I feel the water against my skin
I know when I am almost drowning
I can sense the snakes poking my atmosphere
As I draw my knife.


One of my eyes pinned
The other one the watch
Because I am naked
And nothing will hurt me again.

The hardest thing in the world
is loving someone who can't love
and who has never known of true love

I loved a girl who had a divergent mirror
And when she looked through that mirror
she saw things far from what they actually were

I was gonna slay dragons
and stop the time for you
But you rejected it
Somehow when I proclaimed my undying love for you
All you could hear is that I was gonna use your vulnerability
I am sorry you did not love yourself enough to let yourself see the truth

I was a wobbly little girl
Tortured by my devil
She chased and chased me
Hunting me down


Criticised my success
Laughed at my victory
Shortened my smiles
Prevented my laughs


My first tear
My only snap
My loudest sob
The whitest flag


I cried for help
there she was
I called emergency
there she was
I raced to school
there she was
I ran back home
there she was


Darkness flowed through her veins
Jealousy kept her running
Black magic empowered her
Sorcery concealed the naked


my head ******
my hands tied
my face torn
my vision blurred


Now she shoots and shoots
and shoots right through me
She strikes and strikes
and strikes up my smile


Protected by my love
I realised right then
I tried to die once
Never again.

did i miss u enough to drink or did i drink enough to miss u?
i honestly have no clue.
i want to drink to have fun.  
but that can’t seem to happen anymore.
i just drink n miss u more.
i love u so much.
why you gotta make me drink like this?

i love myself too much to hurt myself
but maybe not since i’m still w you.
i’m doing this to have a good time and to be happy but idk if i’m actually happy here w you.
i’m afraid to be like everyone else.
but i hear alla time abt these people
that stay w others bc they love them.
n i’m just like them.
you hurt me so many ******* times i cant count.
and i’m better than you, i really am.
i know i deserve better.
so then why the **** am i still with you?
maybe it’s because i know i’ll have to start over
w sb else if i wanna be as close to them.
maybe it’s bc you control me unknowingly and unwillingly.
and you’ve no clue what the ******* do to me.
i can’t understand myself but i know other people can understand me.
i know i’m not as unique as i like to think i am.
and my evidence is that i’m still w you when i know i deserve better.
so *******.

I reach out to nothing,
Expecting something,
Something deep and beautiful,
Complex, hard to follow.

I reach out to nothing,
With a broken hand, weakened heart, and shattered soul,
Picking up the pieces as I go.

I reach out to nothing,
While it never reaches back.
Yet I keep on reaching.
I am hopeless like that.