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708 · Nov 2014
Callings
Sally A Bayan Nov 2014
10W X 3


It wasn't the rooster's crowing, 
that woke me
this morning.

The neighbor's pet's
loud declaration
intensifies.
blatantly,  
it is moaning.

Nightcalls are
noisier tonight
mating's unfinished
dauntlessly, cat
keeps calling.



Sally


Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
For Lady Jane, Brie, Gus, and other cat pets here on HP...
708 · May 2014
I Don't Have The Heart
Sally A Bayan May 2014
I Don't Have The Heart

0
    /\    0
     /\   /\

A  shower cooled us last night,
this morning is kind of drought-y.
one of those dry spell days.
everything is awry, misplaced,
displaced, or has to be replaced,
all sorts of problems, deadlines overwhelm me.

There are no developments or
movements outside to notice...
everything is still,
the leaves are motionless,
not even a whiff of a wind
to make the chimes move.
no colorful flowers, not even a bird in sight.
i am thinking the trees are bare,
the front garden is a desert.

Nobody wants to sit on the steel-hot garden seats
the rocking chair is like a statue
everything else is frozen....
except the hot, steaming temperature today.
nobody wants to sit on the steel-hot garden seats,
because i told everyone to leave me alone for a while...
because i couldn't let them see i was going through hell.

How do i free myself from this band
that confines every movement
of body and mind...
from being riveted to the chair where i sit?

I crossed my leg, swung it up and down
somebody almost got kicked...suddenly
small hands wrap my shoulders...
a small head rests on my chest,
as one thin thigh slowly lands on my lap...
i feel a warm breath on my left cheek,
a soft, gentle voice comes through my left ear:
"Hug, mama Sal...."
I don't have the heart
to ignore, or refuse a request from an angel,
my youngest granddaughter, Elisha Mae.....
her innocent eyes almost level with mine...

I hugged her back, planted kisses on top of her head
hummed softly and cradled her...
this lasted longer than expected
i had thought she was already asleep...
but my angel's attention was caught
by her sisters' shrieking, out in the garden...
angel ******, in a jiffy, my lap was empty
she joined her sisters, shouted with them,
swimming, having fun in their big vinyl pool...

I watched them from where I sat,
experiencing a different kind of joy,
as i listened to their voices, to the
splashing of water and all their other noises.
they will all calm down in a while, i expect...

The heavy feeling comes back, i realize,
the weighty anvil still exists
dimming the clarity, the flow...
here i am now, still struggling
with thoughts and words
misplaced
displaced, and those that must be
replaced...
i see no progress, there are still deadlines,
i am nowhere near restful waters...

But, i eagerly wait for this day,
this weighty dry spell day to pass...
this time, without shame, i shall  ask
reassuring hugs from my angel,
like a child, i shall tell her how
her warm, refreshing hugs could heal me, and
how i dread the thought of falling, sinking deeper,
down the sleepy waters of this River Lull.

Sally

Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan

**
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
People,
People who need people,
Are the luckiest people in the world
We're children, needing other children
And yet letting a grown-up pride
Hide all the need inside
Acting more like children than children
Lovers are very special people
They're the luckiest people in the world
With one person one very special person

A feeling deep in your soul
Says you were half, now you're whole
No more hunger and thirst
But first be a person who needs people
People who need people
Are the luckiest people in the world
With one person one very special person

No more hunger and thirst
But first be a person who needs people
People who need people
Are the luckiest people in the world
707 · Apr 2014
Old Friends
Sally A Bayan Apr 2014
Their eyes meet...
from two opposite corners of the room,
immediately recognizing,
but still familiarizing
eagerly staring
without faltering
each other' s thoughts, they are reading
yet, torn by hindrances existing...

But their hearts and minds overrule...
"forget the couples surrounding!
forget the music playing!
forget the shadows in the dance ongoing!"

Not a blink, not a wink...
eyes, seem deliberating,
steps, though measured, still move in haste,
walking,
the distance, lessening,
crossing,
nearing without knowing...
hands clasp
slowly,
tightly...
lovingly accepting...

Hearts are beating faster,
now communicating...
how could it be possible
to touch without touching?
thinking their lips, kissing,
to hug without embracing,
through their eyes,
caressing...

~~~it is time to escape~~~

Eyes still glued to each other,
face to face this moment,
here...now...
breath against breath,
lips...apart...begging...
both unaware
of their chests thumping...
arms seeking arms,
lips seeking lips...
this is the moment....
sweet, sweet surrender...
love, long withheld, to be released,
desire, has to be unleashed...


Two old lovers,
once lonely doves, now making love,
in their own passionate way,
making up for long lost times...

Two old lovers,
left with no choice but to
tread along life's beaten roads,
find comfort once again,
in each other' s warmth...
arms wouldn't dare let go,
never, never again....



Sally

Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A Bayan
706 · Jul 2021
Foggy Steps
Sally A Bayan Jul 2021
Billows of fog
are quickly creeping in,
white as smoke, forming
into a wavy set of steps
suspended...quivering,
and now beckons to me,

a soft voice calls my name
tells me not to be afraid...that it's
okay to climb the foggy stairs,
"i'll be there to meet you at the top,"
the voice assured me...

i must see the owner of the soft voice,
i feel i know him...he knows me well!
my right foot hesitates...but rises,
to take a step...

suddenly, a blow on my right arm
makes me open my eyes 👀 👀

my sister, sound asleep,
turns to my side, and
accidentally hits my arm
just in time,
:::::::::::::::
i was dreaming of my late father,
.................................again.


sally b

Copyright Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
February
(My late father often visited me in my dreams when I was small, until
I became a teenager.)
705 · Apr 2013
The Sky....
Sally A Bayan Apr 2013
I see the sky
in hues of blue,
so vast...
so unreachable...
I look at it on a clear day
and I travel along with my eyes....
I start chasing rainbows
hoping to find at the end,
my *** of gold......YOU!

Sally



Copyright 2013
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
704 · Feb 2014
Writer's Flood??? 10w
Sally A Bayan Feb 2014
When inspirations burst forth,
Needing to be unleashed...
What now???
A follow up to Pradip's Writer's Block.....

It is as much a dilemma as writer's block,
When ideas flow unstoppable
Seems your hands are tied,
You don't have the means,
Not a chance to write them all down...
What a waste...........
702 · Apr 2017
NIGHTMARE
Sally A Bayan Apr 2017
It's a bad dream..happens any moment
...late summer, or...early winter...
...suddenly, you're among unfamiliar faces,
....or places...in a  strange island, where,
a cloak of confusion spreads...thick,
to the skin, to the mind,  it sticks...
eyes gape, in fear...in panic...
there are only questions...no answers
those that had been asked, seem unasked...
.......
a moment of normalcy, a calm...arises,
...as if, you've woken from your bad dream
a bliss, that is momentary...because
....at the back of your mind, lurks,
a phantom fear...of the dark dream
setting in once again...of getting lost again,
alone...floating through the waters of oblivion
........and it is not known, when the waters
.....again, would clear...
........
this dream comes on and off, it frequents,
....up to a point...when yesterdays vanish
you're on your own...afraid...isolated...
.....what happens tomorrow when
your eyes meet with those of your loved ones,
would there be a spark? make you remember?
in that dream space of strange faces and surroundings?
why do you attempt to escape?
where does that urge to flee, come from?
why do you want to go unnoticed?
do you feel abandoned? are you hurt?
do you recognize that feeling?
.......
you struggle...and in brief moments of clarity,
your eyes ask the questions.......in silence...
"will i ever wake up from this nightmare?"
.......
It's a dream that can happen
.........in the late summer,
or early winter....of one's life...



Sally

Copyright April 24, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan

#npmdream #nightmare #oblivion #alzheimer'sdisease
(two older friends manifested early, but progressing signs of Alzheimer's Disease.
   I saw them deteriorate...smiling when in their normal minds;)
          as if nothing ever  happened.....one is gone...the other, still struggling.)
700 · Jul 2017
Streams~ ~ ~
Sally A Bayan Jul 2017
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Any time of day, when mind wanders,
it's like the water...splashes...escapes,
and flows down the precipice...
it spreads, surrounds, and creeps
...in and out of us......water sustains
...but....it can also drown us...

we come across big or small rivers,
...feel their depth....our feet, as feelers,
...narrow......running...calm......serene,
in cool colors of silver, blue or emerald green
they don't roar...they just make ripples
on the surface, when a breeze blows,
....dancing our blues away, on tiptoes

then, there are colder streams,
darker....where anguish, despair and
brokenness...comfortably dwell
...testing us....giving us choices...
some opt to float on the water,
thinking, none else matters~~~~~~
then, surrender to the rushing current,
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....when they could sway, or play
they could waltz with the water...

the wise ones dance...fight, with some art,
they do freestyle.....breast....or back,
or the wavy butterfly stroke,
til they find a most welcome shallow part...
.........:::::::::::::::::::...........
for those fed up...and trapped
...at some point, they give up
surrendering to the force of the current
they abandon their body and soul,
with nothing left behind,
...........just an absolute

...D..e..a..d......W..e..i..g..h..t...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Sally

Copyright July 25, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
^remembering a late friend, her smile lives on in my mind^
700 · Apr 2014
There, among the shelves...
Sally A Bayan Apr 2014
Finally,
experiencing the serenity
i've always hoped for earnestly
feeling that rush of air against  face
where eyes could roam in a vast space
the feel of wind to brush against skin
And the sight of trees to breathe in...

But, my feet brought me  here...
why in front of these  rows of stores?
never thought of stopping
to do some impulse shopping...
do i pamper myself with new stuff?
there's no need for a new scent,
with what i have, i am very much content.

There is no smile, no comfort,
seeing these attractions...
there are no reactions......
but, eyes are now seeking...
been unconsciously looking
for something that is unexplainable,
in denial, the mind is, it says: inconceivable...

There, among the shelves...
the search would shortly end...

An image of my face appeared on a mirror
passed by, then suddenly sprung out,
a swish of a shaped light
beside my own face
a passing thought of an image...
it made me smile,
the fog fading, the face, clearing a bit...

When it is within me, this presence,
everywhere, there springs exuberance
it is felt...needing space
not just a shadow, not just a trace...
to bring home, to be with ...
to end this seeking
to end this longing...

Too cumbersome, this weight..
too much to take for one.
there, among those shelves,
nothing could satisfy,
nothing could fill this empty space...
for some reason,  i feel, i know......
i must live on...i must move on
without this face, this presence,
this unattainable existence,
and yet, i must try,
i must still be able to smile....


Sally

Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
(Might be too mushy for some, this poem.... I was frustratingly sad while finishing this poem.. then I heard a familiar song being played on the radio...)



      by Nat King Cole

smile though your heart is aching
smile even though it's breaking
when there are clouds in the sky
you'll get by
if you smile
through your fears and sorrow
smile and maybe tomorrow
you'll see the sun come shining through
For you
light up your face with gladness
hide every trace of sadness
although a tear
may be ever so near
that's the time you must keep on trying
smile, what's the use of crying
you'll find that love is still worthwhile
if you just smile...
~~~~~
that's the time you must keep on trying
smile, what's the use of crying
you'll find that love is still worthwhile
if you just smile....
699 · Apr 2018
Meeting Fate
Sally A Bayan Apr 2018
(Haiku-10w-Haiku)
              
/:/::/:\::/  _  ||||||

Clock tick-tocked...rain poured
.....my mind swayed...a pendulum
........in the wide dim sky ...
~~~

.....thunder kindly hummed low,
.........hand, tapping, tipping
....my bubbly wineglass
~~~

i stood....stomped my feet
...then, entered an open gate...
there.................i met my fate...


Sally


© Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
April 27, 2018
:::
deciding is like entering an open gate
decisions we make , shape our fate...
:::
697 · Jun 2019
Predator
Sally A Bayan Jun 2019
<<<>>>

Better days have come and gone...
long time ago, man didn't need much...
life was simple...what he didn't know,
did not  affect him.
with his intelligence and understanding,
he was...is expected to respect and be kind
to his fellow humans...to the birds,
beasts, insects, rivers, oceans, trees,
mountains, rain forests, coral reefs...
God gave him all these and much more,
to use wisely and to preserve......but,

his curiosity and audacity intensified over
time....he has become materialistic, cruel
and greedy for power.......power, which is
obtained at all costs...

simple man of yore,
has become..........a predator;
and most of what surrounds him,
what sustains and nourishes him,
he has made...........his prey...
................................................
........­...................................
nature suffers.......humans suffer...
the whole world is hurting... from
wounds...........inflicted by man...



Sally

© Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
    June 26, 2019
696 · Sep 2024
Visage
Sally A Bayan Sep 2024
☁️☁️☁️


There's need for a break
days have been so chaotic

see, the door is ajar,
like a chance, given this hour

a way out...to breathe fresh
time to expel the toxic mess

meeting the air out the door
looking upwards, with pains to pour

welcomed by the splendifirous sky,
to its open-armed clouds i want to fly

and on the clear blue firmament
God, i must capture this moment

ton visage lointain*...smiles at me
i'm eased, unburdened suddenly.


sally b

Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
September 27, 2024
*("ton visage lointain"---your distant face)
694 · May 2016
BROKEN RECORD
Sally A Bayan May 2016
(((( broken record ))))

..........it usually depends...........
.......on prevailing circumstances.......
The fragility, or inconsistency of excuses
Can't just ignore the gravity of a situation
Some behaviors....need immediate attention
Could also be....the dominant mood of the day
The five girls say, it's not the day's.........but mine
However they look at it, or feel about it....they obey
Right values must be inculcated in their growing minds
Words have to be repeated....clarified.....and emphasized
Advice given by kinsfolk, must be heard.............and I smile,
As I ignore their pouting lips...unnecessary frowns....snorting.
Can't ever be their Wonder Woman....to keep them from falling,
So, with a loud or modulated voice...I say my piece over and over
Like a record gone awry....playing off and on.....every now and then.

Got to be broken at times
Got to play my music
As often as needed.

Sally


Copyright May 7, 2016
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
For all the parents and grandparents who become broken records to their growing kids and grandkids,...please, just do  it with grace....take it easy.....
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL THE MOTHERS, GRANDMOTHERS  OUT  THERE !!!
692 · Nov 2013
Nothing Wasted......10w
Sally A Bayan Nov 2013
l o v e,  u n s e e n...

b u t   f e l t.....

...u
      n
          f
             u
                 l
                     f
                          i
                              l
   ­                               l
                                ­      e
                                          d....

.......y­ e t...s o  a l i v e........

.......d e e p   w i t h i n.............


S a l l y

Copyright 2013
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
691 · Jul 2017
Charcoal
Sally A Bayan Jul 2017
It started with a few strokes,
a pointed charcoal,
pulsed...led by the
thumb and index finger, that
initiated a sway of arcs, the contours
of boyish hair, clinging to the nape
a few short strands on a not so wide
forehead,
very near...........a pair of
not so bushy eyebrows, under which
stared...peeping, smiling
almond-shaped, brown eyes.
then...followed gentle strokes
of perfect highs and lows
of a
medium-bridged
nose.
:::::
hills, valleys, and softened arcs
shaped and manifested character-
high cheekbones....a pointed,
but softened chin,
suddenly, i was
looking at
sensual,
full, pouting,
luscious lips.
:::::
index finger covered tip, to help
define jaws....then slid down lower,
a slick,
slender
neck
appeared,
propped up by
a shallow clavicle
and gently shaped  shoulders,
that fool judging eyes and minds
they seem small, and weak
and fragile, but, they can carry
tons of worries...determinedly.
:::::
fingers angled, pencil tip slowly
danced...in careful strokes,
and curved lines,
artfully creating
a valley,
'tween two heavenly mountains,
with pinkish brown crowns
conspicuously tensed at the tops...
pencil moved decidedly....so sure...but,
slow in shaping waist...then curved
on rounded hips..sliding inwards
to the front.....to a central point,
essential, fundamental, umbilical.
its surroundings raised, as if to protect
a knotted cord...filled with stories...closed,
atop a slightly fleshy belly...
from there, a short distance downward,
led to a hidden flower
the reason...a cradle...a port,
covered by a triangular shield,
squeezed in between
chubby thighs and legs.
:::::
lines went lower, narrower...
shaped a pair of fair feet,
with painted toes
ably supporting
a bare maiden
::::::::::::
wonderfully
sketched,
:::::::::
in
deep
charcoal.
:::::


Sally

Copyright July 30, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
...just dabbled...then wrote...
689 · Jun 2015
HOLIDAY
Sally A Bayan Jun 2015
(Love letter 3)


Letters are piling up, my dearest,
See, here's another one..

Today is not a busy day, the hours are slow
I'm giving my thoughts a go
Whether the sun smiles brightly
Or when overcast clouds would speak, "gloomy,"
I shall breathe deeply... enjoy my hours free...
Let my eyes and mind wander---
Here, there,
Places upon places
Faces upon faces
The present times and the old
Events that tomorrow may hold...

This...now...is my holiday moment,
I think of ripples, puddles and currents,
Cool breeze...and blue waves,
With them, I suddenly am brave
Thinking of past journeys, on beaten, as well as paved,roads
I am confident...Somebody watches me, through every stream I ford...

My holidays are moments
A blend of joy and torments,
I alone, hold my chin
When a smile becomes a grin
That turns to a soft sounding laugh
Because, the air I breathe becomes perfumed with hope,
And tap water tastes like some sweet tasting stuff.

In my heart, there is no room for wrath
Even when anxiety is the tar that stains my path
When I am black as coal, from despair...and I go down
Lower...surrendering to the ground
...without giving a sound
When the aching,
...the hurting,
Becomes too much
To bear for my stomach
When it takes a big effort, my breath, I catch,
To straighten...from a body so crouched.

Behind every smile, there hide my fears
But there is always the sun, the wind, to help dry my tears

I may be alone....or with friends,
Having drinks in the garden,
Or simply enjoying the starlit Heaven
They're bits and pieces of hours so precious
Coming through summer breezes
When leaves fall, like fading kisses
When feeling the rain touch my skin,
When times are tough, or smooth sailin'
When I shiver from the cold
Filled with the blue, and I can't be that bold
But....I am never alone, or without you
For, you are my air,  my every sigh
.....I think of you
With every breath I take....

Now, I must ask...
Do you have holiday moments, too?
Am I your holiday moment?
(December 14, 2014)

Me---
Sally

Copyright December 2014
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
687 · Nov 2013
Circumstances...
Sally A Bayan Nov 2013
The circumstances,
The clouds that once dimmed my mind
Are now gone...
I now see the light...bright...
Maybe, it is just wise,
Better, easier,
To change directions...
It behooves me
To fight the wind.
What else is new with pain?
We've been friends since time immemorial,
Pain and I...
Again, I shall survive...
Letting go would be my crucible,
Each passing day would be nothing less...
I would never be aware, when
Time, they say would be of help...
When sun and moon and stars,
Would bring lively colors to life anew...,
When there would be new reasons
To live for...to die for...
I shall face the challenge once again...
Just maybe, I could love someone new...
There would never be an equal,
Because I loved you first.
In all these confused moments
I find myself drowning in,
Nothing will ever change...
The fact still remains...
Friends, we shall always be...
Friends is all we'll ever be...
Be assured, I shall forever stay,
Your   O n e   T r u e   F a n ...
Ask me "Why?"
Same old answer...
" J u s t   B e c a u s e..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  Sally

   Copyright 2013
       Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
687 · Aug 2021
Clouds
Sally A Bayan Aug 2021
On a late afternoon stroll,
the blue sky slowly dims,
as billowing clouds of gray
and white, move farther and
farther away...like wavelets
on a stream.....always going
forward, never flowing back.

among a stream of faces, i wish
to be a shy spark, barely bright
like those tiny bearers of light
on starry or moon-glowed nights.

ah, to be like a child, with eyes
aglow, beaming with a smile,
when these dots of light
emerge on dark hours,
high and low...i forget life's
nagging murmurs of unfairness.

i err, as i am human, but when
i see the clouds, i see God's face.
He sees me without fail, as i rise
from the grass...or from a fall.

i join those low-keyed glowers at night,
with them, i'm just, a bigger firefly,
seeking truth in their short-lived light.
:::::::::::::
::::::::::

sally b

© Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
July 15, 2021
687 · Sep 2016
LOVESEAT
Sally A Bayan Sep 2016
You were seated on the loveseat,
yet beside you, i couldn't be
made me feel...i, alone, would face eternity,
between us, lay an immeasurable spread...
your distance, was something hard to invade,
some kind of steel.....unthinkable to pierce
but, i broke  your wall...fractured your fears
rose from my square pillows
defied my rules, my fears
fought your dominant shadows

I pushed you to the edge...i did leave you in rage,
ignored your dagger looks,
to give way to change

it took a while.......i thought long....what if........
......................................................­.......

so...i brought in soft buttered Spanish bread
thought i'd chill your rage, with fresh, iced lemonade
while you drank, i squeezed your hand,
teased you with a glance
a tickle here and there
til you grabbed my hand

ahh...i love your controlled smile...
from challenging moments...you and i rise
i'd say......we're worth every daring effort exerted,

Us two, on the loveseat,
side by side,
sitting comforted.





Sally


Copyright May 1, 2016
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
***another feel-good write.***
687 · Jun 2016
IMPEDIMENTS
Sally A Bayan Jun 2016
I have walked my paved and beaten roads
crossed my old and new bridges
and jumped my low and high hurdles,
unrelentingly... allowing nothing...or no one
to rise before me...and tell me : you are wrong,
when, i feel it so strong...that i am right!
no reason could be saner than what I've been taught
no voice, could be more reasonable...or gentler
than those voices of my folks...my childhood...my past,
nothing, or, no one...can ever destroy...or impede
this bursting...yet tempered love within...
i let it grow, the right way i know
i let it nourish my soul,
for, it saves me...from sunrise, to moon glow...


Sally

Copyright June 16, 2016
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
684 · May 2017
While we are sleeping...
Sally A Bayan May 2017
Long before
orange-purple-pink-bluish shades vanish,
......before light evens out upon us,
before billows of clouds scatter and
fill the magnificent powder blue skies,
...fields...and other workplaces, are
already humming with activities.
:::::::
air drowns with a stream of sounds,
human, and otherwise.......voices,
...teaspoons against cups, mixing
a dark waking brew...rushing footfalls,
instructions given..revving up tractor motors,
chairs, tables moving...computers starting,
:::::::
comes  coffee breaks...and day's end
then...we go home to whoever, whatever
meets us at our doorstep...whether
our life is a bed of roses, or a bed of thorns
...or, something in between....or a mix...
:::::::
minor, major changes occur here, there,
everywhere...every second, every minute...
some seasons, dragonflies overpopulate,
wasps and honey bees swarm for their own
different reasons...flower buds turn to blooms,
various birds build nests based on their needs,
cocoons hang hidden...in silence....yet,
when time is right, new butterflies unwrap
....................and emerge...
:::::::
each day consists of old and new patterns
that lead to magical, new beginnings...
new discoveries,often called miracles,
...they happen while we are sleeping
...............when no one is looking
........or, even when we are awake,
.....but, just too busy to notice...
:::::::
from a nearby...or distant river
a sea breeze blows, and cools,
brushes..and touches... then tiptoes,
prancing upon other running currents,
acknowledging...emphatically reminding
that blessings from God are ever flowing
every breath taken, is a miracle...occurring
....while we are awake...or sleeping
whether or not, someone is looking...
:::::::


Sally


Copyright May 21, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
684 · Apr 2017
Traditions
Sally A Bayan Apr 2017
i am struggling
my sense-seeking mind, reasons
with my confused, but forgiving heart...
to go, or not to go,
to do...or not to do,
go with traditions...or start a change,
to abstain...to be absent,
.............and...be ******

this battle exhausts me...though,
i know...at any time, whatever i do,
especially, this lenten season
God is everywhere, i so feel Him,
He is near me.....as i think of Him...

it doesn't make me less of a Christian
i just have less things to do
this thursday, friday and saturday...
for, i opted for something else:

in my solitude, i would have---

M-ORE time...........to reflect.....to
E-NGAGE in contemplative thoughts...to be strong, to
A-VOID all kinds of meat i so hunger for....to not be
T-ROUBLED, when tremors of the soul, seek to destabilize...

I know myself...i've come this far,
traditions may change, things may falter,
but, never...my Faith in Him.....


Sally


Copyright April 14, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
***HAPPY EASTER TO EVERYONE!!!***
683 · May 2020
SHE
Sally A Bayan May 2020
SHE
Memories of this lady never leave my mind.
she wasn't a rider, but acted better than one,
riding high above many hurdles in life...fear
never took her away from her responsibilities...

when the fuse in the main switch gave
way, and dimmed the old house, this lady
braved the dark...armed with a flashlight
and pliers, she replaced the burnt fuse with
a new one and brought light back.....each
time the old-fashioned flat iron overheated,
she easily replaced the glass-like insulator  
inside, so it could right away be used again...

whatever needed repair---garment, tools,
the fence, the house...ripped, or with holes,
she mended and patched...even blind-hemmed
a torn relationship once...yes, she mended
cracks...was always in the midst of broken
vases, gluing pieces back together, so she
may put water and lovely flowers in it...

nothing was impossible for this gentle lady...
she moved mountains for her loved ones,
always persevering and ingenious, life
became less difficult...she painted their
young minds with a mix of hues,
so they may appreciate and be
grateful for rainbows and yellow sunrises,
learn to accept black, gray, unhappy moments,
and be thrilled by fiery orange sunsets....

this lady is indispensable...and irreplaceable,
SHE, and others like her, are called mama,
muter, mom, mum, majka, inay/nanay, mae,
matka, madre, mom....ahh, the list is long...


Sally

Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
May, 8, 2020
(SHE... was our late mama.)

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL THE MOTHERS AND GRANDMOTHERS OUT THERE!!!
681 · Jun 2015
IN THE NAME OF LOVE
Sally A Bayan Jun 2015
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

In the name of love

We see light
In every dark

The world seems to be angry...rebelling
Waters rise, and flood the surfaces
The earth opens its mouth and just swallows
Skies are turning darker
Some areas never see light
Thunder gets to be louder,
Lightnings are fiercer,
It's not surprising when they spew fire,
People die fast, some old, some very young
Babies are born by the second
Their futures unknown,
Their safety compromised
Not a pleasant scenario
And yet, we still look up to the Heavens
There is love...there is hope.

When we are in dire straits,
When nothing, or no one can be swayed,
Some light, or somebody
Will pave the way towards a resolution
Or a compromise to start on.
Amidst a tumultuous crowd,
There is space found
There is air to breathe
We pray  
We make peace rule the heart and mind
Ahead...and behind,
Because of love
Every hurdle could be overcome,
Things would be fine!

On a morning after the storm
When the gray sky refuses to become white,
Somehow, a little sun tries to peep with a shine,
To smile... shyly on us.

In every dark
We see light

In the name of love.

from last November's journals



Sally

Copyright June 14, 2015
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
681 · Oct 2014
One August Full Moon Night
Sally A Bayan Oct 2014
(Rambling thoughts on a full moon night)

High up there, I glance at you,
You hide again, sometimes peeping,
While I put aside
My worries for this day.
Gray waves and curves  shroud you
This early August evening...
Right this moment, you are out, perfectly rounded.
We watch each other,
You eye me down,
I look above, to you...
We speak in our silence,
With me, listening,
Offering all the warmth I could share with you,
You, with your Ivory white light, cold and distant
Unlike your warm yellow crescent
of some nights ago.

This evening, scary images have no places to go,
For you awaken in me
Dormant, unsettling thoughts.
I am confused, yet,
You show me a panoramic view of faces,
They dwell in my mind as I gaze at you.
But there is this brilliant one
That smiles beneath your moon glow,
It stares me in the eye,
Speaks to me, without words.

My breathing evens out,
It becomes a melody,
Because the time has arrived,
These few moments,
When restlessness drifts away
As you shine down on me,
When impatience departs from me,
And I am calmed suddenly,
And I don't know what else to think of,
For, this evening,
You, and this brilliant face have once again
Comforted me.
I am warmed, I am glad.

And I, now smiling, looking up at you,
My August moon, I bid you goodnight,
I am beaming, as silently, I thank you.


Sally

Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
***August 11, 2014---8:23 PM...
-not much to share, just a brief evening break, a short,
-wordless conversation, between the moon and me...***
680 · May 2018
Come to me....
Sally A Bayan May 2018
dear ones )/)(/\|\//open your hearts\spill out your
pain and sorrow unto this vast, moist earth, whisper
to me your secrets...i never tire, i listen....//)\ i hear
everything )(/)(/ be healed, be soothed by my cool
touch (/ be embraced by the wind that sways me \/
kneel over me, let your tears fall upon me, feed me
with your heartaches, your brokenness...bury them
'neath my roots, i'll choke them with my tight grasp.
in the open air...shout out your dragons, your night-
mares....let the wind blow your dark shadows away
let the sun melt them, deny them space  \/)/  i cover
the soil with a green  carpet.....one with the sun, the
wind, and the rain....i go wet, i go dry....i thirst, and
i swallow them all \\||....i am the grass ../)//((\



Sally
© Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
November 13, 2017
I wrote this...as I was thinking of my granddaughters...how to keep them safe from harm...even when  I am no longer around...
678 · Aug 2015
^^^^^Bats In Flight^^^^^
Sally A Bayan Aug 2015
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 


When still, there was light,
not one of them was in sight
they hang upside down
certain not to fall on the ground
this very moment, i  hear their wings flap
deep into the night, they won't stop
here, there...they fly...so alive...so brave,
as they emerge  from shielded nests and caves

i feel them...but do they feel me?
i hear them...do they hear me?
i am not too far from their realm
between us stands a concrete wall, high and firm
do they know that at night, like them,  I stay awake?
amassing all the strength i can...to fight the ache?

my own shaded presence weighs over my head like a block
i sail on long rivers of angst and despair, during nights so black...
see, this has made me oblivious, of my fear of the dark

as first light comes...tiny bursts of rays peep, and start to spread
what little dark is left, they rush, then hide from the light they dread
silenced, as sun is upon us...this life of theirs, they never intended
and i, through the day, must appear as a super hero...impenetrable
for the others, see me with strength, unwavering...dependable

i often wonder if my courage is feigned
was this acquired from an avalanche of pain
kept from long ago
that i just couldn't show?
if so, why do i feel at times, that my efforts are in vain?

late, late hours, i gather every drop  of courage
as these sharp-eyed bats in flight, fearlessly crash...as if in outrage.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^batsinflight^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Sally

­Copyright August 8, 2015
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
677 · Oct 2016
B O X
Sally A Bayan Oct 2016
Box

Shared visions and promises
Written on yellow papers
Invisibly marked....faded, broken promises
Endearing terms...endearing moments,
Old postcards...old photos and letters
Time-colored...marked souvenirs,
I kept them inside....all stored in a case....
Unexpectedly, the Heavens cried in anger, one day
I rushed, to hold tiny currents at bay...to save
The memories...but the box was no longer there
Those gifts, letters, souvenirs were nowhere
Almost a lifetime...stored in there
But...monsoon rains took them all away...forever
::::::::::::::::::::::::
Got to find myself, a new box....


Sally

Copyright October 15, 2016
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
676 · Jan 2015
COPY THE CAT
Sally A Bayan Jan 2015
If you are so sad, mad, eager, anything,
but cannot say a word,
You dont want to hurt anyone,
Copy the cat, and
Just say "Meow,"
Make it "Meeeowww"
Or "Mew"
Or "MEOW!!!"
In whatever mood you are...
Copy the cat...


Sally

Copyright 2015
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
675 · Mar 2024
I Cannot Not Remember
Sally A Bayan Mar 2024
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::­:::::::::::::



I cannot not remember my mother,
whatever time...whatever day,
during work or while viewing sunsets
while relaxing...or while too stressed,
her face...smiling or wearing a frown,
or a tune of a song she used to sing,
all these hover over everything
around me, they dangle like tassels
of memories,
they make me recall more.

I cannot not remember the scents
of flowers in my mother's garden
that she used to grow and love,
for they all still exist  in my garden,
dishes she used to cook for us,
I now cook for my own family.

When a breeze brushes over me,
i cannot not remember, how in the
early mornings of her life, my mother
had rushed to the church, to hear
mass...to serve God 'til the last days
of her life...she did, in every way.

I cannot not remember my own mother,
for i saw in her how to be a mother
and a grandmother
with love, extreme effort and care.


sally b

© Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
February 24, 2024
...was reading some works by Rabindranath Tagore,
and I ended up with this poem...
673 · Jul 2024
Dignified Silence
Sally A Bayan Jul 2024
~~~
~~~~~
~~~~~~~

This summer's heat was worse,
problems are at their extremes,
burning, like undying embers.

Murmurs in government, in
public and private communities,
create chaos.

Repetition, initiates a desire
to walk away from what upsets
even for a while...some just

Laugh things off, too tired of
useless smiles and handshakes,
some get fed up, walk away, and

Go to the waters, to the shores
filled with voices crying for peace,
seeking justice.

Throughout our struggles...the
battles we fight, we always must
maintain a dignified silence.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We deserve some respect
no matter
what.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Monsoon season has come,
soon...rain will pour and
shall inundate.


sally b

© Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
July 8, 2024
672 · Feb 2016
SECOND SKIN
Sally A Bayan Feb 2016
(fourteen lines).....

It could be a gentle breeze...it could be a mist
Sometimes, it's a whiff of patchouli
Oftentimes, it comes so strong
Like drops...or splotches of pure lavender oil
On my collar, my sleeves, on my chest, especially
......where it feels so close to my heart<3
At night, it is a moth flying past my cheeks
The softest voice carressing my ears
For, it is light....as whisp'ry cloth
Almost like an invisible touch
A quick, transparent passing of sweet air
That clings to my being,
I wear it upon...and within me
Your scent.....is my second skin...


Sally


Copyright February 3, 2016
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
***Happy Valentine's Day to all<3 ***
671 · Feb 2014
SILENCE...
Sally A Bayan Feb 2014
I
feel
you all
over me,
and yet, you
a r e   nowhere
n e a r.  It is  the
q u i e t u d e  that
b r i n g s  to mind all
there  is  about you.  You
come alive whether I look up
the ceiling, or straight  through
t h e  walls,  I close  my  eyes,  and
I still find you there. At this point, not
even the slightest s o u n d  could  shatter
the flow of m e m o r i e s, nor could it distract
the serenity I have always  known when I'm  alone,
for, it  is in  S I L E N C E  that I find you closest to me...

(Published 1997)


Sally

Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A.Bayan

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
667 · Feb 2017
MUSIC...
Sally A Bayan Feb 2017
......plays a big part in our daily lives.

we hear the tune,
we sway, blend in...
we engage in the dance,
we enjoy...sometimes, we clash
with the dialogues, the tempo...we end up staggering,
.....and find ourselves, displaced......

still, we rise from the alien ground
where we surrendered our weight,
ponder on the hows and whys,
dance...sway...blend in, anew,
master the beat of the music
every step and turn of the dance,
we try to avoid to reel again...especially,
on the same part of the tune,
on the same spot where we once fell...

life is a large, brightly lighted stage,
we...are the dancers, the singers, the actors...
some of us opt to be dramatists, or merely listeners,
or obsevers........but, we....are all performers,
in this huge...circular stage...where,
all kinds of drama, and music play......

Sally

Copyright February 11, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
667 · Sep 2016
DIRECTIONS
Sally A Bayan Sep 2016
(a repost)


<----???----->


When we're          
                    D    
                    O
 ­                   W
                    N...... b e l o w......    
                                                     ­           ­              P!!!
                                  ­                                       U _                      
                                                               ­       |
             there's no other way, but......_|




Sally


Copyright November 2014
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
***what goes up
     must come down
      but, we must not stay too long below
...   we strive...to rise again...***

(...i thought of reposting this...thinking of a friend...)
663 · May 2014
A Dialogue....
Sally A Bayan May 2014
A Dialogue....


I promised I would pray for her and her loved ones
Here I am, just starting to talk, in silence...
Instead, I find myself assailed by questions,
You are an understanding God, never exacting,
Never angry, I have never questioned You,
But today, I honestly ask You:
Why is this happening? How could this be?
How could You have allowed this? Why?
When will this stop? How much longer?
Have mercy!
Have mercy, please...please...
Heal their sorrow, this pain, make it end...
Make them stop, the leaving....
She has lost one, two already,
The tears may now be dry,
And yet, she, they still cry....
How hard it is, to cry without tears.....
What has been done cannot be undone...
So I beg You, please, make the hurting stop,
Let them be healed,
Give them Your miracle....
Now....


Forgive me, my Lord, for questioning Your decisions...
Forgive me for even thinking of questioning you...
I know I am silly most times, but,
Thank you, God, for always listening...


(For Maria )



Sally

Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
Hearts and minds are overladen
The weight, the pain, immeasurable
even for us who love them dearly...
Those who are near, watch them go through their sorrow, their pain...
While those of us who are distant, can only sense, anticipate, hope and pray...
658 · Jun 2017
F A T H E R S
Sally A Bayan Jun 2017
Fathers don't always show their feelings, they're not

As demonstrative and warm as most mothers are...yet,

Their love goes silently beyond immeasurable...it's admirable

How they hold their weak moments, without a tear falling...they're

Esteemed...admired...like a statesman of enduring greatness

Rapidly, silently perceiving the needs of their children, their family......always

S-elfless! To fathers, family is a priority!

::::::

He is made of  concrete,
******...always replete
with pebbles of love...and warmth
yet, soft as satin...in his home, he is the hearth,
the wall...his family...the fire burning in his heart:::



Sally

Copyright June 17, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
***HAPPY FATHER'S DAY TO ALL THE FATHERS, GRANDFATHERS
      ADOPTIVE FATHERS AND ALL OUT THERE!!!***
655 · Mar 2014
B R I E
Sally A Bayan Mar 2014
---a cheese-tasting cat? or a cat-tasting cheese? no, of course not!
             ---it is a cat named after a kind of cheese---

      
A picture of the late kitty, Scheppes,
appears on the computer,
she still, is the chosen wall paper...
she once ruled  the place, and
the heart of her master...
she was so adorable,
everyone must have dwelt on the thought,
she is irreplaceable...
but wait.....
what is this heap on the table
carelessly scattered,  sprawled?
a child's  coat?
with black stripes over gray fur?
what are these glowing,
green crystal buttons?

aha! suddenly, there is movement!
it is alive!

head and paws, now are visible,
green crystal buttons have turned
to emerald-eyes, now piercing,
glowing even more...
she shows her white vest underneath,
standing on her two paws,
clinging tighter to her master's feet...
to him, she softly purrs,
communicating in whispers,
staring over-confidently,
glaring eyes, slitting eyes
accompanying her every meow...
obviously, she feels contented,
lazily, peacefully slouched now,
between the keyboard
and her master...
young still,  naughty,
the house seems small to her whims,
too obsessed at times with Q-Tips,
sleepy after all her mischief,
seeming lethargic at times,
always savoring that feeling of peace,
happiness, she once didn't have...
for she has now found a new home,
she has found a new master to love,
one who would surely love her in return...

her name is B R I E ...*



Sally

Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
***Brie is Richard Riddle's new cat....***
654 · Feb 2015
STATISTICS
Sally A Bayan Feb 2015
by
KARL SIMON S. CHUA


Not telling you
How many years

187 followers
Following back 144
125 total works posted here
19 persons collaborated
57 works trended (45.6%)
1 work as a daily (0.8%)

So what?

I hope I inspired
I hope I made you smile
I hope I made your days
As you all made mine

Going away
Thanks for everything....

©Karl Simon S. Chua 2015


A farewell piece from Karl Simon Chua....a fellow Filipino I am  
so proud of.  His decision to leave  HP has saddened me,
  but he has his reasons. I am sorry I could no longer
     persuade him to do otherwise.   He is a fine,
      talented poet, versatile, very  promising,
    armed with a good sense of humor.
      He definitely, will be missed.

     ---------------------------
    --------------
Sally
***Karl will still receive messages here on HP or on Facebook...***
654 · Jan 2016
MOUNTAINS
Sally A Bayan Jan 2016
(out in the open)

Eyes see a plane gaining speed...now airborne
Soaring...from a background of bright, lush horizon
Out in the open
I see the high and low....of slopes...undulating,
Curves and points abound...showing
A rising
A falling.
Surface is covered with grass, bushes and trees
A pallette of nature's colors...brown, yellow ochre, red, orange, green
All are nurtured by light from sun
All are watered by dew and rain.
Outdoors, or indoors...there truly is a rising
always followed...by a falling
To show and prove, a story of birthing
how it is.....when surviving
and what transpires...when in the process of dying

Alone...out here in the open
I am infinitesimal...just a dot, amidst this vastness
There's no one, just me...no rush...nothing is hastened
When i speak...aloud, in whispers...Somebody always listens
Even when i don't speak at all.
There is calm...yet the sounds are endless
The mockingbirds are singing...wind is whirring
Somewhere, water is flowing, running,
...all are ceaseless...

Now and then, heart beats, way too restless
Followed by a moment of helplessness
Have i strayed towards a path of selfishness?
Could there be a need for more...of selflessness?

In this diurnal existence, i am surrounded by mountains
On my own, i could never conquer those soaring cones on my horizon
But, i lift my eyes, up there...without a fiber of pretense
Surrendering  my shoulders, my all, to a known Omnipresence.

I dwell on a promise long time spoken
That, no matter how high my mountains
No matter how heavily laden
Just  a look up to the Heavens
Will make a big difference,
For, in my heart,
I know,
I believe:
Prayers
Can
Move
Mountains.


Sally


Copyright January 8, 2016
rrab
651 · Sep 2014
TRAPPED
Sally A Bayan Sep 2014
I can't breathe well
For I have been wrapped
Now, I am trapped...

I am usually sweet,
But sometimes I come sour,
Most often crunchy, though now
I've been sliced,
Sprinkled profusely
With sugar and spices.
Occasionally, I am latticed,
But today, I've been topped,
Adorned with slits
Which doesn't help one bit,
For I could hardly vent.

What goes on next
I can't stand any longer.

There's hot air escaping,
Still, I can't very well breathe,
For I have been wrapped,
I am inevitably trapped...

I am now a perfect circle,
Steaming hot...smelling good...
Soon to be sliced, served, eaten...
I am a plate of freshly baked
Apple Pie...




Sally

Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
***If we allow ourselves to be manipulated or victimized,
      we have only ourselves to blame, for ending up
      "wrapped and trapped," like a plate of apple pie...***
650 · Aug 2018
Eclipsed
Sally A Bayan Aug 2018
We are all planters and sowers
in this huge field...where seeds
of graces and blessings, as well
as trials and tribulations (i call
them weeds), are strewn in all
places...made to blend...to help
shape and strengthen our faith,
character, our emotional stamina...
all these seeds and weeds, paint
our earthly existence with bright
and darkened hues: blue, gray, black,
green...red, purple, yellow ochre, bronze,
and countless other colors of the universe.
it seems, we human beings are born with
coloring books, bearing our names..it's up
to us to paint them on canvas, or in words
...it's up to us, to bring light to our own
darkness, or,  to make them blacker than
a starless midnight......maybe an ebony
horizon to those blinded by stubborn beliefs...

truths that weren't perceptible then,
are much more visible and vivid now
i recall...when troubles piled up then,
i forgot to pause...to analyze,

i saw small alleys, when there were
wider streets...it didn't occur to me,
i must have the fortitude...to search...

i saw crowds, when there was much
space on this earth...failed to realize
that there were lessons to learn from
crowds, that i could create better space,
that these weeds also bring graces...

while looking at the atmosphere, my
eyes, my mind were totally eclipsed,
almost blinded...seeing only dismal skies,
when there could've been sunlight,
if i wanted to...within myself, or around
me...regardless, if it was stormy outside.

i could've created a gap from grief
i forgot that, light and dark take turns
...come what may.....they alternate...

much lessons and wisdom were gained
from younger days...........it is true...
we cannot change what we've started
yet, we can begin where we are right now
and create a different ending...



Sally

© Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
    August 16, 2018
"You can't go back and change the beginning,
  but you can start where you are and change
  the ending."        
    -----by C. S. Lewis
649 · Feb 2017
THE DAWNING
Sally A Bayan Feb 2017
(Secret Place)
(love poem# 2)


There's a very special place i know.....so calm,
so peaceful, with its Caribbean blue sky,
made bluer by light orange streaks...nearby,
a stream of silver water, flows gently...its tune
relaxes the mind, for, simultaneously, a breeze
blows softly...touches my face, arms, like a kiss,
a cold brush against my skin, that wakes, and
holds still, my wandering mind.....so i'd notice a
heavenly garden....with fragrant blossoms and
tamed colors, to soothe my weary eyes, my soul...
it is a haven so private...only for me, to go to...
yet... i see you there...where i hide my dreams,
my private feelings, my dark moments, my doubts,
my fears, my enlightened moments, you know them
all, spot on...without me telling you...we are mates,
you, me, we fit into place, in every space...even in the
small recesses, and holes of our souls, we silently agree,
doors i have long closed...feelings i've tossed in the dark,
you sensed them all............we...are two hands clasped...

this has become our secret haven, our sacred place,
here, where we surrender ourselves to each other,
here, where we share quiet moments all alone,
here, where started, and bloomed...a dawning,
here, where, all our eyes, all our hearts longed for,
we now behold....we now feel....we now embrace...


Sally


Copyright February 4, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
647 · Mar 2018
Zombie
Sally A Bayan Mar 2018
(10ws x4 )



P A S S - ing
::::::::::::::
moments
::::::::::
enfeeble one
:::::::::::
mentally
:::::::::::
emotionally
:::::::::::
phys­ically,
:::::::::::
time moves
::::::::::
slowest,
::::::::::
~~~~~~~

unfocused eyes
:::::::::::::::::
numbed heart,
:::::::::::::
dreary thoughts
::::::::::::::::::
render the mind
::::::::::
WEARY
::::::::::
~~~~~~~

be obeisant
:::::::::::::::
body and mind
:::::::::::::::
flow,
:::::::::::::::::::
harmonize,
:::::::­:::::
recapture
::::::::::::::::
lost CHI
:::::::::::::::
~~~~~~

wind enfolds,
::::::::::::::::
heals the soul,
::::::::::::::::
positive air
:::::::::::::::
f r e s h e s t,
:::::::::::::::
at  SUNRISE
:::::::::::
~~~~~~~

(PEACE  to everyone. Good morning!)


Sally

Copyright September 2, 2015
rrab
*** P A S S = pain, anger, sadness, .........
*** (i forgot what the second S stands for)
646 · Sep 2018
Friday Night Scenes
Sally A Bayan Sep 2018
(haikus)


Cold night by the swamp,
faint moon hides troubled whirlpools
wind roars...reeds bend low...

not far from swamp glow
owl struts on branch, and hoots on,
dogs howl.......wings flap close

hot fear flickers, this
september's dark friday night,
shadow's drenched with sweat


Sally

© Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
    September 7, 2018
First Friday,  September 7, 2018
646 · Jul 2017
BY THE SHORE...
Sally A Bayan Jul 2017
By the shore...

.....i dropped wearily, on the sand...

"O, silent dragon, as you lurk, my cold sweat
....merges with a rush of angry waves
lapping ******* me...i'm a boat, that keeled,
i'm already scared as dead,
of something that can't ever yield."

i bit my lower lip, prickly with salty water
stinging my eyes...i'm all wet, with salty water
restlessly...alternately, legs are spreading,
toes touching tight......then crisscrossing
shifting positions...left, right, forward,  
then backward
thoughtfully lowering hand, feeling ****,

..."my poor weary ones, i'm sorry,
......for too long...i tarry
so much weight you carry."

sand was warmer where i sat,
above, a spinning atmosphere
i stood up...reeling....fell on my back
made a loud splash on that
afternoon's sea water...i was squinting,
my face, i was repeatedly wetting,
to douse panic that was clawing
on the heart....though the cold was soothing,
i knew...a red-eyed green monster was lying
beneath........keeping vigil.........waiting
patiently for me.......to relax my defenses,
then fall........and let go of my reflexes,
its fiery eyes, anticipating its success.

"o, am i but a coward? I sway, my feet sashay
i am very sane....and definitely, not lame
i know......myself,  i can never betray.
you and i, we've been watching each other,
for years........would this go on forever?"
::::::
"great fear, my old friend, why do you accompany me?
you pulsate in every corner within me
i'm too visible
too vulnerable.
i am farthest from the lips of the shore,
yet, i feel you, a monster, watching me from afar..."


intense fear...births a rebel
weariness takes over.....it opposes, it swells
takes a turn, throwing caution to the wind.
lumps of wet sand drop from gripped hands,
later, they'll be dry and loose again,
free.....and reunited with the rest.

"each time i struggle, i miraculously survive,
...like you, my green dragon, you persist...stay alive,
...ebbing, flowing with the waves.....in my mind,
............where, you comfortably hide......"

Sally

Copyright June 15, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
(feeling my waters on this figure of speech
  ....hope i did it right)
643 · Apr 2017
Captured
Sally A Bayan Apr 2017
A wind passed, and roused my lethargic mind
then, i noticed golden yellow leaves
starting to drop from  the money tree.
as a young girl, i recall chasing leaves falling
careful not to let them touch the green grass.
i pondered on my own invented game...do i run?
to catch, or not to catch.....even one leaf
was a child's dilemma...that became mine,
for, a leaf falling, is a poem, starting...
a love...blooming....or, an elusive one
or one that's struggling...

after a fall, comes the rising...where
something should be bravely emerging,
this is the time, when tamed, unnamed feelings
suddenly, become verses, sliding from the tongue,
mind is active, hand is alive, pen hurriedly writes
the soon-to-be-born poem,
...the one hashtagged...chased...or sought.
a word, a name, a face forgotten, now remembered,
a love...that is fading, or falling out,
all these should be held, grabbed...captured!
before they truly escape from our grasp
or, be blown further away...by a cold, autumn wind
...and leave us drowning, in a stream of regret...


Sally


Copyright April 19, 2017
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
641 · Sep 2017
Friday Night Haikus
Sally A Bayan Sep 2017
::::::::::::::::::::::::


Nary a frog croaks
terra cotta garden lamp
selfishly, glows dim.

a striped gastropod
stretched longer, out of its shell
braver....in the dark

neighbors' dogs howl deep,
gecko sings its night songs loud
bats crash...swoop their prey.....

unseen black cats cross
there's no wind, yet...leaves rustle
shadows multiply

the dark feeds the mind
superstition lives...it breathes
moon hides...........i shall, too...


Sally

copyright September 22, 2017
rrab
...it's like, my dead folks are still around when observing
    these superstitious beliefs...they had such great influence on us,
    we never forget....
640 · Aug 2019
The Trip
Sally A Bayan Aug 2019
Time spent traveling is time wisely spent,
hours are filled with enriching experiences
and soul-searching moments

my morning trip to San Diego was such...
my eyes feasted on a blue-green ocean,
with daring surfers atop cresting waves;
and then there were my fellow farers...

the atmosphere inside the Amtrak
was a mix of moods...of voices of folks...
silent ones slept the whole trip...several,
had coffee and bread, while reflecting...
some were already working ahead of time,
giving instructions via their mobile phones...
a few were smiling, taking life positively,
maybe, dwelling on pleasant memories;
others wore serious faces...in deep thought,
maybe thinking of love's and life's unfairness,
sad realities they leave behind each morning,
the same ones they go home to each night.

boarding a train is one chapter,
getting off is another.....the platform is
where situations end, or, a fresh start awaits:
new job, a family...finding one's self somewhere,
ending a relationship...moving on when a loved
one dies...drifters are ever, "just passing through,"
they go....wherever the train takes them...

trips are inward journeys...the hours open
and clear our minds, leaving realizations
and wiser perspectives over nagging issues
we shun...or, defy; we try to change what
can be changed in our lives...and accept
with peace...what...cannot be changed...

we are on a journey...we are farers all,
...........in this train...called life...


Sally

© Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
July 5, 2019
Sally A Bayan Feb 2018
<3  <3  <3

L-ove of my life
I-s a
S-ong
T-hat plays on in my
E-ars and head, without end
N-othing else is

H-eard...or felt
E-xcept that sound....its fragrant
A-ir...moist with mist...a caress on my face,
R-enewing  my strength, with its
T-unes, so sweet.........this song,

I-nsists...it wants me to feel its energy...a
T-ender  touch on my
S-kin, that clothes my whole being...like a

V-estment...with warmth reassuring...that of an
A-ngel.....with a haloed collar, bright...to guide, to
L-ight my way...my view...my heart, here on
E-arth...each day..........don't fail me, my love, i am
N-eeding...when you are nowhere...but when we're
T-ogether.....nothing, no one else exists between us...for
I-n the space within your arms...i am home
N-urtured...by your
E-ndless flow of verses....i am cuddled...i am
S-hielded..........in my dreams, you have no

D-eath...and so, i, too, have no death...i am kept
A-live........undying........sustained by
Y-our breaths of love, through your poetry <3

Sally

Copyright February 13, 2018
rrab

Happy Valentine's Day to everyone!!!
...a valentine's day nonsense poem :))
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