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"preoccupation" poems
sometimes it’s not the world that is loud, there’s no rain, no grey cloud, sometimes it’s a storm inside of me, where the wind is strong, like a very cold breeze. sometimes it’s the rain in my soul, pouring emotions, telling me to let go, sometimes it’s not the outside world, that is loud, it’s my inner peace that whirls around and has been gathering war clouds because sometimes there’s too much stress, to many thoughts, an excess it’s not life’s best part but sometimes there’s a storm in my heart. there are lightning’s, even thunder, and I feel like I’m going under but I better calm down, there’s no need for me to drown. I pick myself up, piece by piece it’s not a fight without cease there’s no need for preoccupation, as long as I am, my own salvation. - gio
0
Nov 8, 2020
Nov 8, 2020 at 1:07 PM UTC
inner storm
It's unfortunate that Parisians Are very hard to bear, In terms of flash obsequiousity, They drive me to despair! And patience is an attribute I don't profess to have To mercifully administer When accents veer to Slav. Baltics look like jellyfish, The Germans are obscene And loud and overbearing But the Swiss are very clean. Italians are a swarthy lot Who gourmandize on food And sacrifice their suavity By being impudently crude. The Spanish are no better, In fact they are probably worse, For obsessing in the blood sports I actually rate them in reverse. Starchiness is British They're convoluted to the core, The Old Boy system's lost it's sheen Aspirants flock to it no more. The Yanks are looking slightly crass Whilst fighting foreign wars, Their pinky held up squeaky clean To call "foul" to China's flaws. China sits inscrutably Holding all the cards Waiting for the moment To strike beneath the guards. India and Pakistan Are squabbling like kids The uproar over Kashmir Rates them lower than the Yids. The Yids are walking tightropes With Iran's nuclear ****** Whilst currying Yank approval, Eventual bombing is a must. The Dutch behave so anally They're always proven right When faced with rigid negatives They blanch with haunches tight. But not the Argentineans They love to dance and flirt, To chase the senorita Cavorting in the scarlet skirt. The South Pacific's wallowing They're adrift from World affairs Oz's self preoccupation Mirrors Kiwi's vacant stares. Africa's way past comment Lost to heat and dust, Warfare, **** and pillage And the rest decayed by rust. Eskimos are OK Clean living on the ice The population static, Zer-O pollution's nice! Marshalg @theGate Mangere Bridge 14 April 2009
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May 2, 2010
May 2, 2010 at 12:08 AM UTC
Eskimos are OK!
It's unfortunate that Parisians Are very hard to bear, In terms of flash obsequiousity, They drive me to despair! And patience is an attribute I don't profess to have To mercifully administer When accents veer to Slav. Baltics look like jellyfish, The Germans are obscene And loud and overbearing But the Swiss are very clean. Italians are a swarthy lot Who gourmandize on food And sacrifice their suavity By being impudently crude. The Spanish are no better, In fact they are probably worse, For obsessing in the blood sports I actually rate them in reverse. Starchiness is British They're convoluted to the core, The Old Boy system's lost it's sheen Aspirants flock to it no more. The Yanks are looking slightly crass Whilst fighting foreign wars, Their pinky held up squeaky clean To call "foul" to China's flaws. China sits inscrutably Holding all the cards Waiting for the moment To strike beneath the guards. India and Pakistan Are squabbling like kids The uproar over Kashmir Rates them lower than the Yids. The Yids are walking tightropes With Iran's nuclear ****** Whilst currying Yank approval, Eventual bombing is a must. The Dutch behave so anally They're always proven right When faced with rigid negatives They blanch with haunches tight. But not the Argentineans They love to dance and flirt, To chase the senorita Cavorting in the scarlet skirt. The South Pacific's wallowing They're adrift from World affairs Oz's self preoccupation Mirrors Kiwi's vacant stares. Africa's way past comment Lost to heat and dust, Warfare, **** and pillage And the rest decayed by rust. Eskimos are OK Clean living on the ice The population static, Zer-O pollution's nice! Marshalg @theGate Mangere Bridge 14 April 2009
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64
When A Man Loves A Woman, He Will. Let us end this weekend by talking about the love between a man and a woman. To the ladies who often ask, “How do I truly know a man loves me?” this is for you. When a man loves a woman, he will never cheat on her. Never! He will find other women that throw themselves at him repulsive, however beautiful, they might be. That does not mean he has to profess a zillion times in a day how much he loves you. A man who does that is often a player. Talk is cheap. To a man who loves, actions speak louder than thunder, even in his subtlety! If you are an intuitive woman, you will know how much you are loved without even hearing the “three magical words.” There will be love in the way he looks in those lovely eyes of yours, in the way he holds your hands, in the tenderness of his text messages, in the attention he gives you, and in the care he takes in choosing the gifts he give you, and in the way he speaks to you. It is widely acknowledged that men love *** If a man says he does not love *** he is a shameless liar or a capon. God, we love *** Yet, paradoxically, when a man truly loves a woman, *** with her is the last thing on his mind. His interest in her is holistic, not just the apple she has to offer. He wants you for the rest of his life, and his single preoccupation from the moment he meets you, will be to put a ring on your finger so you can carry his name as Mrs…(Insert your man’s name) as a badge of honour. A man who truly loves you knows you meticulously. He knows what puts a smile on those rosy lips of yours. He knows what to say and what to do both in the good and bad times. He knows your kind of music or your kind of book. If you are a chocolate lady, he knows your kind of chocolate, if you are the romantic type he knows when to take you for moonlight strolls. Basically he will love you like you have never been loved before. In all, a man who loves you will do anything. I mean ANYTHING for the woman he loves.
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Jul 23, 2015
Jul 23, 2015 at 7:52 AM UTC
WHEN A MAN LOVE A WOMAN
When A Man Loves A Woman, He Will. Let us end this weekend by talking about the love between a man and a woman. To the ladies who often ask, “How do I truly know a man loves me?” this is for you. When a man loves a woman, he will never cheat on her. Never! He will find other women that throw themselves at him repulsive, however beautiful, they might be. That does not mean he has to profess a zillion times in a day how much he loves you. A man who does that is often a player. Talk is cheap. To a man who loves, actions speak louder than thunder, even in his subtlety! If you are an intuitive woman, you will know how much you are loved without even hearing the “three magical words.” There will be love in the way he looks in those lovely eyes of yours, in the way he holds your hands, in the tenderness of his text messages, in the attention he gives you, and in the care he takes in choosing the gifts he give you, and in the way he speaks to you. It is widely acknowledged that men love *** If a man says he does not love *** he is a shameless liar or a capon. God, we love *** Yet, paradoxically, when a man truly loves a woman, *** with her is the last thing on his mind. His interest in her is holistic, not just the apple she has to offer. He wants you for the rest of his life, and his single preoccupation from the moment he meets you, will be to put a ring on your finger so you can carry his name as Mrs…(Insert your man’s name) as a badge of honour. A man who truly loves you knows you meticulously. He knows what puts a smile on those rosy lips of yours. He knows what to say and what to do both in the good and bad times. He knows your kind of music or your kind of book. If you are a chocolate lady, he knows your kind of chocolate, if you are the romantic type he knows when to take you for moonlight strolls. Basically he will love you like you have never been loved before. In all, a man who loves you will do anything. I mean ANYTHING for the woman he loves.
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6
***** given Uncovered - Hidden Under hand, under night Through the covers your eyes Reflecting the moon and dilate. A dusting of rain, a romantic patter Fingers walking your ******* Outside and inside we exist as weather Breath of wind running with sweat. Like the rain tracing our window We drip our salty drips; No secrets, preoccupation - Only Temptation to exist - Let me know when you're ready, Ready to let go.
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Jul 2, 2015
Jul 2, 2015 at 6:25 PM UTC
loving ***
I’ve summed up the equation for my isolation It's People who look up, look down, left and right Desperate for information We never looked inside for much needed inspiration Instead, We lead a life of impulsive behavior mixed with preoccupation for our own reputation I've lost toleration for the weak minded population Individual thoughts slowly decay and eventually cut off circulation Sending thoughts on permanent vacation, worthy of respiration, ideas now suffer suffocation If this is my "generation" I’d rather live in hibernation You can take this as retaliation I just don’t understand why we seek gratification for having no imagination? I swear, It’s like the world around me is nothing more Than telecommunication Different voices yet the same conversation Broad interpretation leaves room for destructive ********** Shedding uniqueness for trendy consolidation **Who the **** do you think you are? a star?** You're no constellation You expel no illumination Your personality is a narrow cultivation of Seedy corporation, Media publication, And lack of moral stabilization Let me give you clarification Meditation is my detonation Put words in your mouth before you die of starvation We all have a fixation on giving into temptation Putting ourselves in situations were Passion is stimulation, Trust is manipulation and Love is *********** Pour out your heartache in perspiration After *********** we expect a standing ovation *** is nothing more than sensation* ....are we lost beyond the point of navigation?
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Nov 28, 2011
Nov 28, 2011 at 12:35 AM UTC
Meditation is My Detonation
I’ve summed up the equation for my isolation It's People who look up, look down, left and right Desperate for information We never looked inside for much needed inspiration Instead, We lead a life of impulsive behavior mixed with preoccupation for our own reputation I've lost toleration for the weak minded population Individual thoughts slowly decay and eventually cut off circulation Sending thoughts on permanent vacation, worthy of respiration, ideas now suffer suffocation If this is my "generation" I’d rather live in hibernation You can take this as retaliation I just don’t understand why we seek gratification for having no imagination? I swear, It’s like the world around me is nothing more Than telecommunication Different voices yet the same conversation Broad interpretation leaves room for destructive ********** Shedding uniqueness for trendy consolidation **Who the **** do you think you are? a star?** You're no constellation You expel no illumination Your personality is a narrow cultivation of Seedy corporation, Media publication, And lack of moral stabilization Let me give you clarification Meditation is my detonation Put words in your mouth before you die of starvation We all have a fixation on giving into temptation Putting ourselves in situations were Passion is stimulation, Trust is manipulation and Love is *********** Pour out your heartache in perspiration After *********** we expect a standing ovation *** is nothing more than sensation* ....are we lost beyond the point of navigation?
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37
I have a confession It's called an obsession. A preoccupation With my aggression I feel it building Like Lego for adults Doctors say it's part and parcel of my Depression. If that's the case then All serial killers and not nice people are just depressed. Not obsessed with hurt or pain or emotion. Just a little down Take a pill Chill. Don't **** Don't obsess You're just depressed.
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May 15, 2014
May 15, 2014 at 9:07 AM UTC
Obsession
The world is full of hatred and spite, It may come as a surprise Oh innocent youth, But allow me to reprise, The world is full of hatred and spite. Oh innocent youth, Change it, we must, In the way we see fit. Take charge of the reigns, And demolish the parts causing the most pain. Ignorance and Arrogance Are the Gods of the day, Lack of wanting or caring For the power of knowledge, Content to be slaves, Lost in their ways. Oh tainted youth, How far will this path take us? Destroying our home, our friendships, our lives, Our bodies, our minds, our dreams, Crushed and broken, Until nothing is left, Nothing except subservient beings. Oh enraged youth, How do we change the events set into motion, Call me a radical but I have such a notion. Seek knowledge, peace, Love, and understanding. In these virtues you will find The mind’s true elation, Then, and only then, Will you break free From the grip of preoccupation. Oh enlightened youth, When and how will our voices be heard? Whenever it is, we break ranks from the herd. It will require us all, Brothers, sisters, blacks, and whites, No group left uncalled, For fear that upon deaf ears our efforts should fall, Oh empowered youth, With these tools we must fashion, Our revolution of choice, With chests out and heads high, We will make sure they hear, Our unified voice. For without the power of us, There will be no change, But the power of us Is a force to reckon, Yet we must keep our path straight, And let it not derange. Oh complacent youth, I fear that change should not come, Soon enough, or yet at all, Unless we stand tall, and call, For those in their hall, To Bring Down their Wall. When we treat all equal, With love and respect, We will have won. But what do you expect? Oh innocent youth, This will not happen, it cannot happen, The world is filled with Hatred and Spite, And I fear we will gaze eternally, At our cause, fading, Into that great twilight.
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Nov 27, 2011
Nov 27, 2011 at 9:49 PM UTC
Innocent Youth
The world is full of hatred and spite, It may come as a surprise Oh innocent youth, But allow me to reprise, The world is full of hatred and spite. Oh innocent youth, Change it, we must, In the way we see fit. Take charge of the reigns, And demolish the parts causing the most pain. Ignorance and Arrogance Are the Gods of the day, Lack of wanting or caring For the power of knowledge, Content to be slaves, Lost in their ways. Oh tainted youth, How far will this path take us? Destroying our home, our friendships, our lives, Our bodies, our minds, our dreams, Crushed and broken, Until nothing is left, Nothing except subservient beings. Oh enraged youth, How do we change the events set into motion, Call me a radical but I have such a notion. Seek knowledge, peace, Love, and understanding. In these virtues you will find The mind’s true elation, Then, and only then, Will you break free From the grip of preoccupation. Oh enlightened youth, When and how will our voices be heard? Whenever it is, we break ranks from the herd. It will require us all, Brothers, sisters, blacks, and whites, No group left uncalled, For fear that upon deaf ears our efforts should fall, Oh empowered youth, With these tools we must fashion, Our revolution of choice, With chests out and heads high, We will make sure they hear, Our unified voice. For without the power of us, There will be no change, But the power of us Is a force to reckon, Yet we must keep our path straight, And let it not derange. Oh complacent youth, I fear that change should not come, Soon enough, or yet at all, Unless we stand tall, and call, For those in their hall, To Bring Down their Wall. When we treat all equal, With love and respect, We will have won. But what do you expect? Oh innocent youth, This will not happen, it cannot happen, The world is filled with Hatred and Spite, And I fear we will gaze eternally, At our cause, fading, Into that great twilight.
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71
do we know whose bold hand proffered the apple? both languished in paradise, wander and eat, making love their primary preoccupation... do we know who named the animals, the trees and birds and flowers? when stewardship became dominion.. do we know what knowledge means? recognizing your ****** seems a small price to pay for the world of emotion - lust's sharp intensity, the fierceness of anger or a kiss... do we know the humble serpent -God's creation- was to blame? curiosity perhaps, or boredom more likely, ensconced in a gorgeous garden living know-nothings their idle exploration of Eden. who wrote this story? who made these myths? what is now an ossified creed was then a nascent religion; many claiming the one Truth. beliefs in faith-based fact flourishing - all the debates on divinity. the Garden, The Woman, the Snake and the Tree this account survived, recorded and writ for ages a myth that may never have happened.. this ancient story lives on to confirm the sin and rattle the soul.
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Mar 2, 2012
Mar 2, 2012 at 12:57 PM UTC
eden
Transnational capitalism is a gluttonous preoccupation of the aristocrat. Although Simone De Beauvoir nailed her colors to the metaphorical mast of equality, it is reasonable to acknowledge that our perimeter lies beyond intra-personal vistas of gender identity and ****** preference. The Lord of the Manor will grant entry to your greasy soul, if you embrace the common denominator of anthropological affiliation. So, weary pilgrim, on this treacherous journey of presumed arrival: I urge you to identify that spiritual lobotomy of the majority where ontological convenience jeopardises the rich tapestry of our planet’s pulse. Collectivism has a cosmological duality which will never be reconciled as long as parliamentary ridicule insults the intelligence of equilibrium. Whatever happened to democracy? And, why do you simply conform to dictatorial messages which sink their teeth into the very flesh of community existence? We may not be able to alter the direction of the wind, but we can truly adjust our sails.
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Dec 31, 2013
Dec 31, 2013 at 3:55 PM UTC
Revolting Modernity
Preoccupation with making something permanent A feeling of expectation incorporation of a certain situation or habitation into life, for good It makes me freak out. Desire, for a certain thing to happen fear of that something actually happening Or that it's something that might be permanent. Worry, the attempt to find certainty the desire to control things. Control you, controlling me I'm afraid you'll find my black It will come back again. It's like an arc weld done incorrectly Eventually it will start to bleed And fall apart. But I dreamt about welding and you welding me into something permanent something desirable something non-penetrable. You had me molded against the truck and... I don't know who you are, but you put your fire in me So deeply it burns. A fire that firefighters can't dissolve Doctors can't resolve. You're in me, and I love you.
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Sep 17, 2017
Sep 17, 2017 at 7:15 PM UTC
A Dream of Hope
I pulled into the Starbucks parking lot with the force of a lion after its prey and with the lethargy of one whom had not eaten in weeks drudging up that last ounce of strength to obtain survival my eyelashes had mascara from the night before and my hair was thick with day-old hairspray hiding behind sunglasses, I shifted my weight for relief from the flip-flops rubbing unpleasantly between my toes keenly aware of the headache above my eyes I got my coffee and was prepared to flee back to my den where I could devour it, keeping a wary eye on would be thieves as my fatigue and I walked hastily towards the exit Life happened. To my left, sat a couple side by side they wore the casual clothes of confidence and serenity he sat by the fireplace, his glasses sat at the end of his nose her body leaned close to the man she loved, and forward to see the book that was laid open on the table in front of them curious minds swallowed the words that were offered there under gray hair, hands holding, faint smiles formed on their lips I had never seen such a portrait of true contentment outside, the image kept speaking to my brain, despite my preoccupation and I saw you. and I saw me. in thirty years, a virtual lifetime our aging together; maturing, evolving, creating side by side, ever content, with books, love and coffee.
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Aug 22, 2013
Aug 22, 2013 at 12:05 PM UTC
A Double Shot of Espresso
We strode together in another age, my love, You, in your earthen gown and beautiful dark tresses. I, the wearer of the long plaited, thong and sinew sandal. You and I, we strode through quiet valleys of tall conifer Where huge rock falls left monolithic edifices... as monuments to past largess. Together we walked as one, in a world much simpler than the one we live in now. In a time, without the inhibition of contrivance or sophistication. We walked in clarity and drank from clear, clean waters. We dallied in the honeyed light of a huge, summer moon. A field of dandy lions in the warm April sunshine, was the byre in which we made love and produced our babies. A love ... un-harried, unhurried and devoid of any preoccupation other than that of the beautiful desire We felt for each other. The love we feel now is the same as the love shared then; But in this age it is diluted and complicated by the urgencies and imperatives of the day. Then there was just time...given and taken. Without cost or penalty, without blame or insinuation, without hurt or harm. Time in that better age...was a friend.   A friend who augmented the beauty of today into the promise of tomorrow, A friend who exchanged the serenity of yesterday for the excitement of the new day’s dawn. This was our time, when the bond of eternity sealed our commitment to each other. For however many lifetimes we may live in... We shall be one. Marshalg For darling Janet 12 September 2011
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Sep 12, 2011
Sep 12, 2011 at 3:14 PM UTC
Commitment
Chairs were creaking from the strain of ignorance, as the habit of ignorant anticipation gripped the edge of a creative moment to disrupt thoughts which hoped to choose the pastel colors of an expressive photograph. Rather than deep garden saturation, the light, fading to become ghosts of movement, offered a place of acceptance. Shrugs rounded the shoulders of the road, so it could be claimed that no responsibility hindered the development of suspension systems. Political levitation supported the dancers as they turned onto the public stage in a forum of occupation. The state of the street, in the absence of smooth nylon, brought the parachutes down to flutter, disconsolately, above the pavement. Single waves of regret were drawn to leave the stage, but, as this effort was declined, determination measured resolve based upon community options, described in the local papers. Setting the pages down, each day, the play became enamel baked onto the restoration and the satisfaction which kept them all together as a group. Certain curtains were raised, as others were lowered to close the door excluding the poor from the equal share of space related to the experiments of the place. Conversation by clerks sculpted freedom to crimp the brass cases in ways not accepted by sprites in mid flight. These were the colors in the ledger interpreted as shades of gray or flashing midnight blue, faint copper, and pearly white. Forces of education were dismissed as a superficial demonstration indicating the character, intensive. Thus, they were reaching for the money, but funding remained a gift offered only to those admired and, through the glass, profitable by cultural attributes. Some thought the process was the singular importance of an event. The dancers were dreaming, as they rehearsed. Another kind of artist discarded the event in favor of the documents and images meant to persist. These, the dancing players favored as memories to be contemplated, some to be cherished. Materialism, since it included spirit, ruled the transient existence experienced as joy. Perception brought enjoyment into being, yet when the unusual critic walked away, it was a dispossession. Other critics were members of the team.
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Dec 26, 2013
Dec 26, 2013 at 8:36 PM UTC
Intensive Preoccupation For The Press
Chairs were creaking from the strain of ignorance, as the habit of ignorant anticipation gripped the edge of a creative moment to disrupt thoughts which hoped to choose the pastel colors of an expressive photograph. Rather than deep garden saturation, the light, fading to become ghosts of movement, offered a place of acceptance. Shrugs rounded the shoulders of the road, so it could be claimed that no responsibility hindered the development of suspension systems. Political levitation supported the dancers as they turned onto the public stage in a forum of occupation. The state of the street, in the absence of smooth nylon, brought the parachutes down to flutter, disconsolately, above the pavement. Single waves of regret were drawn to leave the stage, but, as this effort was declined, determination measured resolve based upon community options, described in the local papers. Setting the pages down, each day, the play became enamel baked onto the restoration and the satisfaction which kept them all together as a group. Certain curtains were raised, as others were lowered to close the door excluding the poor from the equal share of space related to the experiments of the place. Conversation by clerks sculpted freedom to crimp the brass cases in ways not accepted by sprites in mid flight. These were the colors in the ledger interpreted as shades of gray or flashing midnight blue, faint copper, and pearly white. Forces of education were dismissed as a superficial demonstration indicating the character, intensive. Thus, they were reaching for the money, but funding remained a gift offered only to those admired and, through the glass, profitable by cultural attributes. Some thought the process was the singular importance of an event. The dancers were dreaming, as they rehearsed. Another kind of artist discarded the event in favor of the documents and images meant to persist. These, the dancing players favored as memories to be contemplated, some to be cherished. Materialism, since it included spirit, ruled the transient existence experienced as joy. Perception brought enjoyment into being, yet when the unusual critic walked away, it was a dispossession. Other critics were members of the team.
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46
prognosis: passive preoccupation adulation of vacuous aversion careless cupid, cleaving cardiac to the closet consecrated courtship of wedded hemlock feasting on desolate devotion ceremonious shedding of sacred tears laced with lone loss
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Dec 23, 2017
Dec 23, 2017 at 10:59 AM UTC
Starcrossed
This senseless self-preoccupation sends me straight to Hell and I can’t tell if it’s your fault or mine it’s fine either way, I’m not sure I care at this point I’m just tired of every piece of my life feeling so painfully out of joint my heart conjoined with assumed opinions and criticism that even Satan would call excessive And I push you away like you put this on me that you expect me to be just like everybody else or maybe that perspective veils the reality that I know I was made for more than this ******* away my time and energy worrying about if I measure up to what you expect of me I mean, you want me to look like your firstborn son how can I even begin to measure up to that after everything I’ve done? or at least this is the tape I run repeatedly in my head And in a way it’s like I dread hearing anything besides it because if I hear a different sound I’m bound to bigger responsibility and I’m pushed to the brink And I find myself sinking beneath the terrible thought that you’re disappointed in me That you find me disgusting and can’t wait to be rid of me But while I’m making self-pity my revelry I so often fail to see the devilry of my thoughts not catching that I’m thinking way more highly of my brokenness than I ought and we’ve fought over this more times than I can count, I know. God, how many more times do you have to show me that the way I think just doesn’t work? How many more times will you remind me I’m not loved because it’s earned? That Jesus took on the curse that I deserved I’ve read and heard the story a thousand times even though I forget it at the drop of a dime so remind me again, I don’t have to try so hard to be the son you want and that... you’re not nearly as far away from me as I think you are
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Nov 23, 2018
Nov 23, 2018 at 5:31 PM UTC
Bad Son
This senseless self-preoccupation sends me straight to Hell and I can’t tell if it’s your fault or mine it’s fine either way, I’m not sure I care at this point I’m just tired of every piece of my life feeling so painfully out of joint my heart conjoined with assumed opinions and criticism that even Satan would call excessive And I push you away like you put this on me that you expect me to be just like everybody else or maybe that perspective veils the reality that I know I was made for more than this ******* away my time and energy worrying about if I measure up to what you expect of me I mean, you want me to look like your firstborn son how can I even begin to measure up to that after everything I’ve done? or at least this is the tape I run repeatedly in my head And in a way it’s like I dread hearing anything besides it because if I hear a different sound I’m bound to bigger responsibility and I’m pushed to the brink And I find myself sinking beneath the terrible thought that you’re disappointed in me That you find me disgusting and can’t wait to be rid of me But while I’m making self-pity my revelry I so often fail to see the devilry of my thoughts not catching that I’m thinking way more highly of my brokenness than I ought and we’ve fought over this more times than I can count, I know. God, how many more times do you have to show me that the way I think just doesn’t work? How many more times will you remind me I’m not loved because it’s earned? That Jesus took on the curse that I deserved I’ve read and heard the story a thousand times even though I forget it at the drop of a dime so remind me again, I don’t have to try so hard to be the son you want and that... you’re not nearly as far away from me as I think you are
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30
Do my eyes fail me? Is the light of the sun useless? for though in daylight I have walked abroad from the confined barrel I live in away from the rats away a while from the stray dogs that congregate outside my hovel that want a bit of my sack of carrots and discarded meat that I picked up from the market; and though I walked often with firm steps and keen eyes I did not see a man, a woman, a human worth their salt; and so I walk now (for perhaps my eyes do fail me and the light of the sun and moon is perhaps an illusion) and so I walk now with a lantern even in broad daylight and still I do not see a man, a woman, a human worth their salt; what I see are swirls of violence and greed and pettiness and whorls of self-preoccupation and bigotry and ignorance and narrowness all encased in flesh and bones: leave me Sirs and sweet-dressed and made-up Ladies and Children corrupt in the World of Adult Fanfare; leave me and let me go on my quest further afield as far as the lantern will allow me even in this bright day ruled by the sun and ruined by you Sneering Living Beings; leave me to wander as far to see if I cannot perhaps find a human in some corner….a surprise as one might find a gold coin in some dark corner…. And I so hope that today perhaps I shall find the human this bright day by the light of this lantern and not like yesterday and all days before search in vain till the lantern light dies and crawl back to my hovel not finding one free of these or at least sincere, and so worthy of the name of human…
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Oct 2, 2010
Oct 2, 2010 at 10:41 AM UTC
Diogenes searches for human beings
Do my eyes fail me? Is the light of the sun useless? for though in daylight I have walked abroad from the confined barrel I live in away from the rats away a while from the stray dogs that congregate outside my hovel that want a bit of my sack of carrots and discarded meat that I picked up from the market; and though I walked often with firm steps and keen eyes I did not see a man, a woman, a human worth their salt; and so I walk now (for perhaps my eyes do fail me and the light of the sun and moon is perhaps an illusion) and so I walk now with a lantern even in broad daylight and still I do not see a man, a woman, a human worth their salt; what I see are swirls of violence and greed and pettiness and whorls of self-preoccupation and bigotry and ignorance and narrowness all encased in flesh and bones: leave me Sirs and sweet-dressed and made-up Ladies and Children corrupt in the World of Adult Fanfare; leave me and let me go on my quest further afield as far as the lantern will allow me even in this bright day ruled by the sun and ruined by you Sneering Living Beings; leave me to wander as far to see if I cannot perhaps find a human in some corner….a surprise as one might find a gold coin in some dark corner…. And I so hope that today perhaps I shall find the human this bright day by the light of this lantern and not like yesterday and all days before search in vain till the lantern light dies and crawl back to my hovel not finding one free of these or at least sincere, and so worthy of the name of human…
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38
Part of me wants to hold the pain the way I wish I could hold you it feels more productive than letting go. How can I allow the process, the universe, god to take care of itself, when there is pain? As if the preoccupation with the possibilities, will protect you more than my prayers as if the pain were a sentinel. I hold the pain as a dagger. Stabbing into the darkness, into the void. Fending off invisible foe, parrying against suffering. No one leaves life unscathed, and so I fail you. I cannot protect you from life. My honor is tarnished. My love, please know, I will be here when you are happy, And especially when you are sad, scared, lonely. When life bears down, and the weight is too much, I will be here, prying apart the dimensions, As an anchor to reality My precious one, You are beloved since always. This love has always been, and always will be. When all returns to the great silence, This love remains eternal.
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Jun 30, 2023
Jun 30, 2023 at 12:06 AM UTC
Greatest Love of All Time
I miss being kissed Miss the way its unexpected strangely exquisite mundane to know there are lips waiting loving needing your own Not so much for the own desire maybe for the satisfaction inky safe preoccupation of proving your existence deliverance and desirability and to not be alone. Soft skin, a subtle glance, it is this that I miss. She needs to be kissed.
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Aug 29, 2015
Aug 29, 2015 at 3:23 PM UTC
I miss being kissed
You are all out there Sinning the good sins And I'm home-- Just home-- With a sinful mind And idle fingers, Wishing such Lasciviousness Upon Myself, Longing For the bliss of the Forbidden. Almost-innocent tears (for I am not without fault) Pass through me In girlish stupidity. I don't want this Preoccupation. I would prefer Cognizant frolicking In that which is Taboo. If I cannot have peace, I would have sin in its stead. -LP
0
Nov 30, 2013
Nov 30, 2013 at 1:13 AM UTC
Thoughts on The Ark of the Covenant
Danses-elle, en reverie You are the spastic source of the ocean life form Moving between your cage of ribs To juxtapose the gray, the human decay, and the Preoccupation of what can, who should, What you might and come what may – Waking up with a stranger in bed to have Wine in the morning, starve the dismay Evenings of making coffee and sense, Making away with the day La fille, danse Pacific sway Pas de cheval, mais actuellement Il est le pas d’homme naturel There are a lot of things ugly about a place Where we chase until fall out, fall away Into acting offstage, and we can’t get away, no no Dance on, girl Dans la rue des esprits anciens And we’ll dance and we’ll dance
0
Feb 27, 2012
Feb 27, 2012 at 9:06 AM UTC
La fille, danse
*What mighty importance rests so fat on the shoulders of you that i'm refused the right to lay love where I want it grown? Bonds can loosen Loads you've carried furthest can be shared I know Trust is earned but it's Earnest too, when I demonstrate it purely, Laying all my bones at all your doors as promises and gifts I'll even renew - if you want - That honest vow to remember all your birthdays to Topple on your soul If you need the weight of someone not you. Can we be side by side In a blurred rush towards the singularity? or Am I the *** you lead to water - am I the water itself? Don't let me place-hold or keep the seat warm for overdue truths There's no need to balance each other's acts of self sabotage Or to pretend Either of us is any more than what we are We both understand That grace is to us just brightly coloured feathers. Please let us be safe Together, in that disappointing mess And let me work on Those snags of control and owning and having Because I don't remember how you became confection behind a window What made me Treat you as the best since...sliced boys but My diet did change I didn't want to spoil you for lesser bread and Now a hunger and rot collide in the vacant spaces you're yielding. Is it an upset to cry at your objection to my care Or when I kick and scream at the labels you stick to me When you call me callous Hysterical and paranoid to preoccupation Incurring open fire and pointed barbs about your ***** Mother Who ruined you for women, love You, who will only ever be half aware of this and that. I'll go willingly though on display, to be mocked in silent penance For What else next but to try to hold you to me To try to sit as still As time and light do for me when you move in my direction and Be as hard as your endorsement makes me. But for all the noise Of our collapsing walls and siege machinery The poison that may never fully be drawn. You are here. I am here. What else are we gonna do.*
0
Jul 8, 2016
Jul 8, 2016 at 7:22 AM UTC
All My Arrowheads at All Your Doors
*What mighty importance rests so fat on the shoulders of you that i'm refused the right to lay love where I want it grown? Bonds can loosen Loads you've carried furthest can be shared I know Trust is earned but it's Earnest too, when I demonstrate it purely, Laying all my bones at all your doors as promises and gifts I'll even renew - if you want - That honest vow to remember all your birthdays to Topple on your soul If you need the weight of someone not you. Can we be side by side In a blurred rush towards the singularity? or Am I the *** you lead to water - am I the water itself? Don't let me place-hold or keep the seat warm for overdue truths There's no need to balance each other's acts of self sabotage Or to pretend Either of us is any more than what we are We both understand That grace is to us just brightly coloured feathers. Please let us be safe Together, in that disappointing mess And let me work on Those snags of control and owning and having Because I don't remember how you became confection behind a window What made me Treat you as the best since...sliced boys but My diet did change I didn't want to spoil you for lesser bread and Now a hunger and rot collide in the vacant spaces you're yielding. Is it an upset to cry at your objection to my care Or when I kick and scream at the labels you stick to me When you call me callous Hysterical and paranoid to preoccupation Incurring open fire and pointed barbs about your ***** Mother Who ruined you for women, love You, who will only ever be half aware of this and that. I'll go willingly though on display, to be mocked in silent penance For What else next but to try to hold you to me To try to sit as still As time and light do for me when you move in my direction and Be as hard as your endorsement makes me. But for all the noise Of our collapsing walls and siege machinery The poison that may never fully be drawn. You are here. I am here. What else are we gonna do.*
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Let me enlighten you To a little thing I like to call Emotion. Despite the fact You may "distrust" these Prior females. they are surely More Preoccupied because Honey Nothing Changes a girls mind, like **** And Money. Your attachment to her Emotionally and Colorful assumption in thinking She has any Real mental Preoccupation with you is False.
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Jun 27, 2013
Jun 27, 2013 at 12:37 AM UTC
**** and money honey
My mind is filled with too much of you. Sometimes loudly at the forefront, re-enacting happy times. Sometimes muted at the back waving once in a while mischievously distracting. Other times you hung over my dark thoughts making me wish I have the physical you to grab hold of, to find comfort in. At times you are the dark thoughts, bluntly disproving all my assumptions of us, questioning my worthiness mocking my confidence. You are the overwhelming preoccupation I want to and don’t want to let go of. You fill up too much of my mind.
0
Mar 31, 2016
Mar 31, 2016 at 9:47 AM UTC
My Mind is filled with too much of You
Dealing with OCD is like losing your mind, You can be in a room full of people, yet all alone, Noone can ever know when the horrible thoughts will come and what they will be you just feel a buzz, a hum, a drone in your head and you try to block it out but like Sony Xperia apps running in the background, they are there, infernal consuming the bandwidth of your soul there is a fine line between delusion and sanity a clutching at straws, a search for help pleas and pleas fall not on deaf ears but endure it you must until it runs its course tunnelling on, pushing you to the edge straddling the fine line buoying bobbing, dancing, fleeting- drowning you in its wake as you gasp and gasp OCD is horrible and misunderstood why it hit me, I know not- when it came part of me, I never agreed I just woke up arrested, paralysed by the most unutterable thoughts... I suspect it happened when I met the thin woman with the one eye- I have known no peace since then Paranormal paranoia rules my brain and I am mooted, glued in the vile filth of guilt, shame, anger, helplessness- like a generator running on fuel, incessant the tyres do not stop burning alone, sometimes, I ask myself why? why me Lord? the cup is too heavy for me to bear and ghouls have made my mind an open playing field and I cant break free at times I wake up and its gone I smile and dress up- try to think normally, eat and sleep but itchy insomnia rages on my skin beads of sweat and shaking, my mouth is dry I am afraid, frightened and I cower OCD is crunching my life, slowly and sadly noone knows...they just dont know why I say 'off' things sometimes they suppose its the preoccupation of a busy mind, and busy I am wallowing, silently, stewing in the prison it seems there is no escaping this
0
Sep 17, 2014
Sep 17, 2014 at 1:55 AM UTC
O.C.D
Dealing with OCD is like losing your mind, You can be in a room full of people, yet all alone, Noone can ever know when the horrible thoughts will come and what they will be you just feel a buzz, a hum, a drone in your head and you try to block it out but like Sony Xperia apps running in the background, they are there, infernal consuming the bandwidth of your soul there is a fine line between delusion and sanity a clutching at straws, a search for help pleas and pleas fall not on deaf ears but endure it you must until it runs its course tunnelling on, pushing you to the edge straddling the fine line buoying bobbing, dancing, fleeting- drowning you in its wake as you gasp and gasp OCD is horrible and misunderstood why it hit me, I know not- when it came part of me, I never agreed I just woke up arrested, paralysed by the most unutterable thoughts... I suspect it happened when I met the thin woman with the one eye- I have known no peace since then Paranormal paranoia rules my brain and I am mooted, glued in the vile filth of guilt, shame, anger, helplessness- like a generator running on fuel, incessant the tyres do not stop burning alone, sometimes, I ask myself why? why me Lord? the cup is too heavy for me to bear and ghouls have made my mind an open playing field and I cant break free at times I wake up and its gone I smile and dress up- try to think normally, eat and sleep but itchy insomnia rages on my skin beads of sweat and shaking, my mouth is dry I am afraid, frightened and I cower OCD is crunching my life, slowly and sadly noone knows...they just dont know why I say 'off' things sometimes they suppose its the preoccupation of a busy mind, and busy I am wallowing, silently, stewing in the prison it seems there is no escaping this
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