it's crazy how
a year and two days ago
I went on my first date,
a year ago next week
I had my first kiss
and
it almost killed us,
a year ago next month
I did something
I can't decide if I regret or not,
and a year ago this July
I leaned that I was head
over heels for someone
who was already three steps
ahead,
moving on.

I love you, the way you YOU...
The way you do... The way you dance,
The way you move,
The way you YOU,
The way you choose to NOT you,
Is you, and are you,
You are you,
Very thank you.

My body freezes.
My airways weezes.
I am pushed away from a deep sleep.
On so deep that my insides weep.
Upon waking up its hard to move.
Nothing I can really do.
So I lay here and stare.
Unable to move even if I dared.
Stuck here for minutes at a time.
Staring up at the roof hiding the sky.
Unable to let tears leave my eyes.
Here I stay unable to cry.
In a deep deep comma like state.
Here I lay here like a fish on a plate.

undone.
ah ah ah ah.
this linger in my walk is just the unraveling of my skin. I'll undo what has been done.
the eyes of my soul shift and shake when you are near. I hear the same words over and over saying that I should "move on." "it's over" "she's found someone else" "she's gone" "she'll never return even in my dreams because I was the ONE the let her and it's all my fault because I let her go. I let her move on with some other man who was much better and I sit in pity because it was all my fault." she told me she loved someone else when we're together. so. I let her leave to someone much better. they got together not even a week after I told her to leave. it wasn't so much her leaving was the honest pain in me. the pain was how quickly she left.
she was bad to me. she took what was mine and left for the midnight train leaving me on the track waiting to be run over.
i stood up. i walked off. i found me. i found that my love is as valuable as life it self. ghost oh ghost may you be gone forever. my bones may remember the touch because she was the first person to feel my marrow. calcium flows through my veins to build but i find peace in it. all these metaphors in my brain are no match for what my sanity has become.

My thighs sit in melancholic
harmonies
yearning for the
soft graze
of your tongue
and although
these emotions tend
to arrive in waves,
I am forcing the
drum in my
heart to play
a tune more upbeat.
-in case you thought you were irreplaceable

Every season passes by with time.
We have our seasons of love,our seasons or pain,our seasons of confusion on wether we are happy or wanting to cry,and our seasons of finally smiling.
We go through our year over and over again,and just carry on.
But whom all realizes every season they've become stronger. You've learned to trust,you've learned to love,you've learned to cry,you've learned to forgive,you've learned to stand up and smile once more. You'll learn in time each seasons different,each year. You'll learn to accept being vurnable, you'll learn to fall even when you don't want to,you'll learn how to be strong,you'll learn to say no and to let go,you'll learn to accept you are not perfect,and you'll understand no one is. You'll get the fact everyone has a past,you'll become to understand we mess up time after time,you'll learn to let the guarded wall on your heart down,you'll come to terms of being ok if you get heartbroken it isn't the end of the world. You'll find out what living a little is. It's gonna be just fine if you go out with someone and break up,that's sometimes a good thing,you figure out who's right for you and whom you'll love forever eventually. You'll learn it's ok to be happy when others are not. You'll know that you are yourself and you are one person,you don't have to carry everyone's weight around you choose too. It will be ok if you adventure out on your own. It will be just fine to live on your own and know who you are. It's also just fine to be friends with those who carry you down but you'll learn to put the sheild on going down with them. Always remember you choose each day if you'll open the blinds and light in or keep them closed and be in them dim light of things.-Lovey

Take a deep breath, sweet child
And soak in the fresh air that
Surrounds you, for you have time--
Though time doesn't mean a thing,
For it will all fall into place,
This life that has been fitted for you
And only you, it'll wait on you,
As you live in your very present
That has become my sweet history.

Slow down and smell the flowers
And remember that I love you.

You can call me miss now
That's what happen when you miss the train
The name of your station is "I Miss You"