How could it be,
That you were my only.
I could never feel,
But I always felt so lonely.
Your beautiful face,
When did it become so ugly.
It happened so fast,
Now we watch it burn slowly.

How could have I known,
Our love would never have no name.
Oh I'm such a fool,
If I could I would do it again.
But all I remember,
Was a shadow that I became.
Now all I do is mourn,
Don't you ever feel my pain.

How many more scars,
Will your emptiness leave.
What about my heart,
Would it ever let me breathe.
Left me with your hollow,
That I wasn't yet ready to keep.
This night is far from over,
On your memory it feeds.



Now my heart cries,
It reminds what we couldn't have.
Now my dream lies,
Keeps me awake and drives me mad.
And i try to hide,
Close my eyes and take a step back.
But when I open my eyes,
Everything's still painted in black.

Once upon a time,
I saw the angel cry.
I stood there mesmerised,
And I never asked why.

I thought I had found,
The most beautiful sight.
Oh, I stood there in her awe,
As I saw the angel cry.

Her wings spand the moon,
And eyes like stars in the sky.
I thought I heard her whisper,
As she slowly bade me good-bye.




Oh, my years felt so old,
My life so much away and far.
And then when she disappeared,
I realised she gave me a scar.
Oh, those winds were so cold,
That night so lonely and dark.
I don't recall what happened,
But I know I lost my heart.




That moment still haunts,
I was afraid to look in her eyes.
Now that I think of it,
those tears never did dry.

We just stood in silence,
I don't remember when I died.
I woke up and searched for her
But there was only sun-rise.

that's all I remember,
Of that one lonely night.
I thought I saw a dream,
Where I saw the angel cry.



Oh, my years felt so old,
My life so much away and far.
And then when she disappeared,
I realised she gave me a scar.
Oh, those winds were so cold,
That night so lonely and dark.
I don't recall what happened,
But I know I lost my heart.

I see the world--
from the lies of my eyes,
Where the wind blows,
In the winter where I cry.
Take me to my home ,
Put me in a grave where I'll die.
I hear the song,
Of the lonely bird in the sky.
In the hue of the blue,
One vast ocean where it hides.
A place for me to mourn,
And plead them my good-bye.
Those faces that I can't recall,
A crowd that once let me in.
I stole all the love I wanted,
And exchanged heart for my skin.
That moment never lets go
And it is eating me from within,
Find me a place to bleed,
And wash away my every sin.
Every ghost that I once made,
Is now reaching for my heart.
And this truth won't ever fade,
As it slowly tears me apart.
That empty street where I walked,
Has took me so much afar.
I never counted my steps,
And now I am on a different path.
Consuming what is left,
Shattered pieces of a broken glass.
A shadow that reflects,
I am blind to myself at last.

-It was cold and grey
clouds covered the sky
Two men waiting for the bus
As the spring kissed goodbye


One was young
Bright , Mathew his name
Other was old
Tired ,they called him bane
On the other side
From the pavement across
Kids were playing
In dirt and moss
Mathew turned
And whispered to bane
Ah , childhood
Wish I could live it again
But bane just smiled
And not a word he uttered
Mathew was silent
Under his breath he muttered
How rude!
But at that moment
A pretty lady did cross
And Mathew stared
Coudnt keep his eyes off
Mathew turned
And whispered to bane
Ah, manhood
Don't you wish to be young again
But bane just smiled
And not a word he uttered
Mathew was silent
Under his breath he muttered
I was rude !
But at that moment
A beggar came in the plot
He asked for money
But Mathew had not
Mathew turned
And whispered to bane
Ah,charity
Mind some change ?
But bane just smiled
Not a word he uttered
Mathew was silent
Under his breath he muttered
He's cold !
But at that moment
A bus came to stop
And the old got up
used his cane to guide and walk
And Mathew just smiled
And not a word he uttered
Mathew was silent
and under his breath he muttered
I was blind !

Some promises,
That we hold in our emptiness;
Our yesterday was made
And now I am afraid,
To break free--
Nothing was left for me
When I opened my eyes
And still couldn't see,
You were gone in morrow
And there was no trace of me.
I Stumble in my loneliness,
Held your color;
And painted my hollowness.
How can I forget--
When you were all I would get,
A part of my consciousness;
That I would learn to regret.
Cometh the night and cold,
That grip me in my breath;
How would I run away--
When I couldn't even find my way
And all that was lost,
Every moment of our past--
Was left with me to stay.
I hear your voice,
And my head is full of--
Tears and noise,
I have to make a scar to bleed,
Your name engraved--
On the blade that cuts deep;
Will you still pretend,
That I was the one who couldn't see--
And now when you're gone,
Why is the that--
I was the one who wouldn't leave.
Your thoughts do fade
And now and then a new day is made,
But I won't let go of the time,
That you and me couldn't make.
Moments pass by and I am left awake,
These arms still feel you--
My heart is still at the gate,
What would it take,
Wasn't love enough--
To conquer and break,
Into your heart--
I gave you my love and soul,
And now I watch mine--
Grow bitter and cold,
Even though seasons pass by--
Your sorrow never seems to grow old.
I made my peace,
But I still have your disease,
Infected by your presence;
In darkness I find my release--
When the world grows calm
And the hurt cease.
Then, I find you again--
With every dream I breathe,
In the forgotten yesterday of ours,
My whole existence feeds.
But these promises,
That we hold in our emptiness;
Our yesterday was made
And now I am afraid.
To break free--
Nothing was left for me
When I opened my eyes
And still couldn't see,
You were gone in morrow--
And there was no trace of me.

The night was cold and a certain scent was in the air,
The gloom was beginning to set in and bleed despair.
An old man walked by the empty lot, had a cane in his hand.
To-night full moon grazed the sky, and one could see no man.
The old man moved slowly, every step lay trembling noise
A black-hole loomed the atmosphere, ******* everything in a void.
There by the dark alley, a shadow began to appear,
His eyes peering through the mask, waiting for old man to come near.
The blade in his clenched fist, ready to cut and tear,
He was the reaper now, he'll gift the old man his nightmare.
The old man turned a corner, and made his way to him,
And the stranger clenched his blade, he would force it deep within.
The old man walked ever so slow, the time wouldn't come to pass,
Stranger kept waiting, he knew not how long this moment would last.
The wind was getting stronger, dark clouds hovered the sky,
Old leaves spread across their distance began to fly.
The old man stopped in his tracks, staring at his path,
He saw the stranger but he still did not turn back.
The stranger thought of the old man 'surely the guy is mad',
And the night began to grow cold and darkness got more black.
The old man began his walk again, this time he was fast,
And the stranger counted seconds before he could attack,
The old man was at an arms length but he still could not see,
Stranger felt so strange, the old man still did not flee.
For a moment moon was in clear and the stranger took a peek,
The old man was smiling and there were daggers in place of his teeth.

Your day is night
And night is day
Cycle of stars,
That you dream away.
Heavy eyes,
Drifting in wonder-land
Sometimes empty spaces,
In corners and blank.
Lonely sight,
If you ever find yourself awake
The dim street-light,
Forming a moth lake.
Different cries,
Beyond the window-wall
Song of dark,
Eclipsing the world and all.
Calm dyes',
Solitude in the air
Spiritual sight-seeing,
And there are no night-mares.
Up-side down,
But yet as free as the sky
No-one to know you,
World hath but died.
Shadow cast shapes,
In shades of yellow and white
Every-one is gone,
One no longer has to hide.
World is free and pure,
there's magic in the air
Your eyes open to see,
And heart left to hear.
Your moon is sun
And sun the moon
In crowded hours,
Whence your sleep looms.

Her red eyes whispered,
And the tears began to fall
Her face slowly dispersed,
And she leaned against the wall.
The dark slowly cleared,
There I saw her crawl
In the midst of her fear,
Now I could see her all.
She lingered on the wooden floor,
As the shrieks filled the air
She wasn't herself anymore,
The old face but disappeared.
Instead eyes darker than the dark,
Pounced at me from the clear
At her chest was a burning scar,
With all the fire her heart bears.
Her fingers clenched in a fist,
Broken glass lying everywhere
Her eye's doused in mist,
She was in her nightmare.
Pitying for her sorry state,
Waiting for her to calm
I wondered if it was too late,
But I wanted her in my arms
Her beautiful face still haunted,
And I longed for an embrace
I guess I was still by her side,
But I knew soon I would fade.
I felt from across the room,
Something poking at my eye
It was so painful to feel
I wished I could rather die.
We weren't meant to be,
But I still lived in a lie
And now when it's over,
It's so hard to say good-bye.
Then i felt her arms in mine
As she slowly came back to bed
Maybe we can leave this behind
As we both slowly laid to rest.
And there across the table
Covered in layers of red
There by them white flowers
Sat my lonely head.

It's hard to say but no one's gonna' learn a danm thing anyway,
So let's pretend it's all a funny joke and it'll all go away
But hey, wait a minute listen to me, I want you to er...stay,
Well, it's tough talking to yourself and no one really ever comes my way
But I'll love to have a fight, get me some insight
How the alpha male reacts and I have no solid facts
In-fact I just got some emotions out of devotions sittin' on a dynamite
Of brutal almost mutual satisfaction we have when we diss somebody,
Maybe it's just me but I think everybody shares beef with somebody,
I like them kinda rare, them ***** and **** bare
Yeah, give them religious folks a *******' nightmare
But I don't really care if you wanna shoot me down with god,
I'll just pretend you just said something that rhymes with hot-dog,
Oh my god, never really got that catch-phrase,
And every-time I hear a girl screaming Jesus Christ,
While ridin' on my stick, well.. It's big I have nothing to hide
But back to the case, I always wonder.. What would joseph do,
I mean it could be anyone, me, your momma, or you
is that even a sin, Is there a place for them in hell
Dear, pope please do tell
that pointy hat is dope though,
Too bad I couldn't give a less **** about how many *** scandal you repel,
I always had an inclination to profanity, sort of mind alteration to reality
But quite frankly, I'm down making fun of myself
I guess it's just another opportunity to scream for help,
Hell, I don't know what I'm gonna' do, maybe call an attorney and sue
Here's a riddle to give you a *******,
What's red and not blue,
If you Ever find the answer bid your brains adieu.


I don't know what to say but this is a ****** tragedy
We're in a cage, trapped, we can never be what we want to be
Tuned into the the wonder-land, creating their own symphony,
They say we're the mad-men, always painting the world in a fantasy.
I don't know if they understand but dreams alter reality
Grabbed by both hands, too late to let go of this opportunity
Don't quit even though it's over, spill it in graffiti
To let the whole world know you don't give up so easily.


See, what I did there ?
Made it look like I did care, threw in some motivation crap,
It's just a trap, I swear
I talk so low about myself, sometimes I often forget I exist
But it kills me inside sometimes when I realize but I still can't resist
To diss and admit that I'm much better than so many of you and I'm so ashamed of it
It's like my ***** and your ****** just somehow never agrees to fit
I mean I'm just here typing away random **** and it'll still be better,
Then most awesome of your hits..
But.. I get it
People are so easy to offend and there's no way around it
So c'mon now, I know ya'll just waiting to pounce
And renounce everything I laid on the table,
I'm sorry I'm just highly unstable, give me my mental certificate
And put on a label that shows of I'm disabled,
Some of you must be goin' .. Ooo that's no thing to joke about,
Enough with your rants, my future kids won't like the way you shout and..
'People suffer from real mental disorders in the real world'
But hey... I have a problem too.. You know.. I hit my head and..
'STOP IT, in the name of the lord I command you..'
Please do
whatever you want, all I am saying is I have a real problem too...
'That's it, you're goin' to hell kid, you blasphemous pig"
.
.
Aight, that was uncalled for, I could have made a better metaphor
But I can't help it, could only find baby syrup in the medical score store,
And it's kinda cold though, I have a super cute android and she likes to blow..
And dry clean my house for me, I am a rich dude
I can afford totally afford a robot, I know it sounds rude
But it's six in the morning and I haven't slept all night
And I wasn't even mastrubating (Christian sin strike # -1)
It was fun just smokin' stuff and just hallucinating,
And suddenly there was a loud bang and it started raining,
.... ***** and more ***** and some wine,  it's basically ***** but whatever nevermind,
As long as you don't understand what I'm writing about,
I guess you'll be fine.



I don't know what to say but this is a ****** tragedy
We're in a cage, trapped, we can never be what we want to be
Tuned into the the wonder-land, creating their own symphony,
They say we're the mad-men, always painting the world in a fantasy.
I don't know if they understand but dreams alter reality
Grabbed by both hands, too late to let go of this opportunity
Don't quit even though it's over, spill it in graffiti
To let the whole world know you don't give up so easily.



See, what I did there ?
I made a long write even longer
and your patience to deal with inevitable even stronger
And you know how they day what can't **** you, make you stronger
Well, I'm afraid to break it down to you, it's a lie
I once saw a man being attacked by a wild cat and he survived,
Lost 5 fingers, one toe, half a ****, and  two eyes,
Kanye west, who the hell were you talking about ?
Something that doesn't kills you, makes you one step close to die
Hello, i mean you are just all ready to say good-bye
And things flash before your eyes and you regain your strength and you fight
And people are so glad that you made it out alive
It's just so Hollywood and has such a good vibe
But that's now how it happens, things get cut off
I know I'm over steppin', but I'm just a pessimist
Every time someone disobeys me, I cut my wrists
I throw tantrums now and then, just one rich spoil kid
Banging girls and what not, DON'T ENVY ME, I didn't ******' asked for it,
Your god have it to me. :)

















See what I did there ?
I just left it intentionally blank, I have to admire you though
How come you always express yourself so bland?
I mean do you assign dumb people to do your job and make a plan
What is it, what's the secret of your stupid expression
I need to *******' understand, how can so much ******* come from two boney hands ?
It's real stupid when everyone writes the same thing everyday
Man, just do away with ponies, and throw in some hints of grey
That's what I do and it kinda makes me look so serious and great
aight, you need to stop whatever that you're doing and meditate
Absorb every stupid thing you can feel in your environment and just radiate,
Then slowly lift your arms and strangle yourself to death,
Don't ******' retaliate.
That's how I feel when I go through those thoughts of yours,
Yeah bite me, get on all fours, like the ***** you are and facilitate
I know I'm being too hard but I'm on drugs and a broken heart,
Got these scars, made out with a stripper and kinda got too far
But apart from these little matters of faith and religion,
I don't think she had a problem with me until I did that part,
I guess it's never too easy to pull of a stunt in a sixty mine position,
When you're three feet too long and sixty mile too fast in a car.
I think that did it for me, i got a sense of reality and enough of free **** and virtuality,
Oh, it's just me and my humanity, fighting over who get's the opportunity
To point out similarities between you and the kid who lived down the lane,
Really old-school, liked them butterflies and everything vain
I mean I can do this over and over again, till I hit the sweet spot
Right between your thighs and send a message to your brain
.
.
I don't give a ****,
Never have and never will
There's so much space in my shoes
That you can never fill
You can walk in them sure
But it'll make you look like an idiot,
You ****
End of the story
PERIOD.

The familiarity sets in--
And sense's begin to howl
fear is born with-in,
Climate smell's so foul.

Noise begins to whisper,
Something sour in your mouth
And as when the bells chime,
You have no clue what's it about.

Heart-beat grows to a shiver,
despair begins to shout
In-midst of this ensuing sentence,
Ill thoughts start to sprout.

Hand's tremble in illusion,
The vision break's apart--
In a melody of confusion,
Envision of age old-scars.

Thy sweat pours a storm,
A turmoil to touch deep
Time strikes a marking--
Still eye's won't weep.

Finger's feel the skin--
Where comfort won't reach
Shadow cast's an hour,
Which somehow won't leave.

Dust begin to settle--
And the curtains are raised
Spewing numb on every word,
Across every page.

Moment begin to scatter,
In a place light forsake
Silence begin's to creep in--
From where dark was made.

Gloom becomes heavy--
Engulfs everything in haze
Conscience finds a noose,
And makes itself a cage.

Hurt infects every corner,
Balm as pure as dew
All steps lead to temptations--
And they pay their due's.

A puzzle fall in pieces,
Raising a few wall's
Have no clue what it means--
Or where the ghost walks.

My heart in condition,
With precision to be lost--
Heeding no indication,
One key locked inside a box.

Unfurling me a new season--
From seed's that were sowed
Made me some shade,
That always keep me so cold.

Them claws dig in my flesh--
And collect from me my soul
Mesmerised in my winter,
Bathe in asphalt and coal.

Window cease to exist,
Them walls harbor no doors
Mirror paints a stranger--
You are not what you were anymore.

Despair grows a sky,
Pour's me down a sea
Shelter won't stop--
What there is meant to be.

Dead weight drags me down,
Those arms I can't see--
Pills and the powder,
Won't set me free.

My tears bleed blood,
On my heart this loneliness feeds--
From this descent in madness,
No man can be freed.

Entangle self in chains,
When in misery one is bound
When a-top the mighty mountain--
The peak falls down.

A frown turns in dread,
In debt of all that's around
As where the dark is kept--
No man has ever been found.

Note: It might make no sense to you but that's fine.



I don't fuss over the way someone choose to cuss,
Or the god chosen to represent depravity in some of us,
I don't need to look beneath, you're too rotten on the crust,
Priest is no god, but that's where you invest all your trust
The same face-less pig who died in a **** lab,
In a stupid police bust.
But I must apologize in advance for I know,
There is no end of ******' stupidity in some of us,
Mechanical brains, new and old, filled to the brim with rust,
******* reigns, what's the harm in givin' your body some love,
God told ya so, touching your private parts will turn you to dust,
How stupid your god is, why give me a candy I can't eat ?
Tempt me by temptations, and still made me human so I can weep,
No wonder the world is going crazy, I forgot the rituals I had to keep,
Yeah, beat thy women into submission, gods one and only creed,
But what happened to the old fool, who went past the fence,
Crawled over the surface, the muscles in his **** so tense,
Ready to paint the world, in the color of his own,
Find the fertile land, and let his seeds to be sown,
Barely walking, heavily influenced by the anti-christ and blow,
What happened to that rebel, did he ever find a *** ?



Where are the mad-men and the sick-men,
Will all this depravity finally come to a ******' end ?
What about the cuss words and the torment,
Don't lie, I know you're never 'gonna have enough of them.

Where are the sick-men and the mad-men,
Something is wrong, can anyone tell what happened to them ?
My ***** is too strong to hide, I'm in need of some women
And my words have no ink for my pen-is full of *****.



Beat me to death for echoing this blasphemous myth,
Condemn me to hell, and just be done with it,
Tell me how beautiful your god is, c'mon ******' do that ****,
Scream anti-god on my face and call me sick,
All religions laid down on the table, a difficult pick,
Order me a ***** to undo my *******' zip,
Watch me hold my **** and cover your cards with ****,
The fragrance of arrogance, something you can't resist,
Ask your momma to climb over me for a perfect fit,
As i ride her to glory, watching the divinity of some ****,
yeah, I like them on all fours, I'm such a ******' narcissistic,
And yet you hate me, **** me for you're such a pacifist
As I watch your smile slowly turning into a fist,
And in mist, what do you seek, there's STD and you're at risk,
So go back to your home and complain to your god,
There's a rebel out loose and he needs to be caught,
Pick up your holy book, and remember what it taught,
Then turn it over slowly, and read the text in broad,
Holy ******' ****, that's six dollars for the words of god!


Where are the mad-men and the sick-men,
Will all this depravity finally come to a ******' end ?
What about the cuss words and the torment,
Don't lie, I know you're never 'gonna have enough of them.

Where are the sick-men and the mad-men,
Something is wrong, can anyone tell what happened to them ?
My ***** is too strong to hide, I'm in need of some women
And my words have no ink for my pen-is full of *****.

I condemn you to the deathly shadows,
Where you shall be consumed in your grief
Said the dark lord with a grin too shallow,
And the old frail man could do nothing but weep.

The burning gate to the pit of hell's dark fury,
Began to open with a noise of thousand screams
The old man laid his eyes upon where he would be buried,
And scars tore his skin with misery he had never seen.

The dark lord began to whisper the song of death,
And the world shook as if welcoming another soul
Through the ashes of the past and future he was led,
To the grave of dark where he would be mold.

The sky burst Into the flames of a dying star,
And the blood-stained rain began to fall
The time lay ever so still at the despaired hour,
Soon the under-world will devour his all.

Bearing the chains of his own depraved suffering,
The old man began to count his last wish
And the clouds of wrath lay awake and thundering,
As the vision of the old man began to harbour mist.

At Every step he fell deeper than his last sorrow,
As the blood-lust blades tore through his surface
Where ever must he go his consience wouldn't follow,
He caught himself from the storm in a withering maze.

The dark lord was now but a memory of past,
He was in the hands of a far more evil creed
His maker had given upon his soul at last,
And the mute angles could now do nothing but grieve.

The arms of age had at last freed him of his thoughts,
He was rising to a world very different from his own
In those moments of torment he was alive but lost,
And could give up every weight he borne.

The eyes were left open but he was long gone,
Like a mechanical animal he walked in daze
His thoughts weren't his own but the heart did mourn,
Tracing the walls of his grave where he was laid.

The white mountains rose above the golden lake,
And every breeze would now numb his soul
In the wonder-land of death he was made,
Only now his nightmares weren't his anymore.

But of the dark lord.

The hurt bleeds gold,
As I shine in my sivler
Watching through glass of age,
Comfortable in my winter
tears are but a reflection,
That my heart won't understand
All I have is this world,
Through the eyes of a sad man
The beauty in them scars,
Of the stars that shine in dark
Steps that lead us back,
In memories far apart
And run through this path,
With pain in our heart
And bleed them a rainbow
In every morn' numb hour
Because I have nothing to gain,
And I'm left with nothing to lose
The glass might be broken,
But I can still see through
And i hold my breath,
As I suffocate in silence
And feel the calm,
Of the deathly resistance
That I harbour so in my heart
And the world's essence,
The one I capture in my box of pain,
In a tears presence,
That remind,
How blue is the sky
From the eyes of a sad man,
As I watch my smile that hurts
And bleeds me an ocean
Watch through the cracks,
Of every doors that's broken,
And find yourself on a shelve,
Waiting to be done and sold
To the pain that we so harbour,
And weigh in gold,
make themselves an idol,
By the dreams we hold
Of how grey the page is,
With every word it molds
There is no depth of a scar,
If it kills a man
How beautiful death is,
From the eyes of a sad man.

The world will end in morrow,
And the mirror will cease to exist
Our reflections are not our own
But of a voice engulfed in mist
Direction-less we walk in disguise
From one being to another
These stains of yesterday linger on,
And then fade away and wither
Into the hollow of our thoughts
And be made in shards to cut deep
To the empty space of our Mind
And all the dirt we try to keep
There is no somebody else,
And there will be no different world
This land is yours to keep
To wear wilderness of love and hurt
One might find end in demise,
But there's no end when you're alive
You can close every door with walls
But you'll still be opened up wide
To see everything that is blind
And feel all that is hollow
For you'll be loved in pieces
And that riddle will always follow
To count your stars in heaven
And make your place in hell
'tis where your solitude lies
And 'tis where your wings fell
As an ocean betrays your pain
And waves crash in your conscience
To find yourself in fraction
As you struggle between god and science
Back and forth as you suffer
As you make an oasis by your tears
To drown away and be forgotten
And disappear before one can hear
The noise of life.

Hey yo, take a bow!
Cuz My god is 'gonna start the show
From last couple of days he's on a roll
Blood-shed, massacre's, bombs explode!
Propaganda of religion is a mind control
As guns and knives take their toll,
Watch the world burn as it un-folds
And My god is on it, like a ***** on a *****!



Mike testing..

1
.
2
.
3

Hello, hello!
Can you hear me, my dear fellow!
Let the beat drop and follow
Now take your best shot
Take me to a thrift shop and swallow,
These bitter pills of my devine power
Take a shower, calm down and be mellow,
Cuz i just trolled your god
In the match of 'who-kills-the-lot'
With the most ridiculous excuse,
And the margin was narrow
But i fed on some fanatic minds i borrowed,
From the pits of patriotism,
Coupled with some misplaced sense of nationalism
And the horror of narcissism
To arm these armies of stupid *** men,
To wage a war without any reason
Saints of '****-all-who-apply-logic' are on a mission,
To accuse any sound mind of treason,
Only crushed skulls and blood splatter this season
A truce with ***** girls and mad-hatter will bring your freedom
And the burned children
............. how can i forget the burned children!
Bearing the wrath of their god and his god-men,
But give me a pen and I'll sign the documents to annihilate all of them,
Problem solved, it's not like we have any shortage of *****!





Oh, my, my, my *******' lord,
Why hath thou forsaken ?
I know your divinity infinity,
But could you, possibly, maybe Mistaken ?
Or is it just this other God,
Afraid of your throne being taken ?
Or is it just these miserable men,
Who know only blood equation ?
Oh, my, my, my *******' lord,
Will we ever rise from this tragic situation ?





And **** thy neighbour, or enslave them for labour
Whatever you do never love them or lend them a favour
It's better to burn them if they ask for a different flavour
Let the husband die and ******* watchin' his wife die but don't you dare save her
And if you're feelin' that *****, here's the deal,
Convert her and enslave her!
And don't bother **** the ones, who try to **** you
If you don't die, all the blame will be on you,
Cuz lets pretend for a second, nobody ever truly liked you
Your momma gave birth to you out of the blues
Give up the chase, or a global hatred will ensue
And uncle Sam, who's the biggest player in the scam
But even he won't hesitate to sue,
Your bruised ****** up *** if they don't **** you,
So here's the deal,
Cut off your arms and maybe a leg,
Play the victim card and beg
Set your heart to the east and money to the west
Pretend they can't shoot you in the head if you wear a vest,
For your god will always be right, no matter how stupid he gets
And now you've killed your neighbour, his kids and daughters
Cut off your own arms and legs,
But hey, you can still **** the dead wife!
So no regrets!





Oh, my, my, my *******' lord,
Why hath thou forsaken ?
I know your divinity infinity,
But could you, possibly, maybe Mistaken ?
Or is it just this other God,
Afraid of your throne being taken ?
Or is it just these miserable men,
Who know only blood equation ?
Oh, my, my, my *******' lord,
Will we ever rise from this tragic situation ?

If you don't want me to be right,
I can't give in and be wrong
I am weak, maybe so
But what have you achieved
by being strong ?
This hand of love,
May not stand against your storm
But i must not thirst your blood,
Like you do for mine
Or these wounds won't heal
Till the end of time
But you'll never hear me,
All you've ever heard
Is a battle song,
And our scars have stretched on
Between the space,
for far too long.


We're the same,
You and me
Then why is it so hard,
for you to love me?

We live the same pain
Why not the same love
All we need is us,
To heal 'tis broken world.

Be blind to the seen,
Deaf to the screams
As you feed your own brothers,
To the **** machine.


If you can't see me,
Doesn't mean I'm blind
What will it take,
To leave every scar behind
For it'll always rust,
beneath the surface
We'll be turned to dust
And one day we'll both fade
Consumed by our ignorance,
Ignorance always fed our hate
Always ready to inflict war,
In the blank of every page
To remind us of our vengeance,
The misplaced sense of righteousness
What will you find,
In the annihilation of my soul
Your emptiness?



We're the same,
You and me
Then why is it so hard,
for you to love me?

We live the same pain
Why not the same love
All we need is us,
To heal 'tis broken world.

Be blind to the seen,
Deaf to the screams
As you feed your own brothers,
To the **** machine.


If you don't love me
Is it too much to ask,
Not to hate
How far will you last,
Before your monsters
Turn on you instead
I'm no saint,
But I'll still take your bait
To follow your lead,
And break down the walls you made
Douse myself in your flavour,
To taste your shade
Live in your nightmare
And find my self awake
Would you feel the same,
If i wanted an eye for eye
Would you
Then love me,
If i wanted a partition in the sky ?


We're the same,
You and me
Then why is it so hard,
for you to love me?

We live the same pain
Why not the same love
All we need is us,
To heal 'tis broken world.

Be blind to the seen,
Deaf to the screams
As you feed your own brothers,
To the **** machine.

People are stupid,
People are dumb
'tis world is a cage
How far will you run?.

People are you,
People are someone
'tis world's a mirror
Are you holdin' a gun?.

Chasin' the bullets,
Are you gettin' numb?
'tis world is a circus,
When you're the strange one.

And so many whispers,
To count your scars
Ghosts are just people
Who have no heart.

Fed to the winds,
Those conquer these walls
Free-will is an illusion
That infects one and all.

People are slaves,
people are king
A deaf mute bird,
Who got no wings.

People are outside,
People are within  
So many flavours
But the same skin.

Cuttin' through edges,
Finding a way in
People are a temple,
A crowd of sin.

And so many screams,
To shout your wager
'tis world's a carnival
When you're a stranger.  

To wither in ashes,
Of an army of people
A needle's poison,
That keeps goin' deeper.


People are stupid,
People are dumb
'tis world is a cage
How far will you run?.

People are you,
People are someone
'tis world's a mirror
Are you holdin' a gun?.

Chasin' the bullets,
Are you gettin' numb?
'tis world is a circus,
When you're the strange one.

He walks upon silver moon-light,
Dancing upon an ocean of stars
Seeking truth in age of darkness,
Wishing upon every morbid scar
To see through burning curtains,
As they fall back into the flames
Blind to what is beyond the stage,
All he can do is see his only pain

That hears the song of night,
Of the dark and dreams untold
Bled of all that there is to hold,
Love is gone and tears are cold


He melts away into the unknown,
To be made in a whispering bird
Circling along the edge of the sky,
Trying to forget their every word
That cuts right through his skin,
Deep into his ever burning Soul
As he dives into the empty sky,
That'll slowly swallow him whole

Drowning in the song of night,
Into an abyss of suffering and pain
There won't be no more dreams
As the dreamer lies buried again


He is feeling the wrath of sorrow,
That falls on him like winter's rain
Searching for a man in the mirror,
But all that reflects is just a name
To be seen across all the universe,
camouflaged in the empty space
To tread where ever the heart is,
And to always find self in a maze

Slowly filling with the song of night,
Empty puddles are full to the brim
They will combust all that is must,
If they take anymore of tears within


He floats in an ocean of dread,
Consumed in his own pagan guilt
To feel the rust in his loneliness,
With walls of solitude he built  
And to be made a cage of lies,
That lay trap to the hidden wait
Bearing the stains of disguise,
There is no otherside of this gate

Wanting the song of night,
To grant him his key to freedom
And be the king of his own self,
Be the master of a lost kingdom


He wants the dark of the night,
To remind him what he once knew
And find him a trail to otherside,
So he can finally pay his devils due
And to be not forgotten by time,
As he moves back to the unknown
To burn and fade after every step,
And break fire with sparks borne

Made in the song of night,
A tale of dark to be left to brew
Deep in the pit of boiling lies
Finding one lie that will be true


He rots away in a depraved corner,
To be found again in heavens lair
And neglect questions as they come,
To find those answers every-where
In midst of an approaching storm,
That brings fear to guide his prey
To have wings but no direction
And every wave takes 'em away  

finding the song of night,
In the hollow of empty reason
To be swept away in illusion
And find self in a different season


He knows the embrace of winds,
Slowly caressing his lonely walls
crawl back to surface from within,
Back from the dead to take a fall
And seep through the cracks in time,
To a place that's in abandoned hope
To be gone forever when awake,
Fall back dead and find no road

Walking in the song of night,
In rhythm with words spoken
To be held against a morbid tear,
And be flooded by an ocean


He rests upon a bed of thorns,
To find comfort in his only hurt
painted in blood-stained flavour,
A withered rose to kiss every word
that die in the chaos of thoughts,
Running dry with every breath
That lay claim upon his nightmares,
To echo silence of a moments death

Melting in the song of night,
Hanging on a crooked wire
That swings by the frozen time,
Cast into a face of ice and fire


He wounds himself of love,
For the love of everything black
Memories that were left to haunt,
A door that won't lead him back
But to an ocean of nothingness,
Where he'll be one with his pain
To be made whole in emptiness,
And find self at a crossroad again

To see the song of night,
Gliding through the night sky
Woven in silvery threads,
A touch that'll miss the eye


He dissolves in the poisonous fumes,
Of the haze that blinds the sun-light
Falling back in fragments of his own,
Searching for another puzzle to hide
And find comfort in a broken mirror,
A thousand faces made to scream
What of a dreamer without a night,
A lonely place to be alive and dream

Singing the song of night,
Till the dawn of the morn' hour
To the world of lost dreams,
Of the stars and a broken heart

To Sing the song of night,
On every step that leads him afar
From the ruins of his home,
Sunrise falling back to his heart

I will never wear a smile,
With these morbid words on my lips
Trapped inside my mind,
And I may not ever escape from it
Broken pieces of my being,
That somehow never did fit
Knocking on heavens door
As I take another hit
Moment of truth is gone,
Wish It had taken me with it
Left behind a string of lies,
Cutting me open with shards and bits
No more will I seek sunrise,
sun has fallen back to the abyss
As I walk on the road of mayhem,
every star in the sky is now lit
I burn with wrath of a million stars,
As they shine upon my scars
No more will I seek the azure
As I hold the night sky in my heart,
A blanket of dark for my tears,
That fall from the heavens lair  
But with every dusk you can hear,
On-set of my bleeding nightmares
You can run from me in the sun,
But in shadows you'll find me there
You can run from me in the day,
But at night i'll be everywhere
You could fight me when I was in pain
But how will you fight my emptiness
There's no where you can hide from me,
For I am, always will be, your darkness.

Conquer, these souls you so want to torture
Give me my pills and watch me turn into a monster
Come here gran, where you off to?; I want to torch her
And all you gentlemen, just jerking off, do you concur ?
I would have smacked your *** off the table if it was a contest
So go ahead, take your time, demonstrate a protest
And there is no time to explain, hell, i'm in pain
Take a name and I would really want her
Yeah, it's bad, blowin' a pipe, i'm goin' mad
Running around naked with a pound of ******* in my bag-pack
It's real sad, if you think about it
I'm trying to hammer a nail in my ******' head
But I can't find no way around it
Wrap around it, act astounded, it's funny how you responded
When I told you it was your momma, last night I pounded
And you're two ****** short, man I counted
Why you bring me an asian all the time ?
When I specially told you it was a blonde one I wanted
And there's no way i'm 'gonna stop once you've mounted
And it's not my fault you leave every girl so disappointed
*** is spooky ****, I swear that **** is so haunted
And you made me cry, the way you just taunted
I'll just ignore you 'cause I know you were born bad-mouthed
If you think you can convert me, I seriously doubt it
Enough done, enough said, you **** man and I don't want to hear about it





Oh, don't you mess with me boy
I can bet you it's something you won't enjoy
I'll drown your screams with my noise
And when I leave, i'll leave you destroyed  
Your silly tactics; with me you can't employ
It's your own fault if I leave you paranoid
A stand-off with me is something you should avoid
For when i'm done with you, you'll be destroyed




You twerk even worse than the goddess miley
Now shake that *** for me ***** and scream loudly
Show me you ain't dead and take a swing at me wildly
As I give you a dose of my karate chops; mildly
And show the world how you lost your front teeth proudly
Hush, now little girl, daddy's 'gonna sing you a lullaby finally
I know you got some daddy issues, here take some tissues
The ones I came in just a while ago
Baby, you've got some great ****, is there where you keep all your ego ?
Take it slow, it's a no show, how 'bout you and me do some blow ?
And watch these half assed punks as they come and go
And daddy can tell, you still havn't learned to spell
Was it the thirteenth floor from where you fell
Head-first to the ground and was that when they found,
That you are a ****** and life is no video game you can just re-start
And it makes me sick, when they call your boring rhymes an art
You lack imagination and that's why it never felt so hard
But step in my shoes, ******* blues and they'll shred you in a thousand pieces apart
But for all it's worth, i'll always be the first to smear myself in dirt  
And how are those tears forming in your eyes, do they hurt ?
But I forgive you, 'cause that's what a bigger man always does
And offcourse I am talking about my ****, you ****!

A hollow heart bleeds
Nothingness and pain
To be swallowed deep
And fall like the rain

And empty vase of life
Holds onto the dead leaves
Somewhere in the depth
To be buried down and deep  

Made into a seed
Of the corpses and the cold
With tales and sorrows
And a thousand scars untold

To be made a rotten tree
With rotten fruits and stars
To stand alone in disguise
Bare, with a poisoned heart

Branches span till the moon
Beyond the clouds and sky
In the depth of hollow space
Where the dark meets the eye

To feed shade to the night
In shadows and reflections
Breathe in the cold abyss
That hides in every direction

Waiting for a bleeding heart
To make his way across
And sleep in his chamber
To be made a ghost when lost

And rise above the mountains
To meet the azure up high
Of demons and questions
And answers made in lies

To be stretched in emptiness
Far beyond the ruins of a man
Asleep within clouds of darkness
And forever be cursed and ******  

A hollow heart bleeds
Nothingness and pain
To be swallowed deep
And fall like the rain

It's 4:31 am and I'm sitting alone, more dead than alive
I watch as darkness invades the moon, a tear falls from my eye

Old stains of hurt, left on these blank pages to remind where i am
Lost, in despair and so cold that sometimes i forget i am a man

Not just a shadow that i see falling across the room on a wall
Cursing my life, for making me who i am and destroying it all

4:35 am, and it feels like days and weeks have passed by
I don't remember much, i have no clue why i started to cry

It's been always there, inside of me and it feeds on my pain
Winter turns to spring, spring to summer and fall, but it never change

4:40 am, i pick up the blade and poke my wrists
I made it this far and i can't carry on, i have to end it

I remember being happy when i was young, i remember being sad
Being alone on birthdays, 'cause there was no friend i had

I remember having fun on the beach, going mad in the snow
And all this while i was decaying inside, i just didn't know

I knew what love felt like, but i could never replace it with pain
I could never fit in, i was the odd one out, a ******, 'the strange'

4:57 am, i feel the urge to **** myself increasing every minute
I pick up my gun and start putting bullets in it

I can still walk away, if i can make it through this night
But the demons have consumed me, I'm just too weak to fight

I know I'll hurt many people, people who still care
I don't know what to do, i can't find my strength anywhere

I know i've let you down and you were always there for me dad
And it makes it so much more unbearable, that mom, i can never get you back

5:11 am, i guess the only time i smiled was when i was with you my lil' sis
I wish i could take you to the park one last time, there's so much I'm 'gonna miss

I wish i can turn this noise down, which compels me to pull the trigger
But i can see who i am, who i will be clearly in this mirror

I don't want to live in pain, i don't want to be like this
Enough of these lies, therapy and pills, I'm full of that ****

It's the only way out, but i know life can still turn around
Everyone has a story, they don't die and one day they're found

But what if, i won't ever be?, I'll regret i let this moment go to waste  
For i know I'll never do it again, if i don't now, it's a lifetime of wait

I'll die with nothing but hate, at least i can feel the love today  
I don't want to lose that too, get old and die anyway

I don't want them to remember me as a monster, but as a man
Who loved them in his own way, but i know they won't understand

5:30 am, i wish i had been the son you always wanted and couldn't have
Even though you love me, you deserved better than me dad

Lil' sis, i was there when you were born, the most beautiful thing i had ever seen
You'll always be my angel, you and i have always been a great team, sweet dreams

I wish i was there by your side mom, when you took your last breath
You know i loved you, but i felt betrayed when you told me you're 'gonna be dead

I just want to die, i can't shut down the voices in my head
It's been weeks and months and i haven't slept

5:40 am, i pick up the gun, i know what i have to do
I'm sorry sis' but i guess from now on it's 'gonna be just dad and you

6:00 am, sweat trickles down my forehead, I'm afraid and scattered
Maybe I'll meet you soon mom, if there is someplace better

Finger on the trigger, i know it's time for me to leave
I won't let pain take over, i have to put it to sleep









door opens















Little Leslie - yaaawwn.... You forgot to wake me up! Who's 'gonna...... WHAT is that timmy ?









Timmy - I'm sorry but i have to...





















(minutes pass by)








Little Leslie - ok, go ahead, do whatcha 'gotta do, but...... remember you're leaving me all alone by myself, mom is gone now..... and dad barely speaks, all i had was... you,now.... you can too leave!






Timmy - i don't know what to do..  












Little Leslie - just come down and make me breakfast, I'm late for school








(moments pass in complete silence)










Timmy - Leslie.... (starts crying)...i'm sorry i won't....even think about it....... ever again, i....i..i promise!









Leslie - you know i love you and so does dad








Timmy- i know, i love you more than anything









Leslie - than just be my annoying older bro and dads pain-in-the-*** son, it will get better, and that's my promise!








timmy puts the gun down and takes her in his arms, smiling while tears trickle down his eyes and says " how about some ice-cream for breakfast today, princess ?"





































It's 6:31 am and the sun is beginning to rise.

What do we seek in truth,
When lies can do a better job
How pretty are illusions,
From the eyes of a corpse
Monsters hiding in disguise
camouflaged in words
What if we change the spin
Will it run in an opposite world
Changing the lanes by name
Won't the journey end the same
And if we close eyes to dreams
Will it stop the colours to change
every answer is another question
What's there left to ask
If i eyes can glow in the dark
What's the need to wear a mask
It takes a lifetime to understand
What regret can do to a grave
Why don't we wipe away years
In tears cleansing words on a slate
This hand will forever rest
On the other side of our wall
But a tear will always find a way
Come back to us to ruin us all
More memories then we can keep
Lay dead upon wings of time
Won't know where this may lead
If one can't read the hidden signs
Not every door will have a key
Some only open to one face
If the clouds don't let them be
Every star in the sky will fade
When the ocean did break
Old fossils all they could see
And a tide so was made
Quickly turning over in a sea
No more riddles hidden in pieces
Slowly becoming someone else
Sometimes one find it reaches
A place it can make a snowman melt
One day sunshine will kiss farewell
To land where we thought we are
you will find that it always dwelled
In the shadows of a billion stars

You don't have to be someone else than who you are,
There're so many people out there trying to fit in
Good and the bad, all different corners of your heart
You won't ever be satisfied if you're not comfartable in your own skin

__________


My gears run in the opposite direction, they say I'm just a sucker for the right connections,
stare at me long enough and it's gonna' be a fatal attraction, confessions, spilling out faster than i can mention that i am a *******' slave to the latest inventions,
no harm in livin' your life like it's gonna' end in a second, pay heed to the temptations spreading out like an infection,
eats you inside and out, there was never gonna' be a question if i pay them sinners for my own destruction,
and all is lost and buried after the eruption,
corrupting my soul as i **** another door to make amendments, but my intentions are rockin' a ******* *******
separating the core and mixing it with what you're told and givin' a new complexion
and you're not 'gonna stop till you can be the source of their affection, no reflection of who you are,you're just a projection of all the things they perceive as imperfection,
and you'll make it an obsession and won't even object when they seal the deal with your objection,
It's never gonna' be enough,you'll never be able to get their attention, get recognition the way you are, they're always 'gonna be one step away from redemption,
and you're always gonna' be a step too close to taste their aggression, and you'll never be the master of your own actions, unless you can find a source to your own expressions,
tension in the atmosphere, every moment will feel like a nightmare until you can find the right connections,
and be done with the visual perceptions, failing to realise, lies they feed you and take you to the point of intersection of their deception,
and don't be too sad if you face rejection, 'cause the society is 'gonna keep putting pressure and give you all the instructions to function
and there's gonna' be no satisfaction unless you break out, shout out loud, tell them all about how beautiful it is to dysfunction

Woke up to the sunrise, my heart still craves the night
Drowning in an ocean of misery, escaping the bright lights
The demon inside has won, I've given up any hope to fight
If I'm going down this path, i might just enjoy the ride

In this silence, over-grown sense of hatred consumes my soul
I wait for the end, trying to figure out a way to end it all
I could never figure out, what does it takes to make you whole
And maybe i was just holding back, i was always destined to fall

__________

"hey, mom do you have to go to work today?"
-sorry sweetie, i have to rush and i guess I'll be late
"seriously, i thought we'll spend some time together, we talked about it yesterday"
-i know, but it's important, maybe next Sunday?
"it's alright, nevermind anyway"
-you know how much i love you, don't you ?
"yes, i know mom, be back soon, I have a surprise for you today"
-I'll be back as soon as i can, ok sweetie?
"alright, I'll wait for you like always"

*door closes


_________

Alone with my thoughts, emotions explodes in silence
Mind in chaos, every approaching moment is violent
Angst and despair spreads neatly all across the floor
Eyes are closed and i think i can't take it anymore

It's not so easy to die, every moment I'm hoping for a miracle
Someone or something to pull me back from my doom
But i guess, world has ignored my pleas again
And i can't let go of these morbid thoughts approaching like winters gloom


_________

"hey, Todd do you have a second, i just need to talk"
-yeah, mate what is it ?
"i don't feel good, can you come over or not ?"
-man, I'm with this *******, we're out on a walk
"oh, haha alright, have fun, catch you later"
- I'll tell you all about it. god, this chick is so hot!
"haha alright, catch you later"

you can talk to my Corpse

_____________________________

Can they really not hear the fear in your voice ?
You try so hard to get out, but they leave you no choice
Maybe when they find you're gone, they'll make some noise
Will they feel responsible, for they couldn't keep you from being destroyed

I walk away from these walls of my so called home
I think it's better if i go away and do this alone
Friends, family, they'll make an excuse that they didn't knew
He was such a good kid, just a little bit confused


_____________________________


-young man, what are you doing alone in this park?
"none of your business, leave me alone"
-you shouldn't wander alone in these lonely parts
"i don't need you to tell me what to do, it's not even after dark"
- are you searching for someone, there's no one out far
"no, i just want to be alone, if it's too much to ASK!"
- come here, have a seat, don't be afraid i won't hurt you
"hahah, do you really think I'm scared of you?"
-no, but i think you need someone to talk to
"no, I'm better off alone, sorry but i don't need you"
-wait, young fellow, just hear me out?
"does it matter, you have no clue what it's all about"
- no harm in letting it all out, for you and me are the same
"are we really, you don't seem to be in pain !"
- i was, a long time ago, just like you i was cold
"hmmm, stay away from strangers, that's what i was always told"
-I'm not a stranger, I'm just the older self of you
"wait, slow down old man, you're just making me confused"
-I'm here to tell you what you'll miss if you don't turn around
"what? How do you know i was about..."
- i know how you feel, like everything is going down
"hey, wait a minute......."
-but I'm here to tell you, one day you'll be found  
"but, it feels like that day will never come "
-just look at you, what you've become
"i can't stop it, it has already begun"
-there will be no escape,no matter how far you run
"..........."
-it will be better, i swear, one day you'll find that someone
" i don't think i ever will "
-you're too young, I'm old and i can tell you i did
"but we're not the same........"
-yes, we are
"hey, wait where're you going, what's your name?"
-if you decide to turn around, I'll meet you tomorrow here again
"what makes you so sure, my thoughts will change"
-i don't know for sure, but i would really like to meet you again..

walks back home


later in the night



"hey, what's up todd?"
-oh man, remember about that chick, the one hot?
"yeah, what's up with her"
-turns out she has even a hotter sister
"hmmmm"
-she wants to meet you, i showed her your picture
"what the hell?"
-yeah mate, she wants to meet you tomorrow at the cafe, about twelve
"woah, ah well...."
-just shut up, you thought i would just leave you behind
".........."
-we're friends mate, sorry i couldn't talk earlier, i was fixing your date at that time
"hmmm, it's alright"
-ok mate, good night
"night, night"



even later


"hey, mom look i made you some dinner"
- oh baby, what a sweet surprise
"mom, why do you have tear in your eyes?"
-it's nothing, i felt bad about going to work today
"don't worry mom, it's okay"
-no, it's not, so i took tomorrow off
"eh, why?"
-well, i planned something, just you and me, up for it or not?







__________

-so, young man you made it
"yeah, guess i did"
-there will be more like me down the road
"hmm, what your name, old man?
-well,my friends call me hope.

***, why do you have to speak like that?



It's not about who I am, you piece of worthless ****, why don't you understand?
I am basically undestructible, invincible  sexier version of Superman, and I don't got no moral ******' codes to keep me from beating your ugly *** up all over the I-don't-give-a-**** wonder land
But I know you'll take a stand, your every failed attempt is killin' me, are you ******' kidding me, you know how it'll turn out for you, oh danm!
Now I gotta' explain it to you, that annihilating you is a part of my ******' plan and you can take all of my '**** yous' , call the poetry protection people and try to sue, but i'll **** even harder than a ******' rock band, it's all your ******' fault, you pull the trigger and out comes a '****'- BAM, I know you're not a fan, but lemme ask you, what's your age my sweet gran, I know I include you too often,but why aren't you in a coffin, why do you keep poppin around, stoppin me from talkin about my feelings, you ******' *****, imma introduce you to my lil' freind, brings-you-the-end-uncle sam and he'll **** out all the oil, leave you to boil, in the sand, I hope you understand, this is important, and i'll say a '****' again, for no reason, have a short attention span, can't you see a ******* gettin' a ***** on my hand, I wonder how long will it be stayin and so, you were sayin' ?


Why do you cuss so much, *******?


I ain't gonna' feed you no crap, you have my '**** yous' and I just want 'em back, I swear I won't even set a trap, to count how many knives you have on your back, go ahead spill the blood, embrace the dirt, be the first to stab, just then don't stop me, when I start to blab, go mad, be bad, and be the contender, in line for your hardest slap, being a repeated offender, I tell you, it's the most fun i ever had, it's not the vocabulary that I lack, it's just every time I read about your ******' butterflies and sun-light I go mad, so you take your stuff, all of it, all of your hatin' and waitin' for takin' a jibe at the next '****' and stuff it all inside your bag, go ahead be on your way, now, ******' pack, or I swear they'll find your corpse, in the parking lot, where you sacrificed the young folks, and covered all their '*******' tracks, and i'll wait here for you, plannin' my next ******' attack, I know all these cussing and abusing has made you sad, but why don't you just ignore me, does it turns you on, when I shoot one after one '****' in the sack, do you really think putting your food out in the open  makes sense in a bachelor pad , I know my metaphors aren't funny, but it'll make a very sick man somewhere crack, and when everything's been said and done, i'll leave ****** karma to kick you in your hypocrite ***, there I said it, '*******' I swear this one's the last, for it may seem i'm just a punk for usin' it but you're confusin' ****, and there goes the answer to your question you just asked.


*******!

Douse me in your flavour
Pour on me your colours
Burn me inside and out,  
Watch me as I suffer

Quell my thirst by yours
Fill me with all you desire
Hold me, tell me I'm beautiful
And then push me in the fire

Scar me with all your love
Your love, that keeps me alive
Eat me from inside out
go ahead, I'm all yours take a bite



Confuse me, you're all I have  
So much in love, i'm all yours
Consume me, take all I have
Feed on me if it makes you whole



Piece by piece, i'll fade
I'll be yours sweet escape
Of the love world forbade
Your love is worth my wait

Take me in, deep within
Where light won't reach
Take away my wings
So I can never leave

Forever yours, I promise
Waste me with all your love
Hidden away from myself
Keep me blind from my curse



Consume me, take all I have
Feed on me if it makes you whole
Control me, you're all I have  
So much in love, i'm all yours

__________


Look at me and fill the gap, ever wondered, if these empty spaces are just a trap?

If I was you, I won't ever come back, what have I, in these silenced moments which you lack ?  

If you ever tried, why not just kiss it good-bye, is life not enough to make you want to die?

Escape them lies, if you know how to fly, do you think you'll find any wings in the night sky?  



Let my heart rip, ain't no where I'll ever fit
Lit, with fire on the bed of wax where I sit
Won't get rid, of who I am, even though you want it
Leave me be and i'll leave you Disappointed



Take my pain and change my name, look in the mirror, is everything still the same ?

I wait in shame, come again, smear me in your scent, don't you want me to take your blame?

I knew you would ask, if I wear a mask,  what of solitude, if the disguise won't last ?

Look past, what you want me to be, what you see, will it be enough if i break your heart ?


Do you ever feel confused,  when I refuse,
To be made in hurt, when you abuse
Of the lonely nights, when i make love to you
i know what i need, bleed the tears you so wanted
Leave me be, and I'll leave you disappointed


Where these scars lead, a place where i can never be, and if you can see beyond, do you find me ?

I don't want you to leave, but i want you be freed, if i break these promises, will you breathe ?

I know what i was made, an image you couldn't take, will you collect all the pieces when i break ?

Will you wait, i won't come and you'll be late, is that all there is to us, disappointment at every gate ?


I will always be here, trapped in these walls where i dreamt it,
A life with you, without you, these dreams, i don't want it
But all i am, reflection of your man, i am not who i was, understand
Get away from me, run far away from me, while you can
You won't find me in love, with your hurt i'm haunted
I can't face my demons, made in a ghost, this escape i never wanted
Leave me be, and I'll leave you disappointed

__________
________­


You won't find me in your dreams, if you dream with open eyes,
Make no noise, let it be gone, when every moment dies
Don't hold me back, I'll blind you with nothing but more lies
And even though i try, i know one day I'll leave without saying goodbye
And you'll be alone, forever trapped in your heart of stone
Withering away, as you try to bring every wall down
But i won't be around, i know this is not what you wanted
Will you still dream, if one day you woke up disappointed ?


If nothing else, take my memory and run away, far away from me
And leave me behind, so you can still be with me
And all these scars and wounds that you'll leave behind, will change me
All those lies, in your eyes, every memory of you will strangle me
From now till eternity, till i return, will you wait for me ?
If i leave you with nothing but pain, will you be able to forgive me ?
If this void is too much to bear, will you fear that you won't find me ?
If everything i am, rusts to nothing, will you still want me ?
If one day you're here no more, leave me a sign that you waited
Will you still love me, If all i have, my every breath, every word that escapes, my thoughts that fade, what we ever had and made, if all you ever wanted, my love for you, left you disappointed?

___________

Look at me and fill the gap, ever wondered, if these empty spaces are just a trap?

If I was you, I won't ever come back, what have I, in these silenced moments which you lack ?  

If you ever tried, why not just kiss it good-bye, is life not enough to make you want to die?

Escape them lies, if you know how to fly, do you think you'll find any wings in the night sky?  



Let my heart rip, ain't no where I'll ever fit
Lit, with fire on the bed of wax where I sit
Won't get rid, of who I am, even though you want it
Leave me be and i'll leave you Disappointed



Take my pain and change my name, look in the mirror, is everything still the same ?

I wait in shame, come again, smear me in your scent, don't you want me to take your blame?

I knew you would ask, if I wear a mask,  what of solitude, if the disguise won't last ?

Look past, what you want me to be, what you see, will it be enough if i break your heart ?


Do you ever feel confused,  when I refuse,
To be made in hurt, when you abuse
Of the lonely nights, when i make love to you
i know what i need, bleed the tears you so wanted
Leave me be, and I'll leave you disappointed

In the hour of slumber,
Shine of the stars conquer
Every nook and corner
Of my fragile Mind

Mute queen sings,
A gush of dream it brings
Give me my wings
In Lullabies of serene silence

I wake in wonders
My heart surrender
I can touch the thunder
With my eyes


I see
What I am
In the
Moon-light
That falls
On the ocean

I see
What I am
In the
Shine of stars
That holds this
Door open


In this moment of calm,
I raise my arms
Floating in the storm
Of my imagination

Made into a maze,
Every turn amaze
Of the worlds face
I can glance into

Brought back to life,
These puzzles won't survive
A memory of night
I could never keep



I believe
I am
But a traveller
Running through
This paradise
Alone

I believe
I am
But a dream
In night sky
I found
My home

Even the air breaks down to sing
As a noise cracks open his skin
No escape even though bell rings
He's trapped with me within
There's a smile on my face,
As he struggles to breath
Maybe today is my day
He won't yell at me to leave
Enlight me with your words,
Poke me where it will hurt
Tell me I am so insane
Look in my eyes, i'm so deranged
I brought my friend along
I caress and it breaks in a song
This class is 'gonna be so long
Now it's your turn to be wrong
All my rage I brought for you
In Every hour that you wasted
My grades were never so high
In every question I ever tasted  




I climb on he pulls the ladder
There's evil in this weather
Every problem has a solution
In equations of blood splatter

Every answer will now be better
Never Mind that evil proffesor
Every derivation has an outcome
On the strings of blood splatter




I will replace ink with blood
And smear it all across this page
Write a hundred times 'i'm so bad'
And all across your ****** face
Tell me to stand up, I dare
Pick me to be your little *****
Make me understand why I care
I learned with precison to slit
Your hands inside my pants
My hands on your throat
No fun for you today
Today you'll take my load
Tell me i'm ****** one more time,
And I swear it won't be neat
It won't be neat anyhow (haha)
But you sure don't want to repeat
Wherever this lesson may lead
My Mind will now be freed  
From your books and grip
I'm no more just a bad seed




I climb on he pulls the ladder
There's evil in this weather
Every problem has a solution
In equations of blood splatter

Every answer will now be better
Never Mind that evil proffesor
Every derivation has an outcome
On the strings of blood splatter




This is beginning to feel like,
It's 'gonna run for-ever
A never ending lecture
With me and my gun together
And i'm 'gonna stab everyone now
So much for being the loner
Them cheerleaders and jocks
Even the **** addicts and stoners
Lesson of life from the dead
Final chapter of their semester
Now's the time, i'm 'gonna start
Pay attention to the professor
I'm 'gonna show you how to die
And everyone will score an 'A'
Be on your knees, there's no god
I'll **** the ones first who pray
It's so much more fun than maths
Don't you agree my dead friends
No more science and history  
For you'll be history in the end





I climb on he pulls the ladder
There's evil in this weather
Every problem has a solution
In equations of blood splatter

Every answer will now be better
Never Mind that evil proffesor
Every derivation has an outcome
On the strings of blood splatter



as I pull the sweet trigger,
vibrations through my veins
kiss my pretty *******
I remember every name
A nice way to let it all out
As they scream and shout
I'm 'gonna be on news momma
And you'll tell them all about,
How you never knew who I am,
Who I was, no more a man
A rock and black metal fan
A ****** no one could understand
For every ghost who feels weak
I'll show them who we really are
As another town falls asleep
I'll wake up in someones heart
I'll be on the front page,
I'll be the talk of every town
A curse kept in the closet
That every few years come around




I climb on he pulls the ladder
There's evil in this weather
Every problem has a solution
In equations of blood splatter

Every answer will now be better
Never Mind that evil proffesor
Every derivation has an outcome
On the strings of blood splatter

Don't deny me my share,
Of the sorrow and pain you so hide
Give me all your love
And the hurt deep within your eyes

Let me take a stand,
And fall all over again in your lies
Let me take your hand
And show you what's kept inside

In my box of tears and scars,
An abyss that swallows all i keep
In the wake of a million stars
While my wrists silently weeps  

Stare in the mirror,
Can you not see what lies beyond
With your every whisper
Why don't you bring that blade along

Draw on me what you see,
Let the pain run it's course
Bear wounds, and let it be
And ask, What is it all worth for


To be made into ashes,
That swirl in 'tis moon-light
A gush of wind and solitude
A tunnels end has no light

As we walk towards morrow,
With handful of yesterday we keep
Every step is met by thorns
As my wrists silently weeps




Let it be known,
When they see our red
Of what we held inside
A part of their regret
In this maze me walk,
Every wall towers high
We gave birth to our corpse
In the dead of 'tis night
Not to be left alone,
In a hope to be alive
We kissed the blade,
In a hope to survive
But ghosts never hear,
The otherside of our tale
In 'tis land of the fallen
The brave one we so hail

Gone in a whisper,
Words pay no heed to the voice
In a deep slumber, to die
Stains of failure ever so moist
Keep distance and fall,
The pit will consume our soul
In 'tis journey to sun-rise
The clouds will devour us all
Charred pieces of stone,
What's left of our heart
Pushed in every direction
And being slowly ripped apart





Don't keep me from self,
There's no one else i made
With time and in rain
All but me will fade

Let me meet my maker,
Ever so if it's just star-dust
In the hollow of my dreams
Where lullabies never rust


Hold my love for me,
As i struggle to be freed  
For-ever in this chaos
As my wrists silently weeps

To be made of dark,
No flickering light shall ever betray
In the black of my eyes
Where all that ever lived is gray

Stab me where i left,
Bring me back from the dead
Burn me to melt my name
As i exhale self with every breath

'tis world knows no end,
Every road speaks in circles
Every word travels in disguise
And every scar screams ******

Yet, they'll come when we're gone,
Every one of them who're asleep
In the wake of a million stars
As my wrists silently weeps

Words are hard to come by,
As i sit alone in my memories
Maybe, it's all gone from my eyes
But it's all i have left to see
It howls through the ashes,
As the fumes burn my skin
Walking through these broken doors
But there's nothing left within
Faces forgotten and gone,
But voices will never leave
I hear it when I'm alone,
It hurts sometimes when i bleed
An ocean of sun-rise,
A tear drop be made in sea
Taste the saline fume
And let this world be
To an unknown land,
Take my hand and disappear
Through this madness
A new age will appear

Take a hammer and poke a hole
Familiar sting all over again
Drunk wizard dances on a pole
too high to even re-call his name

'tis drunken night will shine-on,
Magic of the stars will wither  
You and me all alone  
In illusion of the drunk wizard


It's too lost to be old,
Where i once buried my tears
The long walk to home,
Left behind so many years

Now i wake beneath the sky,
And i can see it haven't changed
Where horizon meets our lies
Sun is hidden behind our stains

To be made into ashes,
Sulphur fumes still burn the skin
Black mass that won't return
As I inhale the smoke in

To be left in moments
Too slow to reach the end
I will end up just like you
To be yours forever my friend

And i'll leave nothing behind
What have I to call mine?
These winds won't leave a sign,
Of the old rotten time


Take a hammer and poke a hole
Familiar sting all over again
Drunk wizard dances on a pole
too high to even re-call his name

'tis drunken night will shine-on,
Magic of the stars will wither  
You and me all alone  
In illusion of the drunk wizard


Ice falls in the ocean,
To be made into a sea
We conquered the mountains
But we could never see
What lies beyond the horizon
Where sky meets our lies
depths of the known someone
Reflecting from our eyes
In the clear of the dawn
We shall meet our demise
Too afraid of the dark,
Another night shall rise
Ever beating of a ghost heart,
Against the sound of age
curtains will burn to the ground
And our echo will fade
All there will be left,
Will be a bag full of regret
Magic will turn to dust
And all the illusions will be bled


Take a hammer and poke a hole
Familiar sting all over again
Drunk wizard dances on a pole
too high to even re-call his name

'tis drunken night will shine-on,
Magic of the stars will wither  
You and me all alone  
In illusion of the drunk wizard

Time flies past like an uncaged bird,
Into the blue skies lest it unfurls
All of these lies that i've hold onto
will come back one day and hurt

Where was I walking to,
What is that I'm walking away from
Everything I knew was right here
A moment of truth and it's all gone

Why can't I be the man in the mirror,
Why does this world keeps its lies
I try so hard to hear your whispers
But every word escapes my eyes

Why did I lead myself to this place,
It still pains that no one understands
Is it so easy to believe my face,
And not to be seen for who I am

Be gone like the thunder in the sky,
A flash of light and a roar that'll die
I am here today like I always was
And I still have no clue why

The layers of disguise won't ever melt,
And the mask will change with every breath
I know nothing remains the same,
Why is it so easy to remember and so hard to forget

I see the world through its scars,
Torn and left to rot in my heart
I try to hold on to these winds,
As they try to rip me apart

Now all that's left is just me,
these wounds that'll never heal
with every step I lose myself  
And I know morrow I won't even feel

It's gone just like it came,
Only to leave memories behind
Now I don't know where I am,
Maybe somewhere no one can find

There's no comfort in this solitude,
Of what I have craved for so long
Mute as it is, world never cries
This silence makes me feel so alone

And now i'm back to where I belong,
At the edge of my own, I crawl
Everytime I find the key to be free
I run straight ahead into another wall

As I let go of the last string,
Of which binds me to my own
I know i'll wake up the same
I know I will be gone

Come back and haunt me once more,
Lie to me that I am of this world
Make me see through these mirrors
Take me away form where I lurk

And for the last time make me feel,
It's been so long since i've felt
Life running through my veins
I've lived far too long in this hell

Let me walk till the end,
Even if I never make it back
I've lost everything else
This journey is all I have


This journey is all we ever have

"stop, Avi you make no sense,
What is so wrong with you, eh
when will you understand?!
You, your words are chaos
You don't write poetry,
you write crap man!"


That's how it is, I am but a kid,
My words make no sense,
My thoughts?
They say i've to get rid of it
The world outside maybe cruel,
But I thought i'll be whole with the ones my kind,
But no!
To them i'm just someone with no depth in his rhymes
Maybe I never read enough,
So my words don't echo the dead voices
I just began to write when I first learned to spell
But again I never had many choices
I tried to break away from the herd,
Those rules and conventions never held me down,
But they always found faults in my method,
Made me turn around


"wait, Avi haha what is this ?
Do these words even mean a thing ?
Your poems are so bad,
Mate, you are good for nothing
And what's up with this one over here,
Do you think anyone will read it ?
Even if they did by mistake,
Don't you think they'll find it stupid ?


He walks on the lonely trails,
Forgotten with passage of time
Every sight is a word,
Painting a picture in his Mind
He picks a blade instead,
Time to draw some scars
Even if we run to the end of the world,
We can never escape who we really are
He makes a wish and lets go,
May the winds reach their place
He looks in the mirror and stares hard,
But he can't recognize his own face


"today I feel like dying,
Its 3 am and everyone's asleep
I guess i'll go for a walk
Been weeks now but I just can't sleep"

"it was quiet dark and lonely,
But the silence held some kind of magic
My hands ache to write something,
But I won't, I know it'll be too tragic"


Take me as I am,
If I am nothing else, i'm pure
Even though I can't write
I still feel like a poet down to the core
I know you'll frown,
But I cant lie, I dont want to live anymore
But I know someday i'll die,
So i'm 'gonna put up with life somemore  
All I want is to be heard,
Guess that's not too much to ask
To move someone with my words,
A quiet feeling that would last
I don't want to be remembered
But I want someone to know who I was,
That I always found my way back, alone
No matter how lost I was
That even though I kissed the blade,
It never was a friend,
that I am sorry for all I did,
But sometimes I just wanted it all to end


"why are you sad , Avi ?
Don't you have everything ?"

- I guess something's wrong with my brain,
It just keeps coming back all over again


"why don't you opt for therapy"

-them drugs could never make me happy

"you don't have to be so ******* yourself"

- sometimes it's the only thing that helps


"Avi, remember we're all here for you"


-I don't care, i've fought all my battles without you


"if you go on like this you'll even lose the ones that are left"


-I guess it's true what doc said, no one can save me from myself



I wait in the hall,
She calls my name out
"he is ready for you"
Rings a little loud
I walk inside the door,
There he is , so old and grey
I wonder what he'll say
But there's just silence today
"Avi, i saw your reports
It shows improvement
i guess those sessions are working"
-what about my inner torment ?
"it's all in your mind"
- i know
" these pills will help you "
-i know
"take one in the morning
And one in the night,
One when you feel sick
And one when you feel alright"
- will it ever stop ?
"it's hard to say
- why me ,doc?
- Avi, you were born this way...




"avi, I'm sorry but i can't stay"

- i know , just go away


"i wish you could change"


-I'm comfortable in strange


"you don't have to be this way"


- but that's all who i am today..




Take me away and bring back my remains,
Standing on the other side won't make  the winds change
It'll all be as it was and I'll be lost,
Burning me won't fade my name
Hurt me with your lies,
And **** me with your truth
If i had a chance to be happy
Trust me, i would
But there's no hope,
I can't live in lies
This is all who i am ,
And i don't even know why
Maybe I'll learn to pretend,
Maybe I'll die
But no matter what happens,
I know there'll be no one by my side





" you're at it again , don't you?
You just make a fool of yourself,
Stop showing them your work
Or they'll start making fun of you themselves,
What's the matter, Avi ?
Did my words made you cry ?
Now write a poem about it,
That no one will ever read , oh my!"


I always struggled with words,
They were so hard to come by
And when they finally did,
I froze and couldn't write
But when I did write,
I never stopped to see what they meant ,
I could finally fight my demons,
And I could do it over and over again
I wish I was better,
And could fuse beauty in my lines
But I know i'm ugly
And this world never misses a chance to remind,
That I am not a poet
I am but a kid
That no one will ever take me seriously,
And I'll have to live with it


"avi, do you think they understand?"
-some of them

" do you feel alone?"
-no,i have my pen


"Avi, you have to stop writing so dark"
-why ?

"it's not what they want"
- a lie


"so you think they like it?"
-i don't care

"are you any good?"
-no, but I'm getting there



I speak to you with all my heart,
Oh, let me be, just let me be
If I ever write my heart out for you,
Close your eyes, don't you see
if I ever try to make you understand,
Remember, I am not what I claim
Even if I think I belong somehow,
I know, you and me are not the same  





I am but a kid, one sad sad kid...



Bleed away and sleep away,
All your nightmares, dream away
Oh child, step down
From your bed of thorns, walk away...

"mommy, where is daddy?"
- he's gone far away and will never return
"where did he go mommy"
- to the other side of the sun

* little Jessica
(oh that's really far)
*mommy
(bless her little heart)

" mommy, but tim told me he died"
- now, now you're too small to know
" but i'm too big for your lies"
-I guess you ought to know
" how did he die, mommy?"
- well, you know how he was
" he was really nice to me"
- well, thats not how he was
"how was he mommy"
- he was a bad person
" no, he was nice mommy"
-remember how he used his gun
" he let me try it too"
- oh, when Jessica ?!
"he told me not to tell you"
- but you must, Jessica!
"alright, but I want a candy"
-ok, Jessica
" and an ice-cream too"
- anything you want, Jessica!
" I want a pretty dress"
- you're crossing your limit
" other one is so old"
- but you still fit in it


*little Jessica
( i'm hungry )
*mother
(I hope theres nothing to worry)

"mommy i'm hungry"
- first tell me, what did daddy made you do
" he told me to aim and shoot"
- and did you ?!
"yeah, but I missed"
- aim at what ?!
"he told me not to tell you"
- why not ?!
" well he said it'll be our secret"
- you can tell mommy, dear
" what if he gets angry"
- DADDY IS DEAD, HE WON'T HEAR
" jeez, calm down"
- tell me what did you do
" first get me a gun"
" i'll show you"
- no, you can't have it
" than I won't tell you "
- alright, danm it !

*little Jessica
( i'm really hungry, danm!)
*mother
( he was such an evil man )

" give it to me "
- Please, be careful !
" just watch me "
- thats the trigger, don't pull
"jeez, mommy relax "
- it's all so wrong
" do you want it back?"
- I have to be strong
" so, he told me to hold it"
" and to be steady "
- don't aim at me
" woah, thats what he said to me"
" why are you so sweaty"
- Jessica , put it down
" why mommy, daddy's not around"
- give it to me now
" i don't like the way you sound"
- don't force me
" you can't, it has a live round "
- Jessica, get away from me
" than he begged for his life "
- don't come near me
" he told me to walk by his side "
- Please, don't do this
" and than I laughed because I thought he was funny "
- its not funny, get rid of it
" don't worry, i'm better now it'll be quick mommy"


*little Jessica
( i'm really really hungry)

She asked me if i was a man,
She couldn't see the monster in the mirror
I was afraid that she'll **** me
So i let her whisper
Her every breath left a mark on my skin,
And i could feel the monster waking within,
Her beautiful eyes on me
Made me sing
A song that made her smile,
In the dark as i softly weep
I caress her,
And watch her fall asleep
I stare at her,
As she bleeds
Where was fate gone,
When we decided to meet



But hey wait,
what if she never wakes,
I'll forever be lost in this night full of scars
Hey wait,
what if i never wake,
Will all the love she had for me ever last
Hey wait,
I've to run away
Before she can see through my mask


When I'm around her i feel so weak,
Just one touch and I'll fall apart
Why can't i make a ****,
It was never this hard
With every hit she withers away,
I can't see in moonlight
She reaches for me,
folds of sheets so white
And i know I'll be lost
For the rest of the night
It feels like heaven
And i have died
She lies on a bed of thorns,
Made it paradise
And i know she can see me,
With her closed eyes


But hey wait,
what if she never wakes,
I'll forever be lost in this night full of scars
Hey wait,
what if i never wake,
Will all the love she had for me ever last
Hey wait,
I've to run away
Before she can see through my mask


She rests in my arms,
I could easily snap her neck
But i know I'll never reach
So i stand back
And i know she's dreaming about me,
But all i am is a nightmare
I know we can never make it now,
there she is, everywhere
Everywhere i see ,
There's this scent she brought with her
She asked me if i was a man,
She couldn't see the monster in the mirror


But hey wait,
what if she never wakes,
I'll forever be lost in this night full of scars
Hey wait,
what if i never wake,
Will all the love she had for me ever last
Hey wait,
I've to run away
Before she can see through my mask
Hey wait,
i don't know what to say
Everything is stained in the shape of her heart

Once upon a time,
There was a man with no soul
He wandered into darkness
And locked the door
The key was lost to reasons,
enslaved in his heart
Caressing the morbid season
He walked too far
With no sign of life,
Calmness engulfed his eyes
Everything he ever touched
Always withered and died
Everyone he once knew,
Now were gone
Didn't knew who he was
Nor where he was from
Memories filled his despair
Of a time unknown
Where he belonged
Walls of a broken home
Death loomed the surface,
Of the night he dwelled
Dig out his pain,
In the pit where he fell
Comfort of sorrow
Now engulfed his heart
It felt like rain,
Knew not what these tears are
Embraced his fate
Chewed out his scars
Where he lies,
In the wake of stars
Stuck in his vision,
Of a dream he once had
Whenever he wakes
Everything goes black
And he's left in confusion,
Of what these years mean
Time never was a friend
Wouldn't let him dream,
Now he's empty
Every moment is cold
Moon is his silver
And sun is his cursed gold
Who he is,
Not even the mirror knows
Broken and cracked
His reflection outsold
Bleeding his nightmares
In the sea of his disguise
He swims in darkness
In the caress of the night




Once upon a time,
There was a man
Made deal with the devil,
Evil- he didn't understand
Sang on the crossroad
The song of hate,
With words of sorrow
Devil did wake
Thirst for blood
Made him blind
In the rules of hell,
His soul was bind
The deed was done
And morrow was gone
Upon the crossroad
He stood alone
With evil in his heart,
He made his way
Devil was gone,
But a ghost did stay
Claws of madness
Now griped his heart
He sold the world
And watched it fall apart






Once upon a time,
There was child in pain
He was different
And for some insane
He was quite
And he was deranged
They said he was the devil
With evil in his name
He was lonely
And he was lost
Reached out to the world
But they left him to rot
He knew about love,
It tasted bitter then hate
He watched them sleep,
To never wake
He made his way
To the land god forsaked
The world sold him,
To be the devils bait
And the devil grinned
He said,
"Be careful what you wish for
Or what you create"


Once upon a time,
A weight was borne
In depth of hell
A soul was born
He knew not of love,
Or the god they claimed
He knew not of hate,
Or the devil they blamed
For they were gods themselves
Ruling from their thrones
Fist of iron
And a heart of stone
In the onset of a nightmare
He was grown,
Smoke covered the sky
And the sun never shone
He was sold in hate,
All he had ever known
The man who sold the world
Was a god- one of their own

I'm that fragment of society
That was cut before it could be reaped
Now I lie here in ecstasy
Waiting to preach





hate




My black heart blending in night sky
I will fall like rain
There'll be no clouds
Just pain


From me to you
You to me




We bite each other
I love the taste of your blood





Smear me all over
Cover me in mud








Bury me in the ground
Where I won't be found








And I'll make this land barren
With hatred profound








Kiss my feet
Are you worthy enough ?









I am that seed
That will make this land burn









And you'll perish for your mistakes
What you've done you'll never know









Ask the mighty one
What have you done





Why you deserve my hate
My vengeance and fury














Vision is cold , no ?
Sight is blurry











With you not knowing
What you made me become









The cold one









You're the society aren't you ?

I'm done being human,
I don't like the places it leads
All those hidden emotions
That I just can't seem to reach
The saints hung on the cross
And all he ever does is preach
The air is full of holy words
In this smoke I can't even breathe



Take my hand now,
And lead me to my grave
I don't need your love
For i've seen you hate



Why am I talking to you,
You've never seen my nightmare
All my sins I hurl upon you
And silence is all you can hear
In the crowd I feel more alone,
Even though you're everywhere
tomorrow i'll be gone,
But you'll always be right here



Every breath that escapes me,
Is a smile in your eyes
You want to show me the truth
When all you have are lies




What of these sweet dreams,
And the lullabies that haunt
Why are you still here
What is that you want
I've given you everything
Yet, You still seek more
Why did I ever embrace you,
What was it all worth for



Will you hunt me down,
Now that I don't belong
And take away my crown
If I don't come along



Every blade that kiss my skin,
Will be in your name
As the scar travels within
It will remind you of pain
You watch me fall apart,
Don't even bother to pull out your knife
You squeeze my bleeding heart
And ask me, what i've done with my life



As I embrace the other side,
You whisper in my disgrace
You broke every mirror
Now you want to scar my face




I'm not what I was,
Something inside changed
I was born human
But i'll never be one of you again
If that's what it takes,
i'll scar myself with a smile
You're not awake,
Hav'nt seen the devil in a while




You will fear once again,
Of the ghost you so made
When i'm done with you
Every colour will fade




As I rip open your Soul,
Stare deep in your eyes
Remember you're the evil
I was made from your lies
As I make my way to your heart,
My claws will hurt no more
Can you not see in the dark,
Where you enslaved me for ever-more





I won't even hear you scream,
For i'll be lost in your demise
As the blade brings down the wrath
You'll see the human in my eyes








And i'll see the human in yours

bite into my soul and
taste your dirt,
inflict upon me your
rules of hurt.

make a wish in the
fountain of blood,
take a sip and you shall
conquer the world.



hang me for all the world to see,
even in my death i shall walk free.




show me the strength
of your crown,
let me be chased by your
blood hounds.

cut me and scar me, burn me
to the ground,
why walk straight when the
world's 'round.



lock me in a cage so i cannot leave,
even in these walls i shall walk free.



burn my skin to reach
my soul,
why break walls when you
see no door ?

come inside, take away all i know,
feed my hatred by hating me some more.



erase me so i could never be,
even in my extinction i shall walk free.



tie my hands and give
me a blade,
tell me who my enemies are
and war shall be made.

whisper to me the words
that degrade,
and i'll scream them at the world,
as i fade.



**** the lullabies so i can never dream,
even in my nightmares i shall walk free.






now take my hand and lead me to paradise,
fire of hell blowing through the kingdom of ice.


sit on your throne and try to swallow your pride,
for this slave will never be yours,
he's the master of his own life.




hang me for all the world to see,
even in my death i shall walk free.

I'm not 'gonna talk about suicide because it's a ****** thing to do
I know life is pretty hard as it is but again I won't put the blame on you

I know you're not stupid, maybe I am
I scream at you so much but you just don't understand
What is your reason, oh you sad sad man
I know you're not a coward but again I know you can't take a stand

They told me that I was wierd and in the mirror they could see a creep
I put it all on myself and with bleeding wrists I did weep
And than I took a noose and made sure it wasn't loose
Never bothered with a suicide note, I was struck with blues
And than I died with not a tear in my eyes,
I left every moment just lurking beneath the sky
And than I met God and he told me that I was stupid
And I told him he was the one who burned me with a cupid

And he told me that he had planned for so much more
And I told him why did he not tell me all this before

And he told me, oh child you couldn't see through your blues
So give me all your pain now and i'll put the crown of blame on you

"you're no fool but again you were never wise ,
Bad things happen to good people and that was the reason of your demise"

"and if you had waited till sunrise you could have seen the smoke clear
Couldn't you just watch breaking bad and all that **** and waited a few years my dear"

-but god, all I did was to just die, what's all the fuss about, that I didn't try ?
I tried but I failed and than I failed again without even trying,
My life was nothing but a joke and the world around me was dying

Enough screamed the god " I am god   and I crown you as a fool, I don't need a reason, I have all the universe to rule,
I don't have to argue with you punk, oh you emo kids think you're all so cool!"

"i'll make sure you're never re-born again , i'll put it up with my crew"


-what did I do to desreve this wrath of yours,  you never lent me a blanket when I was feeling cold,
'he will help you' 'he's always here for you', I was always told ,
But now I can see you are not what you were , man look at those wrinkles you've grown old

Shut up for godsake screamed the god

-you raised me in a broken home, dad was drunk, mamma a *****
I was ***** when I was four, do I need say more?
Where were you when I was popping those pills,
When daddy died and mamma didn't come home still,
I had to work my *** off when I was six to pay the bills
And I knew my chances of making out were nil

-in short it was going perfectly fine and I took that as a good sign,
And than you introduced me to a girl out of the blues
I knew than I was in love but I tried so hard(failed) to refuse
But you had to show you're 'godness' ,now didn't you?
Why did you land me a better job, who told you to?
Made me think I was a better man when I was with her,
And I could see a smile forming when I  looked in the mirror.


Are you done yet ?


-and than BOOM! , OUT OF NOWHERE you had to give her that stupid silver screen cancer,
Doctors have her two years to live but in only 2 months something killed her!


-now tell me god , what more did you had in store for me ?








God: "are you marilyn Lucas?, I have a feeling that I may be wrong"









- err, no I'm jack bundy, what the **** is going on?









"oh, i'm so sorry, it seems like my crew made a big mistake,
You can collect your token from the stands and proceed to the heavens gates"








"what ? , was it all a test ? "










"Hahah, this one is on the house"






Awkward silence





*to the crew,
"we 'gotta stop the suicides, it's becoming too confusing,
Who goes to heaven, who goes to hell ,  it's very time consuming"




I told you I wasn't 'gonna talk about suicide because it's a ****** thing to do