every love song i listen to is always dedicated to you

In a box
trapped in a box
of darkened despair
no escape to light
feel deprived
no oxygen to breathe
so tight struggle
in your deepest darkest
hour
its a daunting struggle
of a darkened world
in a box
so cold chill as ice
hearts so cold dull
saddened of the fear
crippling with terror
as you shed that lonely tear
in a box
deepened by those thoughts
fighting to escape
for just that bit of air
body trembles just for that
little light
to seek from this box of
dark despair
in a box
so alone so alone
in that darkest hour
just wanting that little air to breathe
just that little light to shine
in the world deep dark despair

In A Box
by Deb Harman ©

///
the ladies look odd---
****--
helpless, powerless---
shaky-

when I see
girls waiting at the corner of the road,
in front of a brand new black Ford
red lipstick with red rose--
in a nightclub with a **** model pose--
buying, selling and contracting
with thee,
they are paying, trading,  
and making  X- Film,
online *** service,
growing *** worker,
making capital to grow capitalism  

I can't do anything,
only I can sigh,
I am too worn only a smile
and making a sad love song for her(victims)
you, my friend, hear in a car
and moving so far

Ah!! my friend,
'O' ! my love--
you see, we are in dark!
slowly and slowly we feel,
how the poison grabbing our body and soul!!
///
@ Musfiq us shaleheen

Your perfection,
       Toned
    And beautiful
Down to your soul
       Radiating from your pores
   Couldn't know you better
Or anymore
       So in love

Your secrets,
         Scary
   And unknown to me
Deep in your depths
          Discovering one at a time
      Knowing you less and less
  With every darkness
          I find

Your anger
          Morbid
      And apparently deadly
How could you do this to me?
    Throwing in a hole, my almost lifeless body
        I thought I knew you before
   But I discovered your secrets,
             Your lies
      The last ounce of love I had leaves
          As the final pile of dirt covers my eyes
      **Burying me alive

Mama warned me countless of times
Never walk alone along the alley at night, "Call me or papa to pick you up"
I took it lightly, thinking it was just another preach-teach
If only I'd listened to her
If only I was stronger

I still walked lightly drunken down that alley that
horrible night,
a pure, broken white lamb limping down the street
just waiting for a black fox of the night to
come enrapture me,
take me away from everything,
as I stood, cold and uncomforted from the night's drunken stupor,
and crying.

As I keep on walking
His voice was still there
In my head screaming,
"You deserved this, shut up!
Wearing like a desperate ****!
Just let me taste you stupid ****!!!"
No matter how i screamed, his immense hands shrouding my mouth tightly.
The more i screamed, the more pain he puts me in.

A couple shoves,
a few bruises,
a yank,
and my silenced whimpers
as he ferociously goes in,
once, twice, too many times.
I'm trapped, heaving...
I should have listened to Mama...

Flashbacks ran through my head
How defiant I am towards my parents
How I always skipped anything physical, always judging girls on how they look.
It's happening to me now
I can do nothing but cry and give in
When he was done, he told me he'll **** my whole family if I tell the police.
I continue walking as my worth fading slowly.

And my fire burned out,
as I stopped struggling,
stopped making any noises,
and just lay still,
as he licked me and caressed me,
he's new found toy,
only to be tossed away later.

As I finally reached my nest,
I couldn't find the words to tell mama.
Not one person, not my boyfriend, not a soul. His face still haunts me every now and then.
He became this demon in my head
That will never go away.
It's been months now,
But this demon got my soul caged
And my lips zipped.
Not a single soul will ever know

Smile. They are watching.
Silence. They are listening.
Run. They are behind you.
Hide. They are coming.
Deny. They suspect.
Admit. They know.
Give in. They have won.

They won because you smiled,
Because you allowed them to silence you.
Because you ran,
Because you denied,
Because you admitted.
You lost because you gave in.
Give yourself a round of applause, they caught you.

Do not cry, do not lie, do not let the guilt eat you alive;
You are already dead.
At their hand, at your own.
Look at the bodies lying around you,
The ruined souls who too gave in.
You are not alone,
Your weakness is shared,
Part of the fabric of our ****** reality.

Do not blame them, they are not the only culprits.
You chose to be blind, to be deaf, to be something you are not.
You chose the disguise.
Now you cannot shed that cast.
Welcome to your new reality....
The reality of greed and pleasure;
Is it everything you dreamed it would be?
Or are the casualties staining your new life with their blood and broken bodies?

Welcome to Utopia.