes
instead of his suffocating tongue
Sea
Cassidy Shoop Oct 2014
Sea
i've always thought of you as beautiful, but who doesn't think this of their closest friends? the way you talk and move and breathe gives me a feeling that i've always defined as jealousy. maybe i'm not crazy for wishing for our skin to come in contact, or maybe we both are. as long as we were crazy together i wouldn't mind.
Cassidy Shoop Apr 2014
if there's one thing
about my deranged mind
i'll never understand
it's the fact that you treat me so well
and you tell me everything
any normal girl
would love to hear
but the way you make me feel
will still never compare
to the feeling i got
from just a simple look
from him
Cassidy Shoop Aug 2015
I am in love with people who are raw,

who aren’t afraid to show their colors

even if those colors are watered down

and the paint that covers their heart

has been chipped away at by ghosts of the past

who sneak into bedrooms at night

and whisper into lonesome ears,

“i am the one you thought you’d gotten rid of

and I am the reason you long for a past 

you wish had never happened to begin with”
Cassidy Shoop Jan 2015
******* my hands haven't shook this much since the first time you held them in the backseat of the car. what if i'm just imagining all of this and you don't actually miss me at all? what if on friday i pour my heart out to you and you can't tell me you've felt the same for the past two years? why the **** do i still care so much? god i miss your touch and your lips and your skin and eyes and fingers and that perfect ******* smile. why am i the only one who sees it?
Cassidy Shoop May 2015
I remember when the clouds began to look like a vortex
Hovering above the trees
Ready to inhale anything in their path,
And I remember when the walls of my own bedroom
Started to feel like barricades
Secluding me from all the things
That made me feel anything at all,
And I remember my own voice
Passing quietly through the empty hearts
Of the ones I thought had been listening all along
And came hurling back toward me
Like a car spun out of control across wet asphalt,
And I remember when the only ones around
To keep me company
Were the echoes between my own skin and bones.

What a relief
That when you left
They followed close behind.
Cassidy Shoop Feb 2015
we opened its stiff windows
and the room above the kitchen
could breathe again.
hot and stuffy like a car
with its doors sealed tight
in the middle of July,
the summer air
rushed into its lungs
as if it had just taken
a first breath from an inhaler.
meaningless,
useless,
simply a "spare"
used only for things to be seen
once or twice a year;
soon to be a room full of strangers
only to be seen
once or twice a year.
Cassidy Shoop Apr 2014
I had always figured that in a few years, today’s date would be tattooed on the inside of my left wrist. Now the only tattoos I have are the scars you left in the depths of my mind, and the memory of a summer I won’t forget.
Cassidy Shoop Nov 2015
They cut down all the trees that stood in the entrance to your neighborhood
and I wondered if it was a sign that we were meant to end after all,

because what are the chances that on the same day
I sat next to your mother's girlfriend in a parking lot
nowhere near her house or yours
and ignored her glances
when only a week before I would have made pleasant conversation?

How perfectly in tune would the universe need to be
for me to find out only hours later
that he has a birthmark on the outside of his wrist
just like you do?
Cassidy Shoop Feb 2015
The smell of her hair
is not lavender or perfume.
It is chlorine summers
and cigarette smoke at a party,
a good party.
Her skin is not velvet.
It is fresh, white linen
that feels like home
the second it is smoothed over the mattress.
Her voice is not a whispering mother.
It is the ocean against the shore
seeping deep into the sand,
wishing it could stay longer.
Cassidy Shoop Apr 2015
The mirror looking back at her
screams compliments over the loud music
coming from the stereo behind.
With artfully smudged eyeliner,
she slips into the little black dress
purchased from the cheap lingerie shop
down the street from her apartment complex.
Six inches above the concrete sidewalk
clicking with every step,
a lit cigarette dangling at her teeth,
she walks proudly to the ball
twenty minutes past midnight.

The morning after;
spiked hot coffee in hand
to cure mistakes of the previous night
and a knock on the door
greets a worsening headache.
The door opens to a well dressed man
and a tiny glass slipper
atop a diamond-studded throne.
He holds the delicate shoe to her foot,
toe nails painted black,
and patiently waits for a response.

“Those aren’t my red stilettos.”
My assignment was basically to take a fairytale and twist it. I chose to make Cinderella a badass.
Cassidy Shoop Jun 2015
we can't always follow our dreams, or our hearts for that matter. if we did we would all be walking around aimlessly, running into walls and sneaking up on ex lovers the way we beg them to do to us in our heads.
Cassidy Shoop Apr 2015
i've written hundreds of thousands of beautiful lines of poetry about you in my head but i'm never satisfied with what comes out of it. i suppose it all comes down to one sentence.

it's been three years and i still believe you're the one i am supposed to end up with.
Cassidy Shoop Aug 2014
This thing has been eating at me for years now.
How ironic.
It welcomes itself into my skin and feeds off bones and thoughts that aren't even my own anymore. But don't make it angry because it'll bury itself so deep in my stomach that it'll start to sound like my own voice screaming at me through my bloodshot eyes. I've tried again and again to **** it in its sleep, but it only gets stronger the harder I try, and after all my attempts to ****** this ******* monster, I realize I've been looking in the mirror the whole time.
Cassidy Shoop Nov 2015
Your room is becoming my broken boat in the middle of a raging ocean, but it won't float with both of us in it.
We can patch up the holes all we want but we both know that tape won't permanently fix splintered boards and I know you can't admit it but you'd survive just fine if I jumped into the mouth of the creature that's been stalking us and the sea would slowly bring you back to shore if you would let it because it's much fonder of you than it's ever been of me.
Cassidy Shoop Feb 2015
You are a guitar
and its woodsy scent
when it has never been played.

You are the forest
as background to a storm,
car windows down
and no sound but the glass
cutting the wind in half
and the pounding in our chests.

You are summer at 3am
when sleep is unnecessary
and the stars are most vulnerable.

You are the scent
of
cedar
and rain
and home.
Cassidy Shoop Jan 2015
it's sunday morning and you wake up early for him.

you sit in a building with a bunch of "good people" and you know they're good because they're in the same place you are.

you listen to a man or a woman speak your words for you except they aren't your words.

you come home and you sit on the couch and you read your little book full of what you say is the "truth" but you don't actually know.

you change the station because what's entering your ears isn't about him and in his eyes that's a sin.

you get angry when i call you religious because it's "not the right term."

you tell me i'll never be happy unless i introduce myself to a being that doesn't even exist.

you watch your youngest daughter do what makes her happy and you sigh in disappointment.

when will you learn?
Cassidy Shoop Mar 2015
I can’t stop thinking
about how you always hated your teeth
and the way the ones in the front go sinking
towards each other like mountains too steep
to climb. You say it happened in a car
accident, that the force from the crash
is what shoved them together that way but I know you far
too well not to point out that you are the last
person who would admit that you were
born with any sort of flaw at all.
You are the type of person to slur
your words until they fall
from your tongue wearing a disguise,
just to get me to grieve over your demise.
I had to write a sonnet for my poetry class and I never write sonnets cause I hate rhyming but I think I did okay
Cassidy Shoop Feb 2015
all you've ever known is me so i have to wonder if you wish you could have a taste of those girls with long brown hair and naturally bright eyes because if i were in your shoes i would at least want to experience that before settling for someone like me and i'm so scared that one day you'll find a girl whose eyes are golden in the sunlight but deep brown when you're alone in your bedroom that i know so well and that you'll actually have the chance to run your fingers through her soft wavy hair and they won't get stuck in the process because it isn't messy and tangled like mine and she won't have to wear makeup to hide the dark circles under her eyes because she doesn't have to send pills down her throat in the morning just to feel normal enough to get through the day without breaking down the way i do when i realize you're too good for me
you deserve better
Cassidy Shoop Feb 2015
I loved the way you found subtle ways
to criticize my every move,
as long as it was worded well.
I loved the way you lied to all your friends
about me;
I'm sure they know
what a lovely person I am.
I loved the way you clung to me;
I know you didn't mean to leave
when the lights came back on.
I loved the way you told me all your secrets;
the ones about your ex
and how infatuated with her you still are.
I loved the way you told me
we should stop talking
because you "would rather not hook up"
as if calling me three days later
would make me believe
I had wanted to in the first place.

I love the way
I am finally over it.
Cassidy Shoop Mar 2015
The longest drive of my life
was only four and a half dragging minutes
around two street corners
Followed by the loudest sound of an unlocking door
my oozing ears have ever witnessed
And the guiltiest hug my arms will ever bear.
His scent still lingering on my clothes
and face
and those same arms,
I proceed to tell you my secrets
(not the fun kind you whisper to your friends)
the ones I could only stand to hide under my tongue
for one whole day,
and purely for the sake of your innocence.
I reach into your chest and rip out what's rightfully mine
and I can't apologize enough
as I ring out every good memory I have ever given you
and replace it with a night I can't even fully remember.
Naturally, you curse
and leave me alone in your room as if
I've kicked you out of your own home, as if
you never want to see my face again
unless it is twisted and bruised, as if
the only thing I have ever given you
was a chip in your paper-thin skull.
After draining my lips of "I'm sorry"s and "I love you"s
you find the decency in your heart to take hold of my hand,
walk me silently to the bathroom,
and politely ask me to join you
for a bubble bath.

— The End —