the blood on this dental floss is muito rico!
i must write all about it;
that’ll show em.

{espero!}

but what will she think of it?
i think i'd like to be stuck to her,
like a plantain peel on a naked shore.
two giggling morons
under a chocolate moon.

{suspiro...}

yet i’m stuck in didactic verse.
in a winterland.
knitting sonnets about
oral hygiene
and shaky hands.

back in bed now,
the words start to come together:
“Scatter my ashes in Dublin, Ohio
  or the Bronx Zoo!"

I’m all over the place this morning.

i try to block out the noise
with more noise,
and yet I am still drowning in it all.
i am sinking, and god,
somebody please help me
(i am finally reaching, and still there is no one grasping my wrist and pulling me out)
i am ready to be told that
i am  w o r t h y
of so much more
than the sadness that wraps it's claws
around the base of my neck, tugging.
dragging me down, down, down
“ i am ready ”
the words are uttered into the dark of my room when the thoughts turn ****** and red.
“ i am ready ”
and my heart beats a violent rhythm to these words and
i am ready, so please, if You are out there,
send help.

I AM READY ( to be more ).

"You'll never know how much of yourself you drop
When you bend over to put up the limbs of someone else's.
You leave parts of yourself you can never pick up again
And you carry more than just a ****** arm or leg
You'd carry something else with you forever.
Always in your mind or soul.
Something you can never wash away."

See the faces, all the people,
    

      Smiling, dancing in the croud.
    

      All the music, and the love,
    

      In my mind It's too loud.
    



      Little children, and the elders
    

      They all look just the same.
    

      Please stop smiling, please stop laughing.
    

      You are all driving me insane.
    



      So many colors, in this venue,
    

      It's making me see red.
    

      Such a pain when they smile,
    

      Cure the pain when they're all dead.
    



      Take the knives and slit their throats,
    

      Skin the children like sheep and goats.
    

      Heads rolling on the ground,
    

      Turning smiles into cold dead frowns.
    



      As each one falls they start to change,
    

      The different colors become the same,
    

      The floor stained by blood and tears,
    

      My lust finally consumes my fears.
    



      I still hear moans as they crawl around,
    

      No! I must end that dreadful sound!
    

      I look to see who is still alive,
    

      The blood drips from my knife.
    



      And I see her crawling pleading to let her go,
    

      Shhh... Be silent, this is now my show.
    

      Her hair so soft as I rip it out,
    

      The knife enters her chest, as I kiss her mouth.
    



      Finally, silence, so blissful to me,
    

      But don't worry, I'm not insane, I'm just....crazy

Take me to an art museum on our first date  
       Snip pictures of me next to the masterpieces and when im hungry buy me a veggie burger and strawberry smoothie
          Compliment my kinks when I take out my braids tell me on gorgeous even on  
            those "****** days ".
Support my dream to strut the runway but dont force me to go to church on Sunday
                 Love me for who i am
                       Is all I ask
            Effort will take you a long way
         Once you complete this task

through a bruised eye
there’s little to see
but the scratches on my arms
and the rows of teeth
in your jagged grin.
i can’t move
from one side of the room
to the other
without your needle.
you nurse me back to health
in your ****** arms
and tear me down again,
stitch me up like a doll
and drag me home.
what can I say?
i guess I'm a sucker
for all that romantic crap.