Even if you don't exist.
The idea of you,
has kept me going.

Even if it's lackadaisical
with a heavy helping of delusion.
It's better than nothing.

I wake up to nothing
       but chirping birds
            and the drip of coffee
                   pouring down,
            and wonder how I feel
       about it all—
             and find it refreshing
       to know I see it
            like a fairy fountain,
       standing tall—
calling me to slip on shoes
    and even walk on air
         if that’s what I choose.

It's been raining in my heart all day                                                              ­   storm  clouds gather, growing dark                                                  The  chances of the sun's bright rays                                                        are  looking completely stark                                                            ­       A  thick blanket of fog rolls in                                                               ­       followed by strikes of lightening                                                       ­      A  wave of emotional turbulence                                                       ­  the  storm in my heart's closing the distance

I miss you everyday
These constant reminders dig into my brain
Like thousands of miners
Deep underground

I miss you all the time
Wishing you were here with me still
Longing to hug you
One last time

I miss you more then ever
Even after almost a year
The pain radiates in every beat
Of my still alive heart

Once
Fault
Is
A
Fault
Minimize
To
Act
According
To
Gender
                  - Amisha priya

my heart is a landing pad
breathe in
catch
breathe out
let go
breathe in
catch
breathe out
let go
breathe in
breathe in
breathe in
i cant catch
breathe oubreatheinbreatheinbreathein

Strung prose
Like puzzle pieces
Broken across the page
No longer
Im too linear now
For all that
Maybe
Before long
I'll write
Instruction manuals
And think
They're poetic

How can the world say
That your heart isnt for me?
I feel your love every morning
I'm resting my head on this faith
And I bet my life on your grace

Si tú eres la yegua de ámbar
                    yo soy el camino de sangre
Si tú eres la primer nevada
                    yo soy el que enciende el brasero del alba
Si tú eres la torre de la noche
                    yo soy el clavo ardiendo en tu frente
Si tú eres la marea matutina
                    yo soy el grito del primer pájaro
Si tú eres la cesta de naranjas
                    yo soy el cuchillo de sol
Si tú eres el altar de piedra
                    yo soy la mano sacrílega
Si tú eres la tierra acostada
                    yo soy la caña verde
Si tú eres el salto del viento
                    yo soy el fuego enterrado
Si tú eres la boca del agua
                    yo soy la boca del musgo
Si tú eres el bosque de las nubes
                    yo soy el hacha que las parte
Si tú eres la ciudad profanada
                    yo soy la lluvia de consagración
Si tú eres la montana amarilla
                    yo soy los brazos rojos del liquen
Si tú eres el sol que se levanta
                    yo soy el camino de sangre

Amado es la palabra que en querer se concreta;
Nervo es la vibración de los nervios del mal.
¡Bendita sea y pura la canción del poeta
que lanzó sin pensar su frase de cristal!...Fraile de los suspiros, celeste anacoreta,
que tienes en blancura l'azúcar y la sal,
muéstrame el lirio puro que sigues en la veta,
y hazme escuchar el eco de tu alma sideral.Generoso y sutil como una mariposa,
encuentra en mí la miel de lo que soy capaz,
y goza en mí la dulce fragancia de la rosa.No busques en mis gestos el alma de mi faz;
quiere lo que se aquieta, busca lo que reposa
y ten, como una joya, la perla de la Paz.

Imagine learning developing your self over the years.

The noise reduction level like Steve jobs sitting in a chair.

Missing out on life in ways on beyond in so much many ways.

Everyone is like a stereotype and they act like a predicted LLM model like x rays.

While your learning new ways to shape inventions using your time over the years.

Imagine everything you did they have copycats that wants to be like you in days.

Imagine they never went through the depth of the experience you've endured over the years.

Such hard life  been working at eight years old, my old friend was the machine, to fix repair to draw and to develop over the years.

My legacy was copy and stolen over the years.

Imagine they've learned you to a degree to set your life on fire over the years.

Putting chemicals in your food and drink over the years.

Shaping your mind into someone else over the years.

Been lonely to find someone over the years, no real social skills in so much ways.

The storms with parents over the years, the pain I've experienced over the years with my foster parents over the years.

No compensation from the hardship of their choices.

No one took the time to focus on me with care over the years.

Struggling through it all in so many ways.
Imagine having a Alienware computer that can work in so many ways.

Friends envious to take your system in so many ways.

Stealing your laptop robbery and setting your place on fire in so many ways.

Being homeless in so many ways.

Working to see your father in so many ways, shared ideas developed business in so many ways.

Its like working for buttons in so many ways, couldn't afford to focus on exams and other things in so many ways.

All you wanted to do was to fit in with people in so many ways.

All of them used me in so many ways.

Building their empire in so many ways.

Gotten addicted to things in so many ways.

Manipulated used in so many ways.
Been accustomed to abuse in so many ways.

Never really found real true people that really cared.

A nerd like little bamboo plant growing in so many ways.

Discovering the real hard pain in so many ways.

Been influenced under the chemicals in so many ways.

Been hurt as the victim in so many ways.

Podcasts that are fictional with the past of fifteen yesterday.

They used everything to burn me in multiple ways.

They bought a plastic to hurt me in so many ways.

The social activist that targeted the men on the dating app so many ways.

Social activist targeting a Jewish student with her ways.

Here psychological situation of the her father leaving her in so many ways.

Taking it out on men and targeting men in so many ways.

The blender she wanted on him in so many ways.

Poor hard working men looking for closure of the earths hardship to be burned and hurt and bullied in so many ways.

Don't go online dating especially if your a nerd for anyone today.

Do things the old school way, parents who made us today, who knew to socialize the real social way, avoid these apps because they have their data on you, privacy is important because you can be down in the blue.

The lesson here is to socialize without publicity to be private with close doors than to face the judiciary, the internet with filters you will be taken advantage without even a sign of paper the lost and major disadvantage.

Real social dating groups with policies should be designed and made, like the movie hitch with Will smith that is run today.

Learn from me you'll see I'm not wrong, someone online can take your life and you'll be wrong!!

You can use X to journalize to write and to think.

Years ago we had so many pen pals that we wrote and exchanged pictures that is digital today, pen pals where more intimate and made marriage yesterday.

Digital dating is dangerous today, we need old school socializing today.

She's not Christian but looking for a way out with her manipulative ways.

She betrayed her religion in so many ways.

She's not smart doesn't like to work with her seductive ways.

Recently saw a woman who was with a Buddhist black mailing them robbing them with her manipulative ways.

We're men that designed this entire life in so many ways.

WE all men deserve the credit the love in so many ways.

Yet still we're effected in so many ways.

Our Y gene is dying faster in so many ways.

Population of men reducing shorter and shorter in so many ways.

Stress kills men  faster today, that's why we drink and party a lot these days.

The world needs ambition skills and innovation in so many ways.

We already have models that expires flipped and turn and clicked from day days.

We need new discovery science ideas physics, inventions in so many ways.

Yet still this pushes a different trade and influences young women not to work or to trade doing manipulative things in so many ways.

What really are we doing if the earth has days?

The astroid flying towards us in days?

Elon musk mars project should excel today with new physics today!

We as men needs the fighting power in so many ways, we need the credit the time the talk in so many ways.

We need better care in so many ways.

How can you be married and there isn't a certificate this is limited on so many ways?

No we don't want you please stay where you are and stop living off of people's resources, many say go away!!

Inventions ideas and development and innovation requires men in so many ways.

The richest people on earth and geeks rules the earth in so many ways.

We need ideas and money in so many ways.

We need social scores and karmic scores  like reddit in so many ways.

You can be talking to a stranger that can end your life in so many ways, with no degree no ambition or focus or working, addicted to the manipulative and seductive ways.

Be careful do not look for love today everyone wants money in many ways.

Study focus do the right thing you'll be rewarded in so many ways.

We're all fighting a hard battle the goal is survival in so many ways.

Why are you helping the social activist with no carrier?

She's  like the twin towers falling, picture that yesterday.

No invention, no design, no ambition or focus of the future?

You need people with with focus of their path and carrier, science and a.i today.

Ideas ways of inventions and developments today?

We need a virtual world with simulation  speeds to correct the faults we have today?

We have a global crisis every where?

Many peoples need jobs and ideas today.
We need assets and things toda.

We're humans not robots in this day and age in so many ways.

We need new tools to fix things and solve things beyond the conventional ways.

Nerds rules the world today in miraculous ways, the Utopia technological empire today.

We need to focus on the planet arrears.

Trading working in so many ways.

Doing the right things today.

Nerds needs the love so we can focus and solving the crisis today.

Dating a gangster have short days.

Nerds lives longer with many investment stocks brighter than yesterday.

The nerd is a asset and the gangster  is the liability that was yesterday.

Date a nerd he will be your husband today.

Let him focus on his work because he is need in the world today.

Inspire him with love and tender care today.

You'll see the progress with him in miraculous ways.

A Gangster will hurt you in so many ways.

The Gangster got everything about you in so many ways, showing your true color and manipulative and seductive ways,

She has hurt so many men today.

Five times the gangster and plastic  where together online and slept at the stadium, remember that was yesterday, everyone saw the rules was broken and spoke about in funny news cast the other day.

What are we doing today?

The clock is ticking in so many ways .
The world needs more people like Elon musk in so many ways.

Technology is the gem today.

Nerds today stay away from love in many ways.
Become a CEO today.

Work on your idea and share this story today.

The twenty five has won  in so many ways, quantum computing opening new ways.

Artifical intelligence investment, University for new road maps and skills today Trillions of rapid investments looking for new workers today.

Rapid growth and acceleration today.
Nerds are needed more ever today.

Global hunger is rising and we need to share our ideas today.
Invention tools of the road map with our skills today.

As men we're all kings today, like the emperor, Trump that is today.

As a nerd you'll survive a long time in so many ways.

As Nerds be very careful today and let's get started today.

Stay out of trouble learn  science and maths and discover new ways.

Don't be like Jeff , Kanye West today,  ensure you sign a prenup today.

I found my passion love creative skill with the technology people all across the globe today, shaping a new tomorrow with the future better than yesterday .

More work and development today, we need a bigger brighter industry of technology hub for all nerds around the globe today.

The round about circle as the karmic wheel that spins everyday.

Focus on your business and work today.

Stay out of trouble and do the right thing today.

Be a student everyday.

You'll be surprised where life can go than yesterday.

Be a programmer today, show the development and examples of the work today.

Start using a.i and learning new tools today.

My message can be a start today.

Focus on ideas, look at shark tank ideas today.

Men will always be at the top of the fortune list, do your research and home work.

We as men we pay bills!! Hard workers to date.

A Nerd is better than a gangster a nerd is an inventor, look at einstein and all the men that have created and made the world today.

Nerds are irreplaceable and rules the entire giant industry today.

Learn maths develop your self become smarter today.

If you know that you're smart and you know you have skill and talents, undervalued used for exams

Move away push as hard as you can get focus on your work carrier and think, innovate the leading new development and cure your self better and to think.

We all have to work and we must be considered as strong hard working  working bight ideas inventions.

It's unfair working so many hours and then learning of a affair, everything destroyed because you had fun and cheer.

Nerds with skills and talants needs to be treated fairly, we turn this entire world everyday from cryptocurrency innovation to data centers to construction to people who sits at the stadium that sits in chairs.

Without us the world cannot run, imagine having more of us with a gold medal and have won!

We need the right people to breed and station together, we need real people that understands us far better.

We need people with innovative ideas to pay major bills, we need people who can assist the world economy in so many ways.

We need solutions to solve major problems than major corrupt practice spread like cancer hurting each other over misinformation and misjudgment and string attached pulled in many ways.

The future the industry will be ran by men, the robots helping us along the path and guiding way.

We're working men not sitting down looking at a screen with pictures, we're focusing on the new development with new door openings with answers.

The tech industry is highly powerful competing against that is very difficult, respect the nerds that walks the lands likely you'll be working for him some day shanking his hands.

You cannot change your religion to hide what has already shown.

In life some people deserve the credit of the work that is due.

You don't know what you can become today, search for the answer.

We're the future that is shaping the planet today, we're the ones for a brighter future than yesterday.

Science will develop with our power and shape the future movie like krypton, don't underestimate us, we're came at the beginning of time working as one.

Maybe together as one.

Don't say I didn't warn you with my written answers you'll read this post back knowing the answer.



Focus on Hard work and the universal blessing  in so many ways.

One land, one sky, one sea, one people,
the boundaries that divide us are not on maps,
but in our minds and hearts. There will be
no nations, no money, no jails and prisons.
To heal those who are hurting, there will be
LOVE CENTERS where they will be loved,
not punished. All 8,000,000,000 Citizens of Earth
will have a responsibility and a right:  
to treat others with kindness and respect  
and to be treated with kindness and respect.
All Citizens of Earth are encouraged to do
what they love. Each will have to spend 10 years
between the ages of 18 and 60 to help humanity
and our home, Earth. Every Citizen of Earth
will be free to travel anywhere on Earth.
There will be no weapons on Earth. Our mantra
will be UNGUN EARTH. All needs--food,
clean water, health care, housing, education--
will be given equally to all Citizens of Earth.
A World Picnic will be held on a different
continent every year. The World Picnic will
last the whole year. All Citizens of Earth
will be provided transportation to spend
a week at the World Picnic to enjoy different
foods, different customs, different languages
from around the world. All can experience
differences with joy, not dread.   
Love, not hate. Peace, not war.
Planet Peace.

TOD HOWARD HAWKS

"Listen to elders"
I always hear here and there
"Even fools grow old"

Tar-dark world. The defining color is black, the inky night of her nocturnal hunts and the deep, bottomless dark of her alien retreat.

A watcher of men, she is everything and nothing. She might be too much of something, or too little of something else. Time will sort out the particulars.

There are no simple entry points – she demands engagement, and to be taken as a whole. Her discomfort is over her own allure, her undisturbed surface. It’s more about intuition and gesture than dialogue. They remain as echoes. They’ve made her beautiful in a real way, with hips and blemishes and dimples in her skin.

The imprint of the lives she begins to grapple with as her time on Earth extends, leads her to stop seeing herself as a mere conduit for her mission, and to start developing a sense of subjectivity.

Her life force is overlapping, shaping itself into a pattern of rings that simultaneously suggests a birth canal dilating, the stages of a rocket separating, and a lunar eclipse as seen through a telescope’s lens.

She's a life-form you can’t quite understand, but it’s carrying on relentlessly, like a beehive, moving backward through the constellations at first approach.

Rocky was Robert
Clubber was James
But Apollo
Was Apollo
And Apollo
He remains.

All we need is darkness
for the natural selection of light
I watch the past as a travel show
the necessity or adversity ignites language,
different shapes of games, we like the power plays
of circle
let me be sealed in a wave
I want to descend to the faith of sand
to the Cro-Magno vision of words

Last night I opened the door to a fear I do not know,
a stranger from the street.
Its overwhelming silhouette now casting over my feet.

It greeted me like a neighbour,
tightly gripping at my hand,
a warmth not becoming of the spectre I did not understand.

For my life I've carried this scar.
A symbol of my mother's mercy,
A blessing of a life for which others have been thirsty.

I quietly parade it in defiance,
that slender crescent moon,
rising from my skin so as not to be forgotten.

Now I stand at the doorway of my conscience
and warily make acquaintance,
with the helpless fear that long feasted on my mother's patience.

I didn’t want to fall apart mid-sentence,
So I said less and asked more questions.
Tuned out love songs, skipped our street —
I made avoiding you look complete.

I smile and nod when your name is mentioned,
As if it doesn't pull me out of the conversation
They throw it around casually, like it's not cutting right through —
I guess I never got to cry out about you.

For a moment I took pleasure
On the fact that you existed
You were there
Silent
Withdrawn
But wise
Oh so wise

I felt I could talk to you
As if I talked to the moon
And God you could understand.

I found a scribbled piece of paper on my coat,
The wife wrote, "pick up some CANDLES" in a note.
I thought it said "CANDIES" hoping to discover,
that we finally would have candies,
In our cupboard.
So I bought in a rush:
Snickers, Abba Zabba, Milky Way, Three Musketeers, Reeses peanut butter cups, M&Ms, Almond Joy, Milk Duds, laughy Taffy....and such.
I called her and told her all the candies I bought,
She said, "CANDLES, stupid", so I hung up.

I knew something as kid
that now I have forgotten
Time tricks you into thinking
you are going forward
I was chasing being brilliant,
So they told me stupidity
was the prize of intelligence - I get that now
But I’m yet craving sagacity,
Then will I truly get it when I get the chance?
Because perhaps what I lost
is an ignorance that I’ll never recover
And I’ll never be as smart as when i was dumber

It doesn’t grow; it lingers.
Clings to ice older than regret, green with memory no world was there to gather.

The silence hums like a forgotten vow, not broken, just orbiting its chance to be said.

Moss dreams in spores and spores of maybe.
Each tendril reaching for a gravity that will not claim it.

This is not nature.
It’s ritual.
A fuzzed hymn to the act of staying where leaving has already begun.

So the comet loops, wearing time’s soft refusal.
And we, the flinch, the breath halfway drawn, call that orbit "now."

So out of touch,
Lost, out overlooking sea.
Adrift, alone —
Cast out, wayside of the rift.
Scream, beg, but no sound.

Tired, futile to ease,
One foot forward, drag the back.
Adrift, alone —
Struck down, caught by the plague.
Scream, beg, but vacuum surrounds.

So uneasily unstable,
A crumbling world, can't fix the cracks.
Adrift, alone —
Fallen once, an angel, now trapped.
Scream, beg, but alas,

No sound.

saw a chicken up
a tree and
no one
believes me

¡Ya coronó la dicha tus amores!
Un hijo tienes ya, que habrá nacido
Oyendo, cual los dulces ruiseñores,
Músicas en los aires y en el nido.

Sé que la madre de ventura loca
Cifra en él sus más dulces embelesos,
Y que en la fresca guinda de su boca
Acendra miel con lágrimas y besos.

Sé que a ti ya te enferman los sonrojos,
Pues cada extraño que en tu bien repara
Te dice que sus ojos son tus ojos.
Que en su cara de cielo está tu cara.

Y hablando la verdad, si se parece
A su progenitor, yo lo bendigo;
Ya verás cómo vive y cómo crece,
Y halla en cada mortal un buen amigo.

¡Todo igual a su padre! el mundo dice,
Y tú lo miras, y con tierno arrullo
Tu mano lo acaricia y lo bendice
Con infinito amor y noble orgullo.

Hoy tiemblas si en la cuna se menea,
Y tiemblas cuando duerme sosegado,
Y al ver que gesticula y pestañea
Dices en tu interior: ¿qué habrá pensado?

Ni la brisa sutil dejas que roce
Su frente angelical; te ve y suspira,
Y dices con pasión: ¡ya me conoce,
Y ya me quiere hablar cuando me mira!

Habrá que verte cuando ufano pasas
Llevando al nuevo rey de tus amores,
En un coche de mimbres y de gasas
En triunfo por los anchos corredores.

Seguro estoy de que gozoso gritas
Cuando ves con qué gracia tu heredero
Alza al aire las blancas manecitas
Y agita el argentado sonajero.

Y que, por más que está recién llegado
A tu hogar, venturoso cual ninguno,
Lo sueñas almirante y abogado,
Capitán general, sabio y tribuno.

Y lo miras del mundo en la faena
Desdeñando lisonjas y oropeles,
Y su mirada cándida y serena
Te habla de gloria, aplausos y laureles.

Siendo tan pequeñito lo ves hombre,
Y hasta pretendes inquirir ufano
Cómo pondrá las letras de su nombre
El jazmín diminuto de su mano.

Comprendo bien que el serafín te engríe,
Que con él van tus horas muy de prisa,
Y que miras a Dios si te sonríe,
Pues está todo el cielo en su sonrisa.

Miro a la joven madre en su recato
Cómo lo baña en su mirar sereno,
Y hallando en él tu amor y tu retrato,
¡Le da toda la savia de su seno!

Comprendo tu alborozo: en tu alma anida
El más augusto y santo regocijo;
¡Ser padre es ser devoto de la vida,
Porque toda la vida está en el hijo!

Hoy pensarás en todo; si te exalta
El más ciego furor, pronto al mirarlo
Exclamarás con miedo: ¡le hago falta!
¡Yo no debo por nadie abandonarlo!

Es nueva religión la que en él tienes;
Al verlo tu esperanza fortificas,
Y la mejor corona de tus sienes
Es el inmenso amor que le dedicas.

¿Nació para cantar? ¡destino santo!
No lo veré; mi vida se derrumba
A un abismo sin fin; pídele un canto
A mi cariño a ti, sobre mi tumba;

Dile que se estrecharon nuestras manos
Cuando viniste a honrar el suelo mío,
Que tú y yo nos quisimos como hermanos,
Que le amo mucho, y que me llame tío.

Que ha visto el claro albor de la existencia
En esa fecha llena de esplendores
En que mi patria ungió su independencia
Con el grito del cura de Dolores.

¡Dios te vele esa joya de valía,
Tenga en el mundo mirtos por alfombra,
Y que mañana puedan tú y María
Entrelazar sus canas a su sombra!

Éclair My Heart

Fill me up with custard’s glow,  
soft as secrets whispered low.  
Chocolate coat our midnight vows,  
each bite a bow that time allows.  

Glossy tease of vanilla sighs—  
declare your love in pastry cries.





.

1 Ring
5 Rings
10 Rings
20 Rings…

I was just sleeping—
walking down the stairs
with heavy feet.

The window cracks
shining light to my face—
tempting me back to bed.
Opposite of a charming kiss
given unto a princess in slumber.

…

But I cant go to sleep
as she doubled the rings on the door.

So I opened the door
and like a dead corpse,
I faded by the light.

“Ahhh.”

At that moment
I remembered what I dreamt of…

“Lying and Semaniusly”
Blurted out
as I realized
I was already blocked?

“That makes no sense!”
I thought to myself.

Why would they do that?
What was the reason for it?
Was it necessary?

All of these questions
and my mind was tied
to the self-deprecating rings
that stopped me
from searching in this dream.

———————————-

To acknowledge
that I left the dream confused
was frustrating.

But cleanly
I came out of the dream—
and had to check
if it really was a dream…

Contumely so—
I left with a new word.

“Semaniusly”?