"waining" poems
I approached my *****
The tender charisma of something unholy haunted
Carved with my fingertips
the sacred verses
While my temple anointed fresh basins
Preparations waining
an exorcism
Chanted through pulsing
Pressure to release haunts
Hours of screams
Days of lusting
For the body that no longer begs
Wants
Where I birthed an age
Without your dark haze embedded in the sides of my rib cage
Allowed new lovers to taste
The fresh fruit
I no longer hollowed out
Begs of you
Oct 10, 2018
Oct 10, 2018 at 10:36 PM UTC
You see me
You free me
And every time
you take me back-
"A hint of light in the dark (I always know)
Only enough to keep from giving up
(you're never too far, cause)
If I could go back to the start;
(wherever you go)
Id break the pattern-
(We're under the same stars.)
-before too late."
You change bodies
Sporting each soul,
Their trivialities vs.
True athenticity
How it tesselates each role;
As if I wouldn't notice it
Always, so open ended;
Every word written -
Every artwork made;
Each specific song -
Either listened to or played
Were never for anyone but myself.
Aug 11, 2023
Aug 11, 2023 at 7:42 AM UTC
*The Dull Dawning Sky Woke The Birds,
As It Metamorphosed In Grace,
The New Day Deserved No New Words,
For She Would've Taken Them With Her,
As Well As Every Waining Breath,
She Brought With Her Spirits For Life,
She **** With Her Spirits Of Death,
To Bring Them Back To The Heavens*
Mar 22, 2013
Mar 22, 2013 at 8:44 AM UTC
We bandage our tender hearts with cast iron strips,
constricting the blood flow to our faces,
pale skin with a waining zest for life.
There is an extra shelf in our closets for home-made masks,
the masks are poorly made
and our true pale skin can be easily seen
through the cracks in our bright coloured ornaments.
It's a **** shame about our cut up hearts.
If they could heal instead of hide,
then dreamers would be the true world changers,
and love would be a possibility for us all.
But our cynacism imprisons our weak minds
in dungeons of hopelessness and pretentiousness.
Our talk traps us through regurgitated drivel,
we talk **** with loud uttering
as if our **** holds in it the secrets of the universe.
Yet in the mean time-
the very words we think will protect us from this wild wild world
expose us as fools and make us soft tarkets-
propelling us further into loneliness.
At least we live in the delusion that we are now all grown up.
Dec 10, 2009
Dec 10, 2009 at 6:47 AM UTC
i never would write until the night fell
you laugh at me from the light
and every smear of honesty
betrays me
and you stand a thousand stories tall
but i have to leave my shoes
in the door way
the stars arent your eyes any more
they are only the fire
the flame that scorches my rib cage
its as though i payed a mask maker
if everything was in its right place
my reflection wouldnt seemed so skewed
remember
a lemon is a fruit
with every car parked aside the avenue
all lanes free
you can run
lumber
in the turn lane
beneath the big sign
that changes colors
that blinds you with its fascism
with its charges against you
that youre given ninety to life for
***** and beanie weenies
a cats purr
pecans
the writings of a mystic
purrs
and the mask maker
and a sneeze
then love
to stretch out
to cuddle up
to fail at cartwheels
we cant loose
i hear you cheese over the phone
every single hormone
cresting and waining
here i am
the mind of the eye
or vica verse
if you cant
then i will
Dec 5, 2013
Dec 5, 2013 at 8:40 PM UTC
Sight's before me sorrow's my vision
Old and the needy stay sitting
Waiting for fate
Waiting their future
In a place no one wants to be
Welcome to the badlands
A place where time has fell
Life has stopped
My bowed head can do no more
As children cry for peace
I seek solace in the extortion
A tepid flavored liquid does nothing
To lighten me
So now my only focus is the death bin
My only aim for this putrid vile
Breath as I do
Nothing is hiding
Every all is waiting
Only the sharp may satisfy
My woe
Time is waining
The urge to scream has bubbled
The badlands holds me
Bait's my anger
Teases my rage
Stick me
Heal me
Boost my glowing
Seed my life
Let me go
The voice is near
My name to call
Escape my fear
Cure us
Cure us all
May 24, 2014
May 24, 2014 at 12:23 AM UTC
Hi.
Hello.
Distanced greetings to replace what I would rather say to you.
You may be a "hi" on a Monday but on my day off, you are a "please come over".
On day off number two, you are a "see me, touch me, be with me",
not With me--with me, I could not handle that,
but be near me like we use to,
how we can manipulate the clock into making the day 25 hours long without noticing.
Time is more observed now.
I see an hour spent with you like I see a full moon,
waining, waining,
I am Waiting, waiting to effortlessly know you again.
Do not worry about your privacy, I don't want to take it.
I am not in love,
this is not about that,
if it were, I would know what to do.
No, this is something much more permanent than the fluctuating ecstasy of love.
This is loss.
You know that is hard for me.
I can't go on a date and laugh and drink and forget.
To be clear, I am not upset if you can.
Maybe all you are losing is me,
maybe that thought has settled in and been accepted,
look at all you can gain now,right?
I lose weight. I lose sleep. I lose support. I lose a second family. I lose holidays away from home.
I lose friends that were yours, that were mine, that were really yours.
I lose you and it is more than I am used to losing.
I stub my toe every time I say your name, think your name,
hoping it will force me to stop thinking your name,
this is not a fun game.
The pieces of us when we broke, no longer fit,
with that I agree,
but don't you think with all the pieces of you and all
the pieces of me,
one is hiding to be found when we are whole people.
It's a nice thought anyway that stops me from down playing what we were.
I often convince myself of a truth that could be possible.
You do not care for me,
you will not call me,
you will not remind me any of this was real
because you don't love me.
You write in that book what I want to hear in my ear,
Please don't study me and take notes.
The experiment chapter is over.
You got the results,
I got what is left.
Mar 18, 2013
Mar 18, 2013 at 9:59 PM UTC
Death where is thy sting
when I am already stung,
by lips that laugh and speak and sing
the words once held by muted tongue.
For lo no light from window broke
no Juliet nor waining moon,
just honest words of love were spoke
that gave my heart a brand new tune.
So slings and arrows do thy worst
and misfortune come as may,
for here at last am I uncursed
as in her arms I softly lay.
Let scholars say he was the bard
and all his works a work of art,
but I would rather be fool hard
and know I am her work of heart.
Apr 4, 2012
Apr 4, 2012 at 6:37 AM UTC
Hold my hand and walk with me
Let our lives begin from days that become thinner
Only ten thousand more
Till we greet
Join that door
Fade to ebb
As the past is
Written
Ever lost
Kiss me now for time on here is failing
Days and nights are waining
Soon all will be as one
Sunken into darkness
Remembered and forgotten
Dreams of memories
Etched in stone
Let us run my love
Let us laugh
The one chance is given
No second comings
No prayer for a change
It's ours to want
Ours to take
To live
Live as one
Till ten thousand
Becomes just the one
Jul 6, 2015
Jul 6, 2015 at 12:17 AM UTC
There are little things;
Herbal Tea Lattes,
The full sound of my Mother's piano,
Long, waining summer days,
The way his brow creases when I let go.
Things so fully beautiful;
The colour of the sunset on a smokey summer night,
The filtered warmth of a walk through the trees,
The words of my soul printed in black and white,
The look in his eyes when I'm all he sees.
That all it takes is a moment;
The warmth of his skin on mine,
The sound of a poem smooth on your tongue,
The truth of emotion you feel with each line,
The whisper of air words pull from his lungs.
There are little things,
Things so fully beautiful,
That all it takes is a moment,
To fall in love completely.
It only took a moment,
To love you this completely
Aug 9, 2014
Aug 9, 2014 at 12:52 AM UTC
maybe it was the light reflecting off the water that made it all feel surreal
the long drive the slow dive
the weight of unspoken want
we shed our clothes and bore our skin out into the night air
and we told you not to look knowing full well that you would anyway
but anyway
here's another night spent in proximity to another life
secreted away in city lights and manufactured stars
you lifted me over the fence just to carry me until morning light
pale
open
blunt.
vulnerable in the dark water
flash junk imagery of your hands on my waist
gold and black and crystalline in the low light from the parking lot
your visual stimulation an ever present hum in the background of the moment
we broke in just to break out of routine
six of us small thin and brittle in exposure
connected by the weight of unspoken want
just don't leave it for too long
and I told you not to knowing that you would
you looked and I fell and they laughed knowing it was the slow burn all along
and I know that on the ride home you'll wait for glimpses of my figure illuminated by break lights
and that I'll search for your arms in the darkened car
but for now it's the light reflecting off the water
and your iconic longing
the type that sets a lover into eternity in photographs and sighs
thin wrists and thighs
this is the long drive and the slow dive
and six feet under isn't so scary in a swimming pool
dark blue and numbing the weight fades away only to resurface along the arch of my spine
reignited by your hands cautious and thin
and the waves tumble in
reckless son sick coughing up blood like I need this
nervous soul set alight in the waining darkness
you'll catch me before they catch us
and I'll be the first to confess
that it was the weight all along
exposed and half dressed faded in the wave pool
the long drive the slow dive
the weight of want in your arms.
Nov 20, 2015
Nov 20, 2015 at 1:29 PM UTC
"everybody goes there sometimes"
sings in my ears. he smiles
waining crescent
and ****** drips
find the corner of his mouth.
indestructible and somehow
unafraid.
"well.. she gives beautiful hugs" he says
to my friend in the parking lot
as i sit on the roof of the car 6 feet
away drunkenly brooding
as per usual
and i thought about the time
i hit him, and
we sometimes hate each other.
when i come home
we don't have to talk about it.
Dec 7, 2014
Dec 7, 2014 at 3:41 PM UTC
when the moment is right and our hearts are on fire i know we'll see the light
theres a hand on my head and im under their thumb
but i wont love you out of spite
ten thousand loves but your the one from above
when im blind you'll be my sight
oh significant other
you make me wonder
oh significant other
is there another one?
I wanna I wanna I wanna I wanna
know what you've become
I wanna I wanna I wanna I wanna
be your only sun
so many to consider
i start to wither
waining with the moon
howling with the wolf when youre full again
everyday i think of some way we could begin again
Oct 22, 2013
Oct 22, 2013 at 11:09 PM UTC
Her skin smells of the petals of a winter rose,
That the years have turned to stone,
A brutal flower in rocky soil ,
That once was a heart ,
As fair as summer as winters never came,
But the waining of a life's moon,
Brought winter in feeling to soon,
The oceans of youth dried to deserts of age,
And her rosy cheeks now left lines on her face,
The echoes of beauty lost as evening falls,
As bright eyes left dimmed,
That beauty never to be seen again,
And laying down she sheds a tear,
To all the lost and forgotten years ,
When the taste was sweet,
Yet now left bitter and cold,
Oh how cruel it is growing old.
Feb 11, 2015
Feb 11, 2015 at 2:59 AM UTC
~
Ranting and raving
Scrimping and saving
The words you hold in reserve
The breadth and width
Of words unsaid
Says more than you ever could
Waxing and waining
Your ever disdaining
The lines are writ on your face
I read between
to see to be seen
The secrets you've kept in your heart
With the knowing and showing
You can better understand who you are
The silence between
What you are now
And what you have been
Is the silence that holds you from me.
~
Mar 9, 2015
Mar 9, 2015 at 3:05 PM UTC
Perhaps,
the moon does not realize
its Fullness
Until it begins waining
And only then
In its grasping for light
Does it
Suffer
maybe,
in its
Newness
Does it begin to think
It is enlightened.
It is finally nothing.
Only to start waxing
Again
And only,
the Witness is
knowing
It is always whole
Always empty
Always there
Aware.
Dec 4, 2017
Dec 4, 2017 at 8:37 PM UTC
He was a child of the dawn and the dusk
Wanting and waining with the tides he could trust
With soft gentle hands and an innocent touch
He's the child within and to nurture I must
A mother a sister a daughter in one
To succumb to addiction is to say that it's won
But to bury the deep and burdening shame
Her misguided attempt to sow the soul together again
Feb 24, 2018
Feb 24, 2018 at 11:39 PM UTC
The moon was soon to be my lover:
"The great pusher and puller"
On a sad day in November,
I gave up my surrender.
As long as I was safe here,
their companion blue sphere,
they knew I wasn't going to fade.
Always thought that I would stay.
Soft pink ribbons fill my head
Light beams falling on the bed
But I could only see them
through a shaded lense.
I don't know when that began.
As the months grew longer
they watched me wander
from somewhere much farther away.
And now we're lonely.
Their love was fuller and faster,
retreating and waining.
Sunlight reflecting,
then raining and raining
I love you, I'm sorry
I hate you, don't leave me
My absence grew fonder
than staying and grieving
Then I was gone
I don't like myself when I'm away
I wonder where did we go wrong
Always thought that I would stay
Feb 24, 2018
Feb 24, 2018 at 11:42 PM UTC
My writers mind is consumed in thoughts,
as the waining moon shines,
and wind blows at the 2Am hour.
Vessel is gripped with feelings of desertion
as if time stopped and I’m stuck in limbo.
What does a person do,
when loved ones are allusive
and care little about a sibling?
When sleeping seems unattainable?
And seeking out a friend is nonviable
since those dead asleep cannot hear.
And yet with pen in hand my only friends
seem to be the written word.
The phases that give serenity to a tired soul.
The wind howls trying to get inside mind,
as if knocking at my door-like ears.
As if it wants to come in, while hour turns to three
and street lamps still burn.
Yes the writers mind creates
when ****** into a cavern of words and darken halls.
It lingers under desk lamp that causes a haze in eyes
and a lightheaded frame.
Searching for reasons for a restless night
and solemn heartbeat continues,
as hand to pen is held tightly
and words flow like opened levee.
Phases swirl in mind before hitting page.
They mount with words of hurt from people doing me wrong.
They echo with power cutting open old wounds.
The blood of memories cover as if a blanket.
Now I understand why my sleep is unattainable.
Now its time to surrender and take a pill to sleep.
Just maybe later today the sun will bring some peace
and perhaps a friend to lend an ear.
StarBG © 2017
Sep 2, 2017
Sep 2, 2017 at 10:10 AM UTC
As if the crests of the waves were slumping shoulders
I watch them roll away
Fingers sifting through the tide
A futile attempt to hold on
The moon lays a pathway
On the surface of the sea
Just another empty road
Why ?
Hopeless tenants we are
At the mercy of our surroundings
My love , my ocean , my world
I'm drowning
We floated on our hearts
Tied together by our kindred spirits
Undone by indecision and Under appreciation
My tears make no difference
On the surface of the sea
Or her hardened heart
Mine has lost its buoyancy
Without hers to hold me
I taste the salt on my lips
Just like my tears
Suffocating without her
My love
The pathway fades in the waining of the moon
The current grabs me
Just as her heart did
Hopeless travelers , at the mercy of our affections
Without her ,
I'm lost at sea ........
I love you
Oct 8, 2014
Oct 8, 2014 at 1:20 PM UTC
I wonder if......
I wonder if you still imagine our kiss ... the way our lips fit together as if they were made from the same mold destined to be one ever after.
I wonder if you think of me , us , or we ? The forever we were supper to have .
I wonder if you miss being enveloped I’m my embrace where you could hear my heartbeat calling your name as you rest your head upon it , if you could feel the affection emitting from my entire being .
Do you miss not having to wonder we’re my heart was ?
Morning ,noon,and night ,everything you .... always .
Do you miss my voice , filled with tenderness , soothing , and always wanting to comfort ?
I wonder if you miss my touch , my fingers through your hair , or how they brushed along your skin with the gentleness of a sculptor caressing his creation , and even those spots that would send a jolt through your insides , I wonder .
I wonder what your doing now ?
Do things remind you if us ?
I see you in everything beautiful , and in beauty , you made me see ....
You were the breath of my soul.
I wonder if you feel an emptiness In yours , do you hear my voice in your mind and wonder and I am ?
Is there someone else now ? Someone new amidst the clouds to witch you have taken them with just the magic of your gaze ?
Is there someone else’s name newly etched upon your heart , or is it still mine , but waining with every day passing in my absence .
I wonder if you still know how much I love you , how much I wanted you in my tomorrow’s , and how sad I am living In yesterday’s past .
I wonder if ......
I wonder ......
Do you wonder too ???
Jan 28, 2020
Jan 28, 2020 at 10:57 PM UTC
Secrets in the night
Once again
In the presence of an old friend
A confidant
The onyx curtain blankets the horizon
Deepening with the waining moon
A window to Infinity
I speak
Incoherent ramblings , jumbled thoughts
To pleads for insight ,
Advice
I've rehearsed moving monologues , poems , and goodbyes .
Asked her to marry me hundreds of times
And cried at the rejection , while asking why .
Ahhh yes you my love, were the subject of many of the meetings
Therapeutic sessions late night talks .
Amidst the depths of this onyx abyss ,
Now murmuring along with the twinkling stars
Are all nuances , feelings , put I to words
I love you darlin
I've always loved you , you are every breath I take
The sun rises and sets , with the blink of your smile.
I've shared this only with my friend.
He knows you
As I do
Helped me realize , I can't help my heart ,
He knows , I can't help but love you .
He knows I adore you .
He knows ill be back out here tomorrow .
The shadow of my soul
The midnight sky
The unwavering ear
He knows
Ill be back , with you on my mind,
Heavy on my heart .
I love you ,
And once again ,
I'm in the presence , of an old friend .....
Sharing secrets in the night
Oct 6, 2014
Oct 6, 2014 at 7:54 PM UTC
It came tumbling
My heart
And you caught it
Didn't know it could
Find a home
In comfortable silence
(most of the time)
And reverent observance of southwestern mountain ranges
crimson with the sun's waining blood
Your hand was elegant and kind as it reached out for mine
The most guileless beckoning to succumb
To our spiritual commingling and the beginning of us
May 17, 2016
May 17, 2016 at 9:32 PM UTC
As if the crests of the waves were slumping shoulders
I watch them roll away
Fingers sifting through the tide
A futile attempt to hold on
The moon lays a pathway
On the surface of the sea
Just another empty road
Why ?
Hopeless tenants we are
At the mercy of our surroundings
My love , my ocean , my world
I'm drowning
We floated on our hearts
Tied together by our kindred spirits
Undone by indecision and Under appreciation
My tears make no difference
On the surface of the sea
Or her hardened heart
Mine has lost its buoyancy
Without hers to hold me
I taste the salt on my lips
Just like my tears
Suffocating without her
My love
The pathway fades in the waining of the moon
The current grabs me
Just as her heart did
Hopeless travelers , at the mercy of our affections
Without her ,
I'm lost at sea ........
I love you
Oct 9, 2014
Oct 9, 2014 at 12:35 PM UTC